"So, what is it you called me out here for?" Jiyong asked. 

Jaejoong chuckled as he handed Jiyong a cup of coffee. "Just to talk," he answered.

"Well, if we're only talking, you might as well give me a can of beer or something," he laughed.

Jaejoong smiled wistfully. "It's about... Sasaeng fans."

Jiyong frowned. "Okay, now you definitely need to get me a beer... Or at least a smoke."

Jaejoong fished out his cigarette pack and handed it to Jiyong as he said, "Big Bang has sasaeng fans too, right?"

The short rapper nodded as he lit the cigarette. "Yeah. Though, I don't see them all that often. They're ninjas. They hide and then... Bam! They're there, but they only follow--no touching."

"Lucky. Ours... Ah... What can I say? Rude. Loud. And they're always touching us in the most uncomfortable places. They take our things and text us." Jaejoong shivered at the memories and raised the coffee cup to his lips only to spit out the liquid and fan his tongue to cool it down.

Jiyong laughed. "Hyung! You're so funny! But... I feel your pain. I'm sorry about all of it." 

"No. We're idols. We all expected this."

Jiyong shrugged as he took a drag of his cigarette, tossing Jaejoong the pack back. "I don't know how they become like this though."

Jaejoong shook his head and glared at his coffee, suddenly not wanting anymore of it. "They're insane. There's nothing more or less."

"They're humans," he said, stomping out his cigarette and taking a sip from his coffee. "Their minds should work like ours, no?"

"I don't know. It doesn't seem like they're humans though." Jaejoong was about to throw his coffee cup, still full, into the trash but Jiyong took it from him. 

"They are. Trust me. And we are too. They forget sometimes and that's why they're like this," Jiyong said, grinning. "I have to go now. I told Seunghyun that I was out getting coffee. I should be nice and bring him back some, too, but I won't tell him where it came from." He winked and Jaejoong grinned.

"Oh! Wait! Jiyong-ah!" Jaejoong called after him. "Do you guys have taxis or vans always following after a performance or anything?" 

The rapper frowned. "Taxis and vans? No. Why do you ask?"

Jaejoong bit his lip and shook his head. "No reason."

"You know, you can always ask Hongki too. FT Island has a lot of sasaeng fans."

Jaejoong only nodded. But as far as he knew, JYJ and TVXQ were the only bands who had vans and taxis following them all the time. 
 

"Where were you last night?" Yoochun asked Jaejoong as they stretched out their muscles.

"With Jiyong," he answered, wincing as his back cracked. 

"What'd the shortie want?" Yoochun snickered.

"No, I called him out for coffee," Jaejoong replied. "We were talking about... Sasaeng fans."

Frowning, Yoochun gazed at Jaejoong. "What happened?"

Jaejoong sighed and sat down, pulling Yoochun down with him. "Our fans are the only ones who stalk us by paid cars," he hissed.

"That's not true!" Yoochun protested. "Almost two out of five times when Super Junior drives any place, they've got cars behind them and get into accidents. At least our fans are careful drivers."

"Well, what I mean is that we're the only ones who've noticed and I think our fans invented the taxis epidemic."

"What? But, Joongie--"

"No! Really! I asked Jiyong about the taxis and he said he didn't know. I called Hongki and he didn't know either. Big Bang and FT Island are the top two bands with stalker fans just behind ours. If they don't know what the taxis are, then we must've created them. And besides, before there had been no cars behind us and then suddenly, bam! None of the other bands' fan bases could've started it because we were the first ones to come out!"

Yoochun rolled his eyes. "Joongie, you're tired. Maybe you need rest."

"I'm not crazy if that's what you're saying!" 

"You're always crazy," Yoochun giggled as he walked away. 

The boys of JYJ were practicing hard for their upcoming concert. But even the thought of cheering fans loving their every move gave Jaejoong an empty feel. What were Changmin and Yunho doing right now? Were they eating well, sleeping well? Would they come to see the concert? How are they?

Jaejoong was one to worry excessively--he and Yoochun. There were many ways for Jaejoong to release his worries. He could sit and talk with Yoochun. He could joke with Junsu. He could cook food for Changmin or talk with him. He could also have Yunho hold him and tell him he's too stressed. He could hear the leader's soft voice already. "You're working too hard, Joongie. Take a rest." And Jaejoong would comply with Yunho's gentle demands every time. But neither Yunho nor Changmin was here this time; he only had Junsu and Yoochun. 

"Jaejoong hyung," Junsu said softly, placing a hand on the older's shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Jaejoong bit his lip. He wanted to nod his head and reassure his dongsaeng that he was doing fine, that he'd be alright; he wanted to lie to Junsu, and that wasn't something he could easily execute towards the tenor. Burying his head into Junsu's chest, Jaejoong's fingers gripped the thin, sweat soaked fabric of his wife beater. Heavy tears mingled with Junsu's perspiration as the younger quickly adapted to the situation, cradling the older singer in his lap. A calm hand rubbed between Jaejoong's shoulder blades. 

Yunho would rub there sometimes, Jaejoong remembered. The large patch of ink that spread across his shoulders had been a vital place of importance on Jaejoong's body. There he'd tattooed his soul, the soul of TVXQ, and the touch of his leader. Jaejoong thought that with Junsu the spot that the leader used to calm him would lessen his tears, but it didn't. Heartbreak washed over Jaejoong's body as well as fear and stress. 

"You need to rest," Junsu murmured into Jaejoong's ear. "You're overworking yourself."

"You sound like Yunnie-ah," Jaejoong said quietly. Though he meant for his line to be funny, neither he nor Junsu laughed or smiled. "I'm sorry. That wasn't funny." 

Talking of Yunho or Changmin was a grave matter. They didn't know whether the two felt the same as JYJ, heartbroken and clinging onto old memories. The intention of forming JYJ wasn't to get away from Yunho and Changmin; it was to get away from SM, but even then, misunderstandings arose, and Changmin and Yunho ridiculed the three. Over time, they slowly understood. Yunho mentioned Jaejoong often, and more than once it was said that Changmin cried while reading the tweets of the missing members. It led Jaejoong to wonder if Yunho and Changmin really thought about them as much as they did. 
 

It took hours for Jaejoong to wake. During the time where the eldest had cried himself into a restless sleep, Yoochun and Junsu discussed their hyung's current emotional status. 

"He's really... Ah... How can I say it without using the word crazy?"

"You already said it, but I agree. After the concert, he needs time off." Junsu glanced at Yoochun as the older lit a cigarette. 

"Yeah. We all do," Yoochun answered as he took a drag of his cigarette. "Maybe we should all stop by in the States. I want to stop by... Just for the fun of it maybe. A vacation of some sorts." He took another drag of the cigarette.

Junsu cringed. "You know, usually I'd oppose of you smoking--and Jaejoong hyung too--but with our current situation, I understand."

"It gets our nerves calm, I guess," Yoochun answered.

"I smoke to shorten my life." Neither Yoochun nor Junsu had answered. 

The two youngest turned around to see Jaejoong wrapped in a thin blanket, standing in the doorframe of the balcony. Yoochun gestured for the singer to come join him and Junsu. The older placed himself in between his fellow bandmates, tugging them close to his body for warmth. 

"Joongie hyung, why do you think so negatively nowadays?" Junsu asked softly as ran his fingers through Jaejoong's tangled hair. 

"It makes reality seem less harsh," Jaejoong answered, stealing the cigarette from Yoochun's fingers. "If I think of the worst possible scenarios, then when it doesn't happen, I'll be more at peace." He took a long drag of the cigarette and sighed. "But even as I do that, I could never think of scenarios bad enough and the sasaeng fans come. And because of them, I fear my life."

Yoochun hugged Jaejoong tightly as the older took another inhale of smoke. The youngest hooked his arms through Jaejoong's and laid his head on his shoulder. Putting out the cigarette in the ask tray, Jaejoong lifted his head to glance at the stars, but Yoochun suddenly pressed the older's head down to prevent him from looking up.

"Don't look at the sky, hyung," he said.

"Why?" Jaejoong said, moving Yoochun's hand away from his neck.

Up in the sky, twinkling brightly and as brilliantly as ever, five stars connected by an invisible line shone down upon the three singers. 

"Cassiopeia..." Jaejoong whispered, memories of the times when TVXQ was still five performing together--the Tokyo Dome, the "Stand By U" blue ocean, and the red sea of fans at concerts. 

Jaejoong suddenly retreated back into the apartment, leaping into his bed. He didn't cry himself to sleep, but the harsh hammering of his wanton heart cried for Yunho and Changmin. As he fell asleep, he dreamt of their times together--filming the Saipan Vacation or all the music recordings--and for once, sasaeng fans did not disturb his peaceful dreams. 

Again, a few days later, Jaejoong sat outside near the Han River, though this time, Jiyong wasn't with him. Playing with his phone, Jaejoong debated whether he should call Yoochun out to meet him. Rapid waters did wonders in keeping secrets, he decided, but only Yoochun could give him plausible advice. 

Jaejoong texted Yoochun. "Hey! Come out to the Han River. Let's go for a walk, Chunnie-ah!! <3"

The singer suddenly remembered that he had changed his number and didn't tell Yoochun, but not more than three minutes later Jaejoong received a text back. But it wasn't Yoochun's number.

"Who are you? And why are you texting Chunnie oppa?! Even calling him Chunnie?! Who the hell are you?!" 

Jaejoong nearly dropped his phone when it suddenly buzzed again.

"Oh... I bet I know who this is. Joongie oppa, no?"

Throw the phone in the river, a voice at the back of Jaejoong's mind said. You can always get a new one.

"Oppa, why'd you change your number? Did you know that I kept calling your old phone hoping you'd pick up?"

Just throw it in the river and go home.

"Well, Oppa. Have a good night. Dream of me!!"

Oh, I dream of you, the voice drawled sarcastically, with bared fangs, claws, and red eyes. 

Jaejoong collapsed on the ground. How could one girl frighten a man so much with just everyday words?