“I can’t believe that you actually don’t drink, Professor,” Hyukjae said, as they left the restaurant together after a rather full and satisfying meal. “It’s not every day that you run into someone who doesn’t shame you for not being able to hold your alcohol.”

“I know, right?” Donghae answered with a grin. “I just don’t like the taste of alcohol. Why pay to get drunk out of your senses and risk getting taken advantage of in the middle of the streets?”

“Shh, not so loud, someone’s gonna hear you!”

Hyukjae quickly glanced around the area to see if anyone heard them talking. “You know, people drink to forget their worries.”

“Drinking is expensive,” Donghae said with a pout, casually brushing their hands together as they walked side by side. The student quickly withdrew his hand, afraid that Donghae was in his ‘don’t-touch-me-in-public’ mood again, but as soon as he let his guard down, he felt the professor’s hand brushing against his once more.

“Professor…?”

“Hmm?”

Hyukjae glanced pointedly at their hands, almost touching each other again, before looking up into the professor’s eyes. Donghae had a rather indifferent look on his face, so Hyukjae thought he was just overreacting again. “Um, nothing. Where were we?”

“You said that people drank to forget their worries and I said that it was an expensive way to do that,” the professor answered with a chuckle. “I’ve got a better solution for that. .”

“S-?”

Hyukjae blinked softly and bit his lips. Was this what meant to Donghae? Just a way to make him forget?

“Yeah, . Tons and tons of ,” Donghae joked as he glanced at the student. “ is free after all— I mean, condoms aren’t, but at least you’re conscious about what you’re getting yourself into and who you’re getting involved with. Also, is a lot more satisfying than alcohol. Only if you’re with someone compatible, of course.”

“Ah, I see.”

Hyukjae’s thoughts were in turmoil. Donghae liked . Donghae loved . Hyukjae thought he liked too, especially since it was a means of holding on to the frail relationship he had with the professor. He had with Donghae because he loved him, but also because he wanted Donghae to stay with him.

On the other hand, Donghae was just having with him because he helped him forget about other things. Hyukjae thought that maybe it was something he should kinda be proud of — at least that meant he was still of some use to Donghae — but that meant that Donghae was just using him to release some steam, and that was it.

He wasn’t going to get his romantic feelings reciprocated because Donghae didn’t feel anything for him. was just . In fact, what Donghae had always been doing kind of made sense now. How the professor teased and flirted with him until he was hooked — and as soon as he was sure that Hyukjae kept wanting to have with him, started putting some distance between them.

And then when Hyukjae felt the distance, Donghae would reel him in once more, keeping him entertained enough so that Hyukjae would get his hopes up again.

So… they were kind of just using each other after all.

Hyukjae felt a tear running down his cheek and blinked in surprise. When had he started to cry? He didn’t even realise that his eyes were red and b with tears. He stopped in his tracks and quickly turned around so that Donghae wouldn’t see his ugly crying face. What if Donghae hated it when he cried and decided to leave him? Donghae could just find about anyone else to have with. It was just a means of de-stressing for him anyway.

“Hyukjae, are you crying?”

Oh, . He heard me.

“N-No, I’m not,” the student quickly replied, brushing the tears away and wiping them on the side of his shirt. “Some sand just blew into my eyes.”

“Let me see,” Donghae said, as he backtracked in his footsteps and approached Hyukjae. “Don’t hide your pretty face from me,” he said, when it was obvious that Hyukjae didn’t want to be seen crying. “Was it something I said?” 

Hyukjae just sniffled again and shook his head. “It’s nothing, I promise,” he muttered softly. “I’ll be alright in a bit.”

Donghae looked worried as he waited for Hyukjae to calm down. He wrapped an arm around Hyukjae’s shoulders and was surprised when Hyukjae shrugged it off. “Hyukjae?”

“Don’t,” Hyukjae started, before starting to cry again. “Please don’t touch me like that.”

“Like what, like this?” Donghae asked in confusion. “I’m only trying to comfort you.” He pulled Hyukjae closer and hugged him tightly, letting the student cry onto his shoulder as he patted his head comfortingly. “There, there, my little Hyukkie, everything’s gonna be alright.”

“It isn’t,” Hyukjae hiccoughed, furiously wiping away the tears that kept streaming down his face. “I-It’s not going to be alright.”

Donghae had a serious look on his face. “Is this about what I think you’re thinking about?” he asked gently, tucking his hair behind his ears. “You know that it’s not like that.”

“Then what is it like?” Hyukjae half-yelled, half-sobbed as fresh tears spilled out from his eyes. “Why won’t you tell me? Why do you keep making me assume things about our relationship? Why do you act all flirty with me one second and then avoid me like the plague the next? Why is it that you can touch me in public, but I can’t? Do you not like me that much? Am I just a throwaway to you?”

Hyukjae shivered and shuddered in the stunned professor’s arms. Of all the things that he thought would happen tonight, this was not one of them. He didn’t even know that Hyukjae had been thinking of all these kinds of thoughts lately. Sure, he was an anatomy professor and knew vaguely from Hyukjae’s body language that the student felt insecure with him, but he was not a mind-reader like Siwon practically and literally was. Donghae wasn’t an expert in observing micro-expressions either, yet he blamed himself for missing all the cues and causing so much hurt to Hyukjae.

It was honestly the last thing he wanted to do to him.

The chilly night wind blew across the street, enveloping the duo who was still standing in the middle of nowhere. Since the weather had started cooling down for the past few days, there were only a handful of people still out on the streets in the late evening like them. None of the passers-by spared either of them a glance, and Hyukjae was rather thankful for that. He definitely didn’t need more random people finding out how ugly he was when he cried.

“Are you feeling better now?” Donghae asked softly, kissing the crown of Hyukjae’s head. Hyukjae was shocked. Did the professor just kiss him in public? After mostly avoiding skinship with him all day while they were out?

Oh, wait… Never mind. Of course he is, he’s back on his turf. They were miles away from the uni. There was no risk of anyone finding out that they were professor and student when they were here in Gangnam.

He didn’t know how it made him feel, though. Maybe, just a teensy bit better than before.

“I’m gonna assume that no, you’re not feeling any better, because you’ve still got a little frown on your face,” Donghae said, cupping Hyukjae’s freezing face and pulling the student closer to himself. “Will it go away if I kiss it better?”

Hyukjae blushed lightly and groaned. “You can try and see if you want.” Though why you would want to kiss an ugly crying monkey like me I don’t really under—

“Mmmmmmuahhh!”

Dongha