you have never been to this part of the hospital before, so high up in the ward room levels in the main hospital building. you are never really needed to because more often than not, as an emergency trauma surgeon, once you have received and prepped your trauma patients, their cases will be transferred over to general surgery or other specialists for further treatment.

so why did yerim ask you to meet her up here?

her voice sounded urgent, too, but then again, her tone with you have always been rugged, and that is fine, you realise, now that you know who she really is. the welcoming chime of the elevator bell that rings once you've arrived at the designated suite ward rooms wakes you up in an instant from your thoughts.

the door slides away to reveal a massive hallway, the ceiling tall, and the carpet laid down the spotless tiles is soft to touch, making the whole floor stark different when compared to the regular wards a few floors down. you walk through the warmly lit hallway, passing the luxurious concierge (you never knew there is a different concierge service to cater to the vvip patients and their families) and then through the open lounge, heading to the biggest room in the whole hospital - the presidential suite.

there are guards outside of the suite, but when they spot you walking over, they immediately give way, opening the door to the suite for you with practiced ease.

you trot in, feeling a little anxious already.

yerim gives you a gentle smile when she notices your entrance, one that you have never quite seen her wear. she always had a teasing, quirky grin etched on her lips, but this time... this time it is different.

the two of you do not share a single word as your eyes drift away to the occupied bed in the ward room that is built similarly to a seven star hotel suite - genuine leather couches litter the separate living room partition, completed by a low, handcrafted mahogany table, the sofa set facing what you think is a small sized theatre screen in a separate section from the patient's bed itself, the room washed in a mellow lighting from the chandelier situated in the middle of the suite, shading yerim's face a little that you can't quite read what she is feeling as she leans back on the plush seat when you make your way to the electric medical bed.

kim saeron

that is the name printed on the patient's bed label.

you monitor the numbers flashing on the life support ventilator, blinking unsteadily as you take it all in.

"i, too, was a fool in love once."

at yerim's softly spoken words, you turn your attention away from the bed and the machines and the precious life slowly seeping away, focusing on the now provenly scarred young lady.

"i'm sure you can make some educated guesses on what happened," yerim chuckles a little before heaving a bated breath, sounding exhausted, another first for you to witness. "i wasn't as lucky as seulgi, or you, for that matter, when my enemies took the love of my life away. she was barely hanging on when we got to her... and then she never wakes up."

your fingers trace the white bedsheet, thinking, fearing. "how long?"

"she has been in a coma for a little over a year now."

"i'm sorry."

"me too," yerim whispers this, but because it is so quiet in the room, you could hear her loud and clear. "i'm really sorry, doc."

yerim means so much with so little spoken. she thinks it is her own fault that seulgi is unable to love you fully, and you vice versa, because your lover is bound to her duty as a protector more than she could offer you as a lover. in the midst of all this, you try to be brave for yerim and for seulgi, but it is far too easy to find yourself getting scared instead. "don't be."

"i don't know what to do."

you look at the electrical hospital bed and its occupant again, surrounded by some of the most advanced life support machines, with lines of fluid, oxygen and nutrients going in and out of her body, all of them keeping her life sustained at the very edge of a steep cliff, and you are trying to blink through some tears that are already gathering in your eyes. "neither do i."

-----

"hey, ," sooyoung pokes you on the dressing around your neck (far away from the actual wound, though) to snap you out of your daze. "what are you doing in the nurse's station? you should be resting instead. get out. go back to your room."

"yeah." you logged out of your account and shuffled out of the swiveling chair, watching sooyoung slip by and quickly planting her bottom on the same chair, already furiously typing away.

you had just pulled saeron's medical records, and you know too well that her situation is not very favourable. her brain is asleep, her muscles are close to non-functioning, and even if a miracle happens and she actually comes to, it would take years of physical and mental therapy alike for her to even walk again, and much more should she wish to speak. it will be a long road to recovery.

is saeron the reason why yerim bought this hospital? are yerim and saeron also the reason why seulgi is almost always lingering around the hospital? so she could be in the lookout for yerim's safety when she comes for a visit? (and you know yerim would try to visit her sleeping lover as much as she could, that is the sort of person she is)

speaking of seulgi, where is she?

you have not seen her since you wake up this morning, and she was not working security details for yerim either as the two guards stationed outside of the presidential ward suite are unfamiliar faces to you.

you actually start making your way back to your ward room when sooyoung pushes you away with the side of her hips and her eyes sporting a dangerous glare. sooyoung is sweet and caring as a friend, as she had been the one to receive you as a patient when seulgi drove you to the hospital, and she was quick to fuss all over you. she can also be rational when needed to be, proven by her track record in the months you've known her. but as a nurse, you are afraid sooyoung is the strict type, and you can't quite afford going against her orders, as she is fully capable of manhandling you and throwing you over her shoulder to carry you to your bed (you will not give her the satisfaction).

settling on your bed with a sigh, you wonder what would actually happen in the days coming. would you have constant supervision and security personnel assigned to you now that the secret is out? now that their enemies know seulgi has a weakness that could easily be exploited?

would she let go of your hand and end the relationship? would she be gone missing for months again to tie up every loose ends?

as you think of every possibilities, good and bad, you find yourself getting yet another shut eye, still feeling sleepy from your doses of painkillers.

-----

she is there sitting on a chair placed beside your bed when you come to, a small smile carved delicately on her lips. she scoops you up, gentle as ever, to a sitting position and sets the bed to support you too, pulling and pushing the levers under the bed (unlike the electrical medical bed in the presidential suite, yours is just a regular hydraulic bed), and then pressing her lips softly a little over your bruised jaw.

"yerim told me you met saeron." she says once she has retreated away from your split jaw and lips and slightly black eye.

"i did."

"yes, well," she moves her chair closer to your bed. "she was caught in an assassination attempt. they had been targeting yerim's car but when they crashed into the car, saeron was the only one inside, and not yerim. the incident killed the driver and one of the accompanying security personnel too."

"god." you mutter, eyebrows scrunching together.

"i was with yerim and her father when it all happened. that day is still fresh in my mind..." seulgi trails off, looking to your side, her eyes searching and finding the most obvious wound you have, the cut so close to your carotid artery in your neck. you know you are far too lucky to have made it out alive. "yerim griefed so bravely, then, perhaps she still is grieving now, but she won't last forever, and saeron too, will slip away the longer she is unconscious, won't she?"

the truth shall hurt, but seulgi probably already knows. "correct. her vitals aren't very good, and she's losing her muscles without use... unfortunately the life support machines can only do so much. if we were to, say, remove her ventilator, her lungs could easily collapse and she won't be able to breathe on her own."

when seulgi doesn't show a vivid change in the way she looks at you (with her heart and soul pouring out of her eyes in droves), you know she is aware of how utterly futile all the effort being done to keep yerim's lover alive actually is.

"what are you thinking about, seulgi?"

"you," she answers, quick and true, as always. "these days, it is mostly just you."

"i'm fine," you reach out for her hand and she moves to clasp on your fingers. her grip is tight, her palm is a little sweaty and you could feel some shivers or two. she is still scared. "haven't we spent all of last night holding and telling each other that i am alright?"

"that we did."

"so we did."

"but today, i still worry."

"and tomorrow?"

"and tomorrow," she pauses, before she allows a small smile to grace her face. "forever if you'll still have me."

"have you got a ring?"

"no, have you?"

"i don't have a ring."

"so we don't have a ring." she snorts softly.

you too, smile widely. "i don't think we would need one right about now."

"how do you feel about..." trailing off again, she loosens her grip on your hand, rubbing around your ring finger, perhaps to size you up. "how do you feel about me fashioning a ring out of my favourite pistol? it's the first gun that i got from the old man and i, uhm, i still service it regularly, but..."

"but you don't shoot it anymore." you complete her sentence for her, and she slowly nods.

"i don't shoot it anymore. i don't plan on ever shooting it again."

"are you allowed to not shoot your gun? because... that is like telling me i can't use my surgical knives when i try to perform a surgery."

"you know what, juhyun? i just find it so funny that you are so awkward with a kitchen knife when you are capable of using like, fifty sharper, deadlier surgical knives and other tools i am too scared to mention."

"shut up, seulgi."

letting out a light chuckle, seulgi shifts forward to give you another soft peck on the side of your lips, where the skin broke. "i got fired from my job, so i won't need the pistol anymore."

your eyebrows rise in complete shock, and you can't help but let out a loud gasp. "yerim fired you?"

"yeah."

"that, i-- should i talk some sense into her?"

"there is no need for that, my love," seulgi chuckles again, now intertwining your fingers together with hers again. "this is her being sensible, trust me, she knows what she's doing," she takes another pause, thinking. "however, there is talk to sell the hospital's stake."

"so no more ten year old owner?" you ask, giggling a little. you were in such a shock when you found out about it in a time that seems so long ago.

"no more ten year old owner."

"is yerim going to transfer saeron someplace else?"

"yes, but i don't know where. it's sensitive information and i'm not working with yerim anymore, so."

"right," you say, and that is the end of that. "what do you plan on doing now?"

"i don't know yet. i might just hold your hand for a while longer."

"feel free to do so."

"what about you? what do you plan on doing?"

you hum. "if there's going to be a change in the hospital's ownership and management... i think it's the perfect time to bow out."

"and then?"

"having my own clinic sounds grand, doesn't it?"

seulgi brightens up at the idea. "yes, you'd do so well."

"i just need to convince seungwan and sooyoung to come with me." you say this with an equally excited grin.

"tell you what," she says, b with confidence, before she leans in, going for another kiss, this time actually on your lips. her touch is unchanged, tender and warm. "i don't think they would need much convincing."

-----