You had given some time to think, yet not necessarily think of you and Doyoung and how things would go in the future. It wasn’t even that long since you first met Doyoung. He was one of Taeil’s closest friends and happened to be Sooyoung’s friend too. Somehow you just got along very well with him, pretty much because he was the one with greater brain cells and wasn’t as noisy as the others. Taeil was known to be the calmest too—that was why you basically had good feelings towards him back then, but Doyoung had another aura of calmness that somewhat matched with you. Especially after that ‘giving Taeil some space he needs’ moment, Doyoung showed up almost everyday in your life. The day you and Taeil took the big break and the day your project with Doyoung started were pretty much in the same week. You would say the timing was coincidentally somewhat perfectly fit. This was what Dahee mistook. She always thought Doyoung was there to cheer you up. While he was there because he had to be there since you were groupmates. On the other hand, you didn’t really realize it but you were just being okay to have him on your side. You didn’t really feel anything since he was just a friend to you. What you were thankful of him because he not ever once mentioned Taeil whenever you were together. And for you, that was what makes him a good friend.

Another thing thay you may not realize in detail, was that even when you were separated by different projects, Doyoung still came to visit you everyday. Be it a lunch, a quick coffee break, or a moment to catch a fresh air on the rooftop. Sometimes he even would wait for you when you had to work overtime, then you would go home together since you lived in near neighborhood. But still, to you, he was nothing more than a good friend. You never expected him to cross the line, as simple as because he was Taeil’s close friend.

Now that your friends were trying to blur that line, you were confused not because you started to develop feelings for him. But because you still had some faith in your relationship with Taeil. And you felt that the sparks with Doyoung were different compared to when with Taeil. You were not even sure if there were butterflies in your belly.

‘Even if we fall apart over frequent fights
What’s important is us
So it’s not meaningless
It’s just taking another step forward
So whenever you ask me again how I feel
Please remember, my answer is you’

Your hands abruptly stopped typing on your laptop the moment that song was played randomly. Your eyes slowly peeked at the man who had kidnapped you in the morning to work on an individual report at his place. “What do you say if I… try to talk to Taeil again?” you asked hesitantly.

Doyoung who was sitting across you diagonally was stunned. He immediately closed his laptop and faced you. “Why?” he asked back.

“Do I really need a reason?”

“Yes. First, why do you ask me for an opinion? Second, why would you do such a thing?”

You shrugged very slowly as you tilted your head. “Uh.. I’m just asking? And simply because you’re friends with him.” You could tell your eyes were quivering, not so sure if you should directly make an eye contact to him or not.

“Are you sure you want to give it another try? You did this before. You remembered how he responded.”

Honestly you had never seen him being so serious like this, except at work.

“Yes. But, you know, we… we sort of talked when we met at Kyuhyun’s concert,” you said slowly with some hesitation. You couldn’t even look at Doyoung in the eyes because somehow you noticed a little fire in his eyes.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t make the first move. Not anymore after some attempts had been done before.” He pushed his laptop away and started to tidy up his papers.

You sat still, unable to respond him because most of his words were undeniably correct. Deep down inside, you still had somewhat hopes. You just wished there was someone who would root for you. And you simply thought Doyoung would be that someone.

“Jena,” he called, making you turn your head facing him. “Jena, I don’t want to see you sad.” His face looked very concerned. “Your smile, your happiness. That’s what matters.”

Without you knowing yourself, your eyebrows started to furrow. The slight smile on your lips was also completely fading away. “Do you think he and I won’t be alright? Even if I want to try again?” You paused to take a breath. “And maybe, he wants to try again too?”

Your words got him speechless, let alone your expression. That was probably the first for him to see you like this, to argue about something that matters a lot for him. Another reason why you get along very well was because you barely disagreed over anything. You always had similar preferences, you always said yes to his opinion and so did he to yours. And now, arguing about your relationship with Taeil? How does it make any sense to him?

You didn’t realize how much he struggled to keep his head cool and his lips to stay smiling. He really tried hard to suppress his emotion. “Let’s not talk about this,” he muttered as he got off from his seat. “Anyway, it’s past lunch time. Kimchi fried rice?”

You were secretly disappointed that even Doyoung couldn’t support your intention trying to make it work again with Taeil. You used to be the one who avoided the topic of Taeil. Now that you were the one who brought this up, Doyoung now avoided it and you were upset.

“Or do you prefer to order jjajangmyun?” he asked again from the kitchen.

You quickly faked a smile. “I’m good with anything.”

- - - - - - - - -  »

Both your team and Doyoung’s just had a long day after a big presentation. Although it was a joint project, the assessment was done separately for your team and Doyoung. And somehow Doyoung’s team took a longer time. That night you and your team decided to go with Doyoung’s team members for a celebration.

One of the things you shared in common was not being fond of night club and drinking. But that night was an exception. Thank goodness there was a gentle man named Qian Kun around who nagged everyone to not get drunk so everyone can get home safely. This gentle man also kept stopping your hand from having another glass of drink because he knew how you may lose control due to low tolerance of alcohol. Eventually, you and Doyoung were the ones leaving the club first. Neither of you was drunk, thankfully. But somehow Doyoung was being extra and unusually clingy. He did look tipsy a bit, but all he drank was only cocktail.

“Let’s go to my place,” he said with his dreamy eyes. He hugged the steering wheel before he the car. His head was leaning against the honk carefully, and his face was looking towards you who sat beside him. “Jungwoo and Hyuckie will come home late. I don’t want to be alone.”

“What’s gotten into you?” You chuckled. “All you’ve wanted the whole time is a quiet time without them.”

He smiled at your words. He was happy to hear you bring up the chaos the younger boys always caused in his place, which meant that you remembered his rants and always paid attention to his stories. “Please?”

You wanted to refuse. But he just activated his puppy bunny mode as he stared at you with his round eyes.

“Please, Jena?” he repeated himself.

You rolled your eyes. Not because you’re annoyed. It was simply because you can’t say no to that bunny face. “Okay. Your place it is.”

This exceptional night got you to see another side of the bunny boy being clingy and needy. Even you and Taeil were very modest when comes into skinship. Holding hands and linking arms, and that was pretty much all. But with Doyoung, he just casually hugged you, having his arm around your shoulder. Or, since he was being extra now, he rested his head on your shoulder. His arms were folded tightly. You mimicked his arms gesture.

“I’m exhausted. We should have never gone to the club again,” he mumbled as he shut his eyes.

"Yeah, I know.” You started getting flustered by every single thing he did but you decided to stay calm.

“Can I hug you?”

“Wha—?”

“Please?”

You tried hard not to blush. You knew you’re going to stutter if you talk. So you just nodded. That was weird and awkward already. Why would he ask for a hug? Did it feel weird because it was just the two of you in the house? Probably. You had never been alone like this before. It was always crowded with the other team members and they would hype up the room. This was the first time for you to spend a very quiet moment with Doyoung and him being very physically close to you. And you never imagined this. Not even once.

Doyoung repositioned himself and put his whole body slightly lower than you. So his forehead made a direct contact against your neck and his arms wrapped around your waist. You tried hard to relax because you can feel how tensed you were, moreover you were confused where to put your arms.

“Why don’t you hug me back?” he mumbled.

“Ah, okay..” You hesitantly looped your arm around his shoulder, and your other arm around his neck, with your hand slightly caressed his hair on the back of his head.

“I think I’m going to sleep for a while. Wake me up in 20.”

You thought it was his cue to be released. But he immediately stopped you when you loosened your embrace.

“Stay like this, please?” he pleaded as he held your hand, putting it against his cheek.

Your eyes couldn’t stop looking at the clock. It was only 5 minutes after Doyoung dozing off in your embrace. You switched his cheek and brushing his fluffy hair behind his ear. If you stop, he could sense it and woke up just to make sure you continue what you were doing.

You wondered if 20 minutes is that long. And suddenly you could heard the front door was opened. Jungwoo and Donghyuk must be home. Then you panicked internally realizing your position which was locked in Doyoung’s arms and impossible to move. It just made you think hard how to be not awkward with the boys.

“Whose shoes is it?” You heard Donghyuk ask.

“Maybe Jena noona.” Jungwoo answered. This alone raised your nervousness. Jungwoo guessing it right was a big mystery for you. “Doyoung hyung, you’re home?” asked him with a loud yet soft voice.

They made their way to the living room to find you frozen with Doyoung sleeping in your arms. The boys made an ‘o’ shape with their mouths. It was a shocking-but-not-surprising moment for them apparently.

You smiled awkwardly to them. “Hi, guys.”

“Hi, noona. Hyung is giving you a hard time, huh?” Jungwoo greeted you with such a friendly smile. “We’ll be in our room. Call us if you need anything.”

“Noona, please, make yourself at home. Relax a bit, will you?” Donghyuk chuckled teasing you, noticing how tense you looked.

Another 10 minutes finally had passed. Looking at the sleeping bunny, suddenly you didn’t have a heart to wake him up because he looked very peaceful, and tired at the same time. You decided to let him sleep a bit more.

Jungwoo came out for a water break, then stopped by at the living room, observing you and Doyoung in silence for a while. “Noona, may I join you?” he asked politely with a low voice, approaching you in his tippy-toe hoping not to wake Doyoung up.

“Sure.”

Jungwoo took the single couch beside you. “I miss you hanging with us. All of us.”

You just smiled weakly at his words.

“But I understand. We don’t want to make things even more awkward. Honestly it when things are awkward between us.”

You smiled again. Your hand still continuously gave gentle on Doyoung’s cheek.

“It too when we have to choose between you and Taeil hyung. And now Doyoung hyung too goes to your side. It becomes harder for us to divide fairly.” He let out a small chuckle.

“I’m sorry. I never intend to make things complicated between you guys.” You sighed. “I must look like the bad person, right? I’m not finished yet with Taeil, but here I am now.”

“Please, don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault. Taeil hyung is at fault, and everyone agrees. Even Hyuckie, the closest one to him thinks so. He shouldn’t do that to you.”

You smiled at the kind boy. “But still, you don’t have to divide yourselves just to hangout.”

“Anyway, Noona, what I’m trying to say is, if you’re happier with Doyoung hyung, you should go for it.”

You remained silence. Your smile slowly disappeared. You were not even sure about the line that just got blurred between you and Doyoung. And you would be lying to yourself if you denied not thinking about Taeil. “How is Taeil? How about him?” You just had to ask this. Your poker-face was on.

“Noona don’t have to think about him. He’s just being his usual self,” Jungwoo said, smiling softly, as he stood up to leave you again. “Ah, he’s been very clingy to Sicheng. Sicheng is going to China very soon.”

You couldn’t smile at his answer. You didn’t understand why he convinced you like that. Why did no one support you and your relationship with Taeil? Everybody makes mistakes. Everybody learns from that mistakes. Was Taeil’s mistake unforgivable? Why did everyone think you and Taeil can’t make it?

You looked down, checking out the sleeping boy as you brushed his hair with your fingers. Your other hand stopped caressing him, instead you placed your hand on his arm that wrapped your waist.

“Noona.” Jungwoo popped out his head from his room, distracting you. “If you stay over, you can use Doyoung’s room.”

You flustered. “Oh, no, I’ll go home. Just help me wake him up, will you?”