A request made by adgjmptw. Sorry if it took really really really long, it's just that I was focusing on school and I wanted to try writing something different for a change. I hope you enjoy it. ;)

Love is a fallacy. It twists your mind, it defies logic, it provides no reason, no explanation, no argument. Love cannot be explained. It cannot be measured. It cannot be defined. But who is to say that love is not real? Who can say that love is merely a fantasy, an illusion created by the mind. But whatever it is, love has it’s way of changing a person.

I had never been the type of person to change so easily. I find it hard to accept change. In fact, I hated change. I prefer keeping things the way they were. I was so convinced that no change can make my life anymore better, until he came along.

It was the peak of my career. I have been living my life as an idol for 4 years ow and not to bow my own horn but my group has been gaining much popularity not only in Korea but all over Asia.  My schedule was packed yes, but I’ve never been happier in my life. I have my members to look after and take care of me, my family who always got my bak and my fans who support and love me o matter what. I have everything that I’ll ever want, however, the public has other ideas. 

“Nicole-shii, why don’t you ever think of dating?” One of the MCs asked me.

I signed inwardly. ‘Really? We’re doing this again? Is there any day that you guys won’t ask me about my love life?’ I thought to myself. “No, I’d like to focus on my career first. But maybe if I find the right guy.” I smiled at the MC.

“well, what is it that you look for in a guy?”

“I’m not quite sure bit I guess I’ll just know it when I see him.” I smiled at them, fanning my cheeks from embarrassment.

To be honest, it wasn’t the first time someone asked me that question and it was already getting in my nerves but I still can’t help but feel embarrassed whenever I talk about my so called “dream guy”.

“Why is it that you don;t go out with guys Nicole? You’re the social butterfly among us but Hara’s already beaten you into having a public relationship with another idol.” Gyuri asked.

“I don’t know unnie, I guess I just see them all as friends. I haven’t et anyone that I can consider.” I said shaking my head.

“Wow, so many boys.”SeungYeon teased.

“It’s not like that unnie, it’s just that for me they’re all just friends.” I replied pouting.

“Awww, don’t worry unnie, I’m sure you’ll find the right guy soon. Just let fate do it’s work. Love will come in the right time.” JiYoung said, hugging me from behind.

“Aww, thank you JiYoungie.” I replied smiling at her.

“We better go guys, we still have a schedule and Hara, stop daydreaming will you.” Gyuri Announced.

On our way, I thought to myself, ‘Is it really time for me to start seeing others? All throughout my life, being and idol is all I ever thought about. I mean, who needs a boyfriend when you have fans who’ll love you no matter what.’ I pushed the thought out of my mind before focusing on my attention to our schedule at hand.

We were scheduled to have a performance that day in Music Bank but when I first saw him. I heard that they were having a comeback but this time as a whole group. I wasn’t exactly that enthusiastic about meeting him but thanks to  Kyuhyun, I really didn’t have much of a choice. 

“Nicole, Hara, Gyuri, SeungYeon, Jiyoung come here, I want you guys to meet some people.” KyuHyun said pulling us over.

I rolled my eyes at him. I know that the only reason he’s introducing us -- well, mainly me, to guys was because he;s one of the few that really wants me to find a boyfriend, and to be honest, it’s really annoying.

“This is our juniors, EXO.” He said, looking at a group of 12 boys. Automatically, they did their group introduction.

“One, two, three. We are one! Annyeonghasseyo, EXO-imnida.”

“Annyeonghasseyo, Kara-imnida.” W greeted back.

They all introduced themselves individually and to tell you the truth. I only remembered a handful of names. There was the tall guy with pointy ears, who’s name, I believe was Chanyeol, Kai, the dark one, Wonder Girls’ Sohee’s long lost twin Xiumin, and Luhan, the one that looks like a girl. I’m pretty sure that when I was trying hard to recall all the other member’s names, they were already thinking about who was the most handsome. Only when I heard Gyuri introduced herself  that I realized that we were already introducing ourselves.

“Hi, I’m Nicole, I blurted out in English.”

I didn’t bother to correct myself, or to translate myself rather since I’m pretty sure that they can understand at least a few simple sentences in English.

JiYoung was about to initiate a conversation but thankfully we were already being called on stage. W only had ample time to exchange cellphone numbers before we were literally pushed on stage by out manager.

I didn’t think much of those boys during our performance and I thought our conversation about that was over until JiYoung brought it up once again.

“Kai and Sehun seemed like nice guys, don’t you think?”

I squinted my eyes as I tried to recall who was who.

“Wait, Kai is the tall guy with dark skin right?” I asked.

“Well, not that dark but yeah.” JiYoung nodded

“Who was Sehun?” I asked.

“The tall blonde one with a sharp jawline.” Gyuri answered.

“Which one, there’s two of them?” SeungYeon asked as well.

“Wait, there are 2 tall blonde ones?!” I half asked, half shouted.

“Yup, Kris is the taller one while Sehun is the shorter one.” Hara added. I groaned.

“Would you believe that Luhan and Xiumin are the two eldest among them? They look so young.” Gyuri commented.

“Wait, Luhan is the one that looks like a girl and Xiumin is the one who looks like Sohee right?”

They all nodded.

“Can someone please help me remember all of them They’re all so confusing.” I cried out exasperatedly. They all laughed.

“Who are the ones you remember?” Hara asked.

“I remember Kai, Luhan, Xiumin and Chanyeol. There’s also a guy named Suho and then Kris and Sehun whom you guys mentioned.” I said, counting them off my fingers.

“You left out D.O, the one who looks so scared all the time, Tao who has those dark circles under his eyes that I’m not quite sure if he’s just tired, an error in make-up or he’s just really born like that, Baekhyun, who was wearing such a heavy eyeliner, Chen, the one with prominent cheekbones, and Lay, the guy who couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.” JiYoung finished, smiling.

I spun my head around so quickly that it made my head spin.

“What do you mean couldn’t keep his eyes off of me?” Nicole asked sounding confused. 

“Well he kept glancing at you so I think he might have found you interesting.”  JiYoung added, earning me some elbowing from Gyuri and SeungYeon. I rolled my eyes.

“Look guys, don’t assume. Just because he was looking at my direction does not mean he was looking at me. Maybe we really was staring at nothing and he didn’t realize that he was already staring at me.” I said in a matter of fact tone.

“The mind sees, what it chooses to see.” SeungYeon said in a professional like voice.

“Whatever guys, can we change the topic now?” I groaned while rolling my eyes and putting on my headphones.

I closed m eyes and tried to push all thoughts at the back of my mind. Before I could doze off to dreamland however, my phone rang, signaling that someone sent me a text message.

“Annyeong, Nicole-sumbaenim. This is EXO’s Lay.”

I smiled at his formality; I really don’t mind it if he just call me Nicole and drop the formalities. I texted him back, suddenly revealing all giddy inside.

“Call me Nicole, hi Lay. Mind if I ask you, how did you get my number?” 

It wasn’t long before he texted back.

“I got it from JiYoung sunbae, if you don’t mind.”

Remind me to strangle JiYoung if I ever get the chance.

“Its fine.” I texted him once again.

“Nice to meet you Nicole-shii. I look forward in seeing you once again”

“Same here.”

I put my  phone away and went to sleeping. hoping that they won’t notice the smile on my face.

I tried my best no to think about Lay after that but it was near impossible to as he’d still send me text messages on a daily basis. I’d reply with a greeting as well but I just did it out of courtesy. But as time passes, I started to look forward to his messages. our exchanges of text became more and more frequent and there are also times when I’d be the one to text him first. I would also start feeling disappointed whenever he wouldn’t text me back despite knowing the fact that he may be having practice or in the middle of a schedule. It wasn’t long before our exchange of text messages evolved into late night calls. As the days passed I began to want to talk to him more and more,. We rarely see each other but my heart feels like I’ve known him for ages.

I was surprised that when i saw him, he paid very little attention to me. instead of talking to me, he’d prefer to talk to his other members or to practice dancing. Pathetically, I tried to bring his attention to me but he acted like he didn’t know me at all. Like a child who didn’t get what he wanted, I gloomily carried on with our schedule. During one of our breaks, I pulled out my phone, I felt my heart race and a smile threatened to creep up my face but i hid it quickly as I saw Lay’s name on the screen. I read,

“Are you okay?”

I looked up my phone and in the corner of my eye, I noticed Lay looking at me with concern.  Ignoring his stare, I turned my attention to Hara who was practicing in the corner of the room. I mentally shook my head thinking ‘Oh no, this time I’m the one playing hard to get. You can’t change my heart so easily.’ Lay tried to approach and talk to me but despite his attempts, I actually made it a point to distance myself from him. As we were taking our leave, I felt Lay’s hand grab mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. I suddenly felt my heart race and I instinctively pulled my hand away. I noticed that lay looked slightly discouraged by my actions but that time I really couldn’t care less. I was feeling hurt and disappointed that time for acting so stupid and for making an of myself.

When I arrived home that night, I switched my phone on silent mode, laid down on my bed and closed my eyes. I said to myself ‘You don’t need a love life Nicole, what you’re getting yourself into is bad news. You’re life is already perfect. You have everything you could ever need. You don’t like him.’ I repeated those lines over and over again until sleep finally swept over me.

I woke up at the sound of someone banging on my door. I groggily got up, and opened the door. Practically pouncing on me, JiYoung greeted me excitedly and asked

“Who’s it from?”

“Who’s what from?” I asked, still half asleep.

“Don’t pretend you don’t know. We know it’s for you. It has your name on it.”

“Okay, first off, I have no idea what you’re talking about and second can you at least wait for me to be fully awake before bombarding me with all these questions.” I said rubbing my eyes to clear my vision.

JiYoung ran back downstairs and I headed to the washroom for me to splash cold water on my face to wake me up. After making sure that I was wide awake, I headed downstairs to be greeted by 4 pairs of eyes staring expectantly at me.

“What? Why are you staring at me like that? Do I have something on my face?” I asked defensively.

“Just tell us who it’s from.” Gyuri prompted.

“Can someone at least tell me what the heck are we talking about here.” 

For an answer, Hara handed me a bouquet of flowers. Upon closer look, I saw a note. I took it and read it silently.

I’m sorry for whatever I may have said or done. Please forgive me?

XO

I paused as I thought about one person. He was the only one who signed everything that he sent to me with an “XO”. The sudden thought of him made my heart race and I have to admit, it made my stomach feel fluttery all of a sudden. I honestly didn’t know that to do. In one hand I liked talking to him and I enjoyed his company a lot, on the other hand I didn’t know if he was really serious about me, or if he’s even thinking about taking this somewhere. I didn’t want to assume anything just yet. I wanted it to come from him  instead.

“So, who’s it from?” SeungYeon asked.

“I don’t know, he didn’t sign his name.” I lied quickly, still staring at the note.

“Oohhh.... A secret admirer.” JiYoung teased.

“You know what, why don’t we investigate about this later. I want to go back to bed.” I pretended to whine.

“Alright Nicole, we have a day off today so you can take as much rest as you want. You haven’t been sleeping properly since last week.”  Gyuri said.

I pretended to drag myself back to my room before plopping myself on my bed and puling out my phone from under my pillow. I looked at it and saw a familiar name in my cellphone screen.

Hope you like the flowers I sent. Please forgive me for whatever I may have said or done.

I stared at the phone for a while, thinking of a decent reply. I decided to just past whatever happened and pretend that everything was okay, but in reality I was really feeling bad about what happened yesterday.

What were the flowers for? And don’t worry, nothing is wrong.

I texted him back. I buried my face on my pillow hoping to get some more sleep before my phone buzzed again.

I know that you’re upset about something yesterday and I was concerned. I liked seeing your bubbly side.

I smiled at his words. I guess he’s not like the other guys out there who are all words. I was about to reply to his message y phone buzzed again.

I was actually wondering if  you’d like to have dinner with me tonight. You know if you’re free.

I took a deep breath before texting back a “yes” and instantly regret it after that. I wanted to text that I wasn’t available for that night but a part of  me said no. 

Great! I’ll pick you up at 6 is that okay?

I groaned but smiled at the same time. I decided to it up and just face him.

Sure

I texted back. I finally realized what I had done. ‘What the heck was that?’ I asked myself as I plopped down on my bed for the nth time today.

At around 4, I decided to get ready. I took a long bath, standing under the shower for as long as possible and dreading the time when I’d have to get out. I’d never been the one to go on dates. I’ve hated going out on dates because I know that guys will just try to impress girls but after their dates, they’re nothing but arrogant jerks.

At exactly 6pm, the doorbell rang and I instantly looked out the window and saw Lay’s car parked in front of our dorm. Panic instantly went through my mind and then I asked myself, ‘Why am I panicking, it’s not like he’s going to eat me alive.’ I thought to myself.

I nervously headed downstairs to meet Lay but to my surprise, Gyuri had already opened the door and let him in. He was standing there looking ever so handsome and holding a bouquet of flowers in his arms. I gulped nervously as I slowly descended down the stairs. Gyuri was smiling at me widely which made me feel a lot better.

“Enjoy your date. Just make sure to be back before 12 okay.” Gyuri reminded me.

“Alright unnie.” I replied as I watched Lay came forward.

“Ready to go?” He asked me.

“Uhu.”

“These are for you.” he said handing me the bouquet.

“Thank you, they’re beautiful Lay.” I smiled at him.

We headed outside and went on with our date. He was really a gentleman I must say. When we were about to get into our car, he opened the door for me and waited for me to get in before he went around and got in as well. The brought me to a fancy looking restaurant where in a waiter lead us to our table at the VIP area. He pulled out my chair for me and the servers served us our food and we begun eating. I instantly felt my heart race as we begun talking. I was feeling awkward at first but as time passed, I began to be more comfortable with Lay. The night progressed and we were definitely having a great time. As we were coming to the end of our date, I wasn’t expecting him to stand up and ask me to dance. Blushing furiously, I extended my hand to his and we began dancing. It really felt like a fairytale. I never knew that meeting one guy could make me change so easily. I blushed as he pulled me closer and whispered to my ear.

“I know this may sound crazy, and I may be breaking some rules here but can you be my girlfriend?” he asked, eyes looking hopeful.

It took me a full minute to fully comprehend what he’s saying but after replaying his question in my head for about a thousand times, I looked at him straight in the eye and said the word that changed my life.

“Yes.”

“Really? Yes!”

Lay picked me up from my waist and began to spin me around in circles. I laughed at how he turned into this little boy after just a second.

My life has never been the same since then. I may not admit it in front of other people but I have to say, it has been so much more better. Things became much more brighter whenever Lay is around and I felt that I can face all problems that may come my way. I felt happier. Lay has changed me so much. Now I am proud to say that I am Nicole Jung, and this is my love story.