"Woah," Gayeon whispered to me, as we stood together at the back of the crowd. "Those tablecloths look great with the crepe paper. Did you do that?"

I looked at the nearest table, lined with two mason jars of sunflowers and a blue glass votive, the candle flickering warmly inside. "I helped. But this was really Sehun's thing."

"Impressive," she said. "The student becomes the master."

"What?"

"It's a martial arts movie thing," she explained, smiling at Jaebum, who was standing beside her in a button-down and shorts, holding her hand. "His favorite."

To this, I only nodded, as the groom and Chen, his friend who was officiating, took their places under the big tree at the end of our makeshift aisle. Suho was in a suit that looked like it was hot and uncomfortable - I hadn't made it to the wish yet, but if I had, I would've considered, for him, breathable fabric - Chen in khaki pants, sandals, and a white shirt. Off to the side, in Wooyoung's typical spot, was Sehun, who then signaled to Kyungsoo to start the music. When he caught my eye, I looked away.

I was still processing what had happened - or not - at the store. We hadn't talked again, as the entire ride home Sehun had been putting out fires involving both the beer and a blown breaker due to Kyungsoo's piano amp. Then, as soon as we'd arrived, Tzuyu was waiting in the driveway, arms crossed, clearly unhappy and ready for A Discussion. I'd slipped inside to help with the keg and everything else, but had to assume whatever had followed had not gone well, as I gotten a text from him soon after that said only: CONGRATS. YOU WIN.

Now, as the song on Kyungsoo's phone attached to the speaker, began, everyone turned to the porch, where Jihyo stood with her mom. She was a gorgeous bride, in a plain white sheath and her grandmother's gold cross on a thin necklace, her something old and borrowed. The new was her flower crown made herself. The blue, the beads on her white sandals, was visible with each step she took as she walked down the stairs.

She smiled at me as she passed, and I nodded, then bent down to adjust a bit of her hem that was doubled over, catching on the grass. A tiny detail, but one people would notice. And if you could fix something something, why wouldn't you?

"I still feel weird we're here," Gayeon said in my ear as Jihyo and Suho turned to face each other. "We don't even know these people."

"You saved everyone from eating nothing but pizza," I said. "You've earned an invite."

That had been another crisis. Sehun's list for the friends who'd gone grocery shopping had requested pizzas on the front, with frozen eggrolls and meatballs and other finger food continued on the back. When they didn't turn it over and then did their own strange math about how many they'd need, we ended up with forty frozen pies and nothing else. Luckily, Gayeon and Jaebum hadn't left her house yet, and between their two trucks were able to produce enough grilled cheese and ham and chicken biscuits on the fly to nicely round out the menu. It had taken only a quick canvas of the early arriving guests to find a couple of people happy to preheat the oven and arrange things on the cookie sheets, all of which were now warming up as Jihyo and Suho said their vows. Then all we had to do was plop them on trays and we'd be good.

Now I watched as the bride and groom took each other's hands, their very short ceremony already speeding toward its reception. When they began their vows, I looked up at the twinkling lights in the trees as a breeze blew across the yard and all of us assembled. Then I looked up at Sehun again, his face in profile, watching as Jihyo slid a ring on Suho's finger. What had he meant, that it was good to know I wanted him to be happy? I wanted to think about it, and yet didn't, at the same time.

Moments later, the bride and groom came back down the aisle, Suho flushed and actually smiling, Jihyo waving her bouquets over her head. As everyone cheered, throwing the flower petals we'd collected from pruning Julee's older roses, my phone buzzed. I pulled it out: Mark.

OFF AT 8. DINNER?

I looked up at Sehun, who was talking to Chen, shaking his hand. Kyungsoo was starting the playlist that was his gift to the bride and groom. I'd looked at it earlier when he'd been taking a smoke break. It was mostly slow, folky music mixed with the occasional rap song, not exactly ideal for dancing. Not that I was going to say anything. At that point, I'd planned to be long gone by the time the party really got going, yet somehow I was still here. And now, I realized, I wanted to stay.

KIND OF GOT CAUGHT UP, I typed back. TOMORROW? Then I slid it back in my pocket, not waiting for a response.

A half hour later, the three of the six tablecloths were ripped, we were out of grilled cheese squares, and Kyungsoo had been overthrown as DJ by a group of people demanding danceable music. Jaebum had started up the food truck to produce some more biscuits, while Gayeon and I took our turn at the wish wall, which had been set up just by the backyard gate. As I straightened the box of cards and replaced the pens in their holder, I wondered if I'd ever attend any wedding without lapsing into organizer mode. Probably not.

"So what is this again?" Gayeon asked.

"You write a wish for the bride and groom," I said.

"What if you don't know them at all?"

"Then you write what you would want someone to wish for you at your wedding," I said. "Peace, friendship, never fighting over who washes the dishes. That kind of thing."

"I love washing dishes, though," she said, considering her card. "Maybe I'll just wish for lots of good food. That's what my parents say is key to their marriage."

"You can go a long way on grilled cheese sandwiches."

"Or they can." She bent over the table and began to write. "What are you going to write?"

I wasn't sure, at the moment. As I thought, I looked around the yard again, taking in the crowd of people dancing, the white tables lined with candles, one guest's baby playing with Vivi, who had a white bandana tied around his neck for the occasion. I didn't realize I'd been actually looking for something - or someone - specific until I spotted Sehun, standing near the food truck with Jaebum. He was in the middle of saying something, using his hands to make a point, and I watched him for a minute, surprising myself again with how much I wanted him to see me, as well. When he did, and broke into a smile, I felt my face flush.

"I don't think you can wish that for the bride and groom," Gayeon said. "Maybe for you, though."

I looked at her. "What are you talking about?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, Suzy. You and Sehun have so much chemistry you're basically flammable."

"Gayeon," I said, voice low, "he could not be more on the rebound."

"Which means you won the bet, and so pick yourself for him to go out with next," she replied, folding her card and sticking it on the wall. "It's perfect. You can act like you can't stand him all you want. But that blush doesn't lie."

"It's not like that," I said, although if asked, I wasn't sure I could say what it was like, actually. I opened my card. "And I never planned to pick me."

"Plans change," she said. "You know that better than anyone."

She was right. But so was I. Even driving back with the tables earlier, I'd had no idea I might be where I was now, on the edge of something with the last person I'd ever expect. You would think I'd have learned that the word is full of surprises, though, and maybe not just the kind that break your heart.

I started to write. I'd made so many wishes for so many couples quietly in my head as they drove away, but writing the words out made it seem more real, possible. For them, and maybe for me.

FOR YOU, I WISH FOR SECOND CHANCES.

I folded it shut, then put it on the wall before I could change my mind, right above Gayeon's. As Jaebum called for her and she walked his way, I crossed the yard, moving to the music. When I looked back at the wish wall from a distance, it was a sea of squares: I couldn't even find mine among them. So many things we ask for, hope for, prayers put out into a world so wide: there was no way they could all be answered. But you had to keep asking. If you didn't, nothing even had a chance of coming true.

On the dance floor, Suho and Jihyo were in the center, holding hands, him even sweatier, her flower crown lopsided. Chen, his white shirt also damp, danced beside them, along with Jihyo's mom and some other friends, all in a circle. Behind them, Julee was spinning in the arms of the neighbor, while Tzuyu danced with Kevin Kim, Julee's med student groom-to-be. Yet again, I found myself on the outside of all this, a line only I could see dividing us. This time, though, there was no rule: I could cross over it. Isn't that the way everything begins? A night, a love, a now and for the last time.

When I saw Sehun coming toward me from the other side of the floor, the moment seemed even more fated, like my wish had come true. All this time I'd been waiting for my second chance. Maybe he'd been here all along.

"Hey," I said to him, holding out my hand. "Dancing is healing. Want to heal?"

"Yeah. Sure. Of course," he said quickly, but didn't move. "It's about time, right?"

I tilted my head. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, equally fast, too fast. He flashed me a smile, then dropped it when he saw my serious expression. Behind me, I could hear someone cheering: a girl in a black dress danced by, her skirt brushing my leg. "I was just . . . at the truck, talking with Gayeon."

"Oh," I said, confused. "Okay."

He looked over at Julee, doing a shimmy as Kevin clapped. "I told her . . . how I feel about you. How I've felt."

This was big, I knew. Huge. But it didn't match - what he was saying and how he was saying it. Like a rhythm slightly off, the beat you somehow can't clap to. "And?"

His face softened, and he stepped closer. Around us, the music was picking up, faster, people turning up. "Why didn't you tell me? About the shooting? About Jongsuk?"

Jongsuk. It was the last name I wanted to hear. It didn't belong in this place, at this moment. All around me people were happy, flushed and in motion, the way the world had been on that fall morning not even a year ago. How stupid I was to think Sehun and I could somehow be happy, too, after such a bumpy, uneven beginning. To be really happy, you need epic, like Jongsuk, and we weren't that. Not even close.

"Gayeon told you?" I said, my voice sounding light, like it was rising away from me.

"She was looking out for you," he said. "She's protective. I get it. What you went through . . ."

"Don't pity me," I said quickly, stepping back. "Don't do that. I don't need it."

"I'm not," he replied, moving closer to close the gap between us. "I just feel like an idiot, all that stuff I said about breakups and you being cynical. You must've felt -"

"I don't feel anything," I said, cutting him off. "It's fine."

"Hey." He reached out for my arm, but I shook him off, the response reflexive, immediate. "Look. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I didn't know. And if I said stupid things. I'm just . . . sorry."

The music was changing now, the current song winding down, another, slower one coming in. A perfect transition, and how common is that? I hated that I noticed.

"I'm sorry, too," I said, stepping back farther. "And I should go, actually. I told Mark I'd meet him."

He blinked at me. "You did?"

"Yeah," I said. "I mean, I didn't know I'd won the bet, yet. And I kind of like this dating thing. I can see why you're into it."

"I don't want to do it anymore, though," he said immediately. "And I don't care about the bet. You're more than that. You always have been. That was just a way to win you."

I wished the music would stop. I wish everything would stop. But wishes don't mean anything. I'd been right about that all along.

"You don't want me," I shook my head. "Nothing will ever be as good as what I had. I'll never be what I was."

"Suzy." He tried to reach for my hand; again, I pulled away. "Don't say that."

"I have to go," I said, my voice breaking. "I have somewhere to be."

He looked at me for a second, and I wondered about all the other ways this might have gone, possibilities for the future. Not that it mattered.

"Fine. Go," he said. "But know this. I meant what I said to Gayeon. How I feel about you. Nothing's changed for me."

That must be nice, I thought. Me, I could never count on anything without it changing before my eyes.

Somehow, I was moving off the edge of the dance floor, across the line. Then I went farther, over the grass, through the gate, and out to me car. I'd always wondered about the people who leave weddings early, the idea of not seeing the whole thing through the end. Everyone has their reasons, as unique and varied as faces and thumbprints. You could observe all you want and still never get close. But I felt sure that as I left, alone, no one was watching me.