He sighs dreamily, watching clouds float by. He can’t believe he and Hyukjae actually made it through three years. It puts a sweet smile on his face, remembering the last time they saw each other two days ago before they got swept up by organization duties.

Maybe the energy draining date can wait for next week? The long-haired guy mused, knowing the other got back from a donation drive last night. He switched the mental list of agenda he has full of physical involvement and thinks up of a chill type of date.

Staring dazed at the moist dripping down the side of a cold drink he ordered for Hyukjae, Donghae blinked rapidly as he hears feet pounding harshly against the pavement, and so he looks up to see his boyfriend running up to him. Donghae stood up, confused.

“Donghae…” Hyukjae pants out, eyes downcast, the younger blinks at him, why is Hyukjae in such a hurry? He’s not late…

The other straightens up. “I’m sorry, I know we’re supposed to be celebrating our third year today… But I want to tell this to you as soon as possible.” He gets his breathing even, taking another deep breath before he takes Donghae’s hands in his, he’s shaking.

“Jae, what’s wrong?”

“I…” He looks down to the side, blinking and gulping. “I think, they’re starting to suspect something… suspecting me.” Hyukjae finally gets out, and Donghae feels the palms around his own turn even colder. “I noticed little things before, even before we met,” another shaky breath, Donghae gently and silently guides him to their spot at the cylindrical cements. He lets Hyukjae continue, rubbing his wrists using his thumb. “They’d, they’d get silent whenever we hear something in the news about gay people, or whenever they see someone like that, and then… they brought up that someone they know has a son that prefers the same , I saw their eyes that time, it was” Hyukjae was breathing heavily again. “It scared me! They had this dark look on their faces, like they were so disgusted even if it wasn’t any of their business!”

Donghae frowns.

“And, and then, earlier, when I said I was going to go meet you. They said…” The other pauses, now leaning his forehead on Donghae’s shoulder. “I better not be one of those things or they don’t know what they might end up doing to me… Donghae, I’m afraid.”

As Hyukjae leans heavily more onto him, Donghae wraps an arm around his waist and the other resting on his upper back. They stayed like that for a while, not saying anything.

“Hey Hyuk, do you think we should run away?” Donghae spoke suddenly during their dinner a few hours after. Hyukjae looked up so quickly that he surprised them both, they were in a small place a bit to the outside of town, it was a comfortable place, one where they go out to eat whenever they can, even getting to the point where the nice lady handling the food had come to recognize them, smiling at them whenever they enter the place.

“What are you saying, so suddenly?” He gapes at the other guy across from him. Donghae kept his eyes on him, not laughing or smiling.

“I mean, just when things get ugly, which I hope doesn’t happen. We could get away from here.” He says, speaking again when he sees Hyukjae about to protest. “You remember about how I told you that I’ve been saving up money since high school graduation and taking part time jobs? I think I can afford that place I’ve mentioned to you before we started college, the one I mentioned that was a bit away from here. To keep the rent, we might need to work part time jobs but it’s still easy to get to our college from there. Should I get one? I really don’t like the feeling I’m getting after the things you told me earlier.”

Hyukjae bites his bottom lip. He’s making Donghae do something unecessary. “That’s supposed to be money for you. .” He says instead, frowning at the man across him.

“That’s what I want to spend my money on, Hyukjae. A place we can call ours.” Donghae says with a smile so soft that Hyukjae nearly forgot where they were. “But, if you’re worried that they might come for us at the college, do you think we should transfer? Although it might take a while.”

He shakes his head. “I think it will be fine, unless they kill me, or something.”

Donghae pinches his arm, hard. “Don’t say things like that!”

“Just trying to lighten up,” (“that’s not lightening anything!”) “let’s not think about them for now, sorry for making you worry.”

            They bid goodbye to the nice lady, starting their walk back to a nearby bus stop. Hyukjae and Donghae had their hands laced together, seeing as it’s late and few people pass them. Hyukjae felt the fingers around his squeeze him tightly. He looked to the side, Donghae was already looking at him.

            “You know, I’m thinking of telling my family my preference.” He suddenly says. “I know they won’t react positively, but I think it’s better for me to say it and come clean than hiding myself.”

            Hyukjae blinks.

            Donghae chuckles, pulling him closer by the hand and placing a sweet kiss on his lips. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to; you know that right? I’ll just tell them that they shouldn’t be expecting to get any grandkids from me, I won’t be dragging you into this. Okay, Hyukjae?” He gives Hyukjae another kiss before pulling away and resuming on walking, hand still in Hyukjae’s grasp.

            The older of the two stares at the back of Donghae’s head as he walks a few steps ahead of him, then down to their link hands. Hyukjae smiles.

            When Hyukjae received a message from his family a few weeks after his date with Donghae, he felt a cold sweat run down his back. “Get home immediately after your classes today, I have something to talk to you about.”

            He informs Donghae, who looked like he also thought the same thing as Hyukjae. Nodding in understanding, he ran a comforting hand through Hyukjae’s long hair and gives his forehead a kiss. “In case anything bad happens, give me a missed call, okay?” Hyukjae nods, they separate after. A heavy feeling in the pit of their stomachs.

            “I’m home.” Hyukjae calls out from their entryway. He sees his older sister looking worriedly at him first before he hears his father’s voice.

“Come here to the living room, Hyukjae.” His mother calls, wow, so even his mom is here, it must be something bad then. Hyukjae gulps and his lips before coming over. He sits to the solo sofa beside his sister and respectfully greets his parents.

            “What is this thing that I’ve been hearing, Hyukjae?” His mother starts, holding her drink in one hand and eyes on her son. “Someone told us you’re behaving weird at college.”

            His father doesn’t move or speak, only staring at him from his seat. He was still, sitting with his back straight with a dignified air around him. It intimidates Hyukjae so much that it’s almost physically visible how affected he is by this man in front of him.

            “What do you mean by ‘weird’, mother?” Hyukjae asks instead, rubbing his hand with his palm on his lap. He and his sister got startled when his father suddenly moves and speaks, voice very authoritative.

            “Why are you prancing around college with a man in your arms?” He didn’t yell, yet he cut through the air with his voice and made everyone in the room jolt, nor did he move much, but his gestures were already threatening the remaining three people in the room. “I got a message from a business partner that her daughter saw you getting all chummy with some man. What is that about? Lee Hyukjae are you seeing a man?!” The man of the house snaps, his gaze flicking from the coffee table in front of him to his son.

            Hyukjae gulps.