Youngjae swore that if he wasn’t hungover, Jaebum would have never gotten the pass. He blamed his tiredness for the reason he lay there motionless. But his silence was taken for granted. Jaebum kissed his forehead without another thought. Those lips carried no hesitation. Youngjae was scared of that. He was scared of how firm Jaebum turned out to be. Deep within himself, Youngjae knew Jaebum wasn’t joking around.

But what was the point?

What was the point of being an in the beginning? What was the point of denying whatever happened between them? Their lips touched a lot more times than they should have, yet Jaebum denied everything. What was the point of all that? If they had just accepted from the start, then…

No, Youngjae can’t think like this right now. He had to focus on the reality that there was no way they could be together. Their worlds never collided. Jaebum was living among the people while Youngjae lived as one of those people. They don’t have a future together.

Youngjae hated that out of all the seven billion people on this planet, he had to feel a pull towards Im Jaebum. Part of him knew they were connected somehow. Another part of him stubbornly remained closed off to the truth. At this point, Youngjae gave up trying to pry through his memories. Maybe some things were better off not to be remembered. Maybe the stubborn part of himself wanted to protect him.

But these days…

Every time Youngjae closed his eyes, he saw a boy who owned a smile as sweet as sugar and as warm as the sunlight on a beautiful summer morning.

No face.

A uniform.

And an affectionate smile that melted Youngjae’s heart.

<||><||><||><||><||>

What Young Master Choi failed to predict was how his very special guest managed to schedule the same flight as him. Nami must have leaked his flight information. Standing at the gates of his mansion, the young master wanted to flag down a cab and disappear first. The two weeks finally came to an end. The last couple days, the idol got more schedules and became busy. Youngjae was glad. He didn’t want to face Jaebum anymore than he had to. They didn’t hear from each other, so Youngjae assumed that Jaebum had already flown back to Seoul. Youngjae’s mistake. He shouldn’t have assumed.

The driver loaded the young master’s luggage while a guard opened the door for him. The moment his touched the seat, Youngjae ordered the driver to take off. Young Master Choi had bid his goodbyes to his maids. There was no need to wait around any longer. No way was he going to ride in the same car as Jaebum. Besides, Jaebum’s management can take care of that. If he could get to the airport fast enough, he could have the tickets changed to Economy. Jaebum definitely would be in First Class.

Youngjae thought he could close his eyes for a bit until his phone began ringing. “Hello?” He picked up without looking at the caller ID.

“Turn back around! Why did you leave me?” Jaebum shouted through the line. “You agreed to wait for me!”

“Agreement wasn’t signed in a written contract. Bye,” Youngjae hung up before Jaebum could squeeze in another word. Not a second later, the phone went off again. Youngjae didn’t answer. Calls kept coming in constantly for about five minutes until the lawyer lost his mind and turned off the phone. He shoved the device in his backpack. This was getting ridiculous.

For the rest of the ride to the airport, it was the longing peace that had never existed for the past two weeks. Though Youngjae could barely relax. His insides churned up and down throughout the ride. Hated to admit it but Jaebum had been making him more nervous lately. Youngjae thought whatever spark he had felt for the idol had already disappeared from his life. Yet, here he was, fighting with his own demons to keep Im Jaebum out of his mind.

As soon as the young master reached the airport, he dragged his luggage and himself to the ticket station and requested a change. Lucky for him, the Economy had exactly one seat left. Finally feeling his heart calm down, Youngjae proceeded to the boarding gate. He stopped by a coffee shop to grab a coffee while constantly glancing over his shoulder. For sure that it was impossible for Jaebum to catch up, Youngjae relaxed and enjoyed his coffee. After a couple of minutes of just staring out the windows and sipping on his hot coffee, the lawyer pulled out a book and began reading.

The story picked up its pace and Youngjae found himself drawn into every word on the page. Time ticked by quickly without the lawyer’s notice. Soon, it was time to board. Youngjae bookmarked his book and gathered his things. In haste, the nearly empty coffee cup almost fell and knocked all the remaining coffee over the floor. A man next to the oblivious lawyer acted fast and saved the cup. Slightly embarrassed by his carelessness, Youngjae thanked his neighbor before throwing the cup away. The boarding process went smoothly. For the last time, Youngjae looked over his shoulder and smiled when he didn’t catch a familiar figure. The lawyer carried on with light steps into the plane.

Youngjae was more than happy to find out he had scored a window seat. After putting up his bags, he settled into his assigned seat with his book and phone. No other care for anything else, Youngjae continued his reading session. The book distracted him so much that he didn’t realize the plane was taking off until he felt the person next to him sway a bit. He glanced over with mild concern, hoping whoever he sat next to could handle themselves. But Youngjae recognized those hands anywhere.

Immediately, Youngjae shut his book close and looked up eye-to-eye with the person. “You-”

“Shhhh!” Jaebum put a finger over the mask. The idol pulled his cap lower.

Even though all Youngjae could see were Jaebum’s eyes, he knew Jaebum was smirking under that mask. “How-”

“I really didn’t appreciate how you treated me this morning.”

“Wha-”

“I’m your guest. Aren’t you supposed to maintain excellent hospitality ‘til the end?”

Youngjae rolled his eyes and turned away. “Why are you in Economy? Aren’t you supposed to be in First Class? It’s not safe.”

“Oh. Are you, perhaps, worried about me?” Jaebum didn’t even try to hide the excitement in his voice.

“No.”

“Well, anyways, I knew you were going to exchange tickets in the end. So, I booked Economy in the first place. Youngmi-noona scolded me for it, but it’s whatever. I’m here with you now. If anything, you can protect me.” The idol winked at his lawyer.

Lawyer Choi’s eyes bulged out of their sockets. “E-excuse me?!” Seeing that his reaction attracted a few unwanted attention, Youngjae apologized to his surroundings and went back to stare at his client in disbelief. “Protect you? I’m not your bodyguard.”

Jaebum shrugged, wiggling in his seat to make more comfort for his back. “You’re stuck with me now.”

“Why are you doing this? Why won’t you leave me alone?”

“Because you’re stubborn. Why can’t you just forgive me for what I’ve done and give me another chance? I really want to-”

“I’m tired. I’m going to sleep,” Youngjae said, turning his body to face the window. He didn’t hear anything after that. Just some rustling. Crossing his arms against his chest and closing his eyes, Youngjae could care less about the bothersome person right next to him. Surprisingly, it took a few minutes for the lawyer to start feeling himself drift into a peaceful nap. Before he completely passed out, Youngjae felt a warm blanket gently drape over him. He cursed under his breath as his heart skipped a beat.

<||><||><||><||><||>

Never did it cross Youngjae’s mind once that his day could get any worse. Before getting off the plane, for some reason, Jaebum insisted on carrying Youngjae’s bags. Too tired to put up a fight, Youngjae watched helplessly as Jaebum proceeded however the idol wanted. They exited the aircraft and headed towards the back entrance to avoid accidental crowds. The lawyer thought this would be a good time to stray away from the idol. Forget the luggage, Jaebum probably wouldn’t mess with it anyway. And so, Youngjae quietly took a different turn and headed down to the front entrance. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

Or so Lawyer Choi thought.

As soon as Youngjae’s two feet landed on the ground from the escalator, a sea of people filed against him. Confused and overwhelmed by the sudden rush, he struggled his way out of the crowd as the fans continued pushing in the opposite direction. Almost losing his jacket in the process, Youngjae called out loudly for people to let him through. Voices from all directions rang in his ears. For some reason, the fans mistook the unfortunate lawyer for their idol. But when they realized it was the wrong person, it was too late. The crowd became uncontrollable even with the security team closing in. Whatever was happening around Youngjae was too fast for him to comprehend in a calm manner. All he cared about was swimming across this tsunami of screaming fangirls and fanboys.

Halfway through the crowd, Youngjae heard the screaming intensify tenfold. Cupping both of his hands over his ears, he dashed through the sudden parting of the crowd. When he opened his eyes again, he was standing by himself just a couple of feet from the entrance. Youngjae turned back around, hands slowly dropping to his sides, eyes came in contact with the famous idol descending from the escalator.

“…” Youngjae breathed out shakily. He just caused trouble for not only himself but Jaebum as well.

More security guards ran to control the crazy crowd as the idol stood still at the bottom of the escalator. The idol’s management team stood in position around him. They didn’t move. Nor did Youngjae. A few more minutes later, about ten men in suits formed a circle around the management team. Youngmi, who stood the closest to Jaebum, signaled for the move. Screams after screams pierced through the entire airport the moment the protective bubble around the idol started advancing.

Youngjae felt powerless. His feet glued to the ground. Eyes stared right at the center of the bubble. Heart pounded a thousand mile an hour. There was no explanation as to why his body refused to move even an inch. Something in his brain ordered for him to wait.

Wait for Im Jaebum to come to him.

Of course, Jaebum didn’t take long at all.

Behind the mask, the idol smiled as his eyes met the lawyer’s fixated gaze. The outer bodyguard layer opened up as they approached Youngjae. The management team also opened a pathway. Jaebum took off his jacket. Suddenly, the sound of one’s anxious heartbeat drowned out all those obsessive screams. Youngjae found it harder to breathe every second that Jaebum appeared closer than before.

“All this just because I didn’t want you to leave without me,” Jaebum said, voice soft enough to melt Youngjae’s heart. He swung his jacket over Youngjae’s head. “Stop leaving me.” He pressed Youngjae’s body against him and made sure the jacket was covering Youngjae’s head and face. They moved together out of the airport.

There were already cars waiting in front. Jaebum carefully guided Youngjae inside the vehicle before following suit. Only when the driver took off on the road did Youngjae finally pull the jacket down from his head. He looked over to Jaebum. The idol took off his hat and mask, revealing the undeniably handsome face of a confident man. Catching Youngjae’s stare, Jaebum smiled and reached over to fix his love’s hair.

Jaebum sighed, “Did you have to do that?” His hand retreated but his smile remained forgiving. “I was so worried. I almost cried, you know.”

Youngjae just stared, not sure what to say or what to feel.

“You wouldn’t care anyways, huh? Um… I left your bags with my manager. Youngmi-noona will give them to you later.”

Still staring without a single word slipping past his lips, Youngjae desperately suppressed his confusing emotions.

“Say something… You’re going to make me blush if you keep staring like that.” The idol winked, the smile now etched into a playful smirk.

That was enough to snap Youngjae out of whatever dimension he got himself stuck in. Turning away from that irresistible face, Youngjae collected all his thoughts and feelings again. The conclusion his brain and heart came up with didn’t sit right with him. Youngjae hated how secure he was feeling in Jaebum’s embrace.

He hated how stirred up his heart became because of Jaebum.

<||><||><||><||><||>

“Why am I here?” The lawyer asked, purely confused at the destination he ended up at.

Jaebum punched in the code to the gates in a casual manner. “You’re tired. I’m tired. We both should rest.”

“Yeah, but why at your house?”

“Because the driver meant to drop me off?”

“Right,” Youngjae pulled out his phone to call a ride. But before he could unlock the device, Jaebum was quick to grab at it first. “Hey! Give it back!”

“It’s not like I’ll do anything to you. Why are you so… I don’t know. Distant?”

“We have no reason to-”

“Relax. I just want you to rest before you head back. Nothing else.”

Shutting his eyes tight, Youngjae gave up. “Fine.”

With a winning grin, Jaebum placed his hand on Youngjae’s back and lightly pushed the younger inside the house. It wasn’t the first time Youngjae was here, but the last time he was, he left with the urge to cry. Though, he was glad everything was back to the way it was. No broken wine bottles. No used cigarettes. No stained carpet. No anger.

The owner of the house dragged his guest up the stairs in a hurry. And the guest went with it. They stopped in front of a room next to the main bedroom. Jaebum opened the door and walked in first. “Rest here. Take a nap or something. Earlier, at the airport, you didn’t look too good.”

“So that’s it…” Youngjae removed his jacket. “I’m fine.”

“You weren’t, though. You looked really scared.”

“Did I?”

“If you weren’t in shock, would you even allow me to touch you like that?” Jaebum leaned against the doorframe with his arms crossed against his chest. Taking Youngjae’s silence as an answer, Jaebum said, “I thought so.”

“I would,” Youngjae sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Jaebum with earnesty. “Thank you. I mean it.”

Another second and Jaebum would have slipped off the doorframe in surprise. Blinking slowly as if his brain was trying to register what just happened, Jaebum exhaled cautiously. “Wow. Didn’t think we’d get this far.”

Youngjae rolled his eyes and scoffed, “You helped me and I thanked you. It’s normal. Why are you being so dramatic about it?”

“Because it’s coming from you.”

“Why? I can’t be a decent person?”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“Then what?”

“What are you expecting me to do after you said that?”

Sensing the drastic change in atmosphere, Youngjae cowered a little on the bed. Any person can tell how fast the tension rose from a simple question. Youngjae dropped his gaze on Jaebum and stared at his lap instead. He can’t handle it right now. He didn’t know why his mouth blurted out things like that.

Jaebum watched Youngjae retract himself from confrontation yet again. The older sighed and placed the phone he stole earlier on the nightstand next to the bed. “I’ll be in the next room if you need anything. Rest up. And if you want to, you can stay for dinner later.” Another look at Youngjae’s slumped shoulders, Jaebum held back the urge to pat the younger’s head. Jaebum pursed his lips and left the room, closing the door behind him.

Nothing in the room moved for some good minutes. Youngjae decided to lie down and continue drowning himself in his own thoughts. It seems like whatever he does, he’ll still wind up in Jaebum’s arms. Sighing, Youngjae rolled onto his side. His heart was not letting him rest peacefully.

Like the universe noticed how torn the lawyer was, his phone vibrated from an incoming call. Youngjae reached over and answered the call without hesitation. For some reason, he hoped that the caller was the person next door.

“WHERE ARE YOU?! DID SOMEONE KIDNAPPED MY DEAR BEST FRIEND?!” Kang Han practically screamed into the phone.

“I’m fine,” Youngjae replied dryly, not even affected by the low shouting at the slightest.

“Oh. Well, so then where are you?”

“Jaebum’s.”

“WHO?!”

“Im Jaebum’s house.”

“WHY?!”

“I don’t know,” Youngjae sighed, rolling on to the other side. “I don’t know what’s happening.”

“What happened…”

At this, Youngjae laughed, tears streamed down his cheeks, “A lot. A lot happened. A-and I don’t know who I am anymore.”