Yookyung hadn’t informed a single soul of the events that took place between herself and Kai. When Naeun asked, she told her that she bought a phone, that she tried street food, that she bought ice cream, all that jazz. However, she hadn’t described how she felt when she was with him. How she felt alive, emotional, free. When she was with Kai, she could be ‘herself’… whatever that was. When she was with Kai, she instinctively took down her front. When she was with Kai, she felt something her parents rarely gave her. She felt love (but she didn’t know that yet). She felt amazing and she hated it.

In her own mind, Yookyung wasn’t supposed to be able to feel like this, she believed that her feelings should have been locked away a long time ago. She was only supposed to emote on command. So what was this? Why were her emotions reacting spontaneously? It gave her chills. She thought it was inconceivable. Absolutely horrible.

And so, for this reason alone, she avoided Kai. If they had a class together, she’d sit in the seat furthest away from him. At lunch, she fled as far away from the canteen as possible. During dinner, she’d bring her meal up to her room. And on the weekends, she locked herself away. This system continued for approximately two weeks before Naeun got tired of it. Naeun was aggravated as she herself barely saw the heiress. She had no clue as to why Yookyung was distancing herself from the world after making clear improvement. So, she confronted her.

“Yookyung.”

“Hm?” The two girls were lying on their beds; Naeun was flicking aimlessly through her iPod whereas Yookyung was, of course, doing her homework.

“I’m confused.”

“About what?”

“You.”

“Me?” Yookyung turned her head to face her friend.

“Mm.”

“Why?”

“Because… because you… opening up then not… then avoiding everyone. I don’t get it.” Naeun sighed.

“I-I… I don’t know what to say.” Yookyung ducked her head in shame.

“Is it because of me?”

“Of course not!” Yookyung sat up immediately.

“Then why? I barely see you around school. In fact, I barely see you, period.”

“I know…” Yookyung sighed as she sunk back down onto her bed. Naeun eyed her sceptically.

“Is it because of Kai? Did that do something to hurt you?” Naeun could feel her blood boiling.

“No!” Yookyung said a little too quickly. Naeun eyed her suspiciously.

“What did he do?” Naeun’s expression had turned dark.

“Technically speaking, he didn’t do anything…”

“Which means what?”

“He just made me feel weird… like, good weird.” Yookyung scrunched her eyebrows in confusion as she tried to explain.

“So he made you feel good… weird, and you’re avoiding everything?”

“Not everything… just… just him.” Yookyung whispered.

“Why?”

“I told you why.”

“No.” Naeun protested.

“Explain. Everything.” She continued.

“Well, I… he… we… kissed.” Yookyung managed to say.

“What?! You kissed him?”

“No…”

“You just said-“

“He kissed me…” Yookyung delicately touched her lips intuitively and let a little smile escape her lips. Naeun saw this and wasn’t sure of whether she should be excited or worried.

“And that means?”

“That’s just it. I have no idea.” Yookyung exclaimed, defeated.

“How do you not have any idea?” Naeun made a face.

“I’m not sure. It’s like… it’s like… he… he made me feel… good… you know, about myself… yet at the same time, he made me feel… confused. And it wasn’t… it wasn’t just my head. It was my body as well. Like, when he approached me, you know… to kiss me… my legs… they felt weak but at the same time, they were… frozen. My stomach, it started churning… not in a bad way, but it was… it was… scary.”  Yookyung rambled on and on, trying her best to convey how she felt. Naeun smiled knowingly. She knew the feeling, a little too well.

“You like him.” Naeun stated matter-of-factly. Yookyung’s eyes widened.

“No, that’s impossible.” She shook her head, like a child.

“No, it’s not impossible. In fact, it’s very, very possible.” Naeun chuckled.

“How? It can’t be possible. I… I’m me. I don’t like anybody. I haven’t been programmed that way. It’s… No…” Yookyung mumbled, afraid.

“What are you talking about? Programme? You aren’t a robot Yookyung. You’re only human. You’re allowed to feel something, anything. None of this should be foreign to you. In fact, if anything, it should come natural to you.” Naeun looked at Yookyung, straight in the eye. Trying to find some sort of clue as to why she behaved like this.

“You won’t understand.”

“You’re right. I don’t understand, but only because you haven’t told me anything. You, you need to realise that I’m not going to hurt you. You need to trust me. I’m your friend. I’m here to help; I’m here to listen. Unconditionally.” Naeun moved from her bed to Yookyung’s and sat beside her.

“It’s a long story…”

“I have time.” Naeun grinned. Yookyung sighed. For the rest of the night, Yookyung told Naeun her life story, how her parents treated her like a puppet, and not like their daughter. How she was restricted from everything her whole life, how it was as if she grew up in a cage. Yookyung didn’t know anything; she was smart yet at the same time, she had no knowledge whatsoever. The business, the business was her top priority. The company, the media, everyone back ‘home’ knew her and who she was. She was constantly being watched. One mistake, and she was done for. She told Naeun she didn’t have to feel sorry for her, as it was the only thing she knew but Naeun knew better. She could see the spite evident in Yookyung’s eyes when she talked about training her emotions, how she described that her father could never be satisfied with her and how there was always something to improve. How, she was forced to be the ‘perfect child’. She never had any friends, real friends. She had no life outside her father’s. It was a truly sad tale. Yookyung explained to Naeun about Kai. About the fateful night he showed the girl her first glimspe of freedom. She couldn’t empathise with Yookyung, but she tried her best to understand. To not feel anything at all, it was a difficult task, but Yookyung managed to accomplish it… until Kai entered her life that is. Naeun was no longer against their relationship, or their potential relationship or whatever they had going on. Nevertheless, she was still wary, she didn’t trust Kai. He was too… Kai.

♡

“There he is!” Naeun screeched. She was pointing to the three musketeers as they were talking amidst themselves by the lockers.

“No, no, no, no! Naeun!” Yookyung tried to run away but Naeun pushed her forward until she saw a group of girls approach them.

She saw Kai, chatting them up, exuding charm. It made her sick. He enjoyed the attention way too much and she wasn’t going to let Yookyung become one of his many playthings. She her heel and yanked Yookyung along behind her. But she wasn’t fast enough. Kyungsoo spotted them and the three chased after the two girls. Luhan was the fastest and blocked Naeun’s path.

“Get. Out. Of. My. Way.” Naeun growled between clenched teeth. Yookyung’s wrist was starting to ache. She pulled away from Naeun’s grasp, only to be hauled up onto Kai’s shoulder.

“Kai! Put me down!” She screamed, dangling helplessly.

“No. Just stay put, stop wriggling so much.”

“Kai! Put her down.” Naeun instructed. He just walked off with Yookyung still slung over his shoulder, leaving Naeun standing there with hanging open.

“Naeun, you’re going to attract flies if you keep standing there like that…” Kyungsoo joked.

“Shut up, I’m not in the mood.” She glared at her cousin.

“We-eell, I best get going, see ya!” Kyungsoo ran off, leaving Luhan and Naeun alone in the corridor. Naeun was about to leave when Luhan grabbed her wrist. He gulped. His head was spinning and he didn’t know what he was doing but he had to do something, anything. Naeun’s stomach was flipping at his touch, but she didn’t let it show.

“We… we need to talk, Naeun” Luhan started.

“I have nothing to say to you.” Naeun jerked her arm out of his grasp and ran down the hall and out the door. Luhan sighed and told himself, I probably deserved that.