After waking up from my nap, I found that it was already 7 in the evening, I must have been so stressed I've napped for a little more than three hours. So after getting up and getting changed into my favored pyjamas, I sat down in my bed thinking of what I could possibly do.

Then ‘BAM’, an idea popped into my head.

I’ll make a placard; you did say you wanted one and one you’ll get. Before collecting all the needed necessities to make the placards, I got up and waltz over to my dresser to get an unwanted worn out t-shirt to replace my pyjama top; remember playing with glitter is dirty work so it’s better to wear worn out t-shirt instead.

After everything is done and collected, I placed everything in the middle of floor, which of course is cover in tons and tons of newspaper. Now how should I go about making this, I knew it had to shout something like ‘Key was here’ or something along that kind of feeling.

Once I got all my ideas together, I knew something perfect will come out of it, well apart from being covered in bright pink and lime green glitter,  but who cares because in front of me now, if I have to say so myself, is the greatest placard ever; Jjong, you better be happy, I worked hard on this.

Once everything was put back into their rightful place, I once again grew tired and felt like sleeping, mind you, it’s not like that I minded because tomorrow is going to be a great day. I’ve picked up the habit of listening to music while I slowly drift to sleep; grabbing my iPod from my dresser I put my two favourite songs on loop; Beautiful Soul, by Jesse McCartney and Bestfriend, Jason Chen.

And just like in the afternoon it takes only a fraction of a second for my two eyelids to fall, sending me into a deep slumber.

Waking up, sure is fun especially if you know that reality is by far better than your dreams, however in my case all I ever want to do is sleep and nap anything that will take me into the land of sleep and dreams; why? It’s easy, in my dreams, I live the perfect life; the life in which my family accepted and still loved me for who I am, life where I feel the heat and the fast paced heartbeat of the man I love as I lay naturally against him and especially the life where, I didn’t feel no pain because I didn’t need to. We all know how life isn’t fair, right so obviously with only a flutter of an eye I get taken back to my reality, to the world in which I’m hated by some and pained by many.

“I seriously need to be more of an optimist” I thought aloud, while I let my eyes familiarise themselves with their surroundings and the light which reflected every single colour in my out of the fashion magazine bedroom.

I looked at the side of my bed where a clock lays on top of a huge stack of magazines; which reads 11 o’clock. ‘I must have been out like a brick, after all that crafty stuff last night’ I thought as I stretch myself just like how a cat would after waking up from its sleep.

‘What to do, what to do’ the words played like a broken record as I got changed for the day ahead. After getting my face and precious hair ready, I walked out of the bathroom to only nearly trip over, a huge placard.

As I was just about to go and lean over to pick up the placard, my phone rang.

“Hey, Jjong what’s up?” I asked casually before flipping away my newly dyed, dirty blond locks.     

“Don’t ‘Hey, Jjong’ me, where are you” Voice clearly annoyed however if analysed closely also masked with panic.

‘What’s up with him’ was all I could think of.

“Well, obviously I’m at home; why? Where am I supposed to be?” I asked clearly curious and as I let my eyes wonder around my room, before it fell on the placard that I nearly tripped over just a moment ago… oh…oh,

“What do you mean ‘Where am I supposed to be?’ I thought you said you’ll be here” The husky voice at the end of the line sounding so; dejected.

.

How could I ing forget, God Kibum you’re such a , now Jonghyun thinks that you don’t care.

“Jjong, I’m so sorry I forgot, b-but d-don’t worry, I’m already changed and everything so I’ll be there a soon as I can, okay. I care Jjong, I care.” It was all I said before grabbing my keys, phone and the placard I made out of my room.

“Just please be here soon, Key” You said, before a long sigh left your mouth.

And after that the line went silent, indicating that the call has ended.

‘Geez, how could I forget and I was so hyped and excited about it too, oh God, he must hate me now, he probably feels like some kind of abandoned puppy right now; way to ing go Kibum you made the man of your life, feel like crap, in the day where his meant to feel like his on top of the world’ I blamed myself over and over again as drove to the place where you were performing; the time already reading, ten minutes to twelve, after reading this my nerves calmed down, I knew I’d be able to make it on time as the drive to ‘Zone Out’ was less than a ten minute drive.

“I’m coming Jjong, just wait for me, I’ll be there soon” I said aloud.

I prayed to the lord like there was no tomorrow because, as if it was a miracle there was no traffic to keep me away from getting nearer and nearer to you. And just like that the ‘Zone Out’ sign already came to view- ‘Thank you, Papa G; I promise I’ll go to church this coming Sunday’ I thought.

“Why the hell is there so many cars, where the hell am I going to park” I screamed at nothing but thin air, ‘Crap, I’ve got, only two minutes’. After, much deliberation I decided to just park at the nearest place I could find and just pray to the higher beings of the universe that I’d be able to run fast enough to make it on time.

I hate running so much, but it was all worth it because as I jogged closer to the café, I can see you and your searching eyes, eying the huge clock that was plastered at the wall of the small café – ‘You waited for me’ was all I thought before I reached for the front door of the café and as I pulled it, a sound indicating that a new customer has entered chimed and as fast as the speed of light, your brown orbs darted to where the sound came from. A small smile kissed my lips to show my happiness, as I witness your eyes widen with anticipation, as well as the transforming of your pout into the famous lopsided child like smile, at the sight of me.

I thought the smile the caressed your face couldn’t get any wider, but I thought wrong because as your russet brown orbs locked sight with the hard to miss placard which read ‘Kim Jonghyun, My 1#’ in alternating pink and lime green glitter, your face lit up like a light bulb in an overdrive and your lips curving up into a wide grin. And when you cheekily winked at me, I knew straight away that I was somewhat forgiven for forgetting.

It was odd to say the least, because just like the Red Sea that Mosses parted, the crowd that was already waiting magically did the same; it’s as if they knew that I was the one their performer was waiting for. But after much deliberation, I just hung my head low and made my way to the chair that was left reserved, which was placed conveniently in front of the mini stage, where you were going to perform.

After settling down, the once frown filled face has turned into a livelier one, I smiled at the thought of how it was me that was able to do something like that, times like these confuses and pains me more because you can’t help but to want to think that maybe given with a little nudge or push that you could possible like me too.

“Thanks, for coming Bummie. I was gonna go on a diva strop and not perform if you weren’t here” You said while chuckling before giving me the puppy eye smile of yours.

“I told you I’d come, but hey you owe me an iced coffee, I had to run just to be here on time” I stated

You chuckled, eyes turning into half moons and rows of perfectly straight and white teeth that could put any tooth paste adverts to shame, gladly put on show.

“Yeah, yeah; now watch me blow these entire girls’ mind away” You said with that notorious smug and cocky expression.

As much as I wanted to tell you, how much of a freaking show off you are and how you think far too much of yourself, I couldn’t because what you said was true, even I’m surprise why a decent singing company still hasn’t discovered you, you could blow anyone’s mind away if you wanted to with that sent from heaven voice. You’ve blown my mind away for sure, even as simple as humming, birds would probably die of jealousy.

“Please, I’ve heard better” I retorted, missing the hurt expression that caress your face, which lasted less than a fraction of a second.

“We shall see” Was all you said before tapping your feet to signal the band to play.

Before I praised myself to be completely blown away by my best friend slash wanna be boyfriend, I took into consideration the thousands of eyes that also has the look of anticipation and want within them, maybe today I won't be just praising myself to be blow away by your amazing voice but also the pain of having to witness all these fan girls ogling you and your harmonious voice. How should I pretend to be okay this time, maybe smile and laugh like as if the world is only populated by you and I or maybe just act like the way I always do, I've picked up the talent to be able to fake like I'm fine.

But as quick as the troubles plagued my mind, the smile soon took over as the familiar tune of one of my favorite song filled the cafe. As if my eyelids had a mind of their own, they closed to be fully immersed in the melodic lyrics that flowed so effortlessly from your luscious and plump mouth.

“I don't want another pretty face

I don't want just anyone to hold

I don't want my love to go to waste

I want you and your beautiful soul”

This was the song you sang for me on my birthday, thinking back at it now I’ve probably looked like a horrendous crying mess when you told me that you were going to play for me as my birthday present, as much as you want to play the ‘cocky’ type you’ve always been humble about your talent in singing; never once did you try to flaunt it when we were still in Uni, heck none of our friends, even our closes ones like Onew, Taemin or even Minho knew that you posses such talent, we all knew you could sing it was obvious you were a music student after all, but none of us has ever once heard you sing. However for some reason the day that you swept me of my feet when you sang that son, gaining tons and tons of praises from me, I wouldn’t say you’ve became cockier; more confident if we want to be precise and I really appreciated the change, you sang and hummed more.

“I know that you are something special

To you I'd be always faithful

 I want to be what you always needed

Then I hope you’ll see the heart in me”

Your voice is so captivating, so enthralling that I can’t help but be lost in the music but as much as I want to be in this place where all I need is your music I also want to witness how passionate and lost in the music you are; the way you would throw your head back to release the best, hair raising long note or the way you would close your eyes so that you, yourself could be immersed in the music.

“You're the one I wanna chase

You're the one I wanna hold

I won’t let another minute go to waste

I want you and your beautiful soul, your beautiful soul”

I open my eyes, slowly but like the force of two magnets my gaze fell straight on you, God you look so beautiful up there, singing your heart out like it was the last day on earth; that place up on stage with a live acoustic band and a microphone at hand is where you truly belong, its where you were destined to be.

We kept our gazes at each other, completely erasing the people and the surroundings around us; just once I’ll be selfish and think, that you were singing for me, that the lyrics and the tuneful melody that accompanied was meant for me, just this once I’ll believe that you were serenading me.

And with our gazes never leaving each other, I was slow to realize that the song was coming to an end as you sang the beginning of the last stanza.

 
“I don't want another pretty face

I don't want just anyone to hold

I don't want my love to go to waste

 I want you and your beautiful soul, beautiful soul

Your beautiful soul”

Thinking that nothing can top of that wonderful performance you prove me wrong once again as the corner of your lips tugged into a genuine love filled smile, leaving me utterly breathless.

And with that the crowd the surrounded me roared in both claps and praises, saying how wonderful you were on your first day and how insanely talented you also were, I just hope this doesn’t get in your head Jonghyun-ah. But as well as the cheering and the bewildered expression that you left on every costumers face, there were also many of those, mainly girls with lust filled expression, vigorously noting down phone numbers into papers and napkins so that it could be easily given to you. ‘Be ready for the heartbreak Key, smile and carry on’ I thought while inhaling and exhaling slowly. Forget about them Key, you’re here for your best friend.

After taking a swig of water you turned around to face me before jumping casually of the stage.

“So, you still think you’ve heard better” You said with the obnoxious smug look that seems to be plastering your face more often than I would of liked.

An unwanted tint of rosy pink caressed my face, I still have pride you know, I can’t just tell you how insanely talented you were so all I could do was lift up the huge placard that was sitting nicely in my lap and kept my head low as I stood up.

“And, I’m taking that as a ‘No’, Bummie” You said while you picked up the placard from my hand.

“This looks amazing, Key and hey look green and pink glitters its mine and yours’ favourite colour. I love it Bum, thank you for coming… even though you made me go into a panic attack thinking you weren’t going to come” You praised, huge smile only getting wider as you realise why I’ve chosen those two certain colours, however pouting as you state your fear of my absence.

“Yeah, you better like it I spent hours on it. Jjong and hey, I told you I was coming right… I just never said if I was going to come on time or not, plus I’m a fashion designer, I have to always come in fashionably late, remember” I joked, receiving a light chuckle from you, was all I needed to know, to reassure myself that yes, I’m one hundred percent forgiven.

“Plus, as I said before I wouldn’t miss this for the world, as much as I hate to say this out loud you were amazing up there Jjong, seriously. Up there, in that stage you become this totally different person, it’s like the music and atmosphere changes you” I added, sincerely. I usually do all my praising inside my head but sometimes when I’m given the moment to be able to rant out how amazing and talented you are without having to worry about people getting the wrong idea, then so help me, I’ll take every chance I can get to tell you, just how special you really are. 

“Thank you Bummie, you seriously don’t know how important it means for you to be here, it’s not just the music that changes me, there are other things… much more important things.” You said in a quite whisper as you once again surprise me with a small gentle hug.

“But you were still late, as your puppysaurus, aren’t I, better yet shouldn’t I get any special treatment or something” You added with a pout, gosh your so bipolar, your all hot and passionate one minute and then your cute and whinny the next.

“Correctly put, but I’m not your diva for nothing” I said with a light shrug; Diva mode, now in full swing.

“Plus, where’s the iced coffee you owe me?” I added, which only made you pout.

“Things just never change, okay come on diva let’ get you some iced coffee” You stated before taking my hand, but before we could of even moved we were interrupted by a group of small, fragile looking girls.

“Excuse me, M-mr. K-Kim…w-we just wanted to c-congratulate you… o-on your first day, y-you were a-amazing” The girl that was closes to us said, probably before mentally collapsing because of the pure embarrassment. I couldn’t help but smile at her shyness, I couldn’t blame her, I was just like that; face flushed with pink as shyness took over, stuttering unable to form coherent sentences, when you first approached me-“Hey, I’m Kim Jonghyun, is it alright if I could sit here”

“W-wow, geez umm… thanks, I guess…” You said, hand flying to the back of your neck scratching it, how can you be so God damn cute and shy, Jjong.

“B-but, hey no need for ‘Mr Kim’, I maybe older than you guys but I’m not that old, I’m only 22” You said with a pout, receiving plenty of oohhh’s and ahhh’s, plus the occasional ‘ OMFG, I wanna hug and cherish him’ from the crowed. Hang in there, Kibum this is going to be a hell of an adventure.

“Oh, o-okay” was all she said before completely silencing, hands fiddling with one another, beads of sweat ready to roll down from her head to her temples.

“Thanks again you guys, I’ll continue to work hard, but I have to say goodbye as this little diva is probably getting impatient, by now” You thank them while signalling towards me, I could only stand there and give an awkward smile as the girls bid their farewell before you turned around with hand still laced in mine, heading for the counter, turning back for the last time to wave the group goodbye.

“Yah, what do you mean, impatient? I was not impatient” I protested with a slightly annoyed tone after slapping you lightly on the back of the shoulder accompanied by a pout.

“So, what your trying to say is that, somehow you where diagnosed with excessive foot tapping disease” You bluntly stated, but come on, you can’t expect me to not be impatient, when some girl is clearly and very bluntly hitting on my man best friend.

“Shut it, puppy” I growled before making my own way to the counter, before adding-

“Because of that I’m ordering a large mocha cookie crumble frappuccino and a chocolate chip muffin and you’re… paying” I shouted over the noise of the crowed. I could only hear a loud snicker from you as a response.

However as much as I want to smile and laugh with you for your new job that seemed to be so fitted for you, my heart just can’t seem to find the strength to do so; as stupid and helpless as it is, it knows that in a matter of days, it will be crying out in pain as it watches you drift away from my grasp as the countless girls lure you into theirs.