"When you fall in love, you cannot directly say you are in love. You need to feel longing, want and need from this one you love. And then that's when you know this person, is someone special. I love this person. After the confirmation, comes the sacrifices; it becomes I hate this person.. But you sooner come back to a circle of need, longing, want and love. Thus, I love this person so much." 

LOSER'S LIFE 103

 Holding on to my back pack walking with a slight smile. I kinda feel good today, ever since last night. I wanna see Ms. Jung, my English teacher. But I have to go to my Korean History class first. I totally can't wait to see her!

 "Hey loser, what happen to detention?" Oh it's my jockey classmate, Taecyeon. The cool guy, asking me what happen in detention. Why would I tell you? It's for me and her only, gossip king.

 "Nothing." I replied, avoiding any eye contact from him and his laughing crew. Bunch of air heads, they think they run the school just because they have muscles. I can run the school, like our fat principal does. He can run the school with his body why can't I?!

 "I bet she made you write in the blackboard thousands of apologies. Loser!" Now it's Hara, his girlfriend. Whatever, she did not. Actually she answered my accidental question. And the answer is red. "Nope." I sat down to my usual seat and flew to my doodle world once again. I can hear my classmates' noises but I seem to have the special ability to ignore them. Maybe I'm used to it. I'm Im Yoon. Immune get it? Okay corny.

 I'll doodle Ms. Jung. She's pretty and cute. Then me, tall and cute Yoona. Don't we look cute? I wonder what Ms. Jung sees in me.. Am I cute? Kekek insert Yoona aegyo face.

 My morning classes are the usual boring. I'm quite hungry, can we go yet Mr. Sung? You teach history without any energy that the class ends up sleeping. I mean you're talking about Korean history heroes but only you can hear your stories. Hello? Ms. Sung! People in the back need education so louder please! Geez. Teachers..

 Now that I think of it, Ms. Jung is better than him. Ms. Jung teaches everyone English very good, I might even speak American one day. How do you do my good man? Hehe. I said that in English.

 Lunch time, finally! I rushed and ran towards the cafeteria. I'm so hungry. I wonder if Ms. Jung already ate lunch? Maybe I should bring her something to eat.

 As I fall in line to buy a cresent for me and Ms. Jung, I heard two students talk about her.

 "Hey, have you seen the new teacher?"

 "The sizzling hot teacher?! Man, her students are lucky." We are lucky. Especially me.

 "Rumors she's single. She looks young, why don't we try?" Oh no you don't shorty! This dwarf guy thinks he has chances on Ms. Jung?! Think again!

 But still.. It made me think, am I the only student whom Ms. Jung had with? It kinda hurt to think if I ain't the only one. I hope I am.

 I walked away from the counter with my bread, to try and find my English teacher. I really wanna see yo-

 "Where to loser?" Uhg. My face almost hit the floor. Damn you, Nickhun. He's one of Taecyeon's friends. He's the school's basketball star player and he just tripped me. Yes he did and he's not even the slightest guilty. "Loser's going to eat alone.. Awee." Whatever, I stood up ignoring the kings and queens laughing at me. I dusted off my clothes, I can hear the whole cafeteria laugh. Why so?

 I looked down and I saw ketchup stain on my stomach. Okay, very funny prank Nickhun. As if you wash my clothes. Ignore them Yoona, ignore. But I'm so pissed! This kids bully me like I'm a magnet which attracts them and I didn't even do anything to make them do this.

 "That's it." I'm ready, I'll take them all on! Like batman or superman, I can do this.

 "You okay?" Someone tapped my shoulder from the back. Everyone suddenly became silent. I turned to look who, its Ms. Jung. "Y-yes.." I can't speak.

 "Here.." She bended down and grabbed the bread I dropped from my fall. She then left the cafeteria. Thank you Ms. Jung. Take that kings and queens! Feel the wrath of a goddess! And now I need to follow her..

 She's making her way back to the faculty I guess. I ran up to her on the hallway. "Ms. J-Jung! Wait!" She stopped.

 "Yoona?" She looked at me. Oh so beautiful baby face.

 "I-I-I bo-bought y-you some fo-ood." I'm quite nervous, around her that is. "Oh.. Thank you." She grabbed the bread, she looked more beautiful without make up but Ms. Jung was still marvelously beautiful even with it.

 She turned around to the direction to the faculty once more. All she said was thank you? Nothing else? I kinda wanted more. She stopped and faced me again, but the distance is three or four steps away.

 "What are you standing there for?" She asked. I didn’t answer back, actually I don't know. She approached me, looking around our surroundings.

 "Look, Yoona.. About last night, there's no me and you relationship okay? Just for fun. You get that right?" She told me. I simply nod my head up and down. Yea, I remember now. You said it was for fun.

 "And what happens in my house stays there okay?" She tapped my arm. I nod my head once again. She smiled.

 "See you in my class. Bye Yoona." She walked away and walked inside the faculty. Geez. I stand there kinda hurt. I guess it was my fault though, I believed that somehow there was something but there wasn't. But I didn't think about a relationship with her, just.. Plain friends. Because I don't have one. Get over it Yoona.. Life goes on.

 I didn't care if students will laugh or feel concerned about the large ketchup stain on my uniform. I was simply sad or rather disappointed. Back to my loser seat in class. There goes my classmates laughing at me again.

 "What's wrong Yoona? Zombie ate your stomach?" Shut up Taecyeon! I don't need your teasing not today. Not ever! "Wait wait, I thought Yoona's boyfriend is a zombie. Did he eat you Yoona? I bet you liked that!" Now they’re all laughing. Will you guys take a break on the laughing on me for a day? I'm sick of this! Ugh! Stop it.

 I hid in my arms, laying my head on my desk. I feel so unlucky. What did I do to deserve such an environment? Did god really hate me this much? Geez. Yoona Im, you could just die and I bet no one will care. No one will even cry. They'll laugh or won't even bother.

 "Good afternoon class!" My English teacher spoke in English. I don't care, I'll be fine under my arms.

 "Good afternoon Ms. Jung." Stupid classmates. Suddenly becoming angels when Ms. Jung is around.

 "Hey, Yoona what's wrong?" Just let me be.

 "Loser, Ms. Jung's calling you." I said let me be, okay?

 "Yoona, is there a problem?" Ms. Jung asked, clearly it's her voice. You shouldn't care. There is no me and you remember? "If you wanna sleep in my class better not attend it." I'm not sleeping.

 Ms. Jung resumed teaching while I was on my own world. I imagined playing war craft, I imagined me as Korea's no. 1 war craft player. Crowds cheered me on, and boom! I defeated the enemy team! My teammates treat me a hero and this time I can call the other team.. Losers.

 I'm a total loser. Ms. Jung is the exact opposite. It’s like Batman and Joker. No I'm more of Two Face than Joker.. I'm a sore loser.

 I got home and I got another scolding from my mother, about my uniform that is. I washed it. Afterwards I retreated back to my paradise, my room.

 Looking up the ceiling again, I'm tired of thinking about Ms. Jung. I'll play Silent Hill later on. I just hope I don't get nightmares from it.

 The week remained the same. Me as the loser kid and others are the bullies, normal kids and nerds. Very exciting week. Very ty week. Ms. Jung and I didn't talk anymore. But I kinda regret that I gave up something special to her. Then again, it's already in the past.

 "Yoona.. Hey.." Walking out of the class, Ms. Jung called me. "Sunday okay?" She said. Okay Sunday.. I don't want to. "No.." She frowned, what? Can't I refuse?

 "But why?" Your asking me why? I can’t do with you English teacher Jung!

 "I don't feel it." I turned away. No more Ms. Jung find another student who wants to be your toy. I'm over and done with the game.  Even if we had it for only once and no I don't regret! But I kinda regret a little not seeing her not in her Ms. Jung form. What is her name anyways? 

 Home, playing my Final Fantasy 13, the RPG of Lighting chic. I enjoyed her character kinda cold and blunt, powerful bad-. Maybe I should be like her sometimes but then again maybe Ms. Jung fits her more.

 "Yoonaa!" Moms calling down stairs. "What?!"

 "Come down here!"

 Geez. I'm busy!

 Wh-what the?!

 "Your beautiful English teacher here tells me she'd tutor you for free. Ms. Jung oh thank you very much!" Mom don't do this. "Now go to her house! Be back by 11 okay?" Mom how can you push me off with a stranger! Well not exactly but how can you do this to your daughter! You don't know anyth- Slaaam! My mother slammed our door.. Great just great.

 "Now shall we go Yoona?"

 "How did you know where I lived?" Are you some stalker Ms. Jung? Maybe you are.

 "I have a record of your personal address, I'm your teacher, remember?" Fine. You’re not a stalker but you’re a beautiful psycho -maniac. "Now let’s go." She took my wrist but I struggled. I stood there still.. I don't want to Ms. Jung.

 "What's wrong Yoona?" She turned to ask me.

 "Why?" Why Ms. Jung? Why should I come with you?

 "You agreed to me. Every Sunday, remember?" Oh sharp memory. But no Ms. Jung not today not the next Sunday not ever! "Not now." Be like Lighting, Yoona.

 "Okay then. Just tell me one thing.."

 "Tell me you don't want me.." What kind of question is that?! Clearly I don’t want you. Hey hey hey! D-don’t come close! T-thats a foul! "Tell me you don't want Jessica Jung and I'll let you go." Jessica? That's your name?! Oh no. Don’t stare at me like that. Those seducing lips, beautiful face, smooth skin. , Yoona resist! Resist it all!

 No I can't. Jessica Jung.. How can win against you? With you, I'm a sore loser.

  Poor Yoona.. Or not? 

I will update on Monday or Teusday, I will be quite busy these upcoming weekends so you guys need to bear with me okies? :3

-choikufu