DISGUISE

Jaehwan packed his luggage with a heavy heart. Having parted ways with Hyuk and Hongbin after three hours of futile searching, he was disappointed to not have had the chance to see Ravi for what was perhaps the last time.

He was glad, however, to have been informed just moments ago that Ravi had returned home safely.

He looks like a zombie, Hongbin had told him. He just kept muttering about some book and about wanting to find Leo. He looks downright exhausted.

It worried Jaehwan a lot, but there was just so little time, if any, for him to even see Ravi again.

Why would he even care? He sighed to himself. He’s got so many things on his mind right now. My leaving is the least of his worries.

He put down the clothes in his hands, reaching over to pull open a drawer. He picked up the photographs they had taken at the arcade photobooth, grinning solemnly at how Ravi looked like he was having the time of his life.

It was all going so well, he thought. Until the moment he finally learned the truth about his past…

“When will I get to see your smile again…? When can we go back to the days when we had nothing on our minds, except to have fun together?”

He frowned and shook his head before packing the photographs carefully into his bag. “We can never go back.”

He sighed. So this is how our brief happiness ends.

He patted himself lightly on his cheeks. “Quit thinking like that, Lee Jaehwan!”

“You can’t be so selfish. He’s going through so much right now and all you care about is whether he still gives a damn about you, like before?”

“They belong together…to each other. And you can’t be thinking about being with him. Not now, not in the future.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He picked up his clothes and resumed folding them neatly into a pile, humming along to his favourite songs to distract himself.

Arghhh, he stopped abruptly and buried his face in the fabric. This hurts so much. Why did things have to turn out this way?

Will I even get to see him again?

He sat up and grabbed his phone. I’ll leave it to him to decide…

To Ravi:

Hey Ravi, how are you feeling? I’m sorry for what you’re going through…

The pain and helplessness you must be feeling right now is beyond my imagination. I can only hope that you will be able to remain strong like you always have. I’m sure things will fall into place once the time is right…

I’m sure Leo did what he did because he believed in his decision. I hope you do not blame him or blame yourself over something that is beyond yours and his control.

Smile, alright?

Actually…

Ravi, I really feel like it’s selfish of me to bother you right now, but I really hope to see you one last time before I leave for Korea tomorrow

In case Hongbin didn’t tell you…yeah I’m flying back tomorrow. It’s a morning flight – I’ll be heading straight to the airport from my hotel.

You know, it’s strange how we’d been hanging out for something like a week, but I feel like our connection transcends beyond that. From our heart-to-heart conversations to the darkest secrets that now bind all of us together, I feel outright irresponsible for not being able to be here for you any longer, to support you through your tough times. My heart is already attached to this place, the people I’ve met here, and the memories I’ve made. It’s sad that my vacation has to end this way, but I promise you that our friendship has not ended. It has been nice knowing you here and I hope to hear from you soon when I’m back in Korea. I will want to know if you’re well!

In fact, I still hope to be able to see you for the last time. I have so many more things to tell you that I can’t put in words here

If you want to, I’ll be waiting for you in the airport, at the place we first met…two hours before my 9 am flight :)

You don’t have to turn up if you don’t feel like it; I know you have so many more important things and troubling issues to worry about, and no matter what, I’ll support you even when I’m perhaps an entire continent away.

At the very least, I just hope we’ll stay in contact, alright? Promise me you’ll be well. Do keep me updated ^^

He bit his lip and sent the last message. “I think that still sounded too demanding,” he sighed. “…despite how nicely I worded it…”

“Why would he bother about sending a friend off at this time? He has too much on his plate now.”

He checked Ravi’s status. He had been offline for an entire day. I don’t think he even has the mood to check his phone now…

He shut his eyes and crossed his fingers.

“Please, turn up…”

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“Han Sanghyuk. Get your here.”

“What? Your place? Again??”

Hongbin could see, in his mind, the frown on Hyuk’s face as he answered the call.

“About trying out out my game?? Have you forgotten?”

“Now?” Hyuk crossed his arms. “It’s 7am in the morning, Dumbbin.”

“I’m. Pressed. For. Time. It’s already midday in Korea, and I’m pretty sure you know that. My friend’s gonna be in trouble once the inspection starts.”

Hyuk bit his lip. He truly did not want to turn down Hongbin’s invitation. “I…I gotta send hyung off though.”

Hongbin sighed in frustration. “Get Ravi to do it. Not like Jaehwan would prefer seeing your face over his, you know.”

“Do what? What about Jaehwan?”

Hongbin spun around in surprise. “R-Ravi? You’re up…early.”

“Up?” Ravi shook his head. He walked into the room and sat down on Hongbin’s bed, looking over at the younger one who was seated by his computer. “I didn’t even sleep.”

Hongbin blinked. At least you look much fresher than you did last night.

“What about Jaehwan?” Ravi repeated. He gazed at the floor. “I feel like I haven’t talked to him in days.”

“He’s- “

“DUMBBIN?? You there?” Hyuk shrieked through the phone, startling Hongbin.

“Oh- yes, sorry! Was talking to Ravi.”

“So do I come over or not?”

Hongbin glanced at Ravi hesitantly. “Umm- “

Ravi was scowling hard at the computer screen behind him. He turned to Hongbin and motioned for him to get off the phone.

“Gimme a moment, Hyuk,” Hongbin replied nervously. He stared back at Ravi. “What..?”

“You’ve been…playing games? All this time?”

Hongbin gulped. Ravi rarely raised his voice at him.

“No, it’s- “

“I thought you’d at least be half as frantic as I am right now,” Ravi eyed him in disbelief.  “So much has happened and we don’t even know where the Jung Leo is. And you’re playing your games like nothing ever happened??”

Hongbin bit his lip.

“He was your best friend, Hongbin,” he snapped, his face like thunder. “In the past, you hated his guts for what he’d done and I kept quiet about it. But now everything’s so different – we now know why he truly did what he did and I can’t believe you’re still not the least bit worried? We’re talking about a man whom we were both so close to!”

“I…” Hongbin started. It’s not like that…

“You told me the guilt was eating you up. Then why aren’t you doing anything about it? Am I the only one caught in frenzy? The only one stupidly going around looking for him just like I did a year ago??” Ravi pointed at the screen. “While you’re here with your dumb games- “

He froze. He leant in closer, narrowing his eyes.

“What’s…this?” he turned to Hongbin. He pointed to an old man on the screen. “Why is his name…the Wise One?”

Hongbin blinked. “Umm, ‘cos….he’s the Wizard??”

Ravi continued to stare at him.

“It’s one of the characters. For the game Hakyeon and I were making,” he added, frowning at Ravi’s sudden distraction. “But anyway, about Leo- “

“Wait. Hak-Hakyeon?”

“Yeah?” Hongbin nodded. “C’mon. You know about this. We’ve been both trying to build a game together. Hakyeon has been in charge of the character designs all along, though.”

“You did mention about some project…” Ravi started. “But…what the ?”

“Why? What’s happening??”

Ravi turned back to the screen, grabbing the mouse at the same time. “Character design?” he asked. “What other characters are there?? Show me!”

“Erm…” Hongbin leant in and took over the mouse from Ravi. He made a few clicks and opened up a list of characters, each name accompanied with stunning graphics.

Ravi scanned through the names, his mouth falling open as something caught his eyes.

“Won…shik?”

Hongbin nodded. “Oh, that? Hakyeon insisted on that weird-sounding name.”

Ravi froze. “What…the …?”

He recalled how Hakyeon had always wanted to borrow the book, but he had not been able to lend it to him. I told him I was not done reading…he thought. There was no way he knew about the story.

He gulped. Somethings was off.

He grabbed Hongbin by the shoulders. “Where’s Hakyeon now?! Is he online somewhere?? You guys always Skype, right??”

“Yeah…? Chill, man,” Hongbin frowned. What’s got into him? “Give me a sec. I was just talking to him.” He exited the game screen and entered Skype – just when there was an incoming video call from Hakyeon.

“Accept it!!”

Hongbin rolled his eyes but complied anyway.

Ravi held his breath as Hakyeon’s face appeared, taking up the whole screen. The man’s dark pupils twinkled as his cheeks gave way to a huge smile.

“H-Hakyeon?? Why…why are you smiling like that…”

“Yeah, you look so creepy,” Hongbin added, stifling a chuckle. “You look like you’ve been expecting something.”

“I have been expecting you, Ravi.”

Ravi froze. “Y-you…”

He narrowed his eyes. “Who the  are you?”

Hakyeon continued smiling. “You still don’t know, do you?”

Ravi wanted to shake his head, but he could not even move a single muscle.

Hakyeon smirked.

“I’m the deity you’ve been yelling at to appear.”

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Jaehwan fiddled with his toes.

He glanced at his watch and felt his heart sink.

“Hyuk’s got something on…and the man I’m waiting for doesn’t seem like he’ll be coming,” he sighed.

“Looks like I’ll still be alone, after all,” he gazed at the floor. “Even during my last moments here.”

He glanced around the area. He recalled the first time he had met Ravi at the very same spot – gingerly approaching him for directions and being startled by his exceptionally low voice.

He recalled running towards Ravi much later in a hurry to return him his phone, as well as how he had spontaneously commented on his wallpaper.

It’s a cute dog, he had said.

The snake…it’s cute too, Ravi had complimented his tattoo in return.

He smiled upon the thought, lifting his arm up to gaze at his tattoo. I still can’t believe so much more has happened since then.

He flicked his arm and noticed the time on his watch. The corners of his lips sank lower as his smile gradually disappeared.

So…he’s really not coming.

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Ravi gripped the edges of the desk.

“Y-you’re…” he gulped. “Margaret?”

Hongbin glanced back and forth between Hakyeon and Ravi. The ’s going on?

“It’s the other way round, Ravi. The old lady is just one of the many forms I take.”

Ravi shook his head in disbelief. “No…it can’t be…”

He grabbed the edges of the monitor suddenly, leaning in until his face was just inches away from the screen. “Then…what’s the purpose of all this…? Why…why did you sell me that book? What were you trying to achieve?”

“And…” he glanced back at Hongbin. “What was your purpose in getting close to…us?”

There was silence.

“ANSWER ME!” Ravi screamed, jolting Hongbin off his chair. “Why did you do all this??  What…what the is wrong with you? You’ve been disguising yourself beside us all this while, haven’t you?? Why…why are you so ing sick in the mind?!”

He turned to Hongbin. “Say something!”

Hongbin stared back at him with a dazed look in his eyes. “W-what…”

“He’s. Not. Human,” Ravi seethed into his ear as he pointed agitatedly at the screen. “Have you not realised that!”

“Huh…?”

Hakyeon smirked. “I’ll answer your questions soon, Ravi. But just a moment.” He turned to face Hongbin, who looked confused and traumatised.

“Go and answer the door, sweetie.”

“W-What?” Hongbin snapped out of his thoughts, suddenly realising that the doorbell had been ringing for a while.

“Get your guest here and then we can begin our discussion.”

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