Isn’t there a holiday today?    

    Thanksgiving or whatever

    Hello?

    Are you okay?

[18]

When I was twelve, Dad and I joked that if I could manifest into a man, I’d do that in an instance. Because for the longest time, my periods have been—what’s the best way to describe it?—right, it was complete, utter, ing hell.

    Approximately three days before, I’d have mood swings that ranged between the spectrum of raging hissy fits to titanic sinking sorrow. Hailee told me that I sobbed big fat tears when we watched Finding Nemo. I told her to shove it because Nemo lost his child and he deserves my tears.

    Apparently, Dad said that he watched me shovel down an entire tub of ice cream only to cry again after because quote, I would become a fat cow and no one would ever love me, end quote. Let’s just put it this way. I was a dumb teenager.

    This past week I’d willingly ignored Sehun’s text messages because I’d been too much of a sad boy to do anything. I stayed in the art studio, and I think he was initially confused why I was MIA for a long time.

    My periods were irregular, and I was finally getting one in three months. My hormones were crashing and burning in me, living their best life while I was not. I was diagnosed with PMDD when I was in middle school, and the only difference was that my periods more than the norm.

    Everything, I repeat, everything, was turned to a ten. I was a sensitive ball of emotions, and during those seven days of hell, I’d succumbed to being alone. It was better for everyone, but mostly, for me. If I saw a person breathing near me, I’d find something to be upset about. And let me emphasize this for you: involuntarily.

    So, yes, at times, I did wish I were a man.

    I locked myself in my room and today, particularly, had been the worst day. I was in pain. Not only emotional but physically too. It was like my body couldn’t pick which one to screw me over with and just expected me to handle the entire damnation of PMS. In fact, I’d wanted to double over in pain every time I wasn’t curled up like a fetus.

    I can hear a faint knock at my door, but I couldn’t bother to get out of bed. My body really said, honey, double vision wants to join in on the fun.

    I told the person to go away and come back when I was alive again. They didn’t listen and this time, pounded on the door. I grit my teeth, anger bubbling up in me.

    I push myself out of bed, feeling particularly y with my matted hair and crusty lips. Limbing toward the door, I have the full intention of opening it like a normal person would have.

    This person was thinking in 2032 because they’d broken down the door. I stare at the space where my door had previously been and back to the person who’d done it.

    Fred is poker face as usual, but his body is in full grimace mode. Sehun peeks out behind the latter almost comedically. I would laugh, but my body will die on me; yet, ironically, this is the least of my problems. My RA will kill me and so will my dean, and I just know that I’m so ed.

    “What the ?”

    I must sound scary because the two back away from me. I’m surprised Fred has the decency to look regretful.

    “Who broke my damn door?”

    Sehun’s smile wavers back and forth between fear and uncertainty. He point to Fred, and Fred pretends to not see anything.

    I groan, clutching my throbbing forehead. “Alright, here’s what going to happen in the following minutes or I will annihilate you both. And by that, I mean that I’m going to call up my mafia friends and murder both of you and make sure your bodies are dumped in international waters. And guess what, boys? No evidence to incriminate. No bodies to trace back to me. Killing two birds with one stone. Now, do you two understand me?”

    They both nod nimbly. I was having an extremely hard time keeping a straight face at Fred’s complete obedience. He makes it back from Home Depot in fifteen and gets my door back up.

    Sehun goes with him because he knows his body will disappear if he stays with me.

    I kick the two of them back to the vicinity of their own company and go back to my miserable sleep.

    The door opens later, and I startle awake, gawking at the intruder.

    “Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Sehun sings casually as if he hasn’t just broken into my room.

    I stare at him with utmost suspicion when he dangles my lanyard in his hand.

    “Figured you didn’t have a use for this so I borrowed it,” he explains, ignoring the menace in my eyes.

    My eyes fall to his hands. He’s carry something. I squint when he flicks on the light, proceeding to complain that I’m not a vampire and I should make some use of modern technology.

    I flop back down and proceed to ignore his senseless babbling.

    Sehun plops on my bedside. “Luv?”

    I make some type of noise to indicate that I’m somewhat doing okay.

    “I—uh—I brought you…I don’t even know what to call this. A care package?”

    I briefly turn on my side, facing him. He realizes I’m squinting at the reusable bag in his hand, so he turns it over. “Sorry, I took so bloody long to realize what was going on. I looked for Sooyoung, and she told me it was better to leave you alone. I bet she thinks I’m a wanker now because I badgered her for over an hour. She told me I should get you a list of…things.”

    Sehun looks so awkward that I can’t help but chuckle through the pain. He hands me some extra strength Tylenol and a gatorade. I am eternally grateful for his presence and no longer wish for him to get lost.

    “You brought me chocolate?” I ask, digging through the bag. There’s six or seven bars of expensive chocolate. Milk, dark, 72%. He’s got it down. “I’m proud of you, S.”

    He beams cutely. “Better than a bloody thank you. I’ll take that any day.”

    “I don’t like dark chocolate. I’m giving it to Fred,” I murmur.

    Sehun shrugs. “It’s all yours, luv. Up to you to do whatever you want with it.”

    I continue sorting through the things. “How awkward was it on a scale of one to ten when you were checking out these tampons?” I hold them up for him.

    He snickers, “zero. Made Fred check them all out for me. The cashier was eyeing him in admiration, so he won this one.”

    I awe, “was she cute?”

    “He was blooming marvelous, but you’re pretty cute if I say so myself.” He winks at me as if he hasn’t offended my stomach contents.

    I swat at his chest jokingly. He complains that I’m an ungrateful , but I ignore that and almost scream when I see a mini carton of goldfish. “I ing love goldfish!”

    Sehun’s eyebrows knit. “Yeah…you must really lo—“

    He doesn’t get the chance to finish because I throw my arms around his neck, forgetting he’s barely stable on my eenie meenie excuse of a bed. We fall to the floor, but it’s carpet so I reckon he’s perfectly okay.

    “God. You’re such a—“

    “Angel?”

    “I was gonna say cow, but sure, bruv.”

    He got a smack for that. I let him go and go back to exploring the rest of my care package. The boy even got me a diffuser. I’m going have to text Sooyoung later and tell her I’m giving the best friend of the year award to him. I don’t even care if she calls me stingy. He ing wins.

    As a reward, I let him stay the night. We watch a list of movies he’s curated. I respect the choice to put Mulan on the list. The best part of the night is him complaining that it’d been a shame Mulan was two dimensional.

    I told him she’d never go for him because he was a colonizer. He said I was just jealous because my only talent was getting a useless degree.

    For that, I subjected him to two hours of me bawling to A Dog’s Purpose. Did I mention on his shirt? Somehow, he weaseled his way into letting me snuggle his chest. Or was that me? For personal reasons, I will not be revealing anything of sort.

    Anyway, we fell asleep with Mean Girls playing in the background. I wasn’t even mad that I fell asleep during the best part. Because for me, it was the comforting sleep talking Sehun let out every now and then. It was also the way his hands returned to the sweet spot right between my and upper thighs.

    It makes me want to recommend everyone their own personal human body pillow. Too bad I got the best one.

[19]

“You’re going to have to let me go, luv,” Sehun urges, patting my back. I groan into his neck, shaking my head.

    “Make an excuse for me. I can’t do this,” I tell him.

    Our moment is ruined when a man barrels his way past us. He hits my ankle with his luggage, and I fall back. On my .

    Sehun betrays me by laughing before he pulls me up. I ignore Fred’s eyes that look suspiciously like he’s internally laughing at me.

    “I’d love to play with you, but I’ve got a flight back home in two hours,” he says as a matter of fact.

    I sigh, “if you leave, I have no excuse to not not go.”

    Sehun snickers, “you’re such a baby. Come on, luv. You’ll get to see your sister.” I make a face. “Your mother—no, you hate her. Hey, your dad will be there. It can’t be that bad.”

    I stand back dejectedly. “You’re so lucky. You get to go back to another ing country.”

    He chuckles, ruffling my hair. “It’s going to be a blooming mess. I bet a million bucks someone is going to try to get me to drop out of Harvard.” He sees the immediate fall in my expression. “Luv, I’d never drop out.”

    Blinking at him, I ask, “really?”

    Sehun nods, cupping both hands gently on my face. “You’ll see me the minute you get back. I’ll be right here in this train station.”

    Two weeks without my best friend. I don’t even know what’s that like anymore. Whether it’d been purposefully or not, Sehun and I continue to stare at each other. I tilt my head, focusing on the light in his eyes. The tiny shimmer of a happy Sehun. The real one.

    His eyes drop to my lips, and he begins to lean in. The gravitational pull is almost impossible to not follow through.

    Right at the perfect moment, Fred clears his throat, and the two of us break apart. I stiffly grab at my luggage, avoiding Sehun’s eyes. “I-I’m gonna go now.”

    His voice is faint. “Bye, luv.”

[20]

    Happy holidays

    How are you doing

    It’s only been a day, but Mum’s already dragged me to a million different art museums. She’d love you.

    I’m doing good

    But you know that’s a lie

    My mother has decided to ignore my existence indefinitely.

    To be fair, it was Dad’s fault. We were trashing her turkey, and Hailee snitched on us.

    Knowing you

    Is the poor girl still alive?

    Listen up here mister

    Hailee is out here living her best life with her two boyfriends or some bull like that.

    I haven’t gotten in ages

    Shame.

    I saw many Richards

     off

    My day hasn’t been that bad. Dad took me around town for old times sake. Boston is still Boston.

    Really? I’d reckon it was exactly like Cambridge

    I hate your sarcasm. It’s there, but it’s hard to tell.

    That’s how us Brits show our wits. We’re too smart for you yankees

[21]

    Will you stop leaving me on read

    That depends on your behavior

    Merry Christmas, luv. Wish you were here.

    Oh I wish I were there too. I want to die.

    You’re being melodramatic.

    Hails and Dad got into an argument as we were opening presents this morning. She’s not very slick, and I knew she’d wanted my bottle of liquor instead. Little sis complained that she wasn’t a baby. Dad immediately knew where this was going and accused her of drinking. And then my mother goes full mother bear because it's Hailee. Everyone is screaming at each other, and then there’s me with one present because Hailee and my mother forgot about me as usual.

    Wow

    That’s tragic

    It’s okay. I survived eighteen years. What’s another ten days?

    Blimey. I’d send you another care package, but I’m stuck with princely duties until I’m back at Cambridge

    What does that entail?

    A lot of fake cheerfulness toward the media and preparation for a speech to catch my people up on my future plans

    Ew. Imagine being a prince. Couldn’t be me.

    Imagine being a commoner. Couldn’t be me.

    How’s Fred?

    He’s on his own holiday break. I’m being watched by five guys now, and I’d take a single Fred over this any day. I miss him, but he hasn’t seen his husband in ages.

    Wow. Who would’ve thought? He’s on that side of the rainbow

    Okay ttyl my mother is screaming at me because I’m texting you when we should be doing family things. She’s also unironically accusing me of being selfish.

    Do call me the next time. My fingers aren’t used to this much exercise.

[22]

    “Honey, are you really going to stay home today?” Dad asks.

    I pull my covers away to look at him. “I think so.”

    “Your high school art teacher is teaching a class downtown,” he says.

    I gasp, sitting up. “What time?”

    “You have approximately…twenty minutes.”

[23]

When acquaintances ask me how it happened after what was seemingly a platonic relationship (are we going to ignore all the —yes, yes; we are), my mind often goes blank. How do I tell them that I woke up one day and realized I’d been in love with him the entire time?

    It sounds simple, but it really wasn’t. If I had to give you one reason—one catalyst that pushed me into the pit of self-doubt, it was definitely this.

    “Luv, is it okay if we talk tomorrow? I’ve had a really long day—hold on. Are you…crying? Tell me what’s wrong.”

    “I’m ed,” I sob into my phone. “I’m—“ My voice cracks majestically. I’m sure his attraction (if he had any) toward me increased by tenfold. “I’m going to be homeless, S. I don’t know—“ My voice breaks, and Sehun quickly tells me to count to ten and breathe. Then, he promptly urges me to add context.

    I tell him how I began my day, dropping by the pop-up class my previous art teacher was holding downtown Boston.

    Sehun knows how much I worship the dude. Mr. Erso was practically the person who nurtured my art. He helped me shape and sharpen my current skillsets.

    During his painting class, he and I caught up on our lives. I told him about pursuing an art degree at Harvard, and he was, not surprisingly, proud of me. He clapped me on the back and congratulated me.

    We laughed about the number of times I’d drop by his class to straight out bawl and unload everything that’d been weighing me down. He told me that he was glad I’ve become a great woman.

    Since the day had gone so well, I didn’t expect anything out of the ordinary to happen, but it just so happened that Mr. Erso ran into my mother at the local grocery store.

    Apparently, my major had slipped in their conversation, and my mother, being her usual keep-public-image-first-freak-out-later self, immediately dismissed herself and drove back home.

    I was unaware of her wrath until she practically screamed at me for flushing down thousands of dollars down the drain. At this point, confusion was an understatement. For all I’d known, she was lashing out at me for no reason. It wasn’t like she was explaining why she was so livid.

    Dad overheard the conversation and tried his best to calm her down, but to no avail, she flat out ignored him and proceeded to go upstairs.

    I followed her, and she barged straight into my room and began pulling my drawers open and tossing my clothes back into my luggage.

    I vividly remember screaming at her to stop and asking her what the hell was up. In the end, I’d watched my dad hold her in his arms to stop her as she sobbed into his chest.

    And the worst thing hadn’t even been that. It was the fact that I’d only come to the realization of what just went down when Hailee stopped by my room, smelling like she’d been rolling around in freshly lit weed, and had the audacity to go off on me.

    I know she loves our mother, but I’d ought to put her back in her place one of these days. I take her verbal abuse and the amount of times she’d called me pathetic for not having any brain cells.

    After Hailee left, my last nerve snapped and I stormed outside and went on an hour drive alone, trying to grasp every thing that had happened in the last hour.

    As you can tell, I haven’t really processed any of it, and Sehun is falling victim to my indecipherable crying-talk.

    “Are you okay, luv?”

    I snap indignantly, “no,” but immediately regret my tone, so I soften up. “Sorry. I’m—I’m really sorry. It’s just everything’s gone to in one single day, and I have another five ing days here. She’s adamant on kicking me out, and my dean just called me, telling me that she pulled my tuition for next year. I don’t know any other options.”

    Sehun is quiet for a beat before asking, “how about your dad?”

    I cry again for another two minutes before answering, “my parents share a joint account. She’d probably try to freeze the funds or something. I’m so utterly ed. And the worst part is that I can’t leave.”

    He sighs. “I’m so sorry, luv. If I could rescue you from there, I would. But right now, here’s what you need to do: you’re going to hang in there for another five days. Will you do that for me?”

    I agree reluctantly. “Then what?”

    “We’re going to figure it out. Together. The two of us. Back at Cambridge.”

    My heart fills with red, hot, warmth and no words can describe how he just made me feel with such simple words.

    “S?”

    “Yes, luv?”

    “Thank you.”

    “Of course. I’d do anything for you.”

    “I really love you, S. I can’t lose you after this. It would tear me apart.”

    His chuckle tickles my ears, and my stomach isn’t spared either. “In this world we live in, I’d be the one losing you. Never the other way around.”

    We spend the entire night on the phone, and before I fall asleep, I hear the quiet reciprocation of his I love you to me. At the time, I’d been too sleepy to think any more of it, but even now, I had a gnawing feeling that it wasn’t the type of love between two friends.

    It’d been evident by the butterflies in my stomach, and more than anything, there was nothing platonic about it.

[24]

I always thought Sooyoung was dramatic when she told other people that Sehun and I were gooey-eyed for each other long before we even knew to pretend we didn’t have feelings for each other.

    I mean—I didn’t want her to be right. I thought I would know myself best. I guess I didn’t.

    The five days were painstakingly long, but I survived them. Sehun and I brainstormed what I could do, and we came up with a plan. I didn’t want him to use any money on me, so I outright rejected when he offered to pay my tuition.

    Instead, I told him I would get a job, despite him insisting but he gave up because I told him I’d drop him like a hot potato if he tried to push the toxic masculinity stuff on me.

    I knew he’d never be like that, but it was the quickest way to get him to drop it.

    I’d been exhausted after a night of basically no sleep. I couldn’t get any shut-eye on the ride back to Cambridge. Naturally, I’d assumed that upon seeing me, someone would run away. My point is that I’d looked like garbage, fresh out of the landfill, but when Sehun laid his eyes on me from across the station, something clicked in my chest.

    My heart went haywire, and I lost all intuition, dropping my luggage, and running right into his arms. He practically threw me up in the air, and all I could remember was how tightly he held onto me. 

    “Is it awkward to say that I came along too?” Sooyoung’s voice sounds from behind Sehun.

    Sehun and I pull away, and I scratch my nape. “Hi—you’re here.”

    She nods. “Yeah, I missed you, but not as much as you two apparently.”

    Sehun clears his throat. “I’m going to grab your bag before it gets…stolen.”

    Sooyoung exchanges a blank look between the two of us before settling onto me. “I think you know.”

    I feign, “know what?”

    She tsks. “It’s like watching that one annoying couple who are meant for each other, but they’re both too stupid.”

    I chuckle, punching her lightly. “How does it end?”

    “They’re married to other people and live out their entire unfulfilled lives with sadness.”

[25]

“You know when I said, ‘get a job,’ I definitely had better ideas,” Sehun tells me blandly.

    I stare at him for a half second before turning to smile at another customer and accept his gracious tip. “Really? What ideas did you have, exactly?”

    “Well—“

    “Anything above minimum wage, S.”

    He closes his mouth, and I tap his nose, completely unbothered by his glare. It’s as intimidating as you would expect. Not at all.

    “It was either this or or being a sugar baby or a stripper. This was the best option,” I say.

    Sehun squints his eyes. “I could hardly say that this is any better. You’re selling your body to those creepy men.”

    I fix a look at him. “Oh? Can you confidently say that you haven’t been sneaking glances at my in the past hour?”

    “Shut up,” he sulks.

    “Are you mad, little boy?” I ask.

    “Do I look like a child?”

    I raise an eyebrow. “Yes.”

    He rolls his eyes at this. “I can’t win against you nor do I want to attempt to.”

    I beam at him, and he leans closer. I shiver, feeling his warm breath on me.

    “Break it up, lovebirds. You’re chasing my customers away with your damn soap opera,” Chanyeol deadpans.

    I turn around, feigning innocence toward my boss. “You heard him. Finish your drink and get out of here.”

    Sehun doesn’t even bother to hide his annoyance. “Oh please, feel free to fire her.”

    Chanyeol taps his nose, smiling mockingly. “No can do, your majesty. She makes me the most money.”

    I laugh in my palm and shake my head endearingly, moving away to help out another customer. When I come back, he’s done with his drink. “I’m drunk—take me home.”

    “Complete bollocks. There’s no alcohol in cola. Now, go home and sleep it off.”

    He groans, “I like you better when you’re not mean.”

    “No, you love me. Bye, S. Make sure you leave a good tip.”

    “Hell’s bloody hells, luv. You turn me down for money, and now you want it?”

    “This way. I don’t owe you anything.”

    Sehun pauses in his movements. He tilts his head, eyes gauging into me. “Why does it matter?”

    I shift. “Because it doesn’t feel right.”

    “Does it make you feel less of a woman?”

    “No, but—“

    “Then, does it make you feel disrespected?”

    “No, S—“

    “Does it make you unhappy in any way?”

    “Of course not,” I reply, scrunching my face.

    He smiles warmly. “Then, don’t look so sad all the time. I just want you to be happy, which is why I’d even go as far as to offer you money. I know I’m being a jealous bloke, but rest easy, luv. I’d never force you to do anything against your will. You trust me, don’t you?”

    My uneasiness crumbles, and I reciprocate his smile. “With my life, S. Now, hurry home.”

    “What’s the rush?” He complains.

    I lift a brow. “I expect you to be here at the end of my shift, or did you have other plans?”

    His eyes immediately brighten. “Nope, I’m leaving. I’ll see you at four.”

    Whether it’d been a fluke or just a spur of the moment, Sehun leans in, pressing a soft kiss to my cheeks. My mouth falls open, and I stare at him when he pulls away.

    He’s completely dense to my surprise and excitedly waves me goodbye.

    Meanwhile, Chanyeol, who’s seemingly watched the entire scene, scoffs beside me. “Your boyfriend’s whipped.”

    I close my mouth, chuckling to myself. I didn’t have the heart to correct him, and maybe I liked those two words together. Sehun and my boyfriend.

[26]

“You’re hovering,” I grumble, taking a slow sip of my beer.

    Sehun presses his sides into mine, completely ignoring what is personal space. Sooyoung stares between the two of us enviously.

    “So, I have a question…” Someone asks. I think her name had been Kiko. She leans forward across the table, smiling coyly. “Are you dating her?”

    I outright say, “no,” but for some reason, my heart pangs at Kiko’s excitement. Sehun smiles at her with his all-worldly-Prince-Charming smile.

    Suddenly, I have to use the restroom, so I excuse myself. Sooyoung follows with an all-knowing look on her face. Did I mention very annoying too?

    I lock myself inside the stall, and she stands just outside, tapping lightly on the door. “You, my friend, are going through denial,” she chirps. I ignore her, so she repeats, “mad denial.”

    I groan, “bugger off.”

    “You sound like him now,” she teases.

    “Because he’s a stupid leech. He’s like everywhere. On the outside, he may be a prince, but he’s almost so slobbish and immature that I want to drop kick him across the head. I mean—he literally invited himself tonight. Said some stupid crap about how he didn’t want to be alone.”

    She snorts. “It’s the lot of you—I swear.” Sighing, she says, “well, why don’t you drop-kick him all the way to the moon?”

    I make a gargled noise. “Because I’d be assassinated by Fred.”

    “Who?”

    “His royal guard,” I drone.

    “Oh. The ginger. Anyway—not the point. Think deeper than surface level. Obviously, you’d be killed for harming a hair on his head, but honey, why? Why do you let him linger despite it being supposedly annoying? Why are you so obviously jealous of Kiko—“

    “I am not jealous,” I quip.

    Sooyoung only sends me an unconvinced hum and continues, “so if I were to have with him tonight, you’d be perfectly okay.”

    I snort at this. “You’re not his type.”

    I can feel her glare through the door. “None taken. Just a jealous girlfriend, ladies and gentlemen,” she announces as if she’s a talk-show hostess.

    “I told you that it’s not like that!”

    “I love you, honey, but sometimes, you deny the obvious.”

    “When?”

    “First year when I told you that James Dean guy was interested.”

    “James Dean is dead,” I drawl.

    “I—just shut up. This is irrelevant. What’s relevant is that you cried over James Dean. Said that you were too late because he got a girlfriend. So, what did we learn today, my pupil?”

    “First of all, he tried to feel me up, and I told him that I wasn’t the noncommittal girl. Then, he ghosted me.”

    She lets out a frustrated groan, slamming her hand on my stall. “You’re doing it again. You’re deflecting by bringing up unimportant .”

    “Let me live,” I protest.

    “Well, then, tell me. Can you live watching your best friend marry someone else—have her ing kids? Can you smile through that and wish him the best?”

    I answer, “duh,” but I’m lying. I know I’m lying because it’s that burning feeling of wanting to be victorious that claws through my insides. I just don’t want her to be right.

    She finally gives up with a long sigh. “Get out of the stall. Let’s head back before they question if I’ve killed you.”

    I roll my eyes. “You wouldn’t.”

    “Yeah, well, by the way our conversation went, I wouldn’t be too sure.”

    “Why do you care, Soo? Why does it matter how my love life goes?”

    Sooyoung turns to look into my eyes with b conviction. “Because it hurts to see you not being properly prioritized by the people you love. Your parents and your sister always overlook you. But things have changed, you’ve looked so much happier in the past months. Why? Well, I think you know the answer to that.”

    She waves lazily and tells me to hurry back. After Sooyoung leaves, I ponder on all of this.

    I’m shaken out of my thoughts when there’s a knock on the door. I pull it open, curious as to why someone’s knocking on a public restroom.

    It’s Sehun, standing there with a concerned look on his face. The familiar draw of his eyebrows and the way his brown eyes seemed to get lost into mine—the way they never dither away even for a second.

    I come to the realization that I’m stupid, and there wasn’t a benefit to being right. My breath falls slow, and I stare at him, tilting my head.

    His pupils dilate, and I open my mouth to speak, “say, if I told you to do something strange, would you?”

    He swallows. “What is it, luv?”

    I chew on my bottom lip. “Just promise me Fred won’t break my bones.”

    “Why would he—“

    I pull on his collar, and our lips collide almost too violently to be a first kiss. Sehun tugs me in like he’s been waiting for this all along. I confirm that, maybe, just maybe, I’m too stubborn for my own good.

    Our kiss is interrupted by someone—Kiko, unironically.

    She blinks at the two of us bug-eyed. “W—wha—you two—huh?”

    Sehun grins, “sorry, we didn’t mean to lie to you. It’s kind of a…secret?”

    My heart is between leaping right out of my throat or bursting inside of my chest cavity. Both sounds like they would kill me. Not that I’m not dying inside right now.

    Kiki nods slowly, zipping her lips. “I’d never tell anyone.” Then, she slips inside the restroom.

    Sehun and I exchange a puzzled look, and when our eyes fall behind her, we see Fred standing with his arms crossed.

    “Oh, blimey, Fred, always with the spectacular timing,” Sehun says, clapping.

    Fred nods in disinterest and approaches the two of us. He puts a hand in his pocket, shuffling and pulling something out.

    He hands them to Sehun, and then turns to leave.

    Sehun wraps an arm around my lower back, tugging me back into his space. “How about we put these to good use?”

    “Aren’t you supposed to be good Christian boy?”

    “Anglican, but isn’t so condemned in Europe. Ironic, innit? Your ancestors fled Britain to escape religious persecution.”

    “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that bit just ,” I tell him as a matter of fact.

    He laughs, diving to kiss my neck. “I really need this shirt off of you,” he whispers.

    My cheeks are warm. Maybe a bit from the alcohol and my skin thrumming from his touch. “Well, what’s stopping you?”

    Nothing. Nothing had been stopping him, and he bent me over in the uni stall. Let’s say, nothing about our love life was normal. But I didn’t care, I wasn’t much of a vanilla girl myself.

[a/n] college really be taking my last brain cells. if this seems very poorly edited, it was unedited. i wrote this over the course of two weeks, i think. guys im really growing up too fast and i cant. also do you like my new user? i was inspired by utterly wild tik tok users. literally saw a user under namjoonsleft.

i--someone send them some holy water please

ok i might actually update dm. i miss eunbaek<3