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CHAPTERONE

❝WISHESCANBERISKY❞

Woohyun crouched down, placing a bouquet of flowers next to a headstone.

Chrysanthemums.

They were his mother’s favorites.

It had been a blustery day: the day of his mother’s funeral. Not too many people came for the service, barely any. It was just Woohyun, a few of his mother’s neighbors, and a small group of nurses that took care of Suji in the hospital after she grew ill. They were all gone now, though. It was just Woohyun now.

He gently pushed the bouquet of flowers against the grave, hoping that it wouldn’t fly away in the wind. Woohyun couldn’t really pinpoint how he felt at the moment. He was gravely upset that his mother was gone, completely and utterly out of his life. But he was also relieved at the same time. Not because she was a nuisance or because they never really got along, but because she didn’t have to suffer anymore. He didn’t like to see his mother in constant pain, so when he heard the heart monitor's flat line, he just idly stood by the side, mentally bidding his mother goodbye one last time.

Woohyun was also extremely upset over the fact that his older brother didn’t come. He knew there was a very, very small chance that he would, but Woohyun kept hoping that Boohyun, his brother, would put aside his differences with his mother and at least visit her grave. Woohyun’s relationship with his mother was nothing compared to the relationship between his mother and brother. They always fought over the littlest of things. His mother always said he got his arguing skills from their father.

The arguments got so bad between the two that one day when Woohyun came home from school–he was in middle school while Boohyun just recently graduated from high school–all of his brother’s things were gone. It was as if he had never lived there in the first place. He found his mother sitting alone in the kitchen crying. Not long after he left, Woohyun and Suji would start to argue over little things as well, though they would make up in the end.

Boohyun would sometimes visit, only to see how Woohyun was doing, and sometimes he would take him out for dinner or just a fun trip to the mall. However, at the end of the day, he would drop Woohyun off back at home and leave again, not even muttering a single word to Suji.

On one of those very visits while Woohyun was complaining about the recent argument he had with his mother, his brother asked Woohyun if he would like to live with him. Woohyun was surprised at the offer. He never knew where Boohyun lived–he assumed not too far if he was willing to drive everywhere.

Woohyun was only sixteen when Boohyun asked that. He actually wouldn’t mind living with him, but he couldn’t just leave his mother, right? He loved his mother, and he always told himself he would never leave her like how his father and brother did. He wouldn’t suddenly die from an aneurysm and leave his family like his dad did, and he wouldn’t get completely fed up with his mom and move out without a word like his brother did. Woohyun didn’t have the heart to do that to his mom. She was already alone as it is.

And Woohyun told his brother just that, declining his offer. Boohyun bitterly smiled at him and remained quiet for the rest of the day. That evening when he dropped Woohyun off at home, he tightly hugged Woohyun and told him he loved him and that he would always be there for him. Then he left like always.

But it wasn’t like always, though.

Boohyun never came back. He never heard his older brother’s voice again. Woohyun tried calling him, asking his brother’s friends if they’ve seen him, but no one has. It was almost as if Boohyun never existed in the first place.

Or how Suji would say, “It’s almost as if he fell into a wormhole and time traveled.”

Woohyun stood up, dusting the invisible dirt off of his pants. He raised his arms into the air, stretching them up above. He noticed that the sky was starting to turn a pale tint of orange, indicating that the sun was setting.

He bid goodbye to his mother’s grave one last time and left.

“Dude, I’m sorry for your loss,” someone apologized. Woohyun stopped cleaning the countertop and turned around. His boss, Eli Kim, was standing there, frowning slightly. His eyes shone with pity and remorse.

“Nah, it’s okay. She has been sick for a while,” Woohyun turned back around and continued cleaning. “At least her suffering is over.” He rubbed the same spot on the counter over and over again.

Eli ran a hand through his spikey blond hair, sighing lightly. He has been watching his employee scrub that same spot for a while now. There’s absolutely no way that that spot could still be dirty. It’s also absolutely obvious that Woohyun was still mourning for his mother.

“Go home, Woohyun.”

“What? Why?” Woohyun turned back to Eli incredulously.

“You’re creating an extremely dark and depressing atmosphere.”

“How? I’m just doing my job!” Woohyun crossed his arms; his eyebrows furrowed at the accusation.

“This is a coffee shop, Woohyun. Your job is to make coffee and/or some desserts in the back.” He pointed to the rag in Woohyun’s hand, “Not to clean the same damn spot for two hours.”

“But–”

“Go home.”

“Please–”

“Woohyun, your mom just died a few days ago. You need to take time to mourn her.”

“I am!”

“Don’t do it here!” Eli complained.

“Why?”

“Just look around, Woohyun. This is a coffee shop. This place is usually loud and lively,” Eli gestured to his shop.

Woohyun surveyed the shop. Eli was right. Everyone was quiet, looking somberly. The lights seemed a bit dimmed too, giving off a gloomy ambience, even his other co-workers looked morose. Woohyun grew quiet as he realized that Eli was right. His depressing attitude was making the shop and everyone else look slightly glum.

He turned back to his boss, “Who’s going to take over my shift?”

“I’ll get Kevin or Kiseop to do it.” Woohyun nodded and took off his apron. He gave his rag to Eli and walked into the back room of the coffee shop to gather his things that were in his locker. He stuffed his apron into it and grabbed his bag. He glanced at the mirror inside during the process.

He looked like a mess. His short brown hair was all over the place–

Why didn’t anyone mention that I looked terrible today?!

–He had dark circles under his eyes. Speaking of eyes, they were blood shot. He hadn’t really been getting a lot of good sleep since Suji died. Woohyun frowned. He gently ran his fingers through his tousled hair.

“Woohyun,” he heard his boss call him fro