Adoration

Reticence (Silence)
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On Monday, Kyungsoo boarded a train with Chanyeol and left Tokyo for Matsumoto, a city in the Nagano prefecture about three hours away by railway from where Chanyeol lived.

 

The city of Matsumoto was Takeda’s hometown and every year in the summer, Takeda would return to his hometown to run a Go summer festival of some sorts. This year, Chanyeol had decided to come along with Kyungsoo in tow.

Kyungsoo still knew jack about Go but he enjoyed the overseas vacation and getting to be around Chanyeol, whom he didn’t get to see very often anymore. Especially because it was already Monday and Kyungsoo’s flight back home to Seoul was on Saturday. There were about four to five days in between, depending on how one would count it, and Kyungsoo dreaded the day to come.

Sure, Kyungsoo had a few friends and family back in his country, but he was still deciding on what the meaning of “home” really meant. Kyungsoo found his “home” in Chanyeol, but Chanyeol wasn’t there in the literal home that Kyungsoo always thought to be his.

 

Come the next Monday, Kyungsoo would be back at work and he wasn’t sure whether that was what he wanted after all. Kyungsoo had tried and worked so hard to be where he was at today, but he was left feeling incomplete and empty now.

Kyungsoo always believed that if he worked hard and persevered, he would be successful and thus happy. Kyungsoo did all of that but at almost thirty years old, Kyungsoo started to realize that he was much happier here with Chanyeol, even in a foreign land where he didn’t speak nor understand the language.

Despite the alienness of everything that was currently around and surrounding him, Kyungsoo felt very much at home and he didn’t want to leave.

 

 

 

The annual Go festival took place in the Matsumoto city hall, situated in the heart of the small city. Among the features of the festival was Go matches between the participants, exhibition booths, educational talks on Go and the appearance of renowned Go players.

Takeda helped organize the festival for the past few years on behalf of his city’s municipal council, as he was one of the few professional Go players who came from Matsumoto too.

This year, for the first time since Takeda had become Chanyeol’s assistant, Chanyeol followed Takeda back to Matsumoto to help him organize and run the Go festival.

Takeda didn’t question it but it was certainly unlike of Chanyeol to suddenly come up and offer his assistance. Chanyeol hadn’t been like that, not since the accident five years ago. Takeda only suspected that Kyungsoo’s influence might have a part to do in it.

 

 

On the first day of the festival, the locals who decided to take part would play in Go matches against each other while a professional player would come to their tables and advise them on their moves and strategies.

Those who didn’t want to take part in matches could attend lectures by another Go professional. In the afternoon, the professional and advanced Go players would set up booths and those willing to challenge them could come up and take part in a match against the more seasoned player.

 

The multi-purpose hall within the city hall building that was used for various events such as weddings to sports matches was now converted for the Go festival. The hall was a common feature like every other one in the country with high ceilings, very bright lighting, various entrances, squeaky linoleum floors and a stage up front.

Individual booths with a chair and table were set up in the hall with about eight advanced to professional level Go players for the attendees to try a match against. There was a moderately sized crowd in the hall who were gathered around each booth to wait their turn and watch the ongoing match versus the professional player.

Due to the number of people that wished to challenge a professional Go player, the match would be timed with a game clock and each participant would only receive ten seconds during their turn. Due to the fast pace, it was also known as fast Go that was only played in the festival or non-formal casual settings.

 

There were also Go players from overseas and some from the rival Kansai Go association there, who was there in the spirit of sports to volunteer at the festival. Personally, some of the members of both associations are also friends with each other.

Takeda’s booth was the last one in the row and located towards the end of the hall near the main entrance, while Chanyeol’s booth was just beside him. But beside Chanyeol’s booth was his longtime and number one rival who had defeated and claimed the national Go title from him- Maruyama.

The players sat on a foldable steel chair near a table with a Go board and a game clock on it. A name card was printed and hung on the table to identify which one of the Go players it was.

Although the booths were decently spaced apart, it was still close enough for the players sitting there to talk to each other.

 

 

Most of the crowd in the hall were focused on one particular booth in the hall, which was that of a young Go player who was his in early twenties and had recently won some lower professional tournament, who was also somewhat popular for his good looks.

A local man had challenged the player to a match and was doing decently well against the professional, effectively gathering a large crowd to surround and watch the match. The other booths were sparsely populated but most of the professional Go players present there were engaged in a friendly match.

Takeda had been bored waiting for someone to come up and challenge him before the lunch break. When no one else came up, Takeda was about to start some small talk with Chanyeol in the booth beside him when a polite young girl of about schooling age came up with a friend to challenge Takeda.

Takeda apologized for having to cut short his conversation with Chanyeol, who smiled back and said that it was no problem.

Seeing that Takeda was occupied and that he had nothing to do yet, Chanyeol turned to his other side and saw Maruyama looking back at him with his cheek resting on his palm with his arm perched on the table top.

Chanyeol’s eyes met Maruyama by accident and he honestly did not know what to do from there, especially considering how Maruyama was fully focused on him. It felt a bit like their previous match where Maruyama wouldn’t stop glaring at Chanyeol from the opposite side of the board.

Chanyeol faked a soft smile and was about to look to the floor when Maruyama spoke up.

 

 

“I haven’t seen you since the last tournament. You just left and didn’t stay for the reception or post-match review afterward too. So, you do this every year?” Maruyama asked, initiating the conversation.

“Not really,” Chanyeol replied, lightly shaking his head.

“I see. It’s my first time volunteering too,” Maruyama continued, pulling his chair just a bit closer, “So what are you doing here?”

“I’m here with Takeda,” Chanyeol answered, pointing to Takeda at the booth on his other side.

“Oh right. I forgot that he’s your assistant too,” Maruyama nodded in acknowledgment, folding his arms over his chest at the same time.

Chanyeol nodded back but it came off more like a bow.

“So, you must have heard about it by now have you?” Maruyama hinted, now sitting sideways on his chair to fully face Chanyeol.

“-heard about what?” Chanyeol inquired, not having a clue at what Maruyama was talking about.

Maruyama dryly chuckled before resting his arm back on the booth’s table, “Didn’t you hear that I lost the senior professionals match last week against the top Go player in the country? I thought that you would have known or someone in the association would’ve told you since they’re very diligent about tracking player’s records. After all, I did defeat you the last time.”

“I see,” Chanyeol responded, “I know the match was going to take place shortly after our tournament but I wasn’t following it because I was busy preparing for another tournament.”

“Why haven’t you tried competing in the senior professionals' match yet?” Maruyama questioned, “How old are you anyway?”

“I’ll turn thirty this November. I’m not confident enough yet to play Go against people who are almost twice as old as me. With their age also comes their massive experience. It says a lot that the top Go player is usually always middle-aged. I don’t think I’m at that level yet,” Chanyeol honestly answered, lowering his head and gaze. 

Maruyama chuckled, “You really are humble, aren’t you? I told myself that if I could beat you, then I would be able to win the senior professionals match too. It turns out that I was wrong. I lost in the quarter-finals. I thought I would be able to do better than that and be a finalist, to be honest.”

“You win some, you lose some. It’s how Go is,” Chanyeol added.

“I guess so,” Maruyama muttered, “That’s why I’m here, actually. I was aiming too high than what I was capable of.  I thought that I should learn a thing or two from that.”

“Good for you. Thanks for your honesty,” Chanyeol returned before getting up from his seat, leaving his booth and walking over to Maruyama’s booth.

 

Chanyeol sat himself down on the chair opposite from Maruyama at the table, with the table and the Go board on it in between them. Maruyama’s mouth was slightly open as he saw Chanyeol move to near him, not knowing what Chanyeol’s intention was.

Chanyeol bowed his head and the upper half of his body politely, “Since we’re not doing anything now, will you play a fast Go match against me? I believe that we can both greatly learn from each other if we do.”

Maruyama laughed, trying to stifle his laughter, “Sure. I just didn’t think that you would ever want to.”

 

It didn’t take long before Maruyama and Chanyeol’s match attracted most of the crowd who were previously occupied with the young good looking junior professional's match, who couldn’t say he was disappointed by it either because he looked up to Maruyama and Chanyeol too as players.

After all, anyone who cared the least bit about Go, wouldn’t miss the opportunity to watch two famous professional play a match against each other even in a casual non-competitive setting.

Takeda did sigh and shake his head, even though it defeated the purpose of the whole exhibition of having regular people play versus professionals, and certainly not two professionals against each other.

 

 

When Chanyeol had lost against Maruyama in the title match previously, Chanyeol had begun to see Maruyama as a formidable mountain that was much higher than him and one that he wasn’t able to cross over yet.

Chanyeol grew determined to overcome that mountain and hopefully win the next time he was pitted against Maruyama. Since then, Chanyeol had been training, practicing and learning in how to better himself but failed to realize that even mountains crumble.

For once, Chanyeol found himself relating to the feelings and experiences of his opponent who had triumphed against him.

While it may have been vague before, it was all clear to Chanyeol now, that the best thing he should be doing

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Comments

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Djatasma
#1
Chapter 19: This was wonderful
alanahanin #2
Chapter 19: This story is amazing! So touchful for me that i'm going to cry
Reem_mohamed
#3
Chapter 19: ???
ozomana
#4
Chapter 19: It is a beautiful story
Reem_mohamed
#5
Chapter 14: The journey of realizing a certain emotion is very stressful and can take a lifetime to understand
Reem_mohamed
#6
Chapter 2: Ahh ,again I didn't expect that kind of accident happened to chanyeol
Reem_mohamed
#7
Chapter 1: At the point where kyungsoo forgot about chanyeol ,my heart broke into pieces cause I didn't expect that
ASYSSJ
#8
Chapter 14: damn.... i keep rereading this story over and over again...
ASYSSJ
#9
Chapter 19: Ouhhhhh so sweet!!
thank you for the story i really love it:)))
XOXO<333
ASYSSJ
#10
Chapter 5: U... wa...ah...
DAMN IT!! WHO'S CUTTING THE ONION T^T