A week had passed and I went on with my daily routine. We were in October.

The two first days that followed this meeting and this unbelievable story, I had some trouble to stay focused on my work. I kept thinking about this, how it happened so fast and ended so fast. I had some kind of notoriety : many followers kept on following me on Twitter and found my Instagram account – it was the same name, actually. Rumors about me dating Jungkook began to spread all over the internet. I used to have like a hundred followers on Instagram, and it was reaching two thousands. I had never received that much love and hate. A korean webjournal even asked me some questions about how it happened and I wasn't quite sure if I could answer them without causing some trouble for BTS. Some brands came to me and asked me to work with them. It kind of flattered my ego but I wasn't sure about all of this. My friends and family were really surprised but they encouraged me to keep going with the flow. « You never know ». They said it could make me happy. Improve my self-confidence and my self-esteem. I went abroad to change my life or, at least, to wake me up from this terrible nightmare I put myself in for years.

I had never been a confident person and I had been hating myself for years and years. Actually, I couldn't even remember the time I didn't hate myself, I must have been so young when it all started.

I was born in the South of France and had two brothers : one bigger by seven years, Marc, and one younger by five years, Mael. I could say that I also had one sort of a sister, Carole. We first met in kindergarten and went to the same schools, in the same classes. We were actually apart for two years : third grade and sixth grade. Anyway, my brothers and I were good siblings, getting along very, very well and sharing lots of secrets despite our gap ages. My parents loved each other but had many problems for years surrounding them such as lake of money, bad friends, my dad's alcoholism, my mom's cancer and so on. Their lives had finally become easier only two years ago when my dad quit drinking. Mine too, in some way : I quit hating my dad and resenting my mom. I remember when I was a teenager, I used to hate them from the bottom of my heart. I hated everyone but kept on smiling and being nice to protect myself. I kept on for years, being this cute little perfect girl everyone loved, polite and serious, until I was 15 and decided to quit doing all this . I was a brilliant student and kept my scores high but did things I shouldn't have done in my parents' back. I started smoking, drinking, ing. I also discovered the incredible power of starving myself to get some control on the only thing I could actually control. I felt so free. Well, I tried to feel something in what was beating so painfully in my chest.

« Maya, don't you want to go karaoke ?

- Karaoke ? You serious, right now ? I laughed. I don't sing.

- Don't you ? Lizzie smiled at me. Oh come on ! Let's have some fun !

- Is that actually funny ? Cause I don't think so...

- I want to go, please ! Anna begged. We don't care if you're a bad singer, just come ! You said you've never done it, you're living in Japan, you know that ? »

I laughed and rolled my eyes. I eventually accepted to go there with my two roommates.

Three hours later, we came back home. It was almost midnight when I found a small package on the shoe cabinet. My name was written on it. It was very light and seemed empty ; I shaked it a few times before bringing it upstairs with me.

« Is that a gift from a brand ? I asked myself. I'm getting so much of those... »

I stopped. There were BTS last album and a small letter inside the box with some plastic stuff to protect everything. I never bought any of their albums, it was my first one of them. I used to listen to BTS and look at idols from far away, I had just downloaded their albums on my music app. They were being so nice to me. I took the letter ; it was an official Big Hit Entertainment envelope. I opened it carefully.

Miss Calmel,

Here are two VIP tickets to come to our

concert in Tokyo Dome.

Let's meet each other from 5pm there.

Again, thanks for everything,

BTS

It was pretty impersonal but that was enough to make me smile. I had been to lots of concerts but never one of idols ; this should be interesting. There was a small map behind to explain me how to get to them and a tag to put around my neck when the days would come. My full name was written on it and under it “VIP VISITOR”.

I felt so special.

« Two tickets, though. »

I looked down on them and guessed the only person that could go with me would be Ako. My roommates weren't into idols and, in fact, I only had two places. I quickly sent a short message to Ako, asking her if she was available for a BTS concert in late November, in less than two months. I waited for her to answer then, as the answer wasn't coming, I put my phone on my desk and turned the lights off.

Days passed by and, as they did, I was reliving. Forgiving people of my past. Forgiving myself, moving forward.