It was weird to go on with his daily routine as if nothing changed. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't afford to slow down and process how Kibum's return had truly affected him. There was too much work. Jinki simply didn't have that luxury. 

The family business was in bad shape for many years. Selling crops was seasonal and the market was becoming too saturated. They just weren't making as much as they did in the past, and Jinki had to present a bold alternative to his family. Some people thought he was so brave to turn their business into something else entirely. But to him, it was just a matter of survival.

There were so many people that looked up to him and were grateful for the opportunity to be employed at their farm. In all honesty, he had enough people on his payroll to be able to sit back and purely focus on the business end of things, but there were certain tasks that he insisted on doing himself. This was one of them. 

Every week, he looked forward to checking in with one of his favorite people on this planet. He unloads his truck and pushes open the familiar wooden storefront door with his back. 

"Hi, Taeyeon," Jinki says, clutching a loaded crate in his arms. "I've got this week's delivery."

"You really don't have to do this, you know," she says, rising from the counter and rushing to help him with the door. 

"And miss bugging you each week? Not a chance."

Taeyeon rolls her eyes as she points towards the back of her grandfather's general store. "I cleared the shelves for you."

"Why do you always have to put my stuff in the back? I thought we were friends," Jinki teased.

"How many times do I have to tell you? People will never stop looking for your food, and they're gonna go through the entire store to get to it. That means an extra sale or two for me. You're staying in the back. It's a business strategy."

The older man chuckles as he goes where he's told to. But not before noticing the new layout on the cashier's counter. Kibum's magazine was front and center, along with what seemed like every back issue that they had in stock. "New decor, huh?"

"Of course! I haven't had the chance to swing by but I'm sure he'll be in here sooner anyway. I just want to make sure he feels welcome. Have you seen him?" Taeyeon says as Jinki disappears behind the shelves.

"Nope," he replies, a knot forming in his stomach. 

Dread comes over him. Gut feelings have always been a sore spot for Jinki. His intuition was always right. The problem was he hardly listened to them. He could have stayed home and finished some orders and avoided this entire thing. He didn't know how he knew, but he knew. Today was the day. It was hard to admit that the thought of what might happen completely terrified him. 

"Well everyone in town is gushing about him: how sophisticated his clothes are, how handsome he looks... But if you ask me, he's always been handsome. I can't wait to see him," Taeyeon says. 

Jinki could feel the hairs at the back of his neck stand as the bell rang and the front door opened. His fears were confirmed when he hears the shop owner's over-enthusiastic greeting. 

"Oh my God!!"

"Crap," Jinki mutters under his breath. Suddenly, his heart beat faster and he was sweating bullets. He knew that this moment would have to happen eventually but he was hoping that he had a little more time to prepare himself. He clenches his fist in the air and closes his eyes tightly, absolutely frustrated with himself. 

There were noises at various pitches coming from the two, Taeyeon in particular, as they did some catching up. But Jinki was too panicked to absorb anything that they were saying. He just wanted to get out of there fast. Peeking through the aisles, he could see that the two were completely engrossed in conversation. If he was really quiet, he could probably creep away without them noticing. The older man moves through the aisles as quietly as he could but it was no match against Taeyeon. Say what you want, but the girl knew her store like the back of her hand.

"--Oh! There he is! Jinki! Come say hi!"  

There wasn't anything else he could do now. The older man takes a deep breath, steps out from behind the shelves and shows himself. He thought time could help him but nothing could have prepared him for this moment. Seeing his old flame again felt like he had finally taken a breath after years of being underwater. Even after everything, Jinki couldn't help the smile that formed on his lips upon seeing his face.

After all these years, he was still... Perfect.

*****

Kibum liked being back home but he felt like he was living in a fishbowl.

Now he knew how celebrities must feel like. It was like he was in a parallel universe where his life wasn't his own. He couldn't walk ten steps without someone waving to him, or shouting at him, or plainly stopping him for a chat. Not growing tired of repeating the same things over and over again was especially difficult.

"Hello... Nice to see you again too. Thank you... Yes, it has been a while... No, not for good, just for a couple of weeks... Yes, she's doing well today... Thank you... See you around."

He had to admit though: It was nice to hear people tell him how they appreciated his work. Maybe all those hours he spent stuck at the office was worth it after all. Even if it was a joy to see everyone again, his back was starting to ache from all the bowing. He puts a hand to his hips, trying to relieve some of the pain.

He remembers last night's dinner as he walks the few yards to his destination. It was odd to talk about Jinki. He didn't even allow himself to think about him, let alone find out what he was up to. It was nice to know he was doing well. At least he had something to say just in case someone asked about him.

Kibum shakes away thoughts of Jinki as he finally happens upon the general store. The bell rings as he swings the door open, and is shocked to see that everything inside the store had changed drastically. The outside was still plain and rustic but the inside looked like any modern local grocery back in the city. Maybe some things have changed.

"Oh my God!!"

A jumping figure made its way from behind the counter. Kibum tried his best to make out who it was but all he could see was hair flopping all around. He suddenly found tiny arms wrapped around him in a tight embrace. A whiff of her shampoo was all that was needed to let Kibum know who it was.

"Taeyeon Noona," he says, finally relaxing into the embrace. The people in his town meant a lot to him, but there are a certain few that he held close to his heart. Taeyeon Noona was certainly one of them. "It's so good to see you."

"Look at you!! Everyone was right!! You look so good!! Wow, Kibum!!" she says, going in for another hug.

"You look really great, too. Even prettier than when I left. Plus, you're running the store now? It looks great, Noona. This is really amazing," he says, looking around with wide eyes.

"Do you like it?? Look, we always keep your magazine in stock. Everyone buys a copy each month just to see what you're up to. I can't believe you're here! Jinki and I were just talking about you!"

Kibum's mouth instantly goes dry. "Jinki? He's here?"

"Yeah! Wait, let me find--Oh! There he is! Jinki! Come say hi!"

*****

"Hyung?" Jinki had been sitting alone at the cafeteria that day, oblivious that Minho had been tapping away at his shoulder for the last ten seconds. "Hyung, are you alright? I need to talk to you."

The older man clears his throat and shakes his head as if it could help snap him back to reality. Another lunch hour had gone by with him sulking by himself. It wasn't that he was upset at any of his friends... He just preferred being alone right now. Each day was getting harder and harder for him to go on as usual. It was like his heart had reached a tipping point, and his admiration was now becoming a painful yearning. And it was starting to hurt really bad. 

Minho sits down beside him and looks him dead in the eyes. "You should tell him."

Jinki's heart plummets to his stomach as the words fall on his ears. He had never told a single soul about this. How could he? It terrified him to even utter it to himself out loud. To say that he was utterly panicked was an understatement. He makes a split-second decision to feign innocence.

"What are you talking about?" he asks, quickly gathering his things and rushing out of the room, hoping that the younger man would drop it if he could outrun him. As if he could.

Minho hurriedly follows him into the hallway. There was no way that he was giving up that easily. He gently tugs at the older man's backpack, making him halt. "Hyung, wait. Will you stop? I'm trying to talk to you." 

There was no other choice than to face him. Jinki takes in a deep breath as he realizes that Minho was on a mission. The sooner he complies, the better it was going to play out for him. "Okay, fine. What is it?"

"For the love of God, Hyung. TELL HIM," the younger man says, rolling his eyes in frustration. "Do you think that we don't notice? The only thing you've stared at more than him is your journal, and that's only because you keep sketching his face."

"No, I don't!" Jinki replies defensively. "I make class notes!"

"Really? Show it to me then. Give me your journal," Minho says, making a lunge for the older man's backpack. 

Jinki knew that he was no match for the younger when he starts being this way. The only thing more embarrassing than this confrontation is the look on Minho's face when he sees that he's right about the journal. He holds his hands up in an attempt to stop his annoyingly fast friend. "Stop! Stop! Okay!" 

A huge smile breaks out on Minho's face. 

"Fine, okay... I'll admit it..." Jinki says, feeling defeated. "Maybe I have a crush. So what?"

"A crush? Hyung, no. Crush was three years ago. You're way past that point now."

There was no arguing with that.

"Am I really that obvious?" the older man asks.

Minho flings his head back in laughter and throws his arm over Jinki's shoulders. "If you were any more smitten, you would melt into a puddle."

"No, I wouldn't! I wouldn't," Jinki says, the certainty in his voice fading.

"This will answer your question: What would you say if I asked you to describe Kibum in one word?"

That single word instinctively came to him, not even having to think about it before it escaped his lips.

"Perfect."

He was absolutely perfect. 

Jinki's words hung in the air for what seemed like a painful eternity. Kibum was visibly shaken to see him standing there, and the older man did his best not to make the situation any more awkward than it was. It's funny how a single moment can erase years of doubt.

"Welcome home. I hope your visit is going well."

Taeyeon was watching this exchange, slowly realizing that things weren't okay between the two men. She grabs Kibum's hand and squeezes it--as if to apologize for pushing them into this situation. Her eyes try to catch Jinki's as well, but he is staring intently at someone else. 

"Thanks, Jinki."

The two obviously needed to be left alone to clear the air. And Taeyeon couldn't wait to get out of the way.

"I have to... Uh... The stock room! I need to check the stock room. If someone needs me, tell them I'll be right back," she says, scrambling to leave.

The throbbing of Jinki's heart felt like a steady drumbeat in his ears. He imagined this moment so many times, in so many different ways, throughout the years. He had thought of everything he wanted to say, everything he wanted to do... But now that Kibum was standing in front of him, everything else flew out the window. All he could do was stare. Like he always did.

The older man clears his throat. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to make it to dinner last night. Your Eomma called mine but I'm drowning in work right now..."

"Oh. It's okay... I get it. Work always comes first," Kibum says, his voice trailing off. The way Jinki was staring at him was completely disarming. 

"Yeah... Maybe I can join you guys some other time before you get back to the city."

"Sure," the younger man says. "That would be nice."

"So... I kind of have to get back to the farm... Invoices... Packing... You know," Jinki says awkwardly. He tries to move towards the door but moving past Kibum was tricky. The two get stuck clumsily sidestepping one another until they are able to switch positions, with Jinki ready to head out the door.

Kibum didn't know what came over him, but seeing Jinki sparked something. After spending all this time being doubtful, wary, or even scared... Right now, he felt nothing but bravery. He was suddenly fed up with all the years of loose ends. "I know this might be a bit rude but can I come by later? Just to talk?"

The proposition surprises the older man. "Uh... Sure," Jinki finally replies. "Is after five okay?

"Yeah. Thanks," Kibum says, delighted that he wasn't rejected. "I'll see you then." They both give each other weak smiles as the older man walks out of the store.

Jinki smiles and closes the store door behind him. He quickly gets into his truck, his body still buzzing from the exchange. He didn't expect Kibum to be the one to touch base with him, but it was certainly a welcome gesture. Maybe they would finally get the closure they had been wanting for all these years. 

"It's time," he whispers to himself.