Bad Behavior
Chapter Five
Yongguk POV

I knew there was something about Choi Junhong that would lead to the death of me. I just never imagined it’d be his relation. After seeing Jieun that day, twice, it was like salt in a fresh wound. If I had ever been warned that falling in love would hurt so much at the end, I would have never loved at all; it simply wasn’t worth it.

I drank so much that night that I woke up on Himchan’s couch half . My throat was raw and my eyes couldn’t adjust to the light from the big windows that made up the east wall. Groaning as I rolled over to burry my face in the cushions, I was sure that I was dying. And even if I had drank enough to kill a horse, maybe even a baby elephant, the pain in my chest was still there. Knowing that no matter how many times this happened, or how deeply I hurt, Jieun wouldn’t be there, was killing me. I was really dying of a broken heart.

But a sudden smack to the back of the head certainly wasn’t helping either. I cried out as Himchan passed by, drying his hair from a shower that still dripped on his bare chest. “Get up. I have to work today, so I don’t have all day to wait and take you home.” he commanded, crossing to the breakfast nook where some cut up fruit sat.

“How did I get here?” I moaned, forcing myself to sit up. The pressures in my head were all off, making it difficult to tell if I swaying, or if we were caught in an earthquake. Himchan seemed fairly unphased, so I suspected the prior. Glancing over at me from his breakfast, he whipped the towel toward me. In my hungover state, my reflexes weren’t nearly enough to deflect it, and it hit me in the face.

“Ya... Don’t ask such stupid questions. You drank and the bartender called me, and I had to come down and get you before you passed out. How does it ever happen? Do you know how busy I am these days? We’ve got no evidence to establish the character of this damn murderer, and it’s all on me to win the appeal. I  don’t have time to be babysitting you, Yongguk!”

I had to be honest, and say that I felt bad. Himchan, though we often bickered, was always there for me. I’d like to have said that I had his back in return, but Himchan didn’t need it. Ever since we were kids, he had been working hard to become self-sufficient and never rely on anyone. Sighing, I searched around for my shirt. I could at least try not to burden him anymore.

“And that kid... Just what’s up with you two anyway?” Himchan added as I began to button up the shirt. Eyes wide, I glanced at him in confusion.

“Kid... Do you mean Junhong?” I questioned.

Himchan rolled his eyes. “Yes! What other kid? Meeting him at the mall... Buying him things... And him calling for you? Yongguk, don’t tell me---”

“He called?”

Himchan let out an impatient groan as he swallowed the last bite. “Yes! Do you not remember a thing? Aigoo, aigoo, I’m going to have an aneurysm because of you!”

I hung my head as he rushed me out the door and into the elevator. “Look, you don’t have to tell me, just don’t do anything stupid. Okay? I’m probably already in a bad place because of Jieun,” he warned me. Nodding a bit, I looked away, trying to recall the phone call from the night before,  but it was pointless.

We didn’t talk on the ride to my place, and I think it was Himchan taking pity on me and my pulsating headache. I was determined to not make him worry over me for at least a few days, but consequently, I made myself feel like .. Living through the pain of losing your only love while sober was like a suicide wish. Honestly, in the past few months, that very notion had crossed my mind more than once.

I was in a dark place, there was no question about that. But no matter how much I wanted to stop feeling, and to go completely numb, my breaths still came. Even if  tried to stop my own breathing, soon my lungs forced a breath. I was helpless, even to control myself, let alone the course of my failed marriage. All along, I had been living blindly, thinking that everything was okay, and that’s what hurt the most.

But despite the pain, and inner turmoil I experienced, Himchan reminded me that I had to go in and tutor Junhong once I was called to do so. Pulling myself out of bed not long before I had to leave, I quickly showered and got dressed and hailed a taxi. I wasn’t sure if I’d even still be employed by the time I got there, but if I wasn’t, at least I could really cut things off with Jieun.

I had worshipped the ground she walked on, and so when she told me she didn’t want me to meet her family, I hadn’t objected. I had never imagined that it’d come back to bite me so severely. Junhong was a brat, but he was smart. If he needed to be forced to do his work by me, that was none of my business. I knew the kid could go far if he tried, he just needed the motivation. I would have liked to stick around and been that motivation, but if it meant having to see Jieun, I didn’t think my heart could take it.

Either way, I, at the very least, managed to survive the car ride there and the walk down down the driveway. It was after that when things got difficult. Knocking on the door, Jongup answered in seconds, just like he always had. Though, I wasn’t greeted with the smell of food or a big smile this time, which was my first warning sign. Bowing my head a bit, I kept my eyes on the ground.

“Is Junhong feeling better?” I asked awkwardly. Jongup grabbed me by the shoulders and looked at me with big eyes that threatened to water at any second. Raising my eyebrows, I waited for an explanation.

“He didn’t come home... Junhong is always home by now!” Jongup said frantically, his face paling considerably. To me, it didn’t sound like anything more than him trying to skip tutoring, but Jongup was honestly and truly worried. He broke away from me to pace down the entry way, chewing on his lips.

“Maybe he went out with friends or something without telling you,” I suggested, patting his shoulder. Frowning at me, he shook his head fervently. Rubbing his hands nervously, I thought the kid was seriously going to burst into tears at any second.

“He always tells me... Something must have happened!” he insisted. Sighing, I nodded.

“Do you want to go check out the school, then?” I asked, half sarcastic. In return he nodded eagerly and grabbed onto my wrist and pulled me along. I wouldn’t have had a choice after that point, because damn, that kid had a grip on him! I followed after him and hopped into the passenger seat of a car far nicer than I noticed at the time. I didn’t get a chance to even blink before Jongup was speeding down the street.

I’ll be honest; I couldn’t drive that well. I could when I absolutely needed to, but it had taken me three tries to pass the driving test and get my license. I didn’t like to drive on crowded streets, or on highways when everyone was driving at breakneck speed. On the other hand, I hated traffic where everyone was moving a mile an hour. Even with all that, I knew at least one thing.

I was a better driver than Jongup.

Maybe it was because he was upset, but I’m pretty sure we were doing seventy in a twenty zone, and that a few poor ladies got the fright of their lives as he swerved around the lanes. When he stopped you could hear the rubber squealing and smell and awful stench. It was worse when he made a sharp turn and I went flying left and right.

“Slow down!” I pleaded, but he did no such thing. In the final stretch, a school zone, he sped up even more. I was certain that my seatbelt was going to leave a bruise on my chest for the rest of my life, and that I’d have a heart attack if he didn’t stop soon.

But when he stopped was when I came closest to having a heart attack. The school’s parking lot was deserted, and there wasn’t a car in sight. There was, however a group of kids surrounding a mop of pink  hair. My heart skipped a beat and I was out of the car before Jongup had even come to a full stop. Sprinting over, knowing Jongup would be close behind, I shouted.

“Hey! What the hell’s going on here?”

Seven heads turned to look at me, and one remained tucked into his chest as he curled up into a ball on the ground. The kids exchanged looks, and one went to kick Junhong again before turning to face me. He was short, with tiny eyes and artificially colored hair. Crossing his arms, the little brat glared up at me.

“Who the are you?”

I almost slapped him right there, but another kid, big, kind of chubby, grabbed Junhong by the collar. Shoving the cocky one out of the way, I pulled Junhong back toward myself as I pushed the chubby one away. “I’ll be the one asking the questions, you little brats,” I growled as Jongup pushed his way into the circle. I passed Junhong off to him, and Jongup instantly took him in his arms protectively.

“This ain’t any of your business, old man,” one with dark eyes told me, putting on a fearsome face as he stepped toward me. I would have rearranged that face, but another one spoke.

“Of course, the little princess has someone to come rescue him,” a nerdy looking one scoffed, getting a laugh from the one that seemed to be in charge. He raised his hand for a highfive, but instead I grabbed his wrist and pulled the little brat toward me, gripping hard enough to make him wince.

“Watch it, I’m a minor,” he growled snottily. I laughed in his face at that, only holding him tighter causing him to let out a bit of a whimper. I pushed him back against the school door. “You’ll get arrested.” Fist connected with metal beside his head, leaving a lasting dent in not only the door, but probably the kid’s underwear as well. He closed his eyes tight, swallowing hard as I leaned in.

“And this kid’s parents have the best damn lawyer in Korea. I’m a teacher, and therefore have hundreds of thousands of dollars put aside in insurance to pay for lawsuits from little brats like you. What do you have?”

He looked up at me with big scared eyes, like a deer in headlights, and the first brat grabbed my wrist, trying to pull me away. “We didn’t hurt him, he’s fine. We were just teaching him a lesson, but he’s a spoiled brat and gets out of even that,” he grumbled. I released the first one and twisted the other around, holding his wrist tight and pushing him toward the ground.

“Seven against one? That’s how you teach lessons? You kids are really pathetic!” I shouted. I was so angry I was shaking and that my face was hot. The kid squirmed and all the others stood helplessly, not sure what to do. The nerdy one now sat on the ground watching with big eyes.

“Zico--- Hey, leave him alone! He has bad bones!” he shouted up at me. I bit back a smirk as I released Zico, or whatever his real name was, and let him fall to the ground beside the other.

“Anybody else have something to say? No? Good. Now ing scram you little s,” I commanded, raising my voice. They all watched me for a few moments, looking to Zico for direction. Wiping his mouth, he glared up at me, and then at Junhong, who kept his head down beside Jongup.

“This isn’t over,” he promised as the chubby one helped him up. Hesitantly and begrudgingly the group of thug kids went their own way. After they were good and out of sight, I held my knuckles that had popped from punching the door. Leaning back against the cool metal, I let out a frustrated shout, at nothing in particular. My life was really a big ball of stress, and it was going to be the death of me.

Finally Junhong lifted his head, allowing Jongup to get a good look. He looked pretty much okay, considering there had been seven of the kids.His lip was split, and he had a few scratches here and there. They must have got him pretty good in the eye though, since his cheek was swollen. Oddly enough it almost looked like an old bruise, but I couldn’t tell. He held his ribs uncomfortably  as Jongup poked and prodded.

“Are you okay? Oh, Junhong, why didn’t you call me? If you thought this would happen I would have picked you up early.”

Junhong didn’t respond, and only glared at the ground. Sighing, I placed a hand on his shoulder. “You’re embarrassing the kid. C’mon, let’s get him cleaned up,” I suggested. Junhong’s shoulders went tense in my grasp as I ushered him back to the car.

I drove this time, to save Junhong from breaking a rib or something. My house was closer, and I knew I had stuff to treat his injuries, so without asking, I just took them there. Jongup was unfazed by the shifty looking apartment building, but Junhong seemed scared to touch much of anything, keeping his arms in close to himself and shying away from my neighbors that we passed.

“Sit at the table,” I told them. “And take off your shirt, I’ll be back.”

Hurrying off to the bathroom, I retrieved a first aid kit and some neosporin knock off. I came back to Junhong protested as Jongup ed his shirt, whining and complaining.”Would you rather tell your mom what happened?” I asked, getting him to hold still. Jongup slipped the shirt off of him, and I glanced at the milky white skin that was turning a sickly purple.

Junhong was even thinner than he looked. You could see each one of his ribs, and each knot of his spine. Crossing his arms over his chest to hide from my eyes, he looked away while Jongup went to work, cleaning out his cuts. Averting my own eyes, I excused myself for a cigarette.

When I returned, Jongup had finished wrapping his ribs and put band-aids over his cuts. He was putting his shirt back on when I sat beside him. He looked away, and his swollen lips emphasized the pout on his lips. “You’re really not going to tell my mom, right?” I shook my head to assure him, smiling a bit. I patted his back as he fumbled with the buttons on his shirt.

“If those kids bother you again, tell me. I haven’t got much to lose.”

Jongup left the room to return the supplies to the bathroom and to wash his hands, and Junhong immediately lifted his eyes to me. “How’s your hand?” he asked, reaching under the table to grab it for a better look. I chuckled a bit, glancing down at the swollen appendage.

“It’s been better, but I don’t think amputation is necessary,” I assured him. He furrowed his eyebrows concentrating hard on the knuckles that had been pushed out of their normal position. Keeping on hand beneath mine, he used the other to gently trail his fingers over the bruised skin. His touch was tender, and brought painful memories of my wife to me.

“I’m sorry...” he said, his voice falling to a whisper. I laughed it off, trying to swallow back the painful thoughts.

“When... I was a kid,”  Junhong began hesitantly, keeping his eyes glued to my hand, “I hurt myself a lot... My legs were too long, so I was clumsy... And well, every time I hurt myself, Jongup would kiss the wound...”

I raised an eyebrow, not really sure where he was going with that, until he lifted my swollen hand to his swollen lips. It was such a little thing, but it seemed incredibly... Intimate, and wrong to me. His eyes fluttered shut, and he kept his lips on my skin for a few seconds before jerking away at the sound of the bathroom door. Jongup didn’t question the awkward atmosphere, but prevented me from asking any questions.

Trying to forget Junhong’s actions, we drove to a nearby store to get some make-up to cover up his bruises. It was a lot harder than women made it look, and even with Jongup and I combined we had managed to by three containers of the wrong shade, and lipgloss when we thought we were buying concealer. Eventually Junhong let out a frustrated, “UGH!” and stormed in to buy his own makeup.

Laughing, we decided to wait and let him apply it the mirror of the passenger seat. “Mrs. Choi will be home soon---” Jongup reminded us. So, we thought on our feet. We let Junhong stay in the front as Jongup happily took the backseat for himself. As I drove, he continued to cover up the cuts and bruises, but left the one beside his eye. I didn’t question it, and Jongup didn’t either.

We managed to get home just before Junhong’s mother and effectively made it through half an assignment. Once she entered the room, the air was tense. Junhong refused to look at her, and she refused to look at him. “Mr. Bang, there’s something I’d like to discuss with you,” she said. I heaved a sigh, knowing that soon I’d been unemployed again. I stood  to follow her, but Junhong jumped up too.

“Before you go,” he said, speaking loud and clear. “I just want you to know, you’re the best tutor I’ve ever had. I don’t think I’d work better with anyone else. Thank-you for tutoring me.” Junhong was totally bullting that, but his mother knew that as well. She rolled her eyes as Junhong bowed to me. “I really mean it,” he persisted. “I think I’d really resent if I had to get a new tutor.”

Beside me, Mrs. Choi sighed. Shaking her head, she dismissed me. Even while keeping his head low, I could see Junhong’s grin extending from ear to ear. I was surprised in all honesty. A week ago, Junhong would have done anything to get me fired, but here he was, trying to save my position. I knew teenagers were accustomed to mood-swings and all that, but I thought this was a little extreme.

Mrs. Choi went to leave but I called out, stopping her. “Wait a second!” Glancing up at me impatiently, she tapped her toes on the tile. “Junhong wrote an essay about what he feels most passionate about,” I explained, getting a wide eyed look of death from Junhong. “I think you should read it. It was written better than some of the term papers I was handed,” I suggested, retrieving the tiny stack of paper.

While she took it from me, she only offered a distracted nod in reply, as her phone stole her attention. She furrowed her brows and stalked up the stairs. I frowned, and Junhong looked elsewhere. I could tell the kid was hurt by her lack of concern, so I put an arm around him. “It was really great. You did a good job,” I promised, ruffling his hair.

Even under the concealer, I could see the pink fading onto his cheeks as he did his best not to smile. “Be a good kid!” I told him as I left.

That night, I didn’t drink, but I slept like a rock. I don’t think I dreamed, which was for the better. No nightmare would compare to what I’d experience the next day.

My phone woke me up with an notification. Through weary eyes, I read text that I would have rather not seen.

“1000 days.”

Those words haunted me. I swallowed hard, blinking tears just reading those 2 little words. They were so insignificant, so common, yet they stole my breath. Furiously, I dismissed the notification, and went through my phone to delete whatever others I had marked.

Anniversary? Not anymore.
Jieun’s  birthday? Just another Tuesday now.
Valentine’s day? No point.

2,000 days.
3,000 days.
4,000 days.

One by one they all disappeared.

Groaning, I buried my face in the pillow that sat beside my own in a bed meant for two. I had just managed to fall into a fitful sleep when my phone rang again. I assumed it was Himchan, so I ignored it at first. But after the first call, a second one immediately followed. Reluctantly, I lifted the cellphone to my ear.

“Hello?”

“It’s me.”

My heart fell into the pit of my stomach.

“What do you want, Jieun?” I asked quietly. I wanted to be mean, to tell her to hang up and not call me again. She had been the one to say she didn’t want to see me again, so why was it far for her to be able to call me like this? Especially on a day like this.

“I want to talk. Meet me at the cafe; You know, the little pink one that I liked.”

She hung up before I could protest. Somewhere deep inside, I knew I wouldn’t have protested though. She wanted to see me, so I’d go, no matter what, endlessly chasing after her. Pulling myself out of bed, I got dressed, shaving and washing my hair. I decided if she always faced me with perfect composition, I could look my best too. I could at least make her believe that I was making it through our separation with a strong face.

The cafe in question was one we had found while we were in college. The coffee on campus had been awful, and we spent months searching for the perfect place. Everyday I passed it while going to the Choi residence brought new pain. I hadn’t imagined that I’d ever pass through the doors again, but for Jieun I’d do anything.

She sat at the same table we had always shared, dressed completely in black and gazing out the window. Taking a deep breath, I approached her, sitting down. She didn’t look at me right away, sipping her iced coffee in silence. Even when she spoke, she refused to meet my eyes.

“I don’t want you tutoring my baby cousin.”

I wasn’t sure what I had been expecting our meeting to be for, but her directness hurt. There were no hellos, or how have you beens. Only cutting to the chase. Somewhere at the back of my mind, I knew I had been hoping for her forgiveness. Somehow, I had held onto the belief that she was only teaching me a lesson, and that soon, it’d be over and we’d go back to the way we had been.

I thought back to Junhong’s display from the night before. His flushing cheeks, and his embarrassed expression while he tried not to smile. That was enough to make me smile, as my mind drifted back to the soft kiss he had placed on my knuckles, all the way to the  way he had been helpless against the bullies in his school. Himchan’s words also replayed in my head and I nodded to myself.

“I can’t do that.”

Jieun finally looked at me, with a bitter expression hiding behind her calm one. I sat up straight and tall, putting on my strongest face as I prepared to deny her request. “It’s not fair that you’re forming bonds with my family after what we’ve been through, Yongguk,” she continued.

I chuckled a bit, looking away. “I didn’t know he was your family. How did you expect me to know that when you kept it a secret from me?” I countered, earning a frown in reply. “I’m not staying with him because of you.”

“Then why? Why don’t you just go back to teaching?” she asked, her voice beginning to show emotion.

The answer I said surprised even me, and came without a moment’s thought.

“Because that kid needs someone. An adult to look after him. He’s a bright kid but he needs to be pushed to succeed. He needs to feel a reward, and I’ll do that for him.”

She stared at me, knitting her eyebrows together in frustration. “Do you expect me to believe that? When have you ever cared so much about one student?” she shot back.

After that point, I started to get angry, like I was beginning to get used to. Her harsh words showed no compassion though I had never spoken out against her. I had done everything I could for her, but she was still bitterly confronting me about Junhong. It annoyed and frustrated me to no end. Despite my upset feelings, I found myself leaning toward her, smirking.

“When did you become so self-centered, Song Jieun?” I asked her, getting a tiny gap in response. “I’m not doing this because of you. In fact, because of you it’s twice as tedious, twice as annoying, and twice as tiring. But, I like the kid. He’s a good kid, and I’m staying with him.”

Before she could speak, I continued, for once, getting the last word in. “Don’t say anything else. I don’t want to listen anymore. Listen, I’m angry, Jieun. I’m sick of waiting for your little game to end. I learned my lesson, so hurry up and give up this act. I still love you, and you know that you love me too, so stop running away from me. Let’s hurry up and end this before I get anymore frustrated,” I told her, pulling a thing box from my pocket. I passed the velvet case across the table to her.

“I’m still waiting patiently for you to come back, but I’ll only wait so long, Song Jieun. Keep that in mind,” I said as I stood, leaving her and the necklace I had worked hard to buy her behind.

Leaving strongly had taken just about all of my energy, so I had planned on sleeping until it was time to go tutor Junhong.... But, Junhong had other plans.

I returned home to a pink haired boy placing bowls on my table and toting a bag over his shoulder. Several questions raced through my mind at that moment, starting with how he was in my apartment, why he was in my apartment, and what in the world smelled so delicious. Glancing up at me, he smiled, as if it was a completely normal encounter.

“Do you not lock your apartment, hyung?” he asked, digging through the bag to pulled out different side dishes. I opened my mouth to say that in my rush to see Jieun I had forgotten, but then I remembered just who was asking.

“What are you doing here?”

Junhong began to dish up noodles into either bowl as he looked away from me. “I couldn’t go to school...” he said tossing the bag in the trash and searching through my cupboards for glasses.

“Why not?” I snapped, feeling not only intruded on, but exhausted from my exchange earlier in the morning.

“Zico’s going to kill me...!” Junhong replied, frowning over at me. “You heard him, didn’t you! ‘This isn’t over’ You know, the one with the black hair, Minhyuk? The call him B-Bomb and I’m pretty sure he’s in a gang! And Pyo is three times my size. Not to mention Kim Yukwon has a thing for pipes. I’m basically going to die if I go back to school.”

He did honestly sound scared, and so I was left with nothing to say in reply. I could only sigh and give into the pout he wore on his face. “So, what? Are you just dropping out or something?” I asked, as Junhong found the glasses, filling them with milk and returning to sit across from me. Glancing down, I noticed he had bought black noodles. I nearly laughed at the irony of the food for lonely people.

“Well, I’m planning on either faking an appendicitis, or transferring. Maybe go study abroad or something where they can’t hunt me down,” Junhong said with a nod. Bowing his head to me, he dug into his meal, eating quicker than you would expect from such a skinny kid. Sighing again, I ate as well, sharing the meal with him because I didn’t have the energy to send him away.

“They really can’t be that tough,” I said skeptically, as Junhong finished his noodles in a few minutes flat. He moved onto the side dishes, devouring them like a starved animal.

“Did you not hear it when I said one of them is a gangster?” he shot back.

“Well, gangster or not, they all seem like nothing but a group of punk- kids,” I said with a shake of my head. Junhong scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“Easy for you to say when you look like you. Do I look intimidating to you?”

“Fine,” I said with a nod. “This ends today. I’ll scare them less, and even beat some sense into the little bastards if I have to.”

Junhong looked shocked.

“Really?”

I nodded without thinking.

Yep. It was official. I was really going crazy.