A/N: Thanks for your patience! Here's chapter two of Soohyun's POV, Enjoy!

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I open my eyes, a faint light is streaming through the blinds behind the dimly outlined form of a person at my bedside. Long fingers are running through my hair, my eyes focus on the person in the chair next to my bed.

“Kiseop?” I ask through a yawn,

“Good morning, Soohyun,” he murmurs.

“W-what are you doing up?” I question as I sit up, Kiseop draws his hand away.

“After your nightmare last night Dongho and I stayed here to keep and I on you,” he replies gesturing to his bed behind him. I see the maknae sleeping peacefully on Kiseop’s bed.

“I’m sorry,” I apologize trying to push away the rising images of my nightmare. “I hadn’t meant to worry you.”

“We know,” Kiseop replies with a reassuring smile.

“Have you been sitting in that chair all night just to make sure I could sleep?”

“Of course. It’s what I did before. . .”

I feel guilt tug at me.

            Now Kiseop is going to be tired all day. . . great going. . .

I notice Dongho shifting on Kiseop’s bed. His eyes open, heavy with sleep.

“Hyung, you’re awake,” he says acknowledging me. “Are you feeling better?”

            He must have been worried about me. . .

“I feel a little better,” I answer. “You guys didn’t have to stay up and keep an eye on me.”

“Dongho and I took turns,” Kiseop replies.

“I stayed up for about an hour while Kiseop hyung slept for a bit, then he did the same while I took a break,” Dongho explains leaving Kiseop’s bed to join me in my own.

“We were just worried, Soohyun,” Kiseop admits. “We thought that these nightmares had stopped. It’s been months since the last time this happened.”

“Have you been thinking about him again?” Dongho asks.

            I only started thinking about him again because of Hoon’s confession. . .

“I. . . I started thinking about him a lot yesterday. . .” I confess.

“Why?” Dongho wonders out loud.

I glance at Kiseop, a knowing look on his face.

“It’s because of what he said to you yesterday, isn’t it?” Kiseop asks.

I tear my gaze away from the ulzzang and avoid eye contact with the maknae.

“Because of what who said?” Dongho questions.

“Hoon told me that he likes me. . .” I sigh.

“I don’t understand, hyung,” the maknae says after a brief moment of silence. “Isn’t that a good thing?”

            No, it isn’t! It’ll only cause problems!

I close my hands into fists not daring to look at either man.

“Soohyun thinks that Hoon will hurt him just like Kibum did,” Kiseop replies for me.

“I know he will,” I grumble through clenched teeth. “And I’ll only hurt him.”

“Hyung, that’s not fair,” Dongho states with an edge to his voice. “You can’t go and say that Hoon will be just like Kibum! You haven’t even given him a chance!”

“I know!” I reply harshly, my voice rumbling in my throat much like a growl.

            But I’m scared to take that chance.

My anger ebbs away. Guilt, sadness and regret begin to weigh me down.

“I know. . .” I whisper this time. “But. . . I’m scared to take the chance. . . I don’t want to believe that he’ll hurt me, I really don’t. . . but what more can I expect when every time I love someone all I ever get is pain?”

“That’s just a chance you have to be willing to take,” Kiseop answers.

“Relationships and a lot of other things in life are nothing but a game of chance, hyung,” Dongho adds. “Taking chances is what life throws at you the most, how can you ever expect to be happy if you don’t even try?”

I look at Dongho. His words seem to draw hope from me but I quickly suppress the feeling. I can’t be with Hoon, it’ll only hurt us.

“I don’t know, Dongho,” I answer.

“I say you should give him a chance,” Kiseop murmurs.

“I can tell you like him a lot, hyung,” Dongho says. “Give him a chance, believe that it’ll work and it will,” he smiles. “Give yourself a chance at happiness, too.”

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

“So what do you guys want to do today?”

The maknae’s voice cuts through the silence at the kitchen table. The members were enjoying their breakfast, but I can tell that they are trying not to worry about me. None of them had talked about it, although AJ and Hoon don’t know about Kibum.

            Unless Eli told them. . . But I doubt it, they promised not to say anything to the new members. . .

I let my thoughts wander as I eat a spoonful of cereal.

“Maybe we can go to the amusement park?” Kevin answers Dongho’s question.

“Isn’t it a bit cold to be outside?” Hoon asks.

“It’s supposed to be warmer today,” Eli puts in.

“Sounds like a good idea to me,” AJ replies getting up from the table.

            Amusement park? Dammit, I just want to stay here and forget about everything for the day. . .

“Soohyun?”

“Huh? What?” I stutter regaining my focus.

“I said ‘what do you think?” Kiseop repeats his previously unheard question.

            I have to go, if I don’t they’ll worry again and they won’t be able to enjoy the rest of their weekend off. . .

“Yeah,” I answer with a forced smile. “Sounds like a plan.”

“Alright,” Dongho cheers. “Today’s gonna be fun!”

            Yeah. . . loads of fun. . .

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

“Man, I can’t believe the car broke down. . .” Eli complains.

“At least we can still take the subway so we won’t have to walk so far,” Kevin says to the pigeon.

“Yeah, not like anyone will recognize us,” Kiseop grumbles.

“They’ll only notice Dongho if anything,” AJ comments as we step into the subway train.

“It’s not my fault that I have more fans,” Dongho protests. “Maybe if one of you guys were younger than me then you could be the popular maknae instead.”

“Well, sorry, Dongho. It never crossed my mind to ask my parents to conceive me after 1994,” AJ remarks sarcastically as he and Dongho sit down next to each other.

The two continue their argument as Eli and Kevin sit with Kiseop to Dongho’s left. Hoon sits next to AJ on the rapper’s right. The only spot left is next to the bunny.

            You can’t avoid him forever. . .

I sit down reluctantly. Hoon’s warm body to my left and the cool steel of the seat’s armrest to my right. I try my best to keep distance between our bodies, but there was no room to move. I cross my arms over my chest after putting in one of the earbuds from my MP3 player and switching the device on. I close my eyes attempting to ignore the man next to me.

“Soohyun?” I hear his voice edged with uncertainty and nowhere as cheerful as it usually sounded.

            He’s upset. . .

I open my eyes but I don’t look at him.

“What is it?” I ask, my voice sounding harsher than I had intended it to.

“Are you. . . are you mad at me?” he asks hesitantly as the train begins to move.

            No, of course not. I could never be mad at you, little bunny. . .

“N-no,” I answer in a quiet voice.

“ Then why are you ignoring me? I have this feeling that you’re trying to avoid me,” Hoon says, his voice full of pain.

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” I lie as I remember how I had shrugged him away after his confession.

“Don’t lie to me,” Hoon’s voice is stern.

“I’m sorry,” I murmur. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but it won’t work between us Hoon.”

He remains silent. I dare to look at him, I catch his eyes, they glistened with the look of sadness. Worst of all, he seems hurt by my words.

“We can’t be together,” I sigh.

“Why? Because you’re my leader?” Hoon asks looking away from me. “Because it could ruin our reputation if word got out? If Eli and Kevin can be together then-”

“It’s not because of that,” I interrupt. “It’s because I’ll only hurt you. Whenever I love someone I always end up hurting them. . . and then they hurt me. . .”

“So, you do have feelings for me?” Hoon asks looking back at me, hope flickering in his dark eyes.

I look away from him. I uncross my arms and let my hands rest in my lap as I stare at them idly. I say nothing.

            I won’t ever confess to you what my heart really feels for you. Not ever. It’ll only make things difficult.

But aren’t things already difficult?

“Soohyun,” his voice calls my name again. “Please,” he begins as he rests his right hand over my left. “Tell me the truth.”

“Don’t touch me,” I draw my hand away quickly.

I feel my heart ache.

            I really don’t want to push you away, but it’s for our own good!

Hoon draws his hand away, too. I do my best to hold back my apology. I need to convince him that he needs to find someone else.

“I’m sorry,” Hoon whispers. “I should have kept my feelings a secret,” his voice was beginning to sound strained.

            I have him on the brink to tears. . . I’m so sorry.

“I hadn’t thought that it would affect our friendship like this,” the bunny admits. “Can’t you at least tell me why you’re turning me down like this?” he asks.

I look back at him but he’s looking down at the ground in front of him.

“It would have been easier if you had just said that you don’t feel the same,” he continues as he looks up at me.

I catch his chocolate gaze, mixed emotions darkened his eyes. I feel my heart breaking.

            It wouldn’t have been easier. . .it would have been a lie. . .

“I don’t want to ruin the great relationship we already have,” I murmur. “I don’t want to hurt you, and I can’t take the chance of us hurting each other.”

“Soohyun, I would never hurt you,” Hoon whispers sincerely.

            ‘I won’t ever hurt you, I love you.’

Kibum’s words from the past echo through my head, promising and gentle.

“He said the same thing. . .” I sigh as I look away from Hoon.

“Do you mean Kibum?” he asks.

His question startles me.

            How does he know about Kibum and I?

“What?” I ask looking back at the bunny. “What are you talking about?” I continue hoping that he wouldn’t know about those dark days.

“Kevin told me about how he treated you,” Hoon says answering my unasked question. “That he would hit you and that he mistreated you. You don’t have to hide it from me, Soohyun.”

            Did Kevin tell him about that night, too?

“H-how much did he tell you?” I ask, my hands shaking nervously.

            What if he knows and he hates me for it?

“He told me about how he yelled at you and hit you. There was something else,” I tense and my breath catches as he continues. “-but he wouldn’t tell me what it was, he told me to ask you about it.”

Both of us fall silent. My gaze begins to wander around the train. My hands are still trembling in my lap as I wonder whether or not to tell Hoon about my experience.

            No, if he finds out he’ll hate me for letting it happen. It’s my fault it happened, I should have fought harder, I should have-

“What is it that happened?” Hoon’s voice pulls me back from my racing thoughts.

My mind instantly continues to buzz.

            You can’t let him know! It’ll ruin everything! He’ll lose all respect for you, he’ll never look at you the same way again!

Images of that dreadful night flash through my head. My straining muscles doing all they could to get Kibum off of me. . .the bruises all over my body aching at once, his hurtful words as he took advantage of me. . .my pleas being lost in my screams of pain. . . since that day I have been terrified of being left alone for fear that he would return and do it all over again.

“Soohyun,” Hoon’s voice calls to me again. “Is it that bad?”

I feel his soft hand brushing against my cheek. I realize that he’s wiping away my unnoticed tears.

“It’s. . .it’s terrible,” I answer. “I wish I could just forget about it. . .”

“Will you tell me what happened?”

I purse my lips thoughtfully. I hear the others laughing at AJ and Dongho’s new argument.

            Why can’t I just be happy like them?

“N-no,” I answer Hoon’s question.

The train begins to slow as the intercom sounds announcing the next stop.

“Soohyun, please. Is it because of what happened that you’re pushing me away like this?” he asks as the doors swish open.

“C’mon, guys! Let’s go!” Eli calls to Hoon and I.

“Come on. Let’s not get left behind,” I reply to the bunny ignoring his question.

As we get up and follow the others Hoon leaves my side and goes to Kevin and Eli.

            He’s upset because I won’t tell him. . .

A part of me wants to confide in the kind bunny, but at the same time another part of me fears what will happen if I tell him the truth.

We exit the subway, the other members were chatting away as Kevin spoke with Hoon.

            Don’t you dare say a word to him, Kevin. . .

“Hyung? What’s wrong?” Dongho asks falling into step with me.

“It’s nothing Dongho, don’t worry about it,” I answer.

The maknae rolls his eyes at me detecting my lie. “So have you told Hoon hyung how you feel about him?” he asks in a whisper.

“No.”

“Why not?” he asks. “I swear, if it’s about Kibum. . .”

“I can’t risk it, Dongho,” I reply through gritted teeth.

“Hyung, quit thinking that everything will go wrong, give him a chance. He doesn’t even know about Kibum.”

“He wants to know.”

“Then why not tell him?”

“Because then he’ll hate me! It’ll ruin our friendship if he finds out,” I sigh.

“No it won’t. Hoon is your friend. He won’t judge you or leave you because of something that happened in your past. Especially if it’s something you couldn’t control,” Dongho murmurs.

I look up at the maknae. His eyes glitter with regret.

“I wish I had stayed at home that day, hyung. I wish I could have done something to stop it.”

“I know, Dongho, but all the days you stayed with me, all you did to comfort me afterwards was enough,” I say to the maknae hoping to take away the blame he put upon himself. “Even though you weren’t there to stop Kibum that time you did defend me every other time he tried to hurt me.”

“You’re part of my family, I’ll always be there to help you.”

“Thanks, Dongho,” I murmur, my heart warmed by the maknae’s words.

“Please, hyung,” Dongho says with a small smile. “Give Hoon a chance, you’ll be happy together, I just know it.”

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A/N: That's right, Dongho! CONVINCE HIM! Comment and subscribe for more! Tell me what you guys think of it so far. Also, I posted a one-shot yesterday. It's Soohoon of course. Go and read it. Right MEOW!