Chaeryeong was quite sure that the whole ‘finding myself’ journey was going a bit too fast. Just a week ago she was completely terrified about even thinking that she was gay or something even close to that. Now she found herself unconsciously checking out the new barista at her favourite coffee shop. For her defense she was really pretty, wait...that didn’t defend her at all. 

From the start of the day she slowly began to notice that her ‘gayness’ was alway there, quietly lurking in the shadows of her mind, waiting for the right moment to show itself, which just happened to be right now, with Yeji standing in front of her. 

“Yah! Chaeryeong-ah, are you even listening to me?” No, in fact she wasn't, for some reason her brain decided to focus only on the way her eyes sparkled in the sun like diamonds. 

“Uhm...sorry, what were you saying?” She needed to snap out of it, this was her best friend for Christ’s sake! “Felix and I decided to make it official!” Chaeryeong felt like the ground underneath her started to crumble. 

“W-what?” The smile on Yeji’s face began to slowly fade away. “Aren’t you happy for me? I mean, you’re my best friend, I thought you’d be more supportive.” 

“No!, I mean yes, I am happy for you! I just didn’t expect it.” Chaeryeong decided to just stop talking, she was sure that if she continued, the only thing she would do was kick the ladder under her own feet. 

“Okay, I guess.” 

Yeji didn’t look at her again that day and she knew she ed up.

------

“What’s with the long face Chaeryeong-ah?”

“I don’t have time for this Ryujin…” She was occupied with trying to figure out how she can apologize to Yeji. 

“What? Maybe I can help.” Chaeryeong was pretty desperate at this point, for some reason she couldn’t think of a single way to show Yeji she was sorry. 

“Okay...I need to apologize to Yeji and I don’t know how.” Ryujin scrunched up her eyebrows. “What did you do?...C’mon, I need to know so I can help you.” Chaeryeong sighed, she really didn’t want to reveal her, rather big, crush on Yeji. But when she looked at Ryujin she felt like she could share anything so she took a deep breath and for the first time said everything out loud. 

“Wow….I..” Chaeryeong was sweating bullets. The long silence that followed Ryujin’s exclamation made her extremely nervous. 

“I never expected the school’s top student to be a raging lesbian…”

“WHAT?” Chaeryeong was instantly on her feet, her face red as it can get. “I’m not..g..gay! It’s just a..a...FAZE, yes a faze!” 

Ryujin didn’t seem amused by the slightest. Her eyebrows were raised, eyes piercing her soul as if she knew her deepest secrets. Chaeryeong gave up, turning her eyes away from the older girl. 

“Look, I..I just need help with apologizing, I don’t need you to say...stuff like that.” She heard Ryujin sigh, and for a moment she felt bad but brushed it away quickly. 

“So will you help me or what?” Ryujin rolled her eyes at her, she DEFINITELY didn’t know why for the record. 

“Alright...just go to her and sincerely say your sorry, you have to show her that you really regret doing what you did, otherwise you will get nowhere. You need to be true to her, and most importantly to yourself.” 

And with that she left, leaving Chaeryeong with a heavy feeling that she couldn’t shake off for the rest of the day.