“Caramel latte, right?” Dr. Kim asked me at the counter. We were at his favorite coffee shop this time but sadly, there weren’t available seats anymore since it was almost 11PM so we opted for a takeout instead. Students were flocking the place, probably to study on a weekend.

“I’ll get iced matcha latte.” I decided to try a different flavor because I always had caramel latte. I also got a slice of blueberry cheesecake while he didn’t because he wasn’t that much of a sweet tooth. Now we just had to think of ways on how to eat all these inside his car without making a mess.

I was about to hand over my card to the cashier because I said I was paying but he was quick to stop me and give his instead. I looked at him in question with raised brows, waiting for an explanation when I made it clear earlier before we went inside that I was buying our food tonight.

“Pay next time.” He took his card back from the lady and didn’t even wait for me to look for a spot to wait. We just stood somewhere on the corner to avoid being a bother to other people as we waited. I’ll just buy him lunch at the hospital next time then because as much as possible, I didn’t want to break my promises.

I thought we were just going to eat inside his car parked outside the café but he told me he still wanted to buy something he had been craving for. We drove for a while and stopped by a pojangmacha we spotted along the road that sold street food of different kinds like hotteok, gimbap, tteokbokki, sundae, dakkochi, odeng, mandu, and anju. Everything was too salivating that I got excited from the mere sight of those delicacies.

“I’m paying this time, right?” I asked him as I surveyed everything they were selling.

He suddenly reached for my bag and took my wallet out. He placed it inside his pocket because it was just a small bearn compact wallet that was easy to find inside my small bag as well so it wasn’t much of a trouble for him to snatch and hide it.

“Yah! Give that back!” I glared at him and closed my eyes in frustration because I couldn’t get it myself as well. I badly wanted to reach for his pocket but I was scared I could do something I shouldn’t do. He ignored me and just proceeded on to order to the lady which made me more frustrated than I already was. He really had his own ways of getting what he wanted. I must’ve underestimated him because I didn’t really expect him to just invade my bag like that.

I folded my arms on my chest with a frown and just looked at the food display again. I was a er for odeng which made me smile again from the mere sight of it so I got about ten sticks and five sticks of dakkochi as well. I badly wanted to eat but I held in my patience. Dr. Kim, on the other hand, just got himself 3 servings of tteokbokki because according to him, ‘Tteokbokki is my wife.’

He kept his mouth shut again when I asked him where we were heading to so I just let him drive. I was too tired to argue.

It got me thinking again as to how I ended up in this kind of situation. I was super exhausted but I still said yes to his coffee invitation which was definitely so not me. I think his kindness was the reason why. He did some things for me without even asking for anything in return or taking it out against me. He did all those because well, he just wanted to.

I also appreciated the fact that he did not bring up the incident where he saw me crying at the cafeteria days ago. I still was embarrassed because of it, but when I saw how he was acting around me right now, I felt kind of relieved. He really had that warmth that will make you comfortable around him and I will not deny that.

We arrived at a mountain park soon after that showcased the mesmerizing night view of Seoul. This park was shaped like a camel hump and was the Joseon family dynasty’s enjoyment before. After finding a parking spot, I helped him carry our food and proceeded to the entrance.

We needed to hike all the way up for about 450 meters to really appreciate the night lights. I wasn’t that much of a hiker but my stamina could manage still. It was only about five minutes of hiking to find a nice spot to eat but Dr. Kim already seemed tired. I looked at him and gave him a teasing look. “What? You’re only 27 but you’re tired already?”

He stopped for a while before he answered me in between breaths. “I’m  already turning 28 this year.”

All along I thought he was only two years older because at the hospital, he was 2 years my senior. Turned out he was 3 years older.

“How old were you when you went to med school?” I asked. I was starting to get short on breaths as well but the progressive view all the way up somehow did us justice.

“I was 18, you?” I noticed that our pace was slowing down but he had larger strides than I had so he was the one who was keeping up with me.

“I was accelerated by a year so I went at 17.”

“I was supposed to be accelerated as well, but I had inconsistent grades on purpose. That way, my family won’t expect me to consider being a doctor, but my plan didn’t work. They forced me into this profession and had me guarded to make sure I didn’t do anything related to acting.” He laughed at the sudden thought of it that didn’t sound too naturally convincing. It was that same bittersweet laugh he had that night with a hint of sadness in his voice.

I was about to say something to close the topic because it might be too uncomfortable for him but he spoke further, much to my surprise. “My grandma’s the only person who’s on my side, even until now. She was the one who brought me to my acting classes in secret. It was hard but, as much as I recognize the privilege that I have as it makes me sensitive to other people’s struggles, it doesn’t mean I’m immune to life’s hardships as well. I think it’s okay to still crumble at times when things get tough.”

I never once thought he was this deep of a person. He knew his way into words; he knew how to craft sentences that made sense and will keep you reflecting as well. Most of all, I never once thought I’d hear something like that while hiking up a mountain at night. 

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