"So what now, do I have to pick up a calculator from now on?" Irene asked taking all the plates to the sink. They were both cleaning the living room after Joy and Seulgi had left. The new realization that she found out Wendy had named the company after their names.

 

Wendy laughed and went to hug the girl from behind as she scrubs the plates, "Of course not. Didn't I tell you no wife of mine will ever lift a finger?" she hummed leaning down to kiss her lover on her neck. "It's just to show for who and why the company exist in the first place. That it was built from love and for love" she said. 

 

After drying her hands, Irene turned facing her girlfriend looping her arms around her neck, "You are ridiculously cringey" she giggled
Wendy smiled, "Love does that to you" she leaned down pecking her on the lips. Both of them smiling in their kiss.

 

"I still can't believe you managed to actually be a CEO" she said smiling looking at her with affection.
Wendy hummed, "Does that earn me extra points to do this?" she asked, her hand sneakily slipping under Irene's t-shirt, running her palm on her stomach.

 

Irene bit her lips trying to suppress her moans as Wendy's hand crept higher and higher, "You've already earned them the first time you confessed to me" she moaned after Wendy ran her fingers on her harden bud.

 

That got Wendy to stop and look at her girlfriend, face flushed, "Wait-- You've liked me since then?"
"I've had my mind on you since you started buying those ridiculous bread, Seungwan," Irene said, her gaze and her words both unwavering. "At first I thought your preference in bread was just weird but then I realised it was all for me, how couldn't I get happy with that." A little of her shyness returned, and her cheeks flushed, although she didn't avert her eyes.

 

"How did I ever deserve you," Wendy said, stumbling over her words when she realized Irene  was waiting for a reaction . They burst out too quickly, but she didn't care. She held the girl's bare waist, holding it tight, . "How am I so lucky to be with you?"

 

"I think it's me that's lucky ," Irene said, without a trace of doubt. "You've spent years chasing after me. You try you hardest everyday to work hard to take care of me, but now, I want to take care of you. Please, let me show you. I need to show you."

 

 

Wendy could only nod. It was all she had ever wanted. 

 

 

The first meeting of their mouths was hot and deep. They fell into the kiss like old lovers who had danced this dance a thousand times before. Wendy took Irene's hips in her hands—not too roughly, but with purpose—and she gasped as Irene's hands curled around the back of her neck, drawing her even closer. The simple gesture of acceptance cut to her very foundation, and her grip trembled, suddenly shaken. She started to pull back, to ask 'Are you sure?', as they were still standing in the kitchen and not the comfort of their soft mattress, but there wasn't any hesitation in the way Irene's lips moved against hers. They were urgent and hungry, but also tender.

 

When they did pull apart for air, Wendy nearly drowned in the shining brown pigment of Irene's eyes. The strength of the love there stole her breath. Irene, however, hadn't been struck silent. "Please, Seungwan," she whispered, lips trembling around the words. "Make love to me."

 

 

It was a request Wendy couldn't deny. The urge to connect with the woman she loved was greater than anything else. If they only had these last few minutes together, she was determined to make them count. She caught Irene's mouth in another kiss, one that started out soft and gentle, but blossomed into something more passionate. The taste of Irene's tongue as it slid against hers sent a heavy throb straight between her legs, and she released a groan at the steadily building pressure that followed.

 

"Where?" she mumbled into the string of kisses, unable to give up Irene's lips for more than a few moments. "Tell me what to do."

Irene stepped back. "Just take me here."

It wasn't too hard to peel off Irene's shirt, it was an oversized one, and Irene helped her by shrugging out of the sleeves. As soon as Irene's shirt came into view, she worked the rest of her hand underneath, splaying her palm across the sleek muscles there and enjoying the way they shuddered.

 

"You too, Seungwan." One of Irene's hands wound around the back of her neck, teasing the soft strands of hair there. "Lose the clothes. I want to feel every bit of your skin."

 

Although she would have preferred to help Irene finish stripping, Wendy summoned what remained of her willpower. Not much could tear her away from Irene's beautiful s, but the prospect of pressing the full length of her body against her lover was motivation enough. She untied her pants rope and stripped her shirt up and over her head, letting both fall to the floor.

Both of them enjoying the warm body against each other, Wendy was already on her way to make Irene full when the doorbell rang.

They both stood silent, Wendy's fingers inches away from the molten heat. Both of them looked to the door hoping whoever just did that can get the off.

 

"Wen Wen!" Seulgi yelled through the door with a hard knock, "Let me in! I left my house keys on the table!"

 

To that Irene was already letting out a huge sigh and Wendy groaned, already making a plan how to stop her girlfriend from killing her friends.
"Don't Joy has a spare?!" she yelled remembering that those two bought an apartment togather, saying how they wanted to save rent.
"Left it at home! Key duty is Seulgi's!" Joy yelled.
Wendy groaned again, mentally thinking how's its practically impossible to stop her girlfriend from killing them after this.

"Just-- Just wait at the lobby! I'll bring it down to you!"

"We want it now!"

"Oh my god just wait there!"

After a few silent seconds passed and Wendy had assumed they both had left, a voice spoke. "You do know we figured out the pin to this house, right?"

They wouldn't

The sounds of the door pin typing in, in fact does prove, They would.

 

Satan had typed the pin is so fast they had no extra time to get decent, and when the front door latched open and came in those two, sudden screeching and screaming erupted in the room.

Wendy quickly turned, covering her girlfriend protectively even though her own white women pale bum was out in the open.
"OH MY GOD" Seulgi yelled covering her eyes with her palm
"MY EYES" Joy screeched
"WHY ARE YOU GUYS " Seulgi asked her eyes tightly shut
"OH I DON'T KNOW SEUL, TO PLAY MONOPOLY I GUESS"

 

As ridiculous it may have sound, holding her girlfriend close to her and rubbing her back to make her relax from their current situation. Her behind oddly cold and open to two uninvited eyes, Wendy had felt strangely happy. She felt complete. She felt at peace and she felt, at home.

 

 

 

Or so she thought.

 

 

5 months had passed since their embarrassing free show. Irene then realized she still doesn't know a thing about the girl sleeping next to her. She needed to be patient, she knows. It takes time to build trust and she understands Wendy is not like any other person. But damn it, she was definitely worth it.

 

Irene was usually the one to wake up first. However, these past days everytime she had gotten up, the girl was already up and moving. Irene is aware that Wendy has been struggling with nightmares during her younger days but it had stopped when they started dating, but now, terrifying dreams would haunt her in her sleep and she’d often wake up, panting and shaking.

 

She’d never tell Irene what she dreamed about.
“I can’t remember,” she lied everytime.
Irene noticed a pattern. Sometimes she’d mutter weird words in English and she assumed she was dreaming about her family. But sometimes she'd say her name. Joohyun. And that’s when Wendy truly seemed terrorized.

Until now Wendy hadn’t told her much about what happens in her dream. Everytime Irene mentioned them, Wendy would look away and get silent, until she changed the subject. She decided to respect her girlfriend’s choice.

Irene was preparing breakfast when she felt Wendy's arms around her. Her touch was protective, but soft. It sent eletric impulses through all her body.

“You weren’t in bed when I woke up,” Wendy complained.

“Good morning to you too, Seungwan.”
Irene turned around and pressed her lips on her girlfriend’s.

“Are these pancakes for me?” Wendy asked, looking at the table where Irene had placed a plate of pancakes.

“No, these are mine. Yours are almost ready.”
Irene placed another plate with a small pile of pancakes in front of her. With strawberry jam, she had drawn a smiley face on them.

“Why did you draw a smiley face on my pancakes?”
“To make your day happier,” Irene grinned. “Wait, there’s one detail missing.”

She added front tooth to the smiley face and puffy checks.

Wendy rolled her eyes, trying to hide a smile.
Irene giggled and sat on the chair next to hers. She observed Wendy in silence for a minute before clearing .

 

“So…” she took a bite of her breakfast. “You had nightmares again last night.”
“I did?” Wendy answered after some hesitation.
“Yes and you didn’t mumble this time. You said a name.”

“Whose name?”

"Mine.”

“I can’t remember, sorry.”
Wendy looked away, avoiding eye contact with her.
“What happens to me in your dream , Seungwan?” Irene insisted.
Wendy didn’t answer.
“What did I do in there?”

“Can we please stop talking about this, Joohyun?”
“Why?” Irene confronted. “I don’t understand why you don't trust me enough to tell me things!”
When she looked at Wendy, she was tense. She pushed the plate away, indicating she didn’t feel like eating anymore.

 

“I’m sorry,” Irene apologized. “I said I wouldn’t pressure you and…”

Wendy closed her eyes and sighed, trying to recompose herself by giving her a small smile.

“No. I understand you have a lot of questions. I’ll tell you everything when the time comes. I promise.”
Irene smiled and placed her hand on top of hers.
'I ',   she thought.
Everytime Wendy seemed to be finally feeling comfortable around her, she did something to ruin it. And there was still another question she wanted to ask.

 

“Seungwan,” she announced. “Can I ask you something else?”

“Sure"

“Sohye called yesterday. She said you haven't been going to the office and mentioned how it's been a week since you last went there" she said noticing how Wendy's face shifted, "And the other day Jun texted me how he saw you in your car just staring at nothing"

 

Irene confessed, finally all the things that were haunting her mind was out in the open. The company was doing well, JooWan Financial was doing well. It got to the point where the work load had increased and Wendy had to even hire a few staff to help her out, but it was nothing she couldn't handle They had even managed to rented a whole floor as their office. But still Wendy would always leave the house saying it was something about work, when she could've always done it in her office easily, she was the CEO for sake--

“I don’t know"

“Seungwan-"

"Irene. Can we just-- drop this?"

“Oh.”
Her heart broken into two at the nickname.

 

 

 

 

 

 

. 

 

=============

Irene paused the game she was playing and dropped her phone. She let out a sigh, wondering if she was where she really wanted to be right now. She wanted to return home. But not after the fight they had. Not after the words she said...
"You're suffocating me," she shouted. "You don't give me any space, Irene."

After getting confronted, she started acting distant. She wouldn't tell Irene how she felt or how she was dealing with the situation. Although she said she was fine, Irene could detect she was distressed, maybe a little traumatized.

Then, she noticed Wendy had been sneaking out in the middle of the night for two days in a row. She decided to follow her girlfriend and found out that rather than sleeping she would gaze outside to the sky, untill the moon then replaced to the sun. She had confronted her, begging her to talk to her. But all Wendy responded was a sigh and a promise to talk about it tomorrow.

 

 

But there was no tommorow.

 

 

That morning Irene had woken up to a note on Wendy's pillow, 'I'm sorry but you deserve better'

 

Four months. Four whole months of silence as Irene called and texted her to response but to no avail. At first she stayed at the house, waiting for her, but as weeks passed, the house started to haunt her as it seemed bigger and bigger with loneliness. She had packed her bag to be with a friend.

 

She was distracted when a hand touched her shoulder, "Do you wanna talk about it?" Joy asked.

She scoffed, "She's your friend"

"And I'm your friend too." Joy said taking a seat beside her.

 

Resting her body on the couch, Irene stared at the muted TV. It was quiet, peaceful, all she could hear was the sound of the fan turning.

"Was I stupid for lashing out to her?"

 

"I don't think you're stupid, but... you're dating Wendy. You can't treat her like a regular person"

"How am I supposed to treat her then? Like if I didn't care? Should I just let her live, spend her days alone?" She stood up and raised her voice.

"Irene," Joy said patiently, "something like this.. Is not normal for her. She's scared. She's doubting, I know she meant you no harm"

"Was breaking up with me means no harm?, " Irene argued.

"She's trying, Irene. She has been sending you these letters since you're not responding to her texts. She was not herself back then, as a person who had lived half her life alone-- everything she feels is intensified, she just stayed away to blow off some steam somehow"

Irene remained silent, pensive.
"So this is why she was staying away from me? To ease her emotions?"

"It's possible."

"And... this is what she meant with needing some space?"

"Likely."

"By breaking up with me?" she argued her voice getting higher, "By leaving me alone? I'm sorry but I can't just simply forgive her. Who knows how fast she'll just do all of this again"

 

 

 

"No."
"Joy.."
"She's been in my house crying all week, Wendy. So no, I'm not doing you this favor again"
"Please, she just won't respond to my texts", she pleaded, her letter held out towards Joy
"Like how you did to her these 4 months?"
"Ok, I deserve that"
Wendy told her everything,
"I've been having these dreams where she would pack her bag and leave me alone and - I-- started to doubt. I just wanted to get a breather, to clear all of them away," Wendy told. "She looks at me like if I was about to break and this is exactly what I didn't want!"
"Wendy, have you put yourself in her place?" "Joy asked. "She loves you. She wants to be the anchor you can hold on to."
"I know... I'd probably act the same if something had happened to her. But I'm-- me, she needs to understand..."
"First of all, she see you as her girlfriend and she cares about you, about your mental health "
Wendy sighed,
"I really don't know how to do this... this... girlfriend thing."
Joy laughed, shaking her head.
"Don't laugh, okay? Now I need to find a way to apologize and I don't even know how."
"I think I have an idea."

 

 

"Here. It's today's letter," Joy said taking out a purple note out of her pocket, "Aren't you going to read that one?", she asked
"I don't know," she shrugged. "I ignore her calls and texts, why should I bother with this one"

"Give her a chance ," she patted her gently on the shoulder, "I'm sure she regrets everything she did and is beating herself up for it. Just listen to her."
She pointed to her side. Her phone wouldn't stopped vibrating since they started talking.
"Stop ignoring her," she suggested. "Remember, she feels everything intensified. Even rejection."
Irene sighed opening up the letter and reading it.
'Please come home, I just want to talk'

"You've tortured her enough," she said, "Come on, let's get you home"
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Irene was exhausted. Who knew crying her eyes out would be such a workout. Waiting in the elevator she couldn't help feel that the usual place looked foreign with how long she had left the place.

Mistakes were something Irene could relate to. She had her problems adjusting but she’d found a good groove and was far more patient. Still, she hadn't found herself leaving the women she loves a note asking for a break up.

The hall was especially quiet, the corridor had absolutely no one walking around. Irene had lived there long enough  to know that there was usually something going on, particularly with her not seeing their usual friendly neighbour waking out.

When she crossed the main walkway and approached the foyer, Irene pushed the door open gently and peeked inside.

Her heart caught in at the sight before her. Wendy stood in the middle of the room with her back facing Irene, and she was wearing her dress. The same dress she’d worn when Irene had bought for her as a gift for her graduation.

Wendy give her a bright smile when she finally noticed her and turned around. “Hey,” she said and her grin grew even more.

As she stepped aside, Irene saw a small table that she’d set up with a pair of candles lit and two plates sitting across from one another.

“Seungwan,” Irene whispered as the tears burned behind her eyes. Happy to see her after so long “What…what are you doing?”

She felt a hand fall across her back and realized how close Wendy was standing to her. “Thought I'd treat you something special?”

Anger bubbled in Irene's gut and she moved away from Wendy's hand. “I don't want this.”

“What?” Wendy's voice was suddenly distressed and Irene didn’t dare look at her. “Joohyun I know how this must look but hear me out.”

"Oh now it's Joohyun?" Wendy winced at her voice.

“Why should I?” Irene finally looked up and saw Wendy recoil at the sharpness in her voice. “Why should I listen to you, when you clearly decided to ignore me?”

“I didn’t—Joohyun I know what you said but will you just hear me out? Please?” The desperation in Wendy's voice was enough to keep Irene quiet. Though she held her hard glare and Wendy wavered a bit underneath of it. “I was talking to Seulgi and she said something about how our relationship didn’t work because I wasn’t in a good place and how…I was not functioning well
And she's right, you dated a broken me. I’m stronger and I understand more of what I went through and where I’m going. I—I feel like I can be more for you. I can give you more. I—I love you, Joohyun.”

There was a smile on Wendy's face when she finished and Irene believed every word she said. She had changed, Irene had seen it from the first time she stepped into the house. She was sturdier and more in control of herself. It was wonderful to see and all that Irene had hoped for her when she left.

However, that was the problem. She left, and while Irene supported that now and had accepted in months ago. It didn’t change one simple truth.

“You’re not the only one who changed, Seungwan.” She saw the light in Wendy's eyes dim and it broke her heart. “I’m not—“ Irene gestured at the table and everything Wendy had done. “I can’t do this and I don’t want to. I am tired and I'm only here to grab my stuff. Have you seen my file?"

Wendy gestured with her hand. “I moved it to the bed, it was on the coffee table before but I—I had to move it for this."

“I want to get it and leave. I’m sorry, Seungwan.”

When Irene headed for the door, Wendy spoke. “So that’s it?” Irene looked back because of the frustration in Wendy's voice. “You changed and suddenly you can just forget everything we went through?”

“Is that what you think?” Irene turned and faced Wendy. If they were going to do this, then they were going to do it properly. “You think that I forgot everything we went through?”

“You don’t really seem all that upset that you’re breaking my heart. Just ruin Wendy, pick up your document and leave like it’s nothing.”

Irene shook her head. “What do you want me to say, Wendy? Do you want me to sit down and eat with you and pretend that I didn’t spend the last four months not knowing where you were—not knowing if you were ever coming back? Because that’s what I went through. The time you think I forgot, is the reason why we can’t be together, because I can’t forget it. Because you coming back doesn’t suddenly erase the time we were together when you left me, in the middle of the night, with a ing letter on the pillow.”

If only for a moment, Wendy was taken back by the curse word Irene threw at her. A heartbeat later, she composed herself. “Would you have rather I stayed and kept using you and treating you like crap? Because I left for you as much as I left for myself. I didn’t want to ruin the best thing that ever happened to me but I knew that if I told you I was leaving you would have stopped me.”

“You’re right, I would have—because running away never fixes anything, Wendy. You don’t abandon people!”

Wendy scoffed. “You wouldn’t understand; this is why I couldn’t tell you. It’s not about just leaving you Joohyun, it’s about fixing me. I was so broken I—“ Wendy looked up at the ceiling and Irene saw the tears b in her eyes. She was clearly fighting them with everything she had. “Joohyun, the whispers came back. I wanted to shut it out so bad I felt like dying. How the hell do I tell someone about that? How do I look at you and all the whispers say that you're only here because you pity me and you'll leave me. How do i…explain what it feels like to have everything in your life go well—to wake up next to the woman you love—and still feel sad and hopeless.” A tear slipped away and Wendy let it fall. “How could I look you in the eyes and tell you that you weren’t enough?”

“Because Wendy ,” Irene smiled despite the aching pit in her stomach. “Then I could have changed what I was doing and been what you needed. I could have, at least, had the chance. You made the decision to end our relationship on your own. Without even telling me. So now, I’m making the decision to keep it that way. I’m sorry but…I need to go.”

She saw Wendy swallow thickly and nod, clearly defeated as she stepped over and waved a puff of air to put out the candles. “I left it on the makeup table.”

“Good,” Irene moved to the door. “This doesn’t mean you can’t still be in my life, Wendy. Would you still want to hang out with us tomorrow?”

Wendy wouldn’t look at her, but she shook her head. “I can’t—I mean I want to but I have clients to meet.”

“Okay,” Irene hated asking, but she needed to know. “You still want to be friends, right?”

“Of course I do, we make a great team.” Wendy said matter-of-factly. “The day after I should have time.” Irene nodded with a bit of relief.

“Great,” Irene forced a smile even though Wendy wouldn’t look at her. “I’ll just go get the document and head out. I am sorry, Wendy. I appreciate all you did tonight I just—“

“It’s okay,” Wendy gave her a faint smile that only made Irene feel worse. “Rash decisions have never worked out well for me. I’ve tried to cut them down when it comes to work. Guess I should apply it to personal decisions too.”

Irene felt like she should say more, but the words escaped her. Wendy was sad and there was a pull to close the distance between them and hug her.

I need to get away from here.

“Goodnight, Wendy .”

She nodded and waved as she picked up the plates on the table. Irene suddenly realized how much she had planned out.

Oh Seungwan.

“Night, Joohyun.” Wendy said softly before exiting through to her office without looking back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

===============

The awkward tension mood could slice a chicken in half. The two stayed across each other avoiding eye contact. They were supposed to hang out, all five of them. But when they both had arrived, a text message had came saying something about Yeri's water broke.

 

What the

She wasn't even pregnant.

 

 

Wendy cleared , "You're wearing that black sweater. I like it on you, it looks good." she tried awkwardly to ease the tension. 

"And what about me? Do you still care about me?" Irene just had to try, still hung up how they left off. She knows it's off topic but she hates it, she hates looking at Wendy and having to think that they were judt friends. 

There wasn't a better time to say it. "Of course. I love you. I always have, and I still do, even though my actions haven't shown it."

As she expected, Irene wasn't impressed. Experience had taught both of them that love on its own often wasn't enough. "Tell me that again after you've proven it. Maybe then it might mean something."

"Proven it? How—"

"Prove it by staying afterward."

The haziness in her head grew worse and her heart thudded faster. "I'm back to stay," she promised, reaching inward for all the sincerity she could muster. "I'm not leaving you again."

"You say that, but I don't even know what, if anything, I'll want from you after this.

The thought of returning only to be told she might be too late was unbearable, but she knew Irene was right. She had made the decision for them last time, and kept making it for 4 months. This was Irene's turn, and she would just have to deal with how helpless that made her feel. "I love you. I'll stay, even if..." Even if you don't want me.

 

 

 

"Joohyun, we should talk."

Her oppressive feelings eased a little when she noticed Wendy's gentle pleading look. "I shouldn't have shouted at you," she said, brushing her hair into its proper place and trying to regain her composure. "Especially since you prepared so much for me."

Wendy folded her hands behind her back, and her gaze darted down to her feet. "Actually, I think you should shout at me. It might help."

"What?" A furrow formed in the middle of Irene's brow. "Seungwan. You don't deserve--"

"It's not about what I deserve or don't deserve," Wendy said. "You're hurting as much as me and you've barely shown it. You've listened to me spill my guts, but I haven't listened to you. I want to listen to you."

"Are you sure about that?" Irene said, bitterness creeping into her voice. "I don't think you're going to like what you hear."

"But you need to say it. You can't keep bottling it up. If you do, we won't have a chance at all."

Irene wanted to object, but she knew Wendy was right. She had been hot and cold since Wendy had returned. Maybe she's right. She searched Wendy's face, still uncertain, but she didn't find any doubt, only the sadness and concern that had gutted her earlier. Maybe I've got to burn this to the ground if I want it to grow better.

"I hate you."

Wendy flinched, but didn't speak. The motion almost made Irene stop, but the words were bubbling up inside her, leaking out like steam.

"I gave you everything I had, and you abandoned me. You tried to forget me. I sent you so many texts begging you to come home, and when you finally had the decency to return, you forced me to sit down with you ignoring how you left me behind with a note! You left us all because you didn't have the single scrap of courage it took to ask me and your friends for help. We love you, Wendy! I love you. And you treated that love like it was worth less than dirt."

She waited for a response, but none came. Wendy didn't say anything.

"And that's not mentioning how you didn't trust me to let me in. You forced yourself to not appear weak in front of me to not let it obvious that you need me, And for what? Because you didn't think we needed you, even though I told you over and over and over again that we did. That... that I needed you..." Her voice trailed off, starting to waver with sadness and exhaustion, but one more burst of fury flared up. "Well, you know what? I don't need you anymore. I have gotten used to it and I have done fine without you. And if you leave again—"

"I'm not leaving again." Wendy's hands were warm as they took hers, but the hold was gentle and delicate. Irene knew she shouldn't look at Wendy's face, but she couldn't help it. She nearly drowned as she fell into Wendy's beautiful eyes. Tears rolled from the corners, tracking down her cheeks, and Irene started to cry as well.

"You're not good at keeping promises." She tried to bring a hand to her face to brush away the tears running down to her chin, but Wendy wouldn't let her go. "Don't tell me something you don't mean. I can't go through that again."

"I meant it before, and I mean it now. I'm not leaving. Not unless you look me straight in the eye and tell me to."

Irene didn't speak. There were no words left in her. She felt hollow once more, and she wasn't sure whether that was better or worse than being angry. 

But Wendy seemed to know better than she did. She leaned in, and Irene felt soft lips touch her cheek. The kiss was tender and full of understanding—understanding she wasn't sure she deserved. Wendy had hurt her, deeply, but that didn't give her the right to do the same. She tilted her forehead down a little, resting it against Wendy's. She couldn't voice her apology, or say anything at all, but she hoped Wendy would understand.

"It's okay," Wendy whispered, still squeezing her hands tight. "We're going to be okay."

Something in Wendy's voice made her want to believe it. She closed the gap between their lips, and the kiss unlocked something inside her. Her tears stopped, and warmth flooded through her body, bringing a tide of relief with it. Not numbness, but healing, the kind she hadn't even known she needed. Her legs threatened to give, but Wendy steered her back toward the wall, bracing her against it. Their mouths remained joined the whole way.

Wendy's hands were hesitant when they started loosening the buttons of her shirt, and Irene hurried to offer reassurance. She wanted this. She needed the sense of love and connection  . "It's okay," she said, slipping the words between a string of shorter kisses. In the back of her mind, she realized they were the same words Wendy had said to her. Maybe we're right. Maybe this is right. Maybe we will be okay.

Upon being given permission, Wendy hurried to peel her shirt the rest of the way off. Irene let it fall to the floor, pulling away from the wall to let it slide down her arms. The movement pressed her flush against Wendy's body, and she groaned as a firm thigh slid between her legs. She was doing this for the sake of her feelings, but her body was far from indifferent.

But guilt still burned in Irene's chest. She knew she couldn't let things happen quite like this. I can't let her make love to me while she thinks I...

"... I don't hate you."

Wendy paused in the middle of pulling off her shirt.

"I never did. I've always lo—"

Their mouths met again, cutting off her words. The fresh round of kisses didn't hurt, although the short breaks as they stripped off their clothes were nearly unbearable.

"Don't worry about it." Wendy summoned her strength, sliding one arm under Irene's shoulders and the other beneath her knees. It wasn't difficult to scoop her girlfriend up, and a grin spread across her face as Irene cuddled into her chest.

"I'm not even surprised you can lift me so easily," she murmured, lashes drooping lower. "All that muscle..."

Wendy laughed, stepping over a messy pile of their clothes on her way back to the couch. "Yup. That's the main reason I work out."

One of Irene's eyes cracked open. "So you can sweep pretty girls off their feet?"

For once, the mood was lifted, they were able to joke around as usual, all the hurt and anger forgotten. Wendy already knew the answer she was supposed to give. "One pretty girl. And she's not just pretty. She's beautiful, inside and out."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

===   A Few Years Later   ===

"You're staring again, Seungwan ." Irene said without looking up from her laptop, setting her tea down to the nightstand beside the bed.

The time read 2:37AM. Irene's was on the last bit of her work for the publisher. Her previous book was going well so she'd had to submit another draft before finishing up. And then she can peacefully enjoy the weekend, and maybe the day after that, since she's freeing her load at this very moment.

"Don't you like it when I stare at you this way?" Wendy said, her voice almost an afterthought. She sounded serene and relaxed, like the wind in summer drifting freely to the open air. Irene felt herself blush at Wendy's words. She turned to look at the girl, who, in turn, stared back at her.

Irene always loved Wendy's eyes. It was the color of burnt gold, sunshine drenched in ancient history. It was the color of the trunk of the trees in the forest, the ones who stand tall and sturdy. It's the coffee she drinks in the day. It's everything she sees from the ground up, like the Earth itself, staring back at her. Wendy's eyes were beautiful, and Irene lost herself for a moment in them.

And she would do it again, because Wendy's eyes felt like her entire world has gone and was replaced by never ending comfort of warm solace in the clouds.

"I guess you do." Wendy smiled, her gaze not leaving Irene's.

"What do 26 year-old CEOs do when they're not working, anyway?" Irene asked Wendy teasingly. "Except to lie in bed and watch someone working, I mean. Not that it's distracting, but it is."

"I don't know about other 26 year-old CEOs, Joohyun, but for me, I like to stay at home." Wendy answered as she scooted closer to Irene, and soon enough Wendy's head was resting on Irene's shoulder, idly watching her tap away on her keyboard whilst being submerged in peaceful silence.

"You only stay at home when I force you to." Irene said after a few minutes. Remembering the work Wendy was swimming with as JooWan financial had gotten bigger and bigger.

A short pause. “Because you're impossibly persuasive." Wendy replied, "And... because you're insanely adorable."

Irene smiled. She paused from typing away on her keyboard to really, look at Wendy . It’s unusual for the CEO to be this warm and feely, but Irene liked it nonetheless.

“You know I missed you.” Wendy continued, nuzzling Irene's neck. “Now, come be with me.”

“I am with you,” Irene said, her series of taps on the keyboard continued.

“Not right now, you aren’t.” Wendy said. “In this moment, you aren’t.”

Irene felt her heart drop. With that, she stopped, just like that, and set the laptop aside. It was rare for Wendy to ask for Irene's time, especially when it’s usually the other way around.

“Good girl.” Wendy said teasingly, kissing Irene briefly on the lips. “Now I'm your main attention.”

“And now you know how I feel.” Irene said jokingly as Wendy pulled her in closer, sharing both their warmth against the cold temperature of the room. For a while, all that can be heard was just the patterns of their breathing and the silent buzz of the air conditioning.

“I wish we could stay in this moment forever.” Irene said in a hushed whisper remembering all the travels and places she went with Wendy for her job, facing the girl. She stared at Wendy's eyes again, wanting, hoping, praying, that that particular brown eyes is reserved solely to look at her

“Mmhm,” Wendy mumbled in agreement, cupping Irene's cheek. The cold ring on her finger cause Irene to jump and giggle

“At least we’re home.” Irene said.

Wendy's hands played idly with Irene's hair, and then her lips pressed a light kiss against the older girl's forehead.

“You are my home, baby. ” Wendy smiled.

“And you are mine, too.” Irene replied, leaning forward to kiss her wife .

A kiss so ephemeral, yet it was a promise—a promise that no matter how cruel the world throws you around, you will always belong.

 

A promise to her past self to hold on, as her happiness will soon come.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

+++

Heavily inspired by my other work at ao3 and cecilai aherm's work for the angsty suprise dinner. I had so much fun witting this knowing I'm bound to hurt some of your hearts *evil smirk.
I think that concludes our journey. I had the best time writing each and every chapter out. I'd be more than happy to continue this, but I think of the plot as I write it out and as I got further, the idea just stops? It's like I have no more thing to elaborate? It's like the story has had enough and I too think I'd kept you guys waiting long enough. I wanted to leave with a bang, hence the fluff+comedy+angst combined. I truly hope to see you all someday, and to those you had commented how this fic is one of their favorites-- I have no words. Thank you so much everyone.

 

 

I know I'm just a mere fanfic writer but I just wanted to say that black lives matter, I hope everyone is safe and happy. Be kind everyone