Our apartment is now much more cozier than before. When i was alone i used my flat only to sleep here a bit but with Taehyung it feels like home. I am not pushing him into anything and don’t use yelling or fear as parents did. I tried to find some school for him but he is 22 so I didn’t succeed. Luckily my boss Bang Si Hyuk is okay with it and let me take Taehyung with me in the music studio. He is the best boss on Earth. 

I got up and cooked only slightly burned pancakes. Then i need to wake him up. I slowly opened door of his bedroom and smiled. His room has baby blue walls and there are only few pieces of furniture. White desk with chair, wardrobe and his bed. On floor are many colorful carpets with different designs. In one corner is laying pile off blankets and walls are decorated with small stars. There are also few snow globes and stuffed animals. That is Taehyung’s calming corner.

I carefully overstepped his things which are laying on ground. Taehyung is amazed by universe so close to a window is standing a telescope. It was ridiculosly expensive but he wanted it so bad. On his nightstand is lamp in shape of Moon and glass of water. 

“Taetae.”

I gently pat his hair and Taehyung whined.

“Tae.”

I sing his name few times and he slowly opened his eyes. He smiled at me and hugged me around neck. 

“Breakfast time.”

I got up with Taehyung hanging around my neck like a little koala. I sat him down at kitchen table and prepared his usual breakfast - Cheerios with milk. Taehyung is eating and i pack my things. I am working on a new album and i need Yoongi’s help but it can wait, today we need to do grocery shopping. Taehyung got dressed in my loose jeans and grey hoodie. He doesn’t like tight clothes and especially socks. He put on sneakers and we left. Our flat is his safe shelter and streets mean big stress for him so he is playing with his necklace. We walked inside the supermarket and start to shop. We came to aisle with sweets where Taehyung always takes six pack of strawberry milk. Today our eyes fall on empty spot on shelf.

“Hyung ...”

Taehyung pointed on the empty shelf and looked at me. , this is beginning of big meltdown. Taehyung loves his routine, he needs it.

“Tae we will buy them in different shop.”

Taehyung frowned and started to tug on his hair.

“No! Here, we buy it here!”

He is yelling and started to kick in other things which are on the shelves. People around are looking at us and small voice inside of me is yelling on me to hit him. Why he has to do this?! He is embarrassing me in middle of a supermarket.

“Freak.”

“Disgusting.”

“Why do they go between normal people?”

People around are mumbling mean things and someone grabbed my shoulder. It is this supermarket’s security guard.

“Sir handle him or leave.”

I gulped and put our basket on ground. I grabbed Taehyung’s wrist and try to drag him outside. He is screaming and kicking around which caused that now really everyone is looking and pointing at us.

We are finally outside and i decided to carry him. I lifted him and run back to our apartment. We are inside and I leaded Taehyung in his room and in his calming corner. I laid him down on the blankets and see that he is already hurting his face with his nails. I lie down on top of him and holds his face between my hands.

“Shh Taehyung. Focus on my voice, okay? Hyung is here.”

I am so stupid for wanting to hit him. His life is so hard and difficult. I should have hit other people who were laughing. Taehyung’s heart is beating fast and he is finally calming down. I got up and took a small brush with soft bristles and took of his shoes. I caress his small feet in my hands and start to brush them. Taehyung is looking at me from half lifted eyelids and calmed down. He is breathing slower and stops crying. I smile at him and kissed his cheeks. Taehyung starts to on his thumb and I continue in brushing his feet until he fell asleep.