I looked down. Thinking of everything. Asking myself, should I jump or not? Is this really what I want? Will this be the end that I need? For the last time, answer me please.

I looked up, trying to find something. Searching for anything from the universe. Nothing.

Then I looked around, no ones coming. You idiot. Why do you think you're here, alone at the rooftop? Because no one cares. There's no one out there who remembers.

But really, just this once. Give me a clear sign. Universe, I'm asking you. For the last time, if you could save me.

Then all of sudden, someone appeared. I turn around as I hear the door opened. He looks so shocked seeing me at the edge, ready to jump.

We locked eyes. Suddenly, it felt like someone came to save me. And then I got off balancef and started falling. Then I woke up.

I wake up and find myself alone, inside my room. I looked at my calendar, it is the day that everyone whom I know dreams about being a doctor will take the Medical Admission Test. And here I am, struggling to survive college.

Today's classes were all about groupworks. Nothing new. I acted as if nothing's wrong. I lead every group I was assigned to and everything went fine after a few hardships.

Then I got to the rooftop of the highest building. I enjoyed sitting at the edge of it, trying my luck if I would fall or survive another day. I watch the sunsets from here. Everyday, without fail.

Sometimes I take photos of those times. When the skied turn from blue to orange, sometimes a shade of pink and purple. There are times when it just turn dark.

Then the stars appear. I always look for the first star, and wish that the next day would be different. But so far, nothing's changed. My life is still the same old disappointment that I've been living with.

Maybe tomorrow then, maybe tomorrow I'll comeback here and do what I'm supposed to do.

--

I was at the edge again, but this time I can see the waves meeting the rocks. I stand at the tip of a cliff, with tiny rocks falling down a hundred feet dive whenever I move my feet. I looked up again, waiting for something. Something that I don't even know. Then as if on cue, the sign came to me. The splash sounds are too loud but I can hear someone calling my name.

"Luna. Please. Don't do it." I turn around and saw the same guy from my last dream. I tried thinking about his name but I can't remember.

"Why wouldn't I do this? Why woulf you care?" I asked.

"I don't even know. It feels right to stop you from making this mistake. It feels like I was sent here to save you." The boy looks as confused as I am.

"You're not even real."

"I'm real, what I don't know is, are you even real?" He said. I looked at him and everything looked different. My dream started having colors. Of course, this is not real. But it felt like I know him. It felt like I've met him before but forgot when and how. Then I was falling again, okay time to wake up.

Today was the day that they release the results. I tried to look away from my social media accounts but I can't. My groups for academic requirements are almost based through those accounts and now all I can see are posts of those who passed.

"Congratulations. Thank you, Road to Med school" is all that I saw. Okay, I can't take this anymore. Don't get me wrong, I am at the top of my class. Never failed a subject before. People always think that I'm the leader and that I am gokd with what I do. But they don't know that this is not the life I wanted. This is not the life I planned.

--

This time, it is real. I'm at the edge of the rooftop. Not to watch the sunset, but to set together with sun. I was waiting for the darkness to conquer the world once again.

Just this once, for the last time. If there's someone who can hear me. Save me please.

Then I heard my name.

"Luna." I turned around and saw him. This time, I didn't fall. But you can say that I just fell for him.