The sun was so bright making Jinki squint as he walked around the field, going the longest route possible to avoid the guys training for the soccer team. He tried not to flinch as he heard the captain’s loud voice, and was relieved the sun was too bright for him to see the soccer team clearly. Jinki held a hand up, to avoid the bright sun and to block that one particular person. Although at the same time, internally he fumed at the sun being so hideously bright, making it hard for him to see anyone clearly. Chewing on his lower lip he walked faster, under his breath cursing the bastard who had asked him to meet here, right when the soccer team was training.

 

When Jinki reached his destination he sat in the shade of a large tree, the branches spread out above him, a sun dappled leafy green umbrella. Automatically Jinki dumped his backpack on the ground, so he could take the weight off his shoulders, he glanced around his surroundings as if seeing them for the first time. While waiting for his friend, he realised it was as if he was seeing the grounds the first time, because it had been a year or more since he had stepped on the grass of this field. Nothing had really changed, yet it seemed fresh, different or maybe it was the smell of the newly cut lawn that made him view the sports field differently.

 

Jinki’s heart leaped around in his chest like a ball being kicked from side to side around a court as he watched the tall captain run, his limbs slender and athletic as he chased the soccer ball around. Jinki in a deep breathing, watching captivated until there was a tap on his shoulder and he turned to see his friend rolling his eyes at him. Jinki wanted to swat him away like a pesky fly, and let his eyes feast upon the soccer team training, or rather the captain, but his friend was as persistent as a hungry mosquito and the buzzing around his ears finally made him sigh and turn to look at him.

 

Jinki’s annoyance hidden behind a smile, as he gazed up at his best friend, watching him talk excitedly about how he had been accepted into Jinki's university with his arms waving, even if Jinki could only half concentrate on his words, in his mind he still saw the captain streaking across the field like a man possessed after the ball. He could see his tricky manoeuvres and the skill behind every move in his mind, it played on and on again in his head like a broken record destined to play the same song over and over. Sometimes Jinki wondered if he was forever destined to be stuck in an eternal loop, like a record scratched and doomed to play the same song forever, except it was his love or silly crush that seemed to be looped inside his head, forever stuck on repeat.

 

 

 

Jinki groaned, whining against his pillow as he felt the sheets being tugged back roughly. He buried his face into the pillows more, trying to ignore the irritating presence disturbing him and robbing him of his dear sleep. He felt like a bear in hibernation being disturbed months too early from his much needed sleep. After five minutes of being poked and prodded, a grumpy, Jinki finally lifted his head up, his hair standing up straight as he glared up at Kibum.

 

“Ah, you’re awake,” Kibum grinned, looking amused, “Finally. Um did you forget you have your first lecture today?” He grinned, when Jinki paled and then groaned loudly, of course he had forgotten, he was too used to being on holiday. “Ah thought you might have forgotten, come on hyung get up!” Kibum murmured, tickling the older boy with his fingers, “come on hyung!” Kibum whined when Jinki remained in his bed. He frowned, and burrowed deeper into the covers, he didn’t feel like getting up, Jinki felt groggy and wanted more sleep. If he had been more awake he probably would’ve laughed at the role reversal – the new university student waking up the older one, as if it was Jinki’s first year instead of his last.

 

“Fine,” Jinki sighed some twenty minutes later, worn down by Kibum’s persistence. Jinki yawned and almost crashed into the wall before he stumbled into the bathroom to shower. Sometimes he hated living with Kibum, but at least he figured he never needed an alarm clock.  Jinki was notoriously bad at getting up he almost always went back to sleep unless forced out of his bed, and Kibum was the persistent type of person. He was not feeling excited about university this semester, perhaps it was because he was feeling nervous after agreeing to be a tutor for one of his courses. He could just see it now – he would probably trip over on his first day, or forget how to write his name, he was going to be such a laughing stock.

 

“Cheer up, grumpy pants, no one will like you with that expression.” Kibum dryly commented over breakfast, Jinki just rolled his eyes ignoring him. Jinki had already given up on any one liking him, he saw no point in having hopes. It was official, guys and girls thought he was weird and ugly, and no one ever wanted to go on a date with him. Love was therefore pointless, irrational and stupid and something Jinki could not believe in any more. Aside from that, Jinki thought it was more important to focus on his studies anyway, to maintain his perfect grades.

 

“Haha,” Jinki laughed moments too late, “No one likes me ever anyways.” He shrugged his shoulders lightly seeming as if he did not care but Kibum knew he did, “I guess I should go, what time are you going to work?” Jinki sighed heavily, wishing that instead of going to class he was going to work a shift in the little café that their friend’s uncle owned. He loved the café like it was his own; it was a cute little café on the edge of the campus. It had felt like home ever since the first time he had gone there, Jinki was not sure why he loved it, but it just had this vibe that he loved and made him feel at home.

 

“Mmm, in an hour, Jjong said he could cope without me this morning.” Kibum shrugged, “You’re covering after lunch right? I have my first lecture then, that’s okay right?” Jinki beamed up at Kibum and nodded his head immediately, feeling a lot better now he knew that he was going to be at work later. Or rather now that he knew Kibum wanted him to cover him, he hated it when Kibum got grouchy and acted like he was the most important employee there.

 

“Good,” Kibum grinned, “You better go hyung, don’t fall asleep in class.” He scolded the older boy, making him feel like his mother was standing in front of him, hands on his hips. Jinki wanted to reply, “yes mum,” but seeing the way Kibum tapped the wooden spoon against his hand, Jinki held back deciding he didn’t want Kibum to hit him with that.

 

 

 

Jinki yawned as he made his first latte of the day, he in a deep breath smelling the beautiful aroma of the coffee beans. He wished the coffee was for him, instead of a paying customer, because he really needed a coffee and the smell was starting to drive him insane. He smiled as he handed over the takeaway cup to the skinny, but young looking guy. He looked too young to be drinking coffee but Jinki figured looks could be deceiving.

 

The café was quiet, Jinki noted as he looked around, smiling he headed towards the kitchen. He could hear Kibum and Jonghyun discussing something in a loud voice, all the shush-ing noises attracted his attention. Jinki snuck along the edge of the bench, ducking down and sticking his face into the kitchen door, inching into the kitchen to hear the conversation.

 

“I’m not lying!” Kibum hissed, Jinki paled, he could just imagine his friend’s expression, “It really was him!” He sounded exasperated, Jinki sighed heavily. Wondering who or what Kibum had spotted, he almost moved away figuring it was some dancer that Kibum had been obsessing over. But something made him stay where he was, hands digging into the wood almost painfully.

 

“So?” Jonghyun sounded bored, “Big deal, I’m sure he’s over him already. And is it that much of a coincidence, you guys both just enrolled at uni, and first year classes are large, probably half of your school is in your lecture.” Jinki frowned slightly, it didn’t sound like it was someone Kibum would be excited to see, he leaned forward to hear better.

 

“I know, but the chances of seeing Choi Minho in my first lecture!” Kibum sounded excited, Jinki froze, feeling his heart begin to race. He squeezed his eyes shut, sitting crouched down on the floor, unable to move and surprised and happy that Kibum had seen Minho, even if it hurt. Oh, he’s going to study here too, ah I wish I had gone overseas or something, well I guess I won’t ever run into him.

 

“Okay, are you going to tell hyung?” Jonghyun asked, “I wonder if there is any point, it will probably hurt him. He’s trying to forget him, isn’t he?”

 

“I’m not sure,” Kibum sounded slightly upset, his voice echoing how Jinki felt, “But it feels wrong not to tell him, I don’t think he is trying to forget him.” Jinki sighed, he felt like calling out ‘guys, I’m right here do you need to talk about me, like I’m not here?’ But then he realised that no one knew he was eavesdropping and smartly he left his mouth shut.

 

“We’ll tell him then, but don’t come ing to me if it doesn’t work out.” Jonghyun sounded irritated, and Jinki snuck out of the kitchen quickly. He grabbed the spray of cleaner, and a cloth, going over to clean the furthest away table from the kitchen. He scrubbed furiously at the surface, his mind a million miles away, he wondered if Minho still looked the same. He wanted to him see him so badly, even if it was stupid and pointless, but he wanted to see him.

 

 

 

 

“Thanks,” Minho offered Taemin a crooked grin as he took the offered cup, “Sorry about that, I just thought I recognised the barista,” Minho shrugged, “I was probably mistaken though.” He sipped the latte, and sighed happily, “God, this is perfect!” He murmured looking dreamy and happy, “Thank you so much Taeminnie,” He smiled happily across at the other boy.

 

“Anytime hyung, guess you’ll be back here for coffee again?” He smirked, “is it that good?” He cocked his head to one side, “you’re such a coffee addict.” Taemin mentioned for what felt like the millionth time, Minho just rolled his eyes ignoring that comment.

 

“Yeah it is amazing.” Minho sighed, “I somehow never imagined there would be such great coffee practically on the campus,” He grinned, “it’s great, and you live so close to here too. I really feel like uni is going to be fantastic!” Minho nodded his head quickly, standing up and walking away with Taemin, “I was so scared and nervous, but today has been great.”

 

“Of course hyung, you’re smart,” Taemin stared enviously at the other boy wishing that his friend wasn’t leaving him behind, “I’m so jealous, I wish I was going here with you now, I’m going to miss you so much.” He sighed heavily, shutting his eyes so his eyes could not water when Minho hugged him tightly, reassuring him completely. “I’m sorry, it’s just going to be so hard without you, hyung.”

 

“I know, I’m sorry,” Minho sighed heavily, “you’ll be fine Taeminnie, I promise.” Minho squeezed the skinny boy tightly, “Don’t stress everything will work out fine, and you know I’ll make time every day to talk to you. We can go and sit in that café, and chat about your day. We should actually do that, because we do have to talk daily.” Minho grinned stepping back from Taemin, who smiled sweetly up at him as he nodded his head eagerly.

 

“Good, you better not break that promise, Minho-hyung,” Taemin stared seriously across at his friend, “I won’t be happy if you do.” Taemin nodded his head, his eyes glinting in the sunlight. Minho breathed in deeply, nodding his head, he would not break that promise, unless it was physically impossible for him to keep it.

 

“Taemin, you’ve known me for how long?” Minho raised one eyebrow, smirking over his latte at Taemin who shrugged. “You know I don’t break promises, so I’m not going to change now that I’m at uni.” He brushed his hand down the front of his trousers, smoothing his jeans down, before glancing over at the café across the street. One of these days he was really going to have to go in there, it had such a nice  outlook – surrounded by leafy green trees, and bushes, it made it look secluded and private and very cosy, like an ideal place to study or read.

 

 

 

Jinki groaned loudly into his pillow again, as Kibum straddled his back, sitting down across his to wake him up. It felt awkward and uncomfortable, the way his friend pinned him down to the bed, Jinki wondered how this was meant to be ‘encouraging’ him to get up when it was physically impossible for him to do anything but lie there with Kibum’s weight on top of him.

 

“Hyung,” Kibum pleaded, “Please, I swear you won’t be alone, it’s a double date.” Kibum batted his eyes at the back of Jinki’s head, as if fluttering his eyes would be effective when Jinki could not even see the action. “I’ll be there, so you won’t be alone.” Kibum nodded his head eagerly, he had arranged a blind double date for the both of them, it was mostly for Jinki’s benefit, but the ones he had alone never worked out very well. Mostly because Jinki didn’t want to go on them and never really tried to talk or do anything to make the other feel comfortable.

 

“No.” Jinki flat out refused to go on another of those horrible dates, they were always a waste of time. “I don’t know why you even bother.” Jinki sighed heavily, “You were the person who told me that no one would ever like someone like me, so why do you keep setting me up like this?” Jinki’s voice was muffled by the pillowcase, but his voice sounded shaky as if he was upset. “Do you enjoy seeing people reject me?” Kibum rolled his eyes and wanted to point out that Jinki needed to try harder, because every time he saw him act like he didn’t care, he knew it was partly because he was shy but that was not a valid excuse.

 

“Hyung,” Kibum sounded exasperated, “Why do you take everything so seriously!” He breathed out loudly, the warm air hitting the back of Jinki’s neck. “I said that in high school, I meant that no one in high school would appreciate you, I didn’t mean that no one would ever like you.”

 

“Well,” Jinki replied glumly, “No one ever does like me.”

 

“Jinki-hyung, don’t be so negative, you have to get over him one day.” Kibum’s brow furrowed, “I know you still like him, but you’re never going to see him again.” Jinki pouted against the pillow, how do you know that? I overheard your conversation with Jjong, so don’t lie. I get it, someone like that would never like me, but I can’t stop myself from liking him, as insane as it sounds.

 

“Whatever, I’m not going on that stupid date. Make Jjong go with you, I don’t care if he has girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever, he can go. Because I am not, and no we’re not discussing it.” He lifted his head up from the pillow before burying in the feathers again. Thankfully Kibum, got off Jinki’s body, sensing that the older male was now in a very bad mood.

 

“Okay, sorry,” Kibum chewed on his lip, “Um, I’ll see you later at work, hope your classes go well.”

 

“Hey,” Jinki turned to look at his friend, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to snap.” He bit his lip looking apologetic. “I know you mean well, but I can’t help the way I feel.” He shrugged, feeling slightly guilty he had lived with Kibum long enough to understand him well. “I’m sorry, I should be more supportive of you, you’re always taking care of me.” Kibum opened his mouth to protest, but seeing Jinki get up he shut it again.

 

“I’ll go to uni with you,” Jinki smiled, “Show you around the campus, did you have trouble finding your class yesterday?” Kibum quickly shook his head, beaming across at Jinki, he had no trouble because Jinki had told him how to get there the day before.

 

 

 

Two hours later, Kibum felt content as he sat on a bench under a tree, with Jinki sprawled next to him, sipping their free coffees. He smiled warmly across at his friend, grateful that he had spent his morning off showing him around the campus, pointing out the shortcuts, and anything useful, it was really helpful. He had even waited in the library while Kibum had his lecture, and now they were just finishing off an early lunch.

 

“Thank you hyung, I really appreciate it.” Kibum nodded as he sipped the last of his coffee, “What time is Jjong expecting you?”

 

“Hm, later, I have class in half an hour, so after that. Are you going to work now?” Jinki swung his legs out in front of himself, completely relaxed. “I guess we’ll soon get our schedules memorised, it is a little annoying at first though.”

 

“Yeah, it just feels weird to finally be at uni, you know?” Kibum glanced across at Jinki, “I mean, after hearing you talk about it for two years, and now I’m here, it feels a little surreal.” He grinned across at Jinki, waiting for the other boy to say something. Jinki stayed silent, and then Kibum noticed how stiffly he was sitting, his eyes staring off in front of him intently. Frowning Kibum glanced across, and then gulped when he saw Minho, a couple of metres away, hugging some boy affectionately.

 

“Oh.” Jinki mumbled, wiping hastily at his eyes before he looked away, he knew he was pathetic. He got up quickly, “I better get going, see you later Kibum,” He mumbled, racing away before the other could say another word. Jinki felt sick, it had been a while since he had last seen Minho, his crush from high school. His unrequited crush, and it was pathetic to still pine after the same boy, for two years. But somehow Jinki never stopped thinking and wondering about him. Somehow he never had managed to push his feelings aside or forget about him.

 

He knew it was wrong, especially when Minho never even knew that he existed. He was after all the geek from the computer club, the second smartest student in the school. Sure in his own way he had been well known, but not amongst the athletic kids. People tended to forget that Jinki was okay at sports, and just tended to assume because he liked computers and science, and was occasionally clumsy, that he at sports. He sighed heavily, wondering why he still liked that kid, why he could just not get over him. Jinki figured at least this was his last year, and after this he would never see him again.