I am sorry, if there are some mistakes <33 I am going to correct them later

“Joonmyun…why does Minseok hate me so much?”, Jongdae asked the other, who looked up at him. A baffled expression on his face, his eyes blown wide as his mouth hang slightly ajar. As if he was considering, if he had hear Jongdae right or not.

And then Jongdae looked at him with those big and sorrowful eyes…pain, puzzlement and sadness in them, Joonmyun knew that he had hear right and furrows his eyebrows as he tightly pressed his lips together.

A gloomy and hesitant expression forming on his face as he averted his eyes from the other’s glistening ones.

Now a week had passed since Jongdae and Minseok had gotten bonded to each other. Ever since then the smaller had been avoiding Minseok at all cost. Always clinging onto him, Amber, Yixing and Chanyeol.

It would have been cute and endearing, if he wouldn’t have done it to protect his life, which frustrated Joonmyun.

But he couldn’t blame the boy for doing it.

He himself would be acting like that, if his Zhaod* would want to kill him and would have already tried it twice. He himself would cling onto people, who would be trustworthy in his opinion, even though he wouldn’t even have known them for merely a month.

And considering the whole complexity of Jongdae’s situation, he could just imagine, how the boy must have been feeling that moment.

His grandfather had died…his last family member and also a good friend of Joonmyun and his family. Jongdae had lost everything, along with his friends and had, on top of that, landed in a new dimension on a totally strange planet.

And now he also needed to safe a world he knew nothing about and had also, as if it hadn’t already been enough, been married to a man that wanted to kill him.

Joonmyun’s heart clenched at those thoughts….at the thoughts of Jongdae’s helplessness, at the burden he was carrying now, at the pain and sadness he must still be feeling and at the pressure he was now put under…

It crushed his heart, because he only knew a little part of the boy’s feelings, since he had broken into his mind one time and had been able to catch a bit of his internal situation, and knew that this hasn’t been at least half the pain Jongdae was feeling.

And knowing that made his heart tighten even more….because Jongdae didn’t deserve this.

The smaller didn’t deserve to feel like that.

To feel such bad and devastating emotions. Let alone feel like that because of other people, who made him feel that lost and useless. Joonmyun looked up again and was met with those eyes again. With those glassy and irritated and hurt eyes and he felt his blood heating up and anger rising inside him, because he knew, who had caused that.

It awakened the urge inside him to punch or at least scream at Minseok for being such a cold-hearted and merciless person…

Otherwise…he could also understand his brother’s feelings, because he himself had felt like that at the beginning, too.

But that was a long time ago and after some time he had understood that their father’s and sister’s death hadn’t been Jongdae’s fault.

No.

It had been Kat’la’s fault, who was carrying Jat’ka’s evil soul inside him. And Jongdae had just bee the unlucky one, who was the reincarnation of the Amél‘ é Urmura.

But Jongdae hadn’t decided that himself. It just had happened to be him, because destiny had chosen him, before he even had the chance, to chose, if he even wanted to carry such a burden or not. Before he even had been born.

And before he then even had the time to prepare himself to fight…everything had been taken away from him.

His planet…his parents…and now also his grandfather and friends.

So Jongdae had lost more than he, his mother and brothers and Minseok. This had also been one of the reasons, why he stopped blaming Jongdae for what had happened.

Because he had realised that Jongdae had the biggest and worst loss that could have ever happened to a person.

And when he had first met Jongdae he had even regretted being angry at him, because he had seen how fragile and confused the smaller had been.

No wonder…Jongdae still was just a kid, a teenager, who had went through a lot.

He had been able to see that in the younger’s eyes.

They were filled with grief, puzzlement, pain and helplessness…, but also with something else.

Something like…like hope…

And beside that again something else.

Because hope implied strength and he saw that. He saw the strength in Jongdae, the will, the power and determination. And also the happiness and kindness, even though they were very faint evident back then in the smaller’s expression.

Yet, it succeeded to impress him.

It had impressed him a lot at how fast Jongdae had learnt, improved and how much he practised to get it even faster.

It warmed his hear to see the effort the younger made.

But it also hurt and worried him, because he knew that Jongdae still thought that it wasn’t enough, even though he even overworked himself sometimes.

Jongdae still thought that he was useless and unworthy, which made Joonmyun’s heart clench as the urge to hug the smaller tightly and let him cry out his soul grew constantly, because he shouldn’t feel that way.

Jongdae should feel happy and self-confident…

He should be smiling…

Joonmyun felt his heart skipping a beat as he thought of the other’s smile and he huffed inwardly at the inner tingly feeling he got.

But as soon as he felt that he froze as a shudder ran down his spine.

Instantly trying to push those feelings aside and he shook his head, because it was wrong to feel like that…

Jongdae wasn’t his bonded mate…wasn’t his destined mate…he was Minseok’s and it was a tabu to feel for and do something to a destined mate of another person…

“S-So….you don’t want to tell m-me?”, a voice suddenly stuttered and he snapped his head up.

Only to be met with a sad and upset look in Jongdae’s eyes and he immediately realised, what he had just done and shook his head another time as a soft chuckle left his mouth.

Trying to hid his nervousness.

“N-No…that’s not, what I meant with that”, he said and Jongdae’s ears perked up as he locked eye contact with Joonmyun. Hope shimmering in them as he stuttered “S-So you a-are going t-t- tell me?”, as he felt his body shivering from the tension inside it.

His muscles twitching and his heart beating erratically against his chest as he waited for Joonmyun to continue. Kind of anticipating the answer as he also feared it on the other hand.

Because he was afraid of what he was going to hear, of what Joonmyun was going to tell him….

What had he done that Minseok hated him so much, he asked himself as different scenarios flashed through his mind that made his breath hitch as his heart twisted from the emotional overload inside it.

Making his whole body tremor as he felt his head becoming hazy. But suddenly something grabbed him gently and ripped him out of his trance and he looked up at Joonmyun again, who was smiling warmly at him.

And even though, it was mixed with concern, it still was a gentle smile as he spoke up.

“I am going to tell you and I don’t know, how you are going to take it. So, are you sure that you really want to hear it?”, the taller asked and even though Jongdae’s insides churned, urging him to run away with his wobbly legs, he somehow nonetheless found enough courage and determination to nod his head slowly.

With that Joonmyun’s smile turned the slightest bit more concerned and he closed his eyes as he put his book aside and came closer to Jongdae on the couch in one of their huge living rooms in the castle.

He took in a deep breath, before he looked at Jongdae again with such a strong and meaningful look that it made Jongdae shudder, when Joonmyun cupped both of his hands.

“Before I am going to tell you this, I have to tell you that I don’t share the same opinion as Minseok does. Or at least I don’t share it anymore, because I realised, what a gorgeous and kind and caring person you are. I saw how much power and strength you have and I realised even more how much we need you and I think that even though Minseok still thinks like that now that he will change his opinion in the future, when he gets to know you better.

He is just…a bit complicated and he will need his time, because he never had it easy in the past.

It was many many years ago in our timeline, about a496 years ago, where he had been only 4 years old, like a normal human child. I cannot say, what age it is in your timeline, or if that age even exists. We just know that there are about 50 years difference between our dimensions and that our timeline vanishes at another pace as yours. SO I think that this age doesn’t even exist in your timeline.

So like I said, he was only 4 years old, not even one Gormorrian Quantrum old, since 50 years have to pass for that.

Minseok had just been a child and…he had many problems.

Because back then our mother got hurt during the war and we didn’t know, if she would survive it or not. It made Minseok furious, confused and emotionally very unstable, which was why his powers got out of control.

Everytime he got an emotional outburst and would cry out of frustration, out of anger and sadness, he would freeze everything around him. Even sharp icicles formed and flew aimlessly around the room and hurt and destroyed everything and everybody inside this room. It was because he blamed himself for being so weak and for not being able to help his mother and we didn’t know, how to calm him down.

Except for his older sister Himi…She somehow had always made it through him and succeeded to calm him. She had a special influence on him and helped him through a lot. She was his role model and taught him a lot, beside our mother. She always told him what was right or wrong and our mother, even though she was weak back then, also explained to him why and why and how he should behave.

But because she was too weak, she had pleaded his sister to teach him and to take care of him and Minseok had vowed to do his best and to be a good son and to do everything to save her, when he would be mature and strong enough.

That way our sister became his mentor and taught him, how to control his powers, how to fight, how to read people and how to find out their weaknesses. She became even more than just a sister to him. She became a very close friend, a mentor and a kind of heroine in his eyes too.

But he also needed it back then, because in our fourth Quantrum, in your timeline when we are about 200 years old, we are in the most unstable and most powerful stage in our development. In this time we have the biggest amount of power, but don’t know how to handle it and if you don’t have mentor to help you through it, it can consume you and drive you mad. It makes you crazy until you destroy everything around you.

And that time had been hell for Minseok, because he had been bullied due his body. He had been a bit chubby back then and got insulted for his outer appearance with words like ‘weak’, ‘ugly’ and ‘useless’.

He had endured it for a very long time until one day he had had enough and froze up the whole education building with everything and everybody inside it. But it didn’t stop there, the ice spread and he ravaged the outer environment and as he began to scream also a snowstorm appeared, destroying everything in its way.

We tried to stop him, but failed…

But then Himi suddenly flew towards him and hugged him tightly as she whispered something into his ears…and then, it suddenly stopped. All the snow and ice was suddenly gone and Minseok collapsed in our sister’s arms, crying his whole soul out.

That day had been the break through for him and after that he finally had been able to control his powers again and got emotionally stable. He developed and grew. In a good way.

He became a fine and nice Prince, always smiling and doing his very best. But he was also strict and disciplined, always being honest with others and saying his opinion about everything. He was practically blooming.

Yet…there still had been one thing that worried him and that was our Queen. She still had been weak and sick and only got weaker and weaker and even though he tried his best and hired every healer he could find…but it was useless. They couldn’t do anything and it only made our mother’s suffering to her death more painful.

But he refused to give up and was determined to find a way to heal her, even if he would have to sacrifice something.

And then, the next day, she was suddenly healed. Just like that, out of nowhere.

We also knew that father had last been there, which was why Minseok instantly wanted to know, how it was possible. But father had only patted his head and had looked at all of us…with…with this look in his eyes. That look that wanted to tell us something, but we didn’t understand and last did Minseok.

And all he just said ‘You will find it out one day. There are things you cannot predict and things you cannot influence. Like your destiny. You can try to flee from it, but it will come and all you can do is to face and to do the best with it. Therefore let me tell you, all I did was, because I had to and everything that will happen in the future is predicted by destiny.’

Back then I didn’t quite understood, what he meant, but now I think I can.

Our father had time influence as power and could also get visions, which could change from time to time. Visions of the future, the present and even the past. And I think that he had seen something and that this look should have prepared us for what was going to come in the future…

We, though, didn’t and I don’t know, what Minseok had thought back then, but ever since then father had been like a hero to him and he tried everything to be like him. I think that he knew that father wanted to tell us something, but he didn’t understand, what and since he always said that he wanted to be like father one day, I think that he thought, that if he would became like father that he would then understand his message.

That he would then understand and also be as strong, powerful, strict and wise, but still calm and gentle as father had been.

So he began to train harder and also learned more than he already did until he became even stronger than me, which was quite intimidating, since back then he had been the youngest out of all of us. It was before Sehun and Jongin were even born.

He improved his skills really fast and became very strong and powerful. But also calm, collected and honest, which our mother taught him. She showed him the beauty of life, the beauty that was hidden even in the most ugly parts and of course he took it to heart. Practically everything in we were teaching him, because he always had one aim.

To be like our father one day.

But along the road he got lost…

And that was the time you were born, known as our saviour and his destined mate, because he didn’t understand, why exactly you were his destined mate, just because destiny said it. To explain it to you. ‘Destiny’ is like a part of our subconsciousness, a higher and unexplainable part that had been integrated into us since time beginning. We don’t know how it really works…it is just there and it tells us things and visions. Some are collective, some are individual like our destined mate.

And it differs form everybody person to person. Some get to know their mate when they are still very young. Others get to know them, when they are like forty, in your time line, years old or something like that.

So ‘destiny’ is a subconscious part of ourself that sometimes leads us to somewhere and shows us different things. But mostly shows us our destined mates, it is rare that it does something more, except it is really important, like the return of you.

Back to Minseok, then. Like I said, he didn’t really understand, why he was chosen and when he asked, everybody just told him that it had to do something with the legend and that it wasn’t without reason that a certain person became your destined mate. So he was kind of forced to accept it at the beginning, but got used yo it pretty quickly.

Because when you get to know your destined mate, you become bounded spiritually bounded. Almost like you are one person. You can sense the other’s feelings and can connect with the other’s powers. Yet, some thing are only partially possible, like mind-reading. You can still only read the other’s min, if he lets you, same with the powers.

The feelings and senses, though, can you not influence or push aside. This is the only unavoidable part in this bond.

And, like I said, as soon as Minseok had gotten used to it, Carpricra was attacked and he had been able to sense your fear and instantly flew over there with battle ships and all kinds of squadrons. He felt the need to protect you, but also to save father and sister, who had been on your planet back then.

It was too late, though, and Carpricra was already turning black after Kat’la’s first attack. The beauteous surface turned black, everything turning into ashes. It shocked us and made us beyond furious, so we began to fight back. Fiercely.

Minseok also tried to reach his father’s mind and also succeeded…but was too late again and father contacted all of us, before Minseok even had the chance to speak up…

I still can feel the pain and the sadness that had run through me that moment, when he said those words…

‘I am sorry, my beloved ones. But I have to do, what I have to do. I do it for a reason, always remember that. I have to protect the Amél‘ é Urmura . I am sorry, I love you. Las’shamla*.’

And then we hear a big explosion and after that dreadful silence in our heads.

But the next moment we heard Minseok screaming…screaming, because he had watched how our father’s Jailon* had gotten destroyed…right in front of his eyes.

Yet, what was even more shocking, was that his battle ship wasn’t enough and that some of the laser bombs had still reached the planet…and knowing Kat’la’s ultimate weapon, we assumed the worst. Which means that you wouldn’t make it and die there, if we wouldn’t act fast.

We were all very shocked…but also angry beyond imagination. We were furious that we had last our father, a great kind…and were losing a whole planet, with families and friends fro us and our allies on it.

Because we could feel and see how Carpricra and the people on it were dying…the planet practically turning black and red…it was near exploding.

It made us raging, our allies raging… and we fought, we fought more aggressive than we had ever fought before.

Albeit, Minseok overdid it.

He got carried away by his anger and shut everything around him out. He completely forgot, where he was and who he was. It was frightening, because in this state he was, and still is, the most unpredictable and vulnerable.

Kat’la of course used that and attacked him. And when he realised it, it was already too late and he thought that he was going to die.

But our sister shielded him and her fighter got damaged very badly and with another hit she was thrown over to Carpricra…right in front of Minseok’s eyes.

And she only succeeded to tell us a good bye and that she loved us, before the planet suddenly exploded…disappearing in a matter of seconds. And with its disappearance also our sister disappeared.

We were frozen after that…

Shock and realisation hitting us like a slap in the face, because we didn’t want to believe that Carpricra was gone. It was simply beyond our imagination and yet, the evidence had been right there in front of our eyes. Just black space. The planet gone, the people gone, our hope…gone, the Amél‘ é Urmura…just gone…

It was so surreal and yet the ugly truth.

So that shock soon turned into fury and we fought again. We also had luck, because then more of our allies arrived and Kat’la was forced to turn around and flee.

That day had been the darkest in our whole history.

Ever since then also Minseok hadn’t been the same anymore. He became bitter, cold and merciless. He built walls up around himself and hid his emotions away. Replacing them by apathy, anger, hatred and unforgivingness…and all those emotion addressed towards Kat’la…but mostly you.”

Jongdae jerked at that. The lump in his throat growing as his body became jittery. His muscles and heart aching, his head hurting from all the images and emotions that were running through him. Making him choke on his own breath as just one question plopped up in his head, pishing all the others aside…

“Why?”, he asked himself as his eyes became teary, when he exhaled shakily.

Why him?…He hadn’t done anything.

His hear tightened and he hiccuped, when the tears left his eyes as he tried to press the question out.

Yet, he didn’t have to do so, because Joonmyun could already see and sense, what he was thinking and so he squeezed the smaller’s hands with his bigger one as he his left cheek gently.

“I don’t think like him, not anymore. But he still blames you for losing them. He…He blames you and your past life for not defeating Jat’ka. Because if Amél would have done that, he thinks that our father and sister would still be alive… That’s what he had told me.

He doesn’t understand how you weren’t able to defeat him in your past life with and how you weren’t able to protect your, our, world back then. Or he doesn’t blame you, but rather the soul and powers of Amél, but for him it is the same, since you are his reincarnation.

Minseok also didn’t, and still doesn’t understand, why your life was more important and worthy than our father’s one, only because you are the so called saviour, who failed in his opinion, since you had disappeared even after our father’s death.

Another time.

So…he thought, that you should have died instead, since you could have easily been reborn and that this way our father and sister would have still been alive.

With other words…, he wished that you would have died, without father having to protect you.

And now that you are back, he wants revenge.

Same for his sister, even though it was his own god damn fault that she died, but he doesn’t want to realise it. But the moment she died you were long gone…

But that doesn’t matter to him and he still blames you for it. He blames you for his emotional state back then, too. He had said, that if father wouldn’t have died to save you, that he wouldn’t have been so outraged and would have gone mad and would maybe have been able to protect him himself instead of Mihi.

And to be honest…I thought like that too at the beginning.

Now, however, I am ashamed that I have even let something this stupid settle in my mind back then, due my emotional unstable state. Due my grief, my sadness and also my pain.

I also blames you…but one time I drifted off into my thoughts and began asking myself, why I even blamed you. Only to find myself realising that he reasons were total bull and completely unlogical and that I had been such a fool for thinking it.

I realised that even though you had this power…that you wouldn’t have been able to do anything, because you had just been too young. You had been only three ears old, a child…and on top of that does a crystal not fuse with its porter until the porter becomes mature.

That was the second point that made me feel ashamed thinking of you that way…

But what made me want to slap myself, was when I realised that….that you didn’t even had a choice. You couldn’t chose, if you wanted to be the saviour or not. You couldn’t chose either to be born with this destiny and power or not. You weren’t able to decide anything of that and now you are in the same situation again.

This is why I vowed to myself to help you, when I first saw you.

I regretted everything I have thought 650 years ago, when I had realised my mistake back then. And I rued it even more, when I saw the anxiety and the confusion in your eyes. I saw hoe fearful you were and it just made me realise my mistakes even more, which is why I want to help you.

Which is why I vowed to protect you.

Because you are such an adoring, strong, enduring, helpful, open, lovingly, beautiful and amazing person, who doesn’t deserve such harsh treatment. No matter, what the reason of the person might be. No matter, if I comprehend it or not. No matter if it is a rebel, an enemy, a friend or even family, I will fight against them.

I will protect you with everything that I have.

Because we need you.

We depend on you.

Without you our universe wouldn’t even stand a chance of winning and surviving this war.

And I will make sure that other people see it too. See the beautiful and strong Jongdae I see. See the hero, the Amél‘ é Urmura, the saviour, the wonderful last Carprian I see.

I will make them see it.

Even Minseok”, he whispered and dried Jongdae’s still falling tears as he gave the younger a tender smile.

Making Jongdae’s heartbeat fasten up, a warm tingly sensation spreading through his body as he felt himself relaxing and almost leaning into the other’s touch. Leaning into the other’s cooling touch that made a calm sensation radiate through his stomach.

And when he looked in the other’s eyes, he felt himself blushing slightly. Because the other was still smiling, his eyes still shining brightly and warmly at him. With such fondness, amazement and admiration visible in them that it made Jongdae’s heart spring.

Receiving the warmness and geniality that was coming from them and that made him feel comfortable and…safe.

Jongdae wanted to get completely lost in those feelings…in those sensations that made him feel so good…

But something inside him fought it.

Fought against those feelings and pushed his positive thoughts aside.

Telling him that it was wrong thinking like that about the other.

That it was more than wrong…almost illegal.

And even though he tried to push that feeling aside, he couldn’t.

It kept crossing his heart, his mind, his body. Filling him completely as it practically kept shouting “Wrong!” at him, while pictures of Minseok plopped up in his mind.

But that only confused him…it confused him only more, because he couldn’t understand, why he felt so wrong about the way he felt about Joonmyun.

He couldn’t understand, why it was so wrong and why those two sides inside him fought against each other.

And why one side pictured Minseok…, when he didn’t even feel something for the boy…

Or did he?…

He began to shake again, his heart clenching in despair, because his confusion only grew as his internal fight escalated with every passing second.

Making him feel only more lost and bewildered than he had already felt..

And the fact that his feelings for Joonmyun felt so wrong with Minseok’s face constantly showing up in front of his eyes certainly didn’t help him.

Yet, before he sunk any further into his hazy state, a loud explosion resonated through the room’s walls. Making the ground, everything around them tremor and he snapped our of his daze.

Looking around in panic as another explosion occurred that made the glass explode as a bright light shone through the windows.

But instead of fleeing, he just remained frozen in his spot. Staring outside the windows, where the universal sky turned, yellow, red, dark blue and even totally black…something that seemed familiar to him…

So he stayed, shocked and mesmerized by what just had happened.

Yet, he didn’t have the time to stay in this position, when he felt something grabbing him suddenly and carrying him bridal style out of the room.

That also was the moment he heard Joonmyun scream “We’re under attack! Launch all battle stations! All the Jailon* fighters to their battle ships!”, which ripped him out of his daze and he shivered in fear as he realised that….that they were going to fight another dreadful battle…and that he was useless…again.

And yet, something felt very odd and fearful about that situation, but he couldn’t tell, what it was…

*Zhaod= husband

*Las'shamla= Good bye

*Jailon= a jet space fighter