I thought my life was a failure. For my whole life I never achieved something big, I’m not success in everything. I am not considered as someone who lucky enough to win a lottery or win any contests in the world. I don’t have a job because they think I’m not good enough to be work at their company. I don’t have any good relation with great people who could help me get a nice job. So, here I am helping my family run a small noodles house. At least I’m making something.

I am 29 years old but I have never ever been in a relationship before. There are only 2 guys who almost close with me and I thought it will lead us to something, but in the end they were not asking me to be in a relationship or whatsoever. So I think I just give up on love.

I have only 1 best friend who used to be with me all the time, but now she’s busy with her kids and her newlywed’s life. It kinda sad, but I really miss the time I spent with her, all the talking nonstop about everything that happens in our life. And now, all she was talking is about how cute her kids were, how great her marriage life, and other things that I could not related to. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not hate her or anything. I feel happy for her finally get a life she wants. I just missed the time we’re spending together …

Please don’t ever think that I never live my life with efforts. I do have those times when I have such a fire and fight spirit, but when you try so hard and hoping that it will works this time, it never happened. Failures and disappointment is my best friends, they will follow me everywhere I go.

“Ahjumma! One more beef noodle please.” I heard someone shouted.

I know she was calling me, but since I’m not an Ahjumma, I will not respond to that.

I keep busying myself with something. I try to looks like I’m so focused on read a book in the table, which I don’t know whose books is this.

Ah… I remember, it was belonging to the customer that was too drunk to remember that he was bringing this book so he left in on the table without any intends to come back and take it back.

“Ahjumma!” the girl shouted louder.

I am still 29 years old and I haven’t got married yet, you can see there are no sign of anything on my fingers. This is so embarrassing… Just because she is still young, doesn’t mean she can call someone like me Ahjumma!

What exactly does make her thinks that I’m an Ahjumma?

I looked down and notice that I’m wearing a pair of worn-out jeans, a green loose t-shirt and a flowery apron.

I sighed.

This is why I being called Ahjumma..

“Excuse me, Ahjumma!”

“Ne…” I give up.

Yes, I give up. I give up with my life. I don’t care anymore if everyone calls me Ahjumma from now on, because I deserved it. My life is over. I think I started it wrong somehow. Did I do something wrong as a kid? Or am I a criminal or a bad person at my previous life? I don’t’ know…

By the way, the noodle house opens from 10 am to 10 pm every day. We never have a day off, why? Because my mom keeps counting how much money we can make a day, and if we’re closing for 1 day a week, how much money we have to lose. Now you do the math...