8: 51 AM. 16^th of December. You laid in your bed even though you’ve woke up for more than an hour. You felt sad, but you didn’t know why. ‘He’s hardly a friend to me, I’ve barely known him for three days. Why should I care so much?’ You thought. Just then, your phone rang. A text message.

‘I’m free today! Sorry about yesterday, lets go out today, okay?’ He added a cute emoticon at the end of the text message. There goes your plan of trying to be mad at him. A smile clung on your face as you happily told him that you were free too, and planned out where to meet up for brunch.

You put on your hoodie and jeans. Today was quite warm compared to other days in winter. You went out after saying goodbye to your mom, which was still in the living room. You took your time as you walked to where the both of you were supposed to meet, since it was still early. The both of you agreed to meet up at the toy store. Childish? Toys are never too childish, they’re cute.

Surprisingly, Joon was already there when you reached. ‘You’re early.’ You said, a small smile on your face. ‘You’re early too.’ He grinned. He looked handsome when he smiled, but something was different about him today. He had a cap on, with a baseball shirt and jeans. His cheeks look more sunken in than they already were before, and he looked worn out and sick.

‘Are you okay? You look.. tired.’ You asked. You didn’t know why, but you felt like he was trying to hide something as he told you, ‘Yeah, I’m fine. Just slept a little later yesterday.’ As he went into the toy store, he told you, ‘I want to look for a hulk plushie! The cute type.’ He bit his lips, making a cute face.

You pretended to scoff and called him childish. ‘Fine. The first one that finds it in this huge toy store wins, and the loser pays for our brunch, okay?’ You said, grinning. He nodded his head and ran off to look for the soft toy. You did the same thing.

‘FOUND IT!’ You shouted loudly and you ignored the stares you got from everyone else. Joon groaned. ‘I WAS SO CLOSE TO FINDING IT!’ He pouted and ran to where you were. The Hulk was in your hands, it was a mini version with a bigger head than body, and it. Was. So. Cute. You cuddled it tightly, before pushing it into Joon’s arms. He chuckled. ‘Cute, isn’t it?’ You nodded.

He paid for it before going out. ‘Seems like someone owes me breakfast…’ You mumbled in a joking tone,  glancing and Joon from the side of your eyes. He threw his arm around your shoulder.

‘Starbucks?’ He said.

‘Call!’ You agreed.

A warm cup of Caramel Frappucino and an Egg Benedict set was your breakfast. Joon’s was a hot Americano and a chocolate brownie.

‘What should we do next?’ You asked before drinking the last of your frappucino. He shrugged. ‘Should we go somewhere.. special?’ He grinned slyly. You raised your eyebrows at him. ‘Lead the way.’ You said, smiling. You loved surprises, anyway.

He brought you to a place near to where your old school was. The buildings there were quite old, mostly brick-walled. He led you down a small alley you’ve never came across. It was a long route, but all the way down there were many graffiti arts by others. Some of them were even 3D. It didn’t take you long to be amused by all of it. You ran your fingers across the drawings on the wall, gasping at the beauty of it.

‘Pretty, aren’t they?’ Joon said softly. You nodded. He stopped in front of a huge black board hanging on the wall. It was filled with colorful writing of chalks. The main title on it was: “I want to _________ before I die.” The colorful writings on the board were answers to the title. ‘Should we write too?’ Joon asked. You grabbed a red colored chalk and started writing. Joon took a white one and wrote too.

You were done with yours. “I want to live happily with no fear or sadness, at least once, before I die.” There was always something negative clinging on to you, as much as you tried to shake it off. Things were starting to change, though, after you’ve met Joon. You looked at where he was writing.

He covered it with his hand, so you couldn’t see what he wrote. ‘Let me see what you wrote~’ You said as you moved towards him. He cutely pouted and covered his words as he shook his head. You pouted too. ‘Fine. Hmph.’ You pretended to be mad and walked away. He ran and catched up with you, hugging you from the back.

‘You can see it the next time you come back here, don’t be angry~’ His attempts to make you happy again were cute with his aegyo voice. You poked his ribs, giggling. ‘Fine. Then.. lets come back here again some other day, together, okay?’ You asked. He didn’t answer you. Instead, he changed the topic.

‘Christmas is in 9 days..’ He said. You nodded, not particularly looking forward to it. He kept quiet for a while after that, like something on his mind was bothering him. After a long time, you broke the silence. ‘It’s getting late soon. You’re tired, aren’t you? Do you want to go home already?’ You asked. He nodded quietly while yawning.

Before the both of you parted ways, he gave you a tight hug. ‘This boy and his skinships.’ You thought, chuckling. ‘And I’m not even his girlfriend.’ You smiled at the thought of being his girlfriend. ‘See you tomorrow?’ Joon asked. You nodded. ‘Promise?’ You said, afraid that he would dump you again. He nodded firmly.

[Joon’s POV]

I’m worried. I’m worried my fingers are able to count the days I have left. I can feel it, really. There’s a time bomb in me, and I don’t have much time left. I don’t want to leave her. I was okay about dying before this, but I can’t.. I can’t just leave her like this.

I have an appointment at the hospital later. I was afraid, for once. In such a long time I’ve lived without fear, the thought of dying struck me again. What will she feel like when she found out that I’ve been hiding my sickness from her all along? What will she feel like when I leave her?

If I had another chance with life, I would’ve chose to ignore her. I shouldn’t have approached her. But now I did, I can’t just pull away. So the last thing I can do.. is this.

It was almost 10 PM when I came back from the hospital. My mom was crying, again. The doctor made it straightforward this time. “He doesn’t have much time left if he doesn’t take any treatment or medicine.” The thought actually came into my mind. The thought of taking the treatment.. just to give me more time. But I doubt it would help. It was too late.

Now.. All I can do is to spend my leftover time with her.