The Volcano Erupted.

Now, This is Twisted

A/N: Chapter song :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwCykGDEp7M&feature=related nothing else would've been fitting.

*Ring Ring*

"Yobosaeyo," Yuri answered reluctantly in a pained and tired voice.

"Ohh Yuri, I'm sorry about what happened. If only I was there with you right now.  I understand all of the pain you're going through, and… please, cheer up for me, okay, doll?" Yuna said as she was pleading for her best friend to calm down through the other line across the country. 

 

"I j-just don't understand what to feel.  All these…emotions, they're suddenly erupting like a volcano that's been dormant for at least a million years.  I'm alone, Yuna, I'm alone. My parents are gone! The parents that took care of me, their princess.  The parents that I rebelled against,  the parents that I disappointed so many times but still managed to love me.  The parents that I would give anything for just to have them back.  I, I took them for granted. You can't find a child lousier than me.  I'm broken.  I probably drove them to death in one way or another.  I regret everything, I… I'm not the same anymore. My life won’t be the same anymore. I have NO ONE!"

"You have me.  You have family. You have friends. You have people, SooYuri.  You have YOU.  Sure, your parents were a big part of your life.  But they're still here--watching you, guiding you. Take this as a chance to look at life in a different aspect, in a less greedy perspective so you can chose your actions wisely."

 

"God Damnit, Shut your mouth, Confucius.  I don't need your ing advice. I need my parents. I don't have anyone! My friends are all out partying their asses off, as expected, its not like they would give 2 s about what I’m feeling. My fat uncle and his illiterate children are  probably devouring up all of my parents' money right now! Where's my friend that knew how to shut after saying cheer up?! You know I'm living through hell right now, and you’ve never been through this type of thing before, so why should you tell me how to think?” 

 

"SooYuri, I, was just trying to h---"

 

"Screw this conversation. I'm done. Call me when you're done with your nagging." SooYuri retorted as she violently shut her phone and threw it on the ground.

 

The cold harsh tears shocked her as she felt them rolling rapidly along her dry, boiling skin.  She was astounded and couldn’t believe, no, couldn’t accept what her best friend, that used to be the only one she could truly confide in with all of heart and soul had to say about the serious matter.  

 

How dare she go about castigating me for something that she hasn’t even had a chance to experience!? 

 

The tears streaming out of her eyes only failed to cease until she realized that her spur-of-the-moment actions caused the one and only source of possible stability in her life to abandon her, and then they started flooding.

 

The phone rang the whole rest of the day.

 

But the worst one was that of a police officer’s.

“Annyeonghaseo. Is this the Lee residence?”

“Ne,” SooYuri answered.

“I assume you are the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Lee Jungho, am I correct?”

“Ne.”

“Miss, I am sorry to say that your parents are gone, and we suggest you come over to the sher-”

 

End.

 

And of course, the second to the worst one being the conversation with Yuna.

Both left SooYuri speechless, flooded with misery, derangement, resentment, indignity, and penitence. 

 She slapped herself many times, as if to wake herself up from the nightmare she was having. When she realized that didn't work, she broke down again.

Her emotions didn't even let her think clearly.  Nothing was processing in her brain as fast as it normally should've.  She hung up on the police so abruptly she didn't even know how her parents died.  At this point, she didn't want to know

 

SooYuri began reminiscing about her life,  remembering the parties, the boyfriends, the gossip, and the losers bowing to her feet; remembering how fun that was, how on-top-of-the-world that made her feel. She compared  those emotions to the ones she was feeling now:

Karma.  

What goes up must come down.  

The circle of life. 

All were sayings and phrases her parents lived by but she never followed. She didn’t want her life to be boring and rebelled against their teachings. 

If only I didn’t take things for granted. If only I weren’t so stupid and think of everything I had like it was nothing! 

 

Yuri found her eyes slowly shutting to sleep from exhaustion, when abruptly, the phone rang once more.

 

What now? Maybe its the devil calling me over to invite me into his house, she thought. 

 

“Talk.” She answered exasperatingly.

“SooYuri, its your aunt. Your uncle and I heard the news, and we’ve decided to take you into our house.  We’ll come over tomorrow to discuss what will happen to your parents’ house, but for now, pack your things and get ready. We’ll be there bright and early in the morning, and it’s already 1 AM, so you don’t have much time.”

She hung up, not bothering to converse with her aunt. She probably only agreed to take  Sooyuri in for the money.  

 

SooYuri sighed as she walked around her parents’ house, remembering again, all of her memories with his family this time, and taking all the picture fames and scrapbooks to pack.  

She gaped at her closet, at all her flamboyant shirts, pants, ostentatious minidresses, and hooker outfits. She groaned., deciding to leave all but 5 plain outfits at the house  in an effort to forget her past.

 

Yuri trudged over to her parent’s room and glanced at her Mom and Dad’s closets next, enveloping her head at the scent from the clothes of the ones she loved.  Before she could further ruin the pieces of clothing with her tears, she yanked one piece of clothing from each her mom’s and dad’s sides of the closet and packed it into her duffel bag.  

 

She stared at herself in the mirror of her parent’s closets. Her eyes were bloodshot with tear streaks visible on her cheeks. Her hair was no longer in it's glossy newly layered state, but a frizzy mess that looked like it hasn't been brushed for at least a month. Her eyes were getting puffier and puffier by the second and her dry lips were peeling.

 

Seeing herself in this lost fragile state made her lose all control, throwing things and crying herself to sleep on her parent's bed.

 

 

SooYuri looked at herself again weeks later at her aunt and uncle's restaurant restroom mirror.  She was forced to work there, to help out her family who "ever so kindly" took her in, and to try and make a quick buck by herself for the very first time.

  She looked better than she did the day her parents died, with semi brushed hair and clear eyes, but scary looking eye bags.  She desperately wanted to put some makeup on her face, but she had none.  All makeup and material objects were left at her old home, and there was no longer money for her to buy some. There was no money  for her to buy anything.

"SooYuri, where the hell are you?!? We have customers waiting!" screeched her aunt.

"I'll be there, auntie." she replied.

She dejectedly redid her workers' bun, fixed her greasy uniform, placed the rancid hat on her head, and planted a fake, borderline serial killer, overly cheery smile on her face.

 

Hehehe, If the thousand calorie cat burgers don't scare the customers away, maybe my smile will.

 

One final look in the mirror changed her mood from "get revenge from fat- family" back to the plain, miserable one she had been in for what felt like centuries.

 

 Not in a million years had Sooyuri ever imagined life like this.

She sighed while heading out of the restroom knowing that this life was hers no matter how many times she tried to push it away.

 

A/N: And, there it is. Hard work. id like to think it payed off. I really like this chapter. The first coauthored chapter of Now This is Twisted. :D did you guys like it? Veryy, angsty. Sorry if you didnt expect this.  The chapter basically wrote itself.

Thanks for reading :D

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Rini6189
#1
Chapter 10: That's understandable when you no longer have the drive to continue this story. It's normal for people to go through a phrase where they outgrow something. At least getting into K-Pop and fanfics is a good opportunity for you to do some exploring in the learning process. Having Ruki be there as support and guidance during that phase is a blessing for you to expand on your writing skill and broaden your horizon.

I haven't been on AFF for a long time when my interest drifted elsewhere and real life takes over to occupy my time. Now I'm dropping by to visit this site since I've missed it after a long absence. Through, there at come a time where I'd drift away from AFF and return later depending on where the feeling takes me.

If you do come back with new material to share with your readers and subscribers, it'll be something to look forward to. ..especially to see your growth as a writer.
Rini6189
#2
You're welcome! I'm glad to be of help, especially in giving constructive criticism when necessary. Since you mentioned in your author's note about accepting criticism that teaches you how to improve, I went all-out in my commenting. I don't have a problem with leaving comments since I'm openly expressive.<br />
<br />
Well, at least we get to understand Minho's character a little more better now. It's good that he hasn't completely changed after going through that transformation (just appearance-wise). He's still the same Minho inside but this time with a different life perspective and self-confidence. xD The so-called miracle of hormones causes confusion even among the brightest of minds regarding the matters of the heart. After all this time, the flame that he has for Yuri still hasn't died out. Being torn between the two girls must be troublesome for his male mind to take in. Then again, this could be just "a phase" like he said. Staying true to his heart can help him figure out the confusion. (Are you familiar with the song, "True To Your Heart?" That about explains it.) Rising to fame will be a challenging with plenty of obstacles along the way. The sentence in the end of this chapter makes him sound like the Minho we know in real life with a competitive streak. Now I'm anticipating Yuri and Yuna's encounter after they haven't spoken for a long time and the audition as well.
Rini6189
#3
I just couldn't help but spot these mistakes/typos because of my sharp eyes.<br />
<br />
Chapter 8 mistakes: <br />
<br />
1. I couldn’t help but to stare at her and her dramatic fashion sense at everyone chance I could, and she--she didn’t even say a word after that.<br />
* It's "every one chance."<br />
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2. If anyone were to help her, the best they could do is burst her bubble--get her out of the trap that every thing's fine.<br />
* It's "anyone was" and the other is "everything's fine." Since "everything" is another subject in this sentence, it's written as one word combined together. <br />
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3. But within a heavier note, I took a gander at the hallways, with busy body students traveling to their homeroom, and then found out, she was here today.<br />
* It's supposed to be "she is here" because the adverb "here" indicates present tense.<br />
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4. Sh scoffed.<br />
* "She" (I understand this mistake could've been made from typing fast.)<br />
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5. Jiyoung, on the other hand is a straight up play boy.<br />
Correction: Jiyoung, on the other hand, is a straight-up playboy.<br />
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6. Jiyoung slipped me an invite, which was in a black envelope with sticker of an apple on the flap and on the back, engraved in gold were the worlds “YOU’RE INVITED” in that little annoying capital letter font that literally stabs my eyes.<br />
Correction: Jiyoung slipped me an invite, which was in a black envelope with a sticker of an apple on the flap; and on the back, engraved in gold, were the words “YOU’RE INVITED” in that little annoying capital letter font that literally stabs my eyes.<br />
* Comma splicing<br />
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7. But then again, this also says I had some hometown competition...<br />
* It's "I have" since this sentence is written in present tense.<br />
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8. After more disrespectful jokes and erse laughter, the bell rung and it was time to disperse.<br />
* Past tense is "rang."<br />
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9. Just you wait, SM Choi Minho is coming to you guys soon.<br />
Correction: Just you wait, SM, Choi Minho is coming to you guys soon.<br />
* An extra comma is needed there since SM isn't a part of Minho's name.<br />
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Emperor_Kyungsoo
#4
Soooo daebak! 8D I'm only on chapter 5, but... im like... drawn in. 8D
crazyfreakygirly #5
Ooohhh supa dupa interesting!<br />
More updates please guys? ;D<br />
<3
wendyfrost
#6
THANKS FOR THE UPDATE YAYYYYYYYYYYY
Rini6189
#7
After seeing the title of this fic, it made me interested in finding out what the storyline will be about. I didn't expect to be so drawn into this story once I started reading it. The detailed descriptions help me clearly visualize in my mind about what's going on in the story. I like how in-depth you delve into the characters' thoughts and emotions. The angst is captured pretty well. Everything seems to be portrayed realistically. xD I couldn't help but think of Power Rangers when I see the title of the third chapter. Yuna's nickname for Minho is weird. After the tables have her, Yuri seems to have realized and begun to understand some things that weren't obvious to her before when she was still a "queenka." Change is what gets the two main characters, Yuri and Minho, to have a different outlook on life than the one they used to live by. It could be a good thing to build character. Minho seems to care for Yuri even though she didn't treat him fairly or take notice of him before. He's like the only hope she has left of thriving and forming a good potential friendship. I wonder if Yuna actually does miss Yuri after all that's happened even though Yuri seemed to have cut off ties with her after receiving a lecture from Yuna about taking the change as an opportunity to look at life differently. She seems hesitant in her speech as though she doesn't mean what she says. It couldn't be helped that time because Yuri was emotionally unstable from finding out that her parents had gone from her life forever. Still, a best friend can learn to forgive the other for his/her shortcomings.<br />
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I'm glad to have clicked onto this story's link. ^^ Now I'm looking forward to reading more.
Rini6189
#8
Chapter 7 mistakes (Part 2):<br />
<br />
6. In order to keep herself still sane, she yanked chords from her home phone in her room and took the battery out of her phone and flung it at the wall.<br />
* It should be "cords" instead of the "chords" that refers to music.<br />
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7. Trapped in her room for four days missing school calls for some time alone.<br />
Correction: She was trapped in her room for four days missing school calls for some time alone. <br />
* A subject is missing at the beginning of this sentence.<br />
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8. So that empty time was accompanied by reflection of her only companion, Minho.<br />
* The word "so" at the beginning of this sentence makes it a fragment (a dependent clause), and it should be excluded to make this a complete sentence.<br />
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9. And thinking of which stimulated her brain to start feeling remorseful.<br />
Correction: Thinking of that stimulated her brain to start feeling remorseful.<br />
* This looks like another sentence fragment beginning with a conjunction like "and."<br />
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10. Now, she thought, I have gone through the punishment and experienced some of the after-math. <br />
* "Aftermath" is one word alone without a hyphen.<br />
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11. It was then, when she had turned around, their eyes met.<br />
Correction: It was then, when she had turned around, that their eyes met.
Rini6189
#9
Chapter 7 mistakes:<br />
<br />
1. Joon and Yuri, or JuRi were the hottest couple on the campus. <br />
* An extra comma is needed after "JuRi" to separate it from the rest of the phrase since it serves as an interruption.<br />
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2. But Joon had commited such a horrible action, and with lots of pleading and begging, Yuri kindly took him back into her life as a close friend.<br />
Correction: Though, Joon had commited such a horrible action. With lots of pleading and begging, Yuri kindly took him back into her life as a close friend.<br />
* It's like a run-on with everything clumped together like that since the phrases refer to different subjects.<br />
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3. She thought Joon would be as thrilled to talk to her as she would him, but it turned out onto the contrary side.<br />
Correction: She thought Joon would be as thrilled to talk to her as she would to him, but it turned out on the contrary.<br />
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4. “She’s a ,” HyunSung said before jugging down a bottle of soju.”<br />
Correction: “She's a ,” HyunSung said before chugging down a bottle of soju.<br />
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5. After several more calls similar to the ones before, Sooyuri was on the vierge of tears.<br />
* It's spelled "verge." <br />
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Rini6189
#10
Chapter 6 mistakes:<br />
<br />
1. The confusion and dismay swimming in his mind was too much, it practically drowned his brain of thinking thoughts of only his trophy wife and how she had been demoted to Lady of the Trash.<br />
* Instead of putting the comma there to separate the two phrases, they could've been written as two separate sentences because it seems like a run-on here.<br />
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2. “Still think I’m hot, huh? Well, I’m glad your not tripping over me this time,” said Yuri with diva-like confidence.<br />
* It's "you're" instead of the possessive adjective "your."<br />
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3. "Yeah." He answered this question with hesitation, not daring to look into Yuri’s eyes; he was afraid if he had, he would give it away.<br />
Correction: "Yeah," he answered this question with hesitation, not daring to look into Yuri’s eyes. He was afraid that if he had, he would give it away.<br />
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4. “Waay prettier than you are” were words almost sliding out of Minho’s mouth, but biting his lip cautiously, he replied calmly, “Uh, I guess, but let me take my side of the questions.”<br />
Correction: “Waay prettier than you are” were the words almost sliding out of Minho’s mouth. Biting his lip cautiously, he replied calmly, “Uh, I guess, but let me take my side of the questions.”<br />
<br />
5. He didn’t want to jinx himself of being apart of the SM family, so he kept it low key, using his lie of working at a mall as his cover up.<br />
Correction: He didn’t want to jinx himself of being a part of the SM family, so he kept it low key by using his lie of working at a mall as his cover-up.<br />
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6. Minho grasped her hand firmly, causing Yuri to yelped in pain.<br />
* It should be in its stem form "yelp" since the preposition "to" is inserted before the verb to indicate the action.<br />
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7. I’m sure you’ll do fine though!<br />
* A comma is needed before the adverb "though."<br />
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8. We’ve only known each other for four days and your calling me names!<br />
* It's "you're."<br />
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