Seokmin laughed at something Mingyu just said, hitting Wonwoo’s shoulder as a force of habit. The latter was also laughing, nodding along as they listened to Mingyu’s funny stories but unlike his other friends, all his reactions were half-hearted.

It had been an entire a month since your little fight in that empty classroom. He tried so hard to apologize and talk to you so many times but you just wouldn’t budge. He was desperate to make you forgive him. So much so that he even used the hair tie he always has on his wrist as an excuse to meet up with you. So that he can “return” it to you, at least.

You told yourself that he must be out of his ing mind if he thinks you’re going to meet up with him because of a stupid hair tie. It was then, when he really had no excuses left, that he decided to just stop. It took a lot of courage for him and a lot of self-reflection to do it but he did it. He finally left you alone and gave you your much needed space.

He no longer pestered you, flooded your inbox with texts, left you countless of missed calls and even followed you where you were. He stopped… He stopped wanting to meet you when his day didn’t go so well. He stopped wanting to eat outside with you because he can’t cook for . He stopped trying to wonder about what you were doing… where you were… who you were with.

He stopped, but if he was to be very honest with himself or anybody at that, this was killing him inside. It’s horrible without you. He felt so empty. He realized just how much of an impact you have in his life, just how big of a part you have in it.  

He felt like he had no one to talk to despite being with Hansol and Mingyu for almost an entire day every day. He felt like no one but you truly understood him. None of your friends knew what was going on. He didn’t know how to open up about it and he most definitely felt like he wasn’t in the right position to tell them how you felt about him.

“Yah, Jeon Wonwoo!” he heard Seokmin call, laughing at him a little because he was spacing out again. Wonwoo snapped out of his thoughts and turned to his new friend, forcing a smile. “Are you okay? Something bothering you?” Seokmin had an arm over his shoulder, looking genuinely concerned over him unlike the two es he calls his real friends sitting across them.

“Poor kitten’s lost, Seok. He had a fight with his best friend and she hasn’t talked to him in a month!” Mingyu sighed, shaking his head in disapproval. They very well knew that you two weren’t in good terms but the real reason behind it was kept between the both of you. Luckily, they understood enough not to pester you both about it.

“What? Woah, what the hell did you do?” Wonwoo gave Seokmin a stiff smile. “It was just a quarrel…”  Hansol rolled his eyes at that. “Of course, it was.” He waved a dismissive hand and reached out to give Wonwoo a comforting pat on his shoulder. “Don’t worry too much about it. I’m sure she’ll come around. She’s your best friend after all. She can never be mad at you for too long.”

Wonwoo just nodded. That might be true but he’s afraid he’s really crossed the line this time. What if you don’t come around? What if you actually can stay mad at him? What if… What if you actually can live without him? The mere thought made his stomach lurch. It was a scary thought.

“Alright, alright! This project isn’t going to finish itself so can we get a move on, please?” Mingyu quickly interrupted to bring all their attention back to what they were initially gathered for. Wonwoo heaved a deep sigh and shook his head, forcing himself to focus as he began working on the project again.

You stretched your limbs, letting out a long, tired yawn and recapped your pen. You got up from your desk and plopped yourself on your comfy bed. Alas, you’re finally done with all the papers and projects you needed to pass for this month.

You honestly felt like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders. You felt free. Well… that until the next month rolls in and you have a set of new requirements to fulfill. It’s fine though. To be honest, you didn’t really mind all the work you had to do.

 It was a great distraction and an even greater excuse to avoid a certain someone. That way, you weren’t entirely lying because you were well in fact, busy. It actually helped you cope in some type of way too. Now that your mind was free, now that you’re not really doing anything anymore… you can’t help but wonder how that idiot was doing.

You were still kind of mad at him but not as much as before. Of course, he is your best friend. You have a very soft spot for him. You can’t resist the guy and you actually kind of miss him despite all those mean things he said to you that day.

You hated how weak you were for him but it’s not like you can change yourself just like that, right? You needed time to move on and that’s exactly what you’re doing right now, taking your time. Even if that meant not talking to him or seeing him for an entire month…

Suddenly, a ding sounded out from your phone, snapping you out of your thoughts. You picked your phone up from your nightstand to check and found out that it was actually a notification from the dating app you’re using. Apparently… you’re on tinder now.

You were just bored out of your mind one afternoon. As much as you’d want to hang out with your friends, most of them don’t live anywhere hear you and those who do are the exact same ones who have the same major as Wonwoo. You simply can’t ask them hangout without possibly bumping into your idiot of a best friend so, on a complete whim, you decided to try downloading this dating app.

Sure, you could’ve downloaded any other app to keep you occupied but you figured that… aside from passing time with it, the app might actually help you move on from Wonwoo too. Maybe someone new could take your mind off him? Maybe… you could meet someone who will actually like you back? You at least had to give it a shot, you thought to yourself at that moment.

When you first tried it though, it was uneventful. You matched up with some guys but you really weren’t feeling like continuing any of the conversations you made with them. The following days after that were when it started to become rather interesting for you.

For the first time, you actually went on a date with one of your matches. You had to admit, it was kind of fun but it still wasn’t that much really. He didn’t even talk to you anymore after the date. You didn’t mind because now, you matched with someone new and it actually made you kind of excited.

You quickly checked it out who your new match was but you were probably so passively using this app that you may have forgotten if you really did swipe on this person. You didn’t recognize him at all but he does seem like your type.

You messaged him with a simple hello to start it off. You were about to put your phone back down after sending your small greeting but then it dinged again, showing you that your match has replied. “Hey, there beautiful,” his message read, making the tips of your lips tug into a smile. And just like that, you two began shuttling messages back and forth.

At first, you had to admit that the conversation was kind of plain and boring. That’s probably how all your conversations began on this app anyways but then this guy started to talk about interior design and houses which you were a big nerd for. He sparked your interest right away. From tiny, one to two sentences worth of replies, you suddenly started to send long paragraphs to each other.

Without knowing, you were already grinning way too much and staying up much later than you should be because of your conversation. It just really felt nice to you, being able to immediately click with someone in only a little amount of time like that. You’ve never experienced such a connection with anyone so it made you feel all giddy and you simply couldn’t stop talking to him.

Well… anyone except Wonwoo, that is…

Wonwoo and his group were at the final stage of their project. It was almost done but they still had some tweaking to do. All of them were at their usual meeting spot, working on the project while Seokmin was basically smiling like an idiot, texting away on his phone.

“Yah! Are you going to help or do you want me to throw your phone away?” Wonwoo glared at Seokmin in a joking manner while the latter grinned back sheepishly. He finally put his phone down and immediately apologized. “You’ve been crazy happy these days. Do you have a girlfriend, Seok?” Mingyu mumbled distractedly as he continued to work.

Seokmin giggled, smiling a little too wide for his own good. “No, just someone I met on tinder.” The three other males exchanged weird looks and laughed at him. Hansol then judgingly said, “What? You actually use that app?” Seokmin flashed him a weak glare, pouting a little when he said,  “What about it?”

Hansol chuckled and shrugged his shoulders, fixing a part of the model that he messed up from laughing earlier. They became quiet after that and went back to changing and fix a couple more things. They were all so serious until Mingyu randomly asked, “So have you scored yet?”

Hansol laughed once again while Wonwoo just rolled his eyes. Seokmin simply shook his head. He still had a small smile on his lips thought. “We haven’t even met in person yet.” Hansol laughed even louder at that. “What?! What the , Seok? You’re so lame.” Seokmin gave him a deadpanned look, throwing him one of the materials they were using in annoyance.

“We have our reasons, sheesh. Do you guys want me to ditch you on this project then?” Hansol finally quieted down and put his hands up in surrender.  He muttered a quick apology to which Seokmin just rolled his eyes at and continued on, saying, “But… we’re actually meeting up today after this.”

That little grin he always wore was back on his face, making Mingyu clucked his tongue. “So that’s why you asked if you could leave early.” Seokmin chuckled sheepishly. “I can though, right?” The tall male pursed his lips in thought before turning to the other two. He asked them if they were okay with it and they both just nodded.

“Yeah, sure. We wouldn’t want you to miss your ing tinder date,” Wonwoo joked, smirking at the now ecstatic Seokmin. He flashed Wonwo his widest, brightest smile and said his thanks along with a very cheeky, “Maybe I can score tonight then.”

He so cockily winked at them that Wonwoo had to scoff. “On the first meeting? Wow, Lee Seokmin.” They were laughing at Seokmin yet again since he seems to be the person they chose to gang up on and tease today. “So? Isn’t that how this works? You swipe, you talk, you meet then you ?”

He was obviously joking. Seokmin wasn’t that type of guy and they all knew that but to play along, Mingyu clapped his hands slowly and acted as if he was in disbelief. “Wow, spoken like a true douchebag. Whoever this girl is, she better watch out.” Again, they burst into laughter. The boys continued to tease Seokmin and joked around until they finally finished.

Surprisingly, they were done with their project much earlier than expected and decided to call it a day not long after. Since Mingyu’s apartment is the nearest to the university, he was the one who’s going to keep it until they need to hand it in. Hansol went with him to help him carry it so the only people left were Seokmin and Wonwoo.

Seokmin was excitedly texting his date while Wonwoo silently kept his things. “You’re meeting her here?” he murmured just as he zipped his bag to a close. “Yeah, since she’s from the same university anyway.” Wonwoo nodded. He stood up from his seat and patted Seokmin’s shoulder jokingly saying, “Alright then, I better leave before she comes. Don’t want to interrupt you two.”

He gave him cheeky wink and waved goodbye, Seokmin laughing and doing the same. Just as Wonwoo was about to get going, he saw you coming their way and immediately froze. Seeing you again after so long made all sorts of weird feelings swirl inside of him. What the hell were you doing here? What does this mean? Were you finally going talk to him again?

You sent Seokmin one more quick text before finally looking up from your phone. You were still a bit far from where he was but you can already make him out. There seemed to be another person there too but you just guessed that it was his groupmate since he did say they had just finished working on their project.

You were grinning, eager that you were finally going to meet him in person but when you got closer, your chest suddenly tightened and your feet almost refused to move. The moment your eyes met, your stomach started to churn uncomfortably. No ing way… That’s not… Why’d you have to see him? You were doing so well trying to forget your feelings for him but then...

Seokmin suddenly called out your name, snapping you out of it. He waved his hand at you excitedly and rushed past Wonwoo to meet you half way. Seokmin seemed eager to finally meet you too but you no longer felt the same… Now, all you could do was force out a smile and try not to get distracted by your best friend.

You were trying so hard not to even glance his way but you could still see him in your peripheral vision. “We finally meet!” Seokmin beamed at you. All you did was chuckle, not knowing exactly how you were going to respond to that.

You could feel Wonwoo staring at you and it was so unnerving that you didn’t know how to act all of a sudden. “You’re a lot more beautiful in person, wow. Let me look at you,” Seokmin said as he gently grabbed your face. He scanned your face with his lips gradually tugging into an adoring smile. He was so close to you and his smile was so gorgeous that you couldn’t help but blush a tiny bit.

He smiled even wider seeing the pink on your cheeks. As he let go of your face, his immediately found yours. He twirled you around playfully to see more of you. That entire time, Wonwoo was just staring at the both of you, his blood boiling.

Didn’t you notice him at least? Were you really going to play like this? Blatantly ignore him when he’s literally right there? He was getting so irked he wanted to punch something and he didn’t know why but he wanted that something to be Seokmin’s face.

After you two talked for a bit, Seokmin finally turned to Wonwoo who surprisingly hasn’t left yet. He walked back to where he had been standing. You thought Seokmin was just going to bid him farewell but the guy beckoned you over and even introduced you to Wonwoo, clearly not knowing that you two actually know each other… and very well at that. You didn’t know what to say or do…

It happened too unexpectedly. You were overwhelmed and flustered. You didn’t really expect to see him, let alone find out that he and Seokmin were acquainted in some type of way. You just stood near Seokmin, almost as if you were going to hide behind him. You couldn’t look at Wonwoo properly and the awkwardness that filled the air was becoming suffocating for you.

From the little glances you took, you saw the look in Wonwoo’s eyes. It was so intense and fiery it scared you. It made you feel small under his gaze. “I’ll take my leave” is all he says after staring you down without even saying a single word to you.

Seokmin, still oblivious, merely waved at him. He was too happy to notice the tension that had been so evidently there. The moment Wonwoo was out of sight, you let out the breath you were unknowingly holding. Seokmin then turned to you, smiling once again as he said, “Let’s go?”

Wonwoo was nibbling on his finger nails, pacing back and forth in his room. It was nearing ten in the evening and although he still had a lot of work to do, he didn’t do any of it. He just couldn’t focus on any of them at the moment. He was very preoccupied. He was worried… a little mad too but mostly worried.

After your little encounter earlier, all he could think about was you and Seokmin. What could you guys be doing? Where could you be going? What was Seokmin saying to you? What were you saying to Seokmin? Are you two getting along well? Are you having fun on your date? He didn’t know why he had all this stupid questions but they kept repeating and repeating, floating around aimlessly inside his head.

It was beyond annoying and was pissing him the off. But, it was later when he got home that he realized why he should be more worried than pissed right now. Because it was then that he remembered what Seokmin had said to them earlier.

“Maybe I can score tonight?”

“So? Isn’t that how this works? You swipe, you talk, you meet then you ?”

Wonwoo knew it was a joke as much as the other two did. He knew as well that Seokmin was a good guy despite not knowing him for that long but he couldn’t help feeling bothered by it. Thinking about what he said and how he said it even if he didn’t mean it was eating him out alive. You’ve never been intimate with any other man but him… the thought of you with Seokmin just…

“Urgh!” Wonwoo groaned loudly, messing up his hair in frustration. He was suddenly pissed all over again. He stormed out of his bedroom, grabbing his coat and walking straight to your apartment. He didn’t even know if you were home yet but he didn’t care. He’ll wait for you to arrive if he had to. He wasn’t sure either if you were even going to pick up his call but he tried to call you anyway.

By some miracle, you actually did pick up. He opened his mouth, about to ask you where you were but he paused when he heard you giggling on the other line. “Seokmin, stop that!” You said in between little giggles. Wonwoo even heard Seokmin say something but he was too far from the phone for Wonwoo to make out what he was actually saying.

Oddly though, the boy’s grip on his phone tightened and his chest moved with his angry breaths. “Sorry… Hello? Who’s this?” you murmured after finally composing yourself. “What? Did you delete my number or something? It’s Wonwoo…” Hearing his voice made your grin fall and you became very silent. It was almost as if you stopped breathing.

Wonwoo heard Seokmin ask you who you were talking to but before he could hear a reply from you, you hung up on him. A nerve snapped. Wonwoo’s hand shook with anger as he stuffed the device into his pocket and charged for your house. 

You were actually about to head home when Wonwoo so randomly called you. Seokmin was supposed to drive you there but you suddenly had a bad feeling about it. You insisted on going home by yourself instead. Obviously, Seokmin said no.

He said it was too dangerous for you to go home by yourself at this hour but you kept insisting anyway until he caved in. That is, on the condition that he’ll take you home every day after school from now on. It wasn’t that bad of a deal so you quickly just agreed to it and you were on your way.

As you were riding the bus though, for some reason unbeknownst to you, your heart was pounding uncomfortably in your chest. You had a gut feeling that something was going to happen but you had no idea if it was something good or bad. Every step felt heavy when you stepped out of the bus and went into your apartment complex.

You were completely spaced out inside the elevator, thinking about how you stupidly picked up your phone without even looking at the caller ID. It’s just that, you were so distracted by how much fun Seokmin and you were having that you didn’t even mind checking. You panicked when you found out that the caller was apparently Wonwoo so your hung up on him.

You closed your eyes briefly and mentally face palmed as you exited the elevator. You walked straight to your door and quickly keyed in your passcode. When you went inside your apartment, your heart almost stopped.

Wonwoo was in your apartment and he looked anything but happy. He had a scowl on his face, his jaw clenched tightly and just by the way he shoulders moved as he breathed, you knew he was raging mad at you right now. “Won—”

“You’re really trying to test my patience, aren’t you?” He immediately cut you off. “I already apologized for what I said that day. I really meant it and I tried everything for you to forgive me but you were too stubborn! I gave you your space even. I left you alone but don’t you think it’s too much that you went as far as to delete my number and pretend like you don’t even know who the hell I am when I was right there in front of you?” he snapped.

Your chest started to squeeze. You can’t believe you and Wonwoo are going to fight again. This wasn’t like you two. Things really have changed between you but you didn’t expect it to happen this fast or become this bad. You wanted to explain yourself but the words were just not coming out of your mouth. There was a huge lump in your throat that was blocking it.

Wonwoo could see that you were at the verge of tears. Unlike a month ago, his anger died down enough for him to notice and immediately, he felt himself soften up. He was extremely pissed but then you come along with your sad, glassy eyes and he felt like crumbling. He felt defeated. He groaned in frustration, punching the wall beside him. “You’re so unfair! You can’t play with me like that!”

Your brows pinched in disbelief, your tears just welling in your eyes. The nerve of him to accuse you of playing with him when he was one playing with your feelings all along. You held back your tears the best that you could and tightly balled your hands into fists. “All I know is that I’m trying to do the best I can to get rid of my stupid feelings for you,” you muttered back, annoyed.

“I’m doing this for you so you don’t have to feel guilty or pity me! Do you know how selfish you’re being right now? All you’re thinking about is yourself and what you feel! What about me? What about me, Wonwoo?” Your voice cracked when you yelled at him and there go your tears. You suddenly felt weak and exhausted. Until when? Until will you have to cry because of him?

Wonwoo felt like he’s been punched in the gut with what you just said. You should’ve slapped him. That would’ve stung a lot less. He still wanted to fight back but he was at a loss of words right now. “Do I have to kneel down and beg?” you whispered, your voice shaking and your tears streaming down your face uncontrollably.

You hated begging and Wonwoo knew this. For you to slowly drop to your knees and bow your head, must’ve meant that you’re seriously so done with all this. “Please, Wonwoo. Let me move on… I’m sorry I have to be distant from you. I’m sorry I’m ruining our friendship but that’s the only way I know how I can get rid of my feelings for you…”

Wonwoo’s didn’t even notice that he too was now crying. All the anger from moments ago was replaced with hurt. He knelt down with you, embracing you tightly. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered into your hair. You sobbed hearing him say that with such a soft, broken tone. You can’t believe he was crying now too. Wonwoo, the strongest person you knew, was crying because of you.

It hurts. Everything hurts. “Please just… Just go, Wonwoo…” You heard him inhale a shaky breath, hugging you even tighter. You thought you had to beg again for him to let go but after only a few seconds lingering in that tight hug, he pulled away.

He stood up without a word and looked at you one last time, wanting to and wishing to do more for you but he knew he couldn’t. You saw him hesitate for a split second, a fresh batch of tears running down his cheeks. He was fighting with himself on the inside. With a deep shaky breath, he finally turned around. He walked out of your apartment, roughly wiping at his tear stained cheeks.

| Author's Note |

O U C H

ing, ouch y’all D:

DAT HURT WTF but... I hope this update was okay? lol

Leave your thoughts down in the comments <3