(Key POV)

After we’d finally pulled apart, we headed back up to Jonghyun’s room. The house was dark, even though it was day time. The storm just seemed to have made everything outside grey and bleak, causing the same effect of the inside of the place, only more so.

My heart was shattered as I had to watch how Jjong became sadder as the day went on. It was clear from as soon as we left Minnie’s that he wasn’t alright. I could only imagine how hard this was for him to deal with, but what made it worse was that he truly believed he was alone in it all. I just wish he’d realise that he has people in his life that love him so much. Me, Taemin, Minho, even Onew who, even though he only met Jjong once, took an instant liking to him.

It must be so scary for him, to deal with it all on his own. I couldn’t even begin to image how hard it must be to try and live with all of the things he has hanging over his head, and the fact that his Appa blamed him for the death of his own Omma and noona. It’s horrible. But the fact that he believes it as well… it’s just not right.

I want so bad just to help him and make him happy again. When he smiles it’s like my whole world lights up. It’s as though nothing else matters and I’d give anything to see that smile all day long. And when he laughs, it’s like music to my ears. But right now, he won’t smile at all. It’s like he has become numb and doesn’t know how to smile anymore.

“Kibum? Do you want anything to eat or drink, I feel like a bad host” Jonghyun said in the same monotone voice he’d been using all day.

“Ani, I’m fine thanks. You’re not a bad host” I smiled back, trying not to show how sad I was inside, he didn’t need another thing to worry about.

“Then can I ask for something instead?” he said, looking at me shyly from where he was lying on the bed. I was currently sitting on the chair that was at his desk…

“Sure, what it is Jjongie?” I smiled, curious to know where this was going

“Come and lay with me? I want to hold you” he said, and for the first time since we left Taemin’s, he smiled. How could I refuse that – not that I’d want to anyway – if he finally smiled again? And it was a genuine shy smile… I nodded before making my way over to where he was laying and sliding under the thick blanket beside him. Immediately, his arms s their way around my waist, whilst mine found their way to his chest and rested against it. It was becoming second nature, to just become so close like this. “Thanks” he mumbles before placing a soft kiss on my forehead.

“Anytime Jjongie, anytime” I smiled. Oh how I so wished that we could be like this and have it mean more than friendship. I mean, of course I know it did mean more, but I just wish that we were able to define the thing that was going on between us. We loved each other. But we wouldn’t break the barrier to become more than friends, even though it was clear that just friendship wasn’t an option. The lure that pulled us both in was too much to ever ignore and we would always fall under the spell that made us think with our hearts and not out heads.

“I’m really sorry you know”

“For what?” I asked, looking into his deep brown eyes.

“For everything really. I don’t like that I’m stopping us from being together, it’s just that it’s safer that way. I know what happens when I let people in and it never ends well, I can’t… I don’t think I’d be able to carry on with life if I ever lost you Kibum. You mean too much to me to jeopardise everything” he sighed

“Why do you think that I will leave you? How many times do I have to say that will never happen for you to believe me?” I sighed, I want him to realise that there is no way in hell that I would ever leave him. Not ever.

“I want to believe you Kibum… I do, but, it…. It’s just hard for me to accept it when people say that to me. So many people have said that to me in the past but sooner or later they leave without so much as a goodbye. I care about you more than anything and I would hate it if I let myself believe you and then you left because you would take the last piece of my heart with you when you did. It isn’t that I think you’re lying to me or anything… I just, things happen and although you might mean it now, sooner or later you will get fed up of me like all the rest and just go” he sighed, closing his eyes so he no longer had to look into mine.

“I can promise you Jonghyun, I will never get fed up of you. Do you know how long I have been waiting for you? Every day I saw you, under that tree all alone, scribbling away on paper, or just letting the wind run over you, or just singing quietly to yourself, every day I saw you and wanted to come and talk to you but I was afraid you’d push me away. But now I have you in my life, I don’t plan on ever letting you walk out of it. Not now, not ever. Because believe me when I say that I don’t just fall in love with anyone. I’m the almighty Key after all” we both chuckled slightly at my last comment “but in all seriousness. You are the first person I have ever felt this strongly about. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on you, that you were special and how stupid would I be if I just walked away from that?”

As I said those words, I couldn’t help but think of that poem… the one he’d written the day he saved that young girl from the bullies. He was truly one of the most amazing people to grace this earth and I know for a fact, if his Omma was here today, she would be so very proud of him. As would his noona and his Appa. He has been through so much and I bet he has yet to tell me half of it, it still amazes me just how strong he is. I would have never been able to cope with even a fraction of what he has had to deal with.  He really deserved so much more than all of this. More than me, but I was too selfish to let him go. I needed him to stay with me.

“It’s easy, you just walk and never look back. You’d probably be better off that way, I wouldn’t hold it against you if you did. You’d be able to have a better life without me dragging you down” he said quietly, almost in a whisper. How could he really think that?

“Ani. My life would be nothing if I lost you now. Before you, my life was fine, I was happy, had a few good friends, nice family, but now, now that I have you I can see what I’ve been missing all those years and I can’t just go back to that. Without you, my life would be boring and not worth anything. And I don’t care how cheesy or cliché this sounds, but you seriously do complete me in a way that nobody else can. Nothing and nobody could compare to the happiness you make me feel” I could feel myself blushing as the words left my mouth.

I wasn’t one for being open about how I felt, unless I was talking to Taemin, but he’s my best friend so that makes sense. I know that opening up to people can just leave you bitter and hurt and it was embarrassing to top it all off. But I knew that with Jonghyun, I could be myself and not live in fear that I would be judged for it. I know I act all strong and ‘diva’ like but in all honesty, it was just a front to make people think that I was strong when I wasn’t. Strong, that would be the definition of the boy lying by my side. He was strong, beyond belief.

“Are you blushing?” he chuckled and tapped my nose with his index finger “Aigoo, my little Kibum is blushing~ who would have thought that the almighty Key would be embarrassed to share his feelings”

“Yah, shut up” I pouted at his, only making him chuckle again. It was nice to see him not only smile but laugh lightly. I would do anything to hear that noise over and over until it was permanently etched into my brain.

“Mainhae Kibummie” he grinned, which told me he wasn’t sorry in the slightest. Not that I minded but oh well, at least he was smiling again.

“I’m sleepy” I yawned.

“That was so random” Jjongie laughed at me, rolling his eyes slightly.

“I know” I beamed.

“Go to sleep then babo” he said, getting more comfortable “I could use a few hours myself”

With that we both drifted off for a few hours.

*Two days later*

(Jonghyun POV)

Finally! Praise the lord! Hallelujah!! The electricity is back on and the storm has stopped!! Wooooooo~ and we didn’t have to go school for three days, oh yeahhhhhh!!! Okay, that was me being way too happy… weird…

So here I was dancing around the middle of the living room like a fool with Kibum laughing at me from the sofa – not the one my Appa had been on, that one had been thrown out when the rain stopped, we’d managed to get the old one down from the loft. That was…. Fun – with tears streaming down his face from laughing too much.

“Stop laughing at meeee!” I whined, coming to sit down next to him, his hair was still damp from the shower he’d just taken. I had to say though, he looked adorable in a pair of my old jeans (Don’t worry, they were three-quarter lengths so they fit him alright, well the waist was a little bit big n him but hey ho) and my dark blue basketball vest.

“How can I stop when you’re dancing around like that?” he giggled, aigoo, so cute!

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m going to shower~ be back soon Bummie” I kissed his cheek quickly before running off to the washroom.

I quickly undressed and stepped into the shower, letting the water run over me.

It was nice, to be in a good mood for once. My nightmares were still happening, but I didn’t find them scary anymore, ani, I found them annoying. I needed to figure out who the hell that man was. He was the same man from my Omma and noona’s funeral, I knew it. But I needed to work out how he fit in with all of this. What did he mean when he said that it was him all along but I’d get blamed? Urgh, what was I thinking, it was just a dream.

Once I’d finished in the shower I walked back to my room with a towel around my waist, water droplets falling from my hair onto my shoulders as I did. To my surprise I found Kibum sitting on my bed reading one of my books. ‘The Hunger Games’ – That book is awesome and anyone who disagrees should not be on this planet because it is the best book ever and it is just amazing and sure the film is good too but the books are soooooooo much better.

“What are you doing up here?” I asked, as I walked in, closing the door behind me.

“I got bored all on my own” he pouted, folding his arms across his chest.

“I was gone for like… ten minutes…” I raised an eyebrow “I think someone just wanted to catch me in a towel…” I winked at him before walking over to my dresser and pulling out a pair of boxers and some socks. I placed them on my bed and walked over to my chest of draws and got out a pair of black jeans and a purple tee with a ‘nerdasaurus’ on it~

“Yeah, sure Jjong. If you want to believe that~” he giggled, then added “Why do you have Pikachu on your boxers?”

“Because it makes them awesome! Duh!” I grinned “Now, either go wait downstairs or you’re going to have to watch me get dressed”

“I’ll stay” he winked

“Seriously?” I raised an eyebrow, this should be fun…

“Deh, I’ll close my eyes though” he giggled and squeezed his eyes shut.

“Fine, fine, but no peaking!” I rolled my eye and began to get dressed, once I had on my underwear and socks I chuckled and told him I didn’t mind if he looked now.

“You could have told me you were only in your underwear!” he scolded me, only making it more funny

“Mainhae, but it isn’t a big deal”

“Aish, whatever just get dressed you babo Dino!”

“What are we doing today anyway? Minho text me saying that school is staying closed until Monday” I smiled at him, pulling on my jeans as I did.

“We could go hang out at my house. I kind of need to go home anyway, I need clothes” he sighed

“And I’m sure your parents are wondering where you are” I added, which to my shock made him laugh

“They probably didn’t even realise I was gone”

“Oh… Well, I have an idea. Why don’t we go to yours, and invite Minnie, Minho and Onew over and we can have like a sleepover?” I suggested. It was kind of sad that his parents didn’t even know he wasn’t their…

“Jjongie, that’s a great idea!”

With that we got ready and headed over to Kibum’s house. Once there he text Minnie and Onew and asked them to come over.

Onew agreed and said he would be here in an hour, and Taemin said he and Minho would be here in about two hour because they had to stop by Minho’s house first.

I was actually looking forward to seeing them all again. And I had to admit, I thought I would get annoyed having another person around me all the time, but for some reason, with Kibum I kind of hoped it would never have to end.

It’s funny how things worked out sometimes.

Maybe for one, I did have something good going for me and maybe, just maybe, this time it was for keeps.

Well, either way, there was no turning back now…

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A/N: Yaaahhh!!! Jjongie~ Let Key love you!!! -she says when she is the one writing the angst.... awkward-

Haha, anyways~ Hey guysssss!!! I'm sorry if my updates become a little less often for a while, there are two reasons,

1) It's christmas and I have to deal with family and shopping and helping out around the house and all that chizzzzz~

2) I am ill as FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU xD like seriously, I'm dying!!!! T^T but because i love you guys sooooo much, i managed to get this update done :D

Well, as per usual, I must apologise if their are any mistakes or type-o's. I would have checked but my head hurts T^T *bows* sorry guys

Comment and let me know what you think ne? Silent readers, Y U NO COMMENT?! You know you wanna ;D hehehe love you really ^.^

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Until next time

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