chapter two;

It was always the two of us ― Jongin and Suji. Wherever we go, we’d go together. Whatever we do, we’d do together. The inseparable pair, people would call us.

It was funny that we were almost like twins when we actually were nothing but complete strangers who were brought together and grew up alongside each other. Appa said it was fate that destined us together. Umma called it a blessing. As for me, I see Jongin as a gift. A gift so precious that made me question my worth to deserve someone like him.

Someone who would catch me when I fall.

-

It was a hot summer day, and I was dripping with sweat. Fanning myself with one of my text books with my eyes glued on Jongin’s figure on the field, I finally decided that the heat was too much that even the shelter I received from the tree wasn’t enough. I tried to catch Jongin’s attention, but he was too focused on the game. Grabbing my bag, I left the field. For a second, I considered going to the basketball court and played on my own while waiting for Jongin’s soccer practice to be over, but I thought I was already sweating too much, so instead I headed to a place I know would be much cooler.

You see, being a girl who spent almost her entire life following her brother around, I ended up being a bit of a tomboy. I have always preferred Legos over drawings, Power Rangers over Barbies, and sports over entertainment. Even before Jongin came, I have always favored toy cars over playing dressing up.

As I grew older, I began following him to the field and watched from the sideline as he chased and fought over a ball with his teammates. Once the game ended, I would join him and we would have a match of our own; one on one. There, he would teach me some every bit about soccer that he thought I should know. Soon enough, my skills developed rapidly and I was allowed to join the team. I was the only girl in a boys’ team.

However, in my second year of junior high, I picked up basketball and fell in love with the game. Accusing that I betrayed soccer after joining our school’s basketball team, Jongin refused to speak to me for a week. I only realized recently that he was more upset about not spending time together than me having a new interest different from his. It was one of many little things about us that he paid more attention to than I did. It was one of many little things about us that I took for granted.

The cool air from the air conditioner welcomed me as I stepped foot into the deserted library. I love being there the most after dismissal where most students have gone home and it’s much quieter inside there. Not that I was a regular library goer, but it was a good place to be by yourself.

I took a seat in a far corner next to the window and placed the book which I had randomly grabbed on my way on the table in front of me. I looked at the title and scoffed. The Great Gatsby. Really, Suji?

Taking the book with both my hands, I flipped through the pages without much interest. I hadn’t read it properly before but I had heard of the story. The book was one of the reading materials for Jongin’s class, and out of interest I had him explain to me. Listening to it for the first time made me laugh. I thought it was silly of Jay to not being able to move on from Daisy even after being betrayed by her too many times.

“Love is not that simple, Suji,” Jongin mused to me after I stated my opinion. I didn’t ask further, and he said nothing more, so we let the topic die just like that.

Sitting alone in the library with the book gave me a chance to ponder about it again. Ever since the first time he laid his eyes on her, Jay dedicated his entire time loving Daisy, fixing and improving his life, even getting himself involved in bad businesses just so he could match Daisy’s expectations and preferences. However in the end he was never able to attain her, and she remained nothing but a green light in a distance that’s always out of reach.

I glanced at my empty surroundings and gazed at the blue sky outside the window, a thousand thoughts ran through my mind.

-

I didn’t remember when did I fall asleep or how long did I doze off alone in the deserted library. I was awoken by the vibrating sound my phone was making. Rubbing my eyes, I picked it up and checked the caller ID before hitting the answer button. “Hello?”

“You’re still at the library?” ― without an introductory hello, typical of Jongin.

“Yup,” I returned, stifling a yawn.

I heard him chuckling. “Is there a place where you can’t fall asleep that easily?” he asked.

“I wasn’t sleeping,”

“Of course you didn’t,” he said. “I’m going over now so wait for me,”

“Alright,” I let out a yawn, no longer hiding it, and ended the call. Looking at the screen, I noticed that it had been changed to a picture of me sleeping. I studied it more and realized that it was taken here at the library, when I was dozing off earlier.

It took me another minute to notice a new sticky note stuck on the cover of the book. I leaned in to read the tiny yet neat handwriting scribbled on it.

I just thought you ought to look at your own sleeping face. It’s cute.

My eyes widened, and feeling my face growing hot, I glanced around to see if there was anyone. But there wasn’t. I flipped open my phone and dialled the number I knew by heart.

“Yah, did you come in when I was sleeping?” I asked without a hello.

“No, my practice just ended and I’m going to you now. Didn’t I tell you that?” Jongin sounded puzzled.

My forehead creased. “Really?”

“Yup,” he replied. “Why? Did something happen?”

“No, not really. It’s just… I think someone came in earlier,”

“You really should fix your sleeping habit. I bet you wouldn’t even realize it if someone were to kidnap you,” he laughed.

“I wouldn’t worry about that, though,”

“Why not?”

“Because you’ll be there,”

There was this long, eerie silence where we could hear each other breathed over the phone. I could tell he was smiling. At least, I was. Finally, he spoke. “Wait for me there, then,”

Flipping my phone close, I shoved it back to my pocket and stared at the note. I read and reread the simple message, as if memorizing it all, and kept it tucked in between the pages of one of my books. I rose from my seat, placed The Great Gatsby back on the trolley in front of the counter and stepped outside the door to wait for my brother.