Choi seunghyun

4^th May 2003

“C U later. Same spot ok.” It was a text from Seoul.

I’m not sure why I’m even following this but ever since that night, the night when I accidentally knocked her and allowing her to sleep beside me at that little budget hotel room. The way her warmth was felt during that breezy night of May, I just know by heart that this girl is special. Her appearance may be cold but the way she touches someone’s heart just by that blank stare, no one could do that. No one.

I know this is a crazy decision, but I’m in the game. I want to meet her so badly, and if I found her to be different than the girl who I met last year, then I’ll just buy a new phone number and hope that she’s in no way a psycho stalker who would follow me all the way to Busan.

I set up my bag with clothes enough for one night stay. I told Mom that I’m going out with my friends to Seoul, but weirdly, she didn’t ask me who were my ‘friends’, she was just glad that I’m finally getting out of my room.

The bus trip to Busan took me a five hours drive, plus another hour to find the right subway and the right train to actually get to that place in Myungdeong; the hospital. It was really weird how she wants us to meet at such an unappealing place, as I say, she is a bit special, and in the way she thinks of course.

After that midnight of Children’s Day in 2002, the only thing we left with each other was our phone number and since that, we have contacted each other, sending text messages about everything we do, every day. I enjoyed talking to her, she seems to be a better listener than most of my bros. And just as my sign of thanking her, I should really work hard to meet her and endure my long journey to Seoul.

I was finally there, the same spot that we have agreed to meet. But it was only five in the evening and I still have lots of time until meeting her. I took the chance to look around Myungdeong just like what I did a year ago.

Seoul is changing rapidly. Just one year had passed since I’ve been here, but even the hotel that I’ve rent was no longer standing, it was demolished to give way for new developments. More fancy cafes are standing proud, with fancy canopies out just in time for the upcoming summer. I heard that cafes are the ‘it’ for youths in Seoul. But in Busan, there was only one coffee shop that matters. The coffee shop was located near my house, they serve the most satisfying coffee and it was my favorite place to just hang and read a book. I was considered weird because my peers were always busy at cyber cafes playing computer games while I’m here with a copy of writers like Chekov. My classmates barely knew any writers, even famous ones like Dickens.

Since last year, my interest on video games went way down, my extreme fondness to Final Fantasy was blown away bits by bits and I was attracted to literature. It was simply not the in-trend for teenagers my age, sometimes I feel ashamed of my own generation who simply can’t appreciate work of art like these.

It was my only space to create my imagination, be in the world that I can’t be in the real world. Seoul likes to ask me about the books I read. I am currently in the process of finishing Anton Chekov’s ‘Sakhalin Island’. It was not my cup of tea but I had always liked Chekov’s way of explaining things around him.

I can imagine her asking me a few questions on ‘Sakhalin Island’ and I always had imaginative answers for her. If she asks me to borrow the novel, I would give it to her immediately, those were my thoughts.

After much debate with myself deciding on what to eat, I settled down on a simple Ramyun and tea in this little restaurant which was part secluded from the main street where there was endless lines of stores and shopping places. Before I know it, it was already 9PM. Seoul and I had agreed on meeting at 9.30PM. After paying for the food, I quickened my pace towards our meeting place.

My feet were trembling when I reached around the last corner before the hospital. Even my heart felt like it was jumping up and down, knowing Seoul will be right in front of my eyes in a couple of moments. I took several deep breaths and stabilized my steps, and there she was. The girl with no name.

She looked a hundred times prettier than the last time I saw her. Her bangs were pretty much the same as the first time, but the hair that hid her face that night was pulled back and tied into a ponytail. Her chubby cheeks and big eyes were glowing and she greets me with the shiniest smile I’ve ever seen.

It was not the first time I saw her smiling, she did smile when we said our goodbyes last year, but this time, it was beyond words. Maybe this is what people say, ‘there’s always a goddess stuck on earth’. She’s gorgeous.

“Busan! Long time no see,” those were her first reaction of seeing me. “did you have any trouble coming here?” “Nope. But Seoul changed, a bit.” “Yeah, I know right? One day the public toilet is over here, the next day, it’s gone. I get a little annoyed at the fact I had to spend half an hour just to find a toilet here.” I laughed at her joke. “Have you eaten?” Should I mention that I’ve already ate one big bowl of Ramyun? “No. Have you?” I lied. “Well then, let’s go to this one ramyun restaurant that I liked.” “Ramyun.” I echoed. “Come!”

She grabbed my hands and got through the growing crowds in the streets of Myungdeong. I was not aware of the streets and the stores but after 10 minutes of walking, we ended up in front of the same Ramyun restaurant that I went to in the evening. Crap.

The food was nice, but it was nice for a once-in-a-night occasion. Little did I know that Seoul actually liked this restaurant. “They have the best, and I mean the BEST ramyun around. They don’t have stuffs like this in the area of my house. I’ll come here every week for this.” She said. “Really? Where’s your house at?” “Gangnam-gu.” “Wow, Gangnam-gu? Isn’t that where rich people resides?” she laughed at my statement. “You silly boy. Yep, that is where rich people build their bungalows and . But I live in this ugly apartment on the edge of Gangnam. Just lucky enough that I have ‘Gangnam-gu’ in my address but the area of Gangnam where I live in is basically for peasants. Sometimes I boast around to people too. They would ask ‘Where do you live?’ and I’m like, ‘Gangnam .’ And they all bow to me. Humans are funny in that way.” We continued to laugh while waiting for the waiter to take our orders.

The waitress turns out to be the same one that served me earlier. She looked like she’s in her thirties, and her appearance was too well cared for to be a waitress at a second grade ramyun restaurant. “Two ramyun and colas for us please. Busan, do you want anything else?” “Um-” “Hey, you’re that kid earlier right? You sat in that corner.” The waitress suddenly spoke while her index finger pointed at the most far corner of the restaurant. “Busan-ah, you’ve been here?” Seoul asked. “Pretty much, um, yes.” Seoul laughs a moment later. “Why didn’t you tell me? You said you haven’t eaten.” “Well, I didn’t know you’re going to bring me to the same restaurant.” She continues to laugh. Her laugh was sort of cartoon-ish which I found to be cute. She then went back to the waitress, “then, let’s cancel the ramyun, we’ll stick with the cola, thanks.” As she canceled the food, I asked her, “Aren’t you eating?” “Actually, I just ate at school, they were having some pot-luck feast for Children’s Day. We’ll eat supper later if you want.” After finishing our colas, we walked out of the restaurant and continued to talk.

Time flies faster than I expected, and the midnight of Children’s Day had come. Children staying up beyond their bedtime came with their parents to witness the abundant firework displays to celebrate Children’s Day tomorrow. Huge colorful ballons along the streets, as if not just celebrating Children’s Day, but also celebrating our night together. Busan and Seoul.

After a quick supper at the nearest convenient store, it was time for bed. Even when I have already planned this trip for weeks ago, I didn’t get to book a room to stay. Blame my parents for not subscribing to the internet, and blame me for being stupid enough to not go to the cyber café to book a room online.

“Where’s the nearest hotel? The one I stayed last year was no longer there.” “Told you Seoul’s changing fast,” she said with a laugh. “I also don’t know the area here. This is not my area. Hey, the night’s still young and yet you already feel like sleeping?” she said. “Yeah, my bedtime already passed.” “Come on, let’s have a little more fun. I’m bored. And it’s not like we meet each other every day. Come on! Let’s have fun!” “Convince me to follow you.” I said.

“Ok, you said that the only lights in Seoul’s sky are from airplanes and helicopters right?” I gave a little nod. “Well, you are so wrong. Let me take you to this place. You can see real stars.” “Fine, I’m on. But after that, promise me you’ll go home. I’m a guy, I can take care of myself and no one wants to me, but you’re a girl, and it is safer for you to be home after midnight, it’s already two in the morning.” “Fine! Jeez, you sounded like my late Mom.” “Your late what?” She didn’t answer me.

We took a U134 bus, heading to someplace that was uncommon to me or any visitor from Busan. From the busy streets of Myungdeong, we were heading to a sleek neighborhood, is this the so-called ‘Gangnam’? “Welcome to Gangnam-gu, ‘the home of the rich and famous.’” Seoul said, with a mimic of Busan accent. “But sadly this is not my area either. Haha.” I just smiled at her and continued with gazing the road.

…

“Gangnam High School for Girls? Why on earth are we here?” Seoul laughs while clapping both of her hands as exaggerations. “This is my school you fool.” “Then why are we here?” I asked. “To see real stars.”

I followed her way to this narrow path beside that school, on the end of a path was a ruined wired gate and she leads me to get inside the school by that little hole on the gate. Mischievous high school girls vandalizing the school’s gate, nothing new, they do it even in Busan. We ran like two little thieves through the school’s courtyard to this small building that reads ‘Girls’ Dorms’. “You’re taking me inside?” I asked her, “Yep! Why not?” “Don’t you have any guards or something? I mean, if I get caught maybe I’m unable to get back to Busan tomorrow.” “So? Isn’t that a good thing?” “Well, it is in some way but my Mom will find out I went all the way to Seoul to meet a girl.” Seoul just smiled. “Don’t worry, there are no students left. Maybe one or two groups of foreign student but they don’t really mind. Come on! Don’t be such a sissy!”

The girl’s dorm was not as classy as I thought it would be. I imagined very neat hallways, clean and sweet-scented rooms and bras hanging. I was only right about the bras.

The dorm was funny-scented. It was either because of the different perfumes that the girls wear or the dorm was just insanitary. Ramyun noodle cups were everywhere along the hallway and shoes were not on their racks. It was pretty much like boy’s dorm, like my neighbor, Jiyong’s dorm but instead they have bras hanging literally everywhere.

I wish Jiyong could see this right now. Me entering some girl school’s dorm. He was always the one with the erted sense. He and this other junior of mine named Seungri.

I cleaned my thoughts about my juniors back in Busan and concentrated on this girl with no name. She was walking with her back straight, confident in her strides as if she’s walking down a runway in Paris when she’s only casually walking to her room in this funny-scented hallway.

“C 1.4, we’re here!” she said as we were standing on a yellow-colored door with a big blue notice board. The notice board looks as weird as seeing two moons in the sky. The size was obviously too big to be hanged on the door but none of that matters anyway, I’m seconds away from walking into a girl’s room, seconds before that, I had just entered a girls’ dorm. Who knows what will happen next. 

She drops her baby blue Westpak backpack on her study table and without hesitation climbed on the top of a little double-bunk bed. “My bed is up here, Sandara’s is down there.” She said as she points the bed underneath the one she has settled in. I took a look around the room, her pin board, pictures of her and an older woman, possibly her Mom. Pictures of her and her friend, this ‘Sandara’ girl. But no names, nothing that points to her name. No notebooks were lying on top of the table. No nametags. Looking through her stuffs makes me look like a psycho so I stopped looking near the study table and proceed to the opened window which I noticed to be directly opposite her bed.

“No stars,” I said. “Not yet.” She answers. “Come up here and join me, I’ll show you where the stars are, you cannot see them from down there.” I turned around and looked at her. Seconds later I start climbing the stairs of her little bunk bed.

Both of us sat closely to each other, shoulders nearly touching. “Sometimes when I can’t sleep I will sit like this. I’ll open the curtain and let the lights come in. Sometimes Sandara will be annoyed because she likes to sleep in a dark room but she never really confront me about it so I just open the curtain anyways.” She then continued “It’s a surprise when you can’t see the sky when you’re down from the bed but when you’re up here, you can see the stars. Clearly.” She did a little expression with her hands to describe the night sky.

“Close your eyes.” She said, and I immediately followed her instructions. She placed her palm on top of my eyes and seconds later she let go. “Open them now.” She commanded. And as if she has some magical powers, there they are, the stars, looking so proud as always, shining like artificial Christmas lights.

We sat there saying nothing and just stare at the stars. She later held my hands in hers and closes her eyes. Seconds later, little breaths start to come out from and she was sound asleep. Having no troubles, I also fell asleep the second I close my eyes.

…

9AM. I said to myself as I read my watch. I was still lying on the bed of this beautiful girl in Gangnam School for Girls’ dorm. Next to me was the girl with no name, still sleeping silently beside me. The opened window let in a huge amount of light and it casted a shadow on the girl’s body. I grabbed her shoulder and bring it to mine and smelled her hair. There was still flowery scent on Seoul’s hair and I inhaled some more of the scent while admiring the shape of her curves. She was still sound asleep.

My eyes were closing again when she suddenly turns her back around and faced me. She looked at me with a smile. “Good morning.” She said. “Ohayogozaimasu” I answered while she’s still smiling. Both of us got down from the double-bunk bed and get ourselves ready for another day in Seoul.

We took another bus, and this time it was the T20 bus heading to central Itaewon. Seoul decided that it was best for us to go relaxing in a public bath there before going back to Myungdeong to send me off.

…

There was no difference between Busan’s bath house and Seoul’s. Probably the ONLY difference was that you know basically everyone in the bath house back in Busan. Here, people don’t even talk to each other. There was either old businessman busy scrubbing themselves or young couples stealing nervous kisses. I met Seoul in the hot sauna room after showering in the male bath.

She looked really y in the heavy-looking t-shirt. She was drenched in sweat as she arrived a lot sooner in the hot sauna room. I joined her lying in the room and took a sip of herbal water that I bought earlier.

“I used to go here with my Mom.” She said. “Your Mom, where is she? Everyone else is back home for Children’s Day but why are you here?” She turns her body around and now lying on the floor with her chest in contact with the concrete floor. “Do you remember the first time we met?” “Yeah, 4^th of May 2002. I knocked you down accidentally on that street near Myungdeong’s hospital.” “My Mom died that night, on the midnight of Children’s Day. The night when I met you near the hospital.” Silence followed. No wonder she looked so blunt that night. Her stare of nothingness. It was because of her mother. Now everything makes sense.

“That’s why you wanted to stay with me.” I said. She nodded. “I have no one in this world. My parents are divorced, my father got remarried to his previous wife and resumed his life in Jeju-do. The only ones left in Seoul is me and my mom. Other than that, I have no other family.”

We continued the talk about her family and also spilled out a bit about mine. I’m 18, a high school senior with no big dreams. I have a younger sister who’s a bit retarded (not literally) and an eccentric father while my mom was pretty much normal as anyone else’s. I guess. After a quick brunch at a café near the public bath house, we took another bus to central Myungdeong to say our goodbyes.

…

“Sa-kha-lin Eye-land” she pronounced the title bits by bits. “Oh, this is the book you’ve been talking about!” “Yep, finished reading them on my way to Seoul yesterday. Might as well just give it to you since none of my friends gave any about literary works.” Her gaze was still on the front cover of ‘Sakhalin Island’ and there were hints of smile in her lips. “Thanks!” “Let’s say it’s your birthday gift. When is actually your birthday?” “Oh, birthday. Easy! Mine is the third day of Christmas. 28^th December.” “28^th December.” I said as I drew a virtual number 28 in the air with my fingers. “Yours?” “It’s a secret.” “Hey, that’s not fair. I told you mine already.” “Mine? Today.”

She dropped one hold of the novel and now ‘Sakhalin Island’ was held single-handed by her left hand. “You’re so mean you know.” She suddenly told me. “How can you not tell me it’s your birthday today?” I laughed. “I’m telling you now.” “I would’ve brought you to somewhere nicer.”

“Ya! If an illegal trip to your dorm isn’t the best present, I have no idea what is. Last night was the best birthday present. I get to see stars in Seoul as an added bonus!” Both of us laughed. I picked up my backpack from the ground and checked again my bus ticket. We didn’t say anything. No goodbyes as I entered the bus’ entry. Then suddenly a warm embrace came from behind. It was Seoul.

“See you next year birthday boy!” she screamed and walked away from the bus stop and later disappear into the corner.