Chapter 2: The beginning of doubt.

she knows
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[May 21| Sunday] 

 

An exhausted Kim Dahyun found herself sitting by Minatozaki Sana's kitchen counter, trying to access her Google Drive account to get some work done. Not everything she needed was on there, but at least she could look over some lecture slides. It wasn't the best, but it could have been much worse. 

 

Dahyun opened Sana's web browser and found an ungodly amount of tabs open, none of which seemed to be school-related. She silently judged Sana. No one should need more than 6 opened tabs at any given time.

 

Refusing to look at that mess any longer, Dahyun opened an incognito tab and attempted to log on to her Google Drive. She was met with some resistance. 

 

Ugh… Who invented Two-factor Authentication anyway? Dahyun groaned at the minor inconvenience when she realized she had to take out her phone. Google refused to let her into her account because she was signing on from an unrecognized device. 

 

Dahyun quickly pulled out her phone from her pocket. 

 

. Her inbox had been flooded by texts from Jihyo. A good chunk was sent not too long ago. The last one ironically sounded most ominous. 

 

(1:00 AM) Jihyo: Take care of yourself, Dahyun.

 

It was a warning which she couldn't leave on read. 

 

(1:13 AM) Dahyun: Thanks for checking on me, Ji! 

(1:13 AM) Dahyun: But don't worry, I've got everything under control. 

(1:14 AM) Dahyun: I'm borrowing Sana's laptop to do work.

 

Dahyun knew she would still have to face the wrath of Jihyo when she returned home later that day. She would probably never hear the end of it considering she did exactly what she had said she wouldn't do. But that was a later problem. 

 

For now, she had to focus on studying for that midterm. No more distractions. Just her, Sana's laptop, and her lecture slides. Sana was probably sound asleep anyway so it shouldn't be difficult to keep her attention where she needed it.

 

And so, Dahyun tried her best to study. She studied on the kitchen counter; then after an hour, moved to the dining table; and then another hour after that, she migrated to the couch. She had to keep moving or else her exhaustion would catch up to her. 

 

Admittedly, the couch was probably a mistake. The plush cushions were far too comfortable and Dahyun soon found it difficult to keep her eyes open. She turned to lie on her stomach, stretching her body in its prone position as she placed Sana's laptop in front of her.

 

For a while, it seemed to be working. She was able to get through a few more slides. But then her eyelids started getting heavier.

 

Stay awake… 

 

Have to… fight the urge… to sleep… 

 

The couch's soft fabric lulled her to dreamland, pulling her gently away from her responsibilities. Dahyun's body relaxed and her eyes finally shut. Sana's laptop eventually shut off too.

 

Contrary to what she'd promised Sana, Dahyun spent the night on the couch. 

 

 

By the time Dahyun woke up again, it was already late morning; 11:17 AM according to the clock on the wall across from her. As it turned out, Dahyun's regular morning alarm (set at 7:30 AM every day) failed to ring because her phone ran out of battery sometime during the night. This day was clearly off to a slow start. Hopefully, it didn't get any worse. 

 

Dahyun sat up from Sana's couch, stretched her arms, and let out a big yawn.

 

"You didn't come up," Sana said monotonously somewhere behind her, giving Dahyun a fright. 

 

Dahyun quickly spun around. "Huh?"

 

“You said you would come up, but you didn’t.” Sana folded her arms and pouted, brows furrowing slightly. 

 

Dahyun's shoulders felt heavy with guilt. She did promise to go up, but it wasn't like she stayed on the couch on purpose. It was an accident. 

 

“Sorry, Sana, I was just finishing--”

 

“Was it something I said?”

 

"Huh?" Dahyun shook her head. “No, Sana, I was just--”

 

“Something I did?”

 

“It’s really not that--”

 

“Then what is it?” Sana grumbled.

 

Dahyun was taken aback. “Sana, I can’t even get a word in.”

 

“Sorry…” Sana took a deep breath in and rubbed her temples. “I--I just-- I don’t know what I did to upset you.”

 

“I'm not upset at you,” Dahyun insisted. And she really wasn't lying. 

 

But Sana wasn't convinced. “Last night… you didn't even want to stay with me and then-- Nevermind.” Sana dropped her head and walked to her kitchen. 

 

Dahyun gave a short chase. “Hey, look at me,” she said, turning Sana's cheek her way. “I'm really not upset at you. I’m just-- I have a lot of things I need to do.”

 

Sana nodded her head. “Okay…”

 

“Okay...” 

 

And that was the end of it. 

 

Sana didn't even ask her what she had going on. It stung quite a bit, if Dahyun were to be completely honest. She didn't really expect much, but a little check up would have been nice. Nothing. Sana just kept going about her day, preparing herself some food, as if Dahyun wasn't standing right there.

 

Dahyun excused herself to the bathroom to freshen up before leaving.

 

As the cold tap water hit her face and woke her up even more, Dahyun began to wonder if this had happened with Sana before. It wasn't really a fight. Just a simple misunderstanding. They had always bickered in the past, but was this something that actually upset her? If Jihyo hadn't pointed it out, would she just have let it slide? 

 

She truly didn't know how to feel, but Dahyun definitely didn't want to think negatively of Sana. She couldn't possibly believe that Sana didn't care about her-- especially after all of the years they had been best friends. 

 

Sana was just hard to read at times. That's all. She was not a ty friend. 

 

Dahyun grabbed the spare toothbrush Sana left out for her from the many times she'd stayed over and began brushing her teeth. Arguably, that was a sign that Sana paid attention to her and cared, right? Or maybe Sana was just lazy to get rid of it. 

 

Stop. You're overthinking. Dahyun scolded herself. She needed to hurry and leave so she could do other things and stop her mind from digging itself into a hole.

 

Before she exited the bathroom, Dahyun puffed up her cheeks, patted them down, and took a deep breath in. She was a ball of stress that just wanted to leave all her worries behind. 

 

Dahyun quickly shuffled back down the spiral staircase and found Sana sitting by the dining table with some cereal, milk, and buttered toast in front of her. 

 

“Do you-- um-- want to have brunch?” Sana asked, her brown puppy-dog eyes staring right at Dahyun.

 

Dahyun wondered if that spread had been a peace offering. Still, she knew she couldn't stay. 

 

“Sorry, Sana. I’ve already stayed here too long.” Dahyun shook her head and grabbed her lanyard on the counter. 

 

She backed away slowly and headed towards the front door. 

 

“Right, okay… Uhh-- text me when you get home?” 

 

“Sure.” 

 

Dahyun waved goodbye before turning to go.

 

Don't look back. It's a trap. 

 

 

By the time Dahyun had reached her apartment's parking garage, it was nearly noon. She hadn't had a meal in about 24 hours and she was definitely starving. At least she still had the bulgogi rice plate from the night before.

 

Thank goodness for Jihyo!

 

Before going upstairs, Dahyun listed the most important things she needed to do in her head:

Shower (maybe)

Eat!!!

Ask Jihyo for forgiveness (not optional)

Finish studying last two lecture slides for Software Engineering midterm

 

She would figure out the rest later.

 

Dahyun fully expected to be met with Jihyo's scolding the moment she walked through the front door, but before she could even get in, she heard laughter from the inside. Jihyo had company over.

 

Bless… Dahyun nearly jumped for joy. No painfully long lecture. Not yet, at least.

 

Punching in the keycode into the number pad, Dahyun hummed a victory tune as she opened the front door. 

 

"Jihyo, I'm home!" Dahyun announced. She made her way in and saw who Jihyo had been talking to. 

 

"Hey, Dahyun!" Chaeyoung greeted her warmly. She was sitting by Jihyo at the dining table. "You're finally here. I was worried you forgot."

 

. She actually did forget. 

 

Sometime in the previous week, Dahyun had made plans with Chaeyoung to work on their presentation for their internship. She had marked it on her calendar and set notifications, but her phone was still dead and she didn't check her calendar when she was on Sana's laptop. 

 

Jihyo let out a laugh, noticing the panic on Dahyun’s face. "She definitely forgot..."

 

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, Chaeng! It totally lapsed my mind. And my phone died so I didn't get a reminder," Dahyun apologized profusely. "I hope you haven't been waiting long."

 

“It’s no problem at all. I was just catching up with Jihyo.” Chaeyoung chuckled and then raised a brow. "You didn't charge your phone last night?"

 

"I couldn't." Dahyun rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. 

 

"This one didn't come home until now," Jihyo mentioned as she walked over and put an arm around Dahyun.

 

Chaeyoung's eyes grew wide. "Oh… I-- uh-- didn't know you were--"

 

Dahyun's cheek flushed a bright red hue at the insinuation.  "Oh no-- uhh-- it's not what you think!" She waved both her hands in denial. "I was just helping another friend with some stuff. I don't have a girlfriend or anything like that."

 

"Good," Chaeyoung beamed. 

 

There was a brief moment of silence before Dahyun cleared . "Well, I'm going to go take a shower now... so we can get to work."

 

"No rush! I'm not going anywhere until we're satisfied with our presentation."

 

Dahyun pushed Jihyo (who had a smug look on her face) off and bolted to the bathroom. 

 

Luckily it didn't take her long to shower and she was able to be out within a few minutes. Chaeyoung didn't seem to mind at all anyway. She was still having a good conversation with Jihyo when Dahyun came back into the living room. 

 

"Do you want anything to eat, Chaeng?" Dahyun was still starving after all, but she didn't want to be rude and not offer her guest any food. 

 

"I'm good-- thanks. I had a big brunch before coming over."

 

Granted, she really didn't have groceries in the fridge besides a few microwavable meals. All the fresh food in there was Jihyo's. She enjoyed meal prepping. Dahyun was more of a take-out kind of girl.

 

"Oh, that's good. I didn't actually have anything with nutritional value to feed you-- only Trader Joe's mac and cheese."

 

"Hey, their mac and cheese is pretty good! I enjoy it on occasion."

 

"Well, if you get hungry later, your meal's on me," Dahyun offered.

 

"Will you make me some?" Jihyo

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Thank you!
dubsdubu
Thanks for joining me on this wild ride. I had fun writing it. If you take away anything from this story, please advocate for yourselves in all your relationships 🙏🤍 because you deserve it.

Comments

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Ashley370
#1
i loved the push pull
Shan18 #2
Chapter 6: This was really great. Seeing their relationship progress and heal made the ending all the more sweeter. Thank you for writing this!
kopijeli
#3
Chapter 6: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS ALL SEEM TOO REAL OMG THE LETTER HIT ME HARD SEEMS LIKE SOMEONE I KNOW WROTE IT SKSLSLSJLHSK
THANK YOU FOR THIS WONDERFUL STORY, AUTHOR! IT'S REALLY NICE THAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT SELF-AWARENESS, ACKNOWLEDGING TOXIC TRAITS, AND WILLINGNESS TO GROW. THIS IS THE BEST KIND OF CONTENT THAT I WOULD I ASK FOR. I REALLY LOVED IT SO THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN! 🖤
_kimmypot
#4
Chapter 2: All the skipped classes and works is giving me anxiety. But I love this story so far and I am not complainingggggggg! 😭
i_seulrene_u
#5
Chapter 6: I was rly scared they would end up being tragic, almost cried and couldn’t put down my phone at all, well done on the angst, thank u authornim🥺
SaidaAddict
#6
Chapter 6: Damn it's so good. Why am I crying chdgfvhb
Krizaxtwice #7
Chapter 6: Bunos chapter plsss 🥺❤️
Jamess #8
Chapter 6: wow that was a roller coaster ride man....super 👍👍👍👍👍😄
SaiDa1020_
#9
Chapter 6: Wow you are always great makes me as a reader come in and feel the story line in each chapter, my heart is very weak and cry when reading the last chapter, thank you so much authornim you are so great in every story you make, your hands and mind are very brilliant and precious... Thank you somuch anda stay safe and healthy

.
ChoiDahye
#10
Chapter 6: *SCREAM* I'm like ANAMSKAOA!!! I felt like a roller coaster of emotions and I loved it<3!!!!