Taehyung

"Attention all passengers. Boarding has been completed. There is a mandatory lifeboat demonstration on the Eastern Deck. Please report to the deck immediately for life-saving information. Thank you."

Taehyung mimed mouth movements in time with the announcement. He'd heard it so many times that he was sure if he heard it just once more, he'd go inside. He was trying to find the Eastern Desk - he really was. The problem was that every hallway in the underbelly of the ship looked the same, and he felt like he was going around in circles trying to find his way to the correct place. It would have been just his luck if some prankster decided to reverse the direction of the arrow to send him the wrong way.

Unlikely, but possible regardless.

Taehyung eyed the arrows with suspicion as he passed, following the signs until he arrived at the outskirts of a swarm of men. They'd clustered around the overworked elevator. Taehyung was fairly sure there was another elevator elsewhere in the ship, but he hadn't thought to bring along his map, and he wasn't about to start backtracking now. Instead, he stood on the perimeter of the group and watched the numbers over the elevator doors light up as the elevator moved up and down its shaft.

"Kind of crazy, isn't it?" someone nearby asked. Taehyung blinked and looked to his right to find it was an older, portly western man who'd spoken. His hairline was receding, and he'd gone gray at the temples "I knew that there'd be a rush for the elevator doors, but I didn't think it would be this bad. There are five elevators working simultaneously, and it still isn't enough to deal with the traffic."

"Is this typical on a gay cruise?" Taehyung asked. He hesitated, then reframed his question "I mean, that there are so many guys. To be honest, I wasn't expecting there to be so many people. I thought it'd be more...niche."

The man laughed. He shook his head "I think this is my fourth time with this cruise line, and it's always like this. Or something like this, at least. I've never seen it this busy before. It must be because it's Spring Break. Usually I try to avoid the holiday crowds. I guess the silver lining is that it's lively in here with so many bodies bustling."

Lively was a good way to put it. It was only slightly inadequate. Taehyung looked over the crowd, then back to the man who'd started to talk him up "So, you're single?"

The man laughed again "No. I come here with my partner, Gary. We've had a lot of fun meeting new people and making new connections on cruises like these." 

Taehyung hesitated. He wasn't sure if what he'd heard was innocent, or if it was suggestive. He decided to play dumb "That's great. I guess there are a lot of professionals on cruises like these. Good friends, too."

"Plenty."

"Do you have any advice for a first timer?"

The man looked Taehyung over. The way he did it was polite, but Taehyung couldn't help but feel like he was being consumed. A shiver ran down his back. It wasn't exactly a good feeling, even though it was what he'd come here for.

"Advice." the man said "Let's see...hmm. Don't be afraid to be social. There are a lot of really great events that the crew organize, and everyone who goes to them is aiming to make new connections. If you participate, you're bound to meet someone you'll want to spend time with."

Taehyung nodded. It was good advice. He'd always been a fan of events - back in high school, he'd participated in almost all of them. Sports games, dances, charity raffles...everything but theater. He'd been too afraid back then of being seen as meek. To this day, close to a decade since he'd graduated, he was still in the closet. Coming on this cruise was a big step toward admitting who he really was.

"Some other advice that you need to keep to yourself." the man said, dropping his voice down to a whisper "Try to hit the buffet lines at odd hours. If you go during the lunch rush, it's going to be a madhouse. If you like the commotion and the companionship, then by all means, head over when it's marked lunch on the schedule, but if you'd like some peace and quiet, try to plan your visits avoiding peak hours."

"Got it." that was helpful.

"Also, make sure you listen to the safety instructions. Don't let any of those muscle jocks convince you to prove yourself by jumping overboard. You'll die on impact with the water. We're far up. Far up. And if, by some miracle, you did survive? You'd be left behind. No one would be able to find you, and the ocean would swallow you whole."

"So what I'm hearing is that learning about lifeboat safety is a damned good idea."

"It really is."

Taehyung glanced toward the elevator doors. The crowd was starting to thin. Four of the five doors had opened simultaneously, and a good number of the men waiting for a lift had packed themselves into the elevator. Taehyung was happy to wait for the next one. The doors closed, and the numbers over the door kept increasing. He approached the fifth elevator, moving with the rest of the crowd.

"I'm sure you'll have fun, though." the man who stood beside him said "There's a healthy mix here-all kinds of people to meet and talk to. Young and old, athletic and sedentary. I've always enjoyed myself." 

"Anything to avoid?"

"Now that's a loaded question." the man laughed "It depends on what you're looking to get out of your cruise. Are you here to make connections? To get drunk and relax around like-minded people? To have as much as you can?"

Taehyung wasn't sure he could answer that question. He floundered to find the truth. Deep down, he knew that he was here because he was tired of denying who he was, and he wanted to experience what life could be like with a man instead of a woman. He'd had enough female partners to know what to expect, but men? He'd never allowed himself to approach one. He'd always been too afraid.

What a better way to change that than on a gay cruise? The opportunity had fallen into his lap, and he'd taken it. No one needed to know where he was going, or what he was doing. His mother had told him to be safe and enjoy the sunshine. If only she knew.

Taehyung wasn't holding out for love. He knew that the chances of finding anything here were minimal, and even if he found someone he liked, their geographic distance would probably be the kiss of death for any potential relationship. He didn't mind. After his experience on the MS Pacifica, he'd go home with a greater understanding of who he was, and what he wanted from life.

Maybe, at last, he'd find someone he felt comfortable settling down with. He couldn't imagine doing that without knowing what it was like to be with a man. His attraction to the same had been something he'd carried with him his whole life, but never vocalized upon. Before he got serious with anyone, he had to know.

And he was going to find out. Just maybe not today. It was still early in the cruise, and he had time. He'd warm himself up to the idea first.

"I'm here to see what happens." Taehyung said at last. He felt it was a good answer.

Another laugh "Then I'd advise staying away from the pool and hot tub area after nine at night unless you know for sure what you want."

"Hot tub?" Taehyung almost stuttered "Really?"

"So far, every time I've been on this cruise, it's been the same."

He took in a slow breath to try to calm his nerves. The point of a gay cruise was to meet - and maybe romance - other gay men or couples. It promoted a tolerant environment where no one had to worry.

But something like that? Taehyung thought behavior like that was limited to .

He should have known.

"Okay, so, past nine in the evening, don't go to the pool and hot tubs. Anything else?" 

"Apart from that, I think there's nothing too big you need to watch out for. Every cruise is different, because the people on board are always different. Just go with the flow, observe, and let yourself enjoy."

"Okay." Taehyung nodded. He could definitely do that "Thanks."

"You're welcome." the elevator doors opened, and the man stepped in. There was no space for Taehyung - he'd have to take the next one "And if you're interested in meeting up again, you can find me in room C31. Happy cruising."

The door shut. Taehyung watched the numbers climb. He still wasn't sure if the man was being nice, or if he was coming onto him.

I'll have to make sure that I figure this out before I get a reputation for being oblivious. I feel like there's so much to learn... 

Another set of elevator doors opened. Taehyung fit in along with some of the other guests, and soon enough, the elevator was on its way up. He stood casually in place, hands clasped in front of him, as the elevator rose. In such a tight space, he was self-conscious of his broad shoulders and built frame. Being fit suited him just fine, but when he took up space in an already crammed location? It was a pain.

They reached the top floor. The elevator doors opened. Taehyung stepped out and looked around, amazed. Men of all shapes and sizes crowded the halls, and the roar of conversation was deafening. He did his best to stand off to the side, out of the way, but it was difficult to do when there were so many bodies occupying the same space. Traffic flowed in multiple directions, and Taehyung didn't know instinctively what way to go. There were too many people to read the directional signage on the walls. 

. At least, if I do get lost, I'll find myself in a quiet hall away from the chaos where I can read the directions on how to get to the Eastern Deck.

Taehyung looked up, then down the room and decided on a direction to go in. He took a breath, balled his fists, and went for it. Right or wrong, he'd find his way eventually. And if he was late for some of the lifeboat presentation? So what. It'd give him a chance to rub elbows with a guy or two while he asked for a review of what had happened before he arrived. 

Perfect.

Fate had brought him here, but Taehyung wasn't going to depend on it to see him through. He was in control of his own destiny now that he'd been given a nudge in the right direction, and he was going to make sure that he had a good time. This was his one chance to meet someone he could explore with without fear of rejection or slander. This was his shot, and he was going to take it. It was time to see all life had to offer.