Bobhwan | Binhwan | This is one of my faves, still have to finish it though

 

 

Having siblings have always been a double-edged sword situation.

And Hanbin wasn't one to deny it.

 

Jiwon and him always picked up fight when they were younger, and they still do, but the older was always the winner : the one to get the last part of chocolate pie (because Hanbin had fat cheeks), the one to get the expensive electric car (because Hanbin was "too young"), the one to get good grades without trying (he swore he tried, but nothing could do, he was a B- student), the one to get in the Art School on a whim (he waited for months to have a positive reply), in fact life wasn't tender with him and constantly being compared to the other was a burden.

However, his older brother played his role quite well and Hanbin felt thankful for having such a sibling.

Jiwon always shared the last part of pie with him, even under their parents' disapproval stare, he let him play with the remote controlled car when the adults weren't watching, he helped Hanbin with his studies so he could graduate more easily, he encouraged his younger brother to apply for his dreamt school and waited for the answer with him. Hanbin still remembered the whole-hearted cry of joy that didn't come from him but from Jiwon when they opened the e-mail.

Hanbin was this good-looking guy. Rather tall, lean, abs and pelvis bones visible effortlessly with black deep orbs instead of pupils and irises, cherry lips completing the marble-statue-like features of his face.

Jiwon was this even more handsome guy. Both standing at the same height, Jiwon had this sharp jawline, this intense gaze and his signature bunny smile to compete against his brother's charms.

Where Hanbin was distant, almost shy and introvert, Jiwon was playfull, friendly and easy-going.
It was their biggest difference, and it mattered.

 

 

 

7 year-old :

Little Hanbin was playing alone in the sand with a toy rake and its matching green seal when a big shadow appeared above him. The older boy looked down on him with a soft grin, surrounded by two buddies.

"Hey, can I borrow your firetruck if you don't play with it ?" He asked, already reaching out a hand to grab the plastic toy.

Hanbin was a sweet kid, had always been told to share, so he nodded quietly. The boy thanked him, took what he was aiming for and the three ran to the other side of the park to play in the grass.

Hanbin got home with dried tears on his cheeks that day, hair and clothes dirtied by mud and crushed leaves. Jiwon, who had stayed at home to do his homeworks, was the first to see him and his poor state. He immediatly took his younger brother's wrist and lead him to the bathroom.

The ointment was cold on his small scratches, but his heart was warm looking at his brother.

 

 

The next day, Jiwon lent him his gameboy and told him to stay at home while he was going out for a small moment. He smiled gladly and slid under the blanket of their share bed, the console between his small hands.

His older brother came back after a while, hands linked behind his back.

"Hey Bin, I have something for you."

The younger looked up from the screen and raised his eyebrows.

"Why ? It's not my birthday .."

The older grinned playfully and a satisfied laugh escaped his lips. He came closer to the younger and pushed a red plastic toy against his narrow chest. Hanbin's eyes went down and he suddenly dropped the gameboy to circle his arms around the older's neck with an excited gasp. If Jiwon wasn't used to it, they would have fell backwards under the strenght of the sudden hug.

"How did you do it ? They were so strong ! Are you hurt ?"

His questions flowed like a stream and the older only patted the top of his head, a comforting smile on his face.

"I told them to give it back to me and they did. Your older brother is powerful, you know ! Better eat a lot of vegetables to become like me." He joked.

"Heh ? You don't even eat them yourself ! Vegetables ."

"What did I hear ? Who taught you that Kim Hanbin ?"

Their laughers soon filled the bedroom as they started to mess with each other ribs thanks to merciless tickles.

 

One hour later, Jiwon right cheek had turned violet and Hanbin was crying again, firetruck held thightly against his chest.

"I told you already, it's not that painful .. They hit me, but I hit them harder. Don't you believe me ?"

"But - But you wouldn't be like that if I didn't lend my truck .." The younger said shakily between two sobs.

"That's ok. It's my duty to protect you, Hanbin. Look, it's already fading .."

All he could see was an even bigger mark and stranger colours on the cheek. But Jiwon's smile was so genuine, he stopped crying.

His tears were cold on his skin, but his heart was warm looking at his hero.

 

 

 

14 year-old :

The two brothers were lazily laying on the large leather couch at this late hour on a week day, their parents out again for some business of theirs. Money wasn't missing in this housing, but they sure missed the adults' presence. The younger, with his eyes glued to the giant flat screen of their home cinema, folded his part of pizza to shove it in his mouth. During the process, some metled cheese dropped on the carton box filled with chorizo oil and Jiwon picked it up with the tip of his fingers. Before he could have put it in his mouth as intended, Hanbin seized his wrist and closed his lips on the cheese. He quickly backed away from his older brother to avoid any physical reply and looked at him with a satisfied grin. The latter was wearing a disgusted expression, holding his hand up and still, seemingly too afraid of smearing saliva on his precious sweatshirt.

"What the heck Hanbin ? It was just cheese !"

"My cheese, to be true. You've eaten all your parts, fault is yours." He sneered, eyes back on the screen, munching on the crust.

Jiwon refrained himself from rolling his eyes but he sighed loud enough to cause Hanbin to laugh harder.

"Ok, fine. Great. Just eat slowly, I'll start hitting on the ice cream then. Don't mind me if I eat more than a half." The other replied after taking the time to think of a petty revenge.

He knew the younger had a soft spot for the Caramel and Brownie chocolate ice cream they ordered along with the two XXL pizzas. Hanbin stopped all actions and looked at him with disbelief. Did he hear it well ? His own brother, playing dirty like that ? Well, he kind of asked for it, but he was young, wild and free, no offense.

"Oh Kim Jiwon, no. You're not going to harm my precious."

"Do you think I'm scared of you ?"

 

 

The 14 year-old and the 15 year-old boys stood mute in front of their parents, chin hanging low and teeth bitting the inside of their cheek. Hands clapsed behind their backs, they were asking for forgiveness.

"How are we supposed to trust you with the house if you can't even eat by yourself without ruining the whole living room with chocolate ice cream ?!" Their mother shouted, the veins of her thin neck showing like they were going to pop at any moment.

"We didn't do it in purpose, mom .." The older stated, voice not as confident as usual. Hanbin remained quiet, eyes locked on his favorite socks.

"Don't try to justify yourselves, young man !" She pointed an accusative finger at Jiwon and kept the pose during a second before turning away with a heavy sigh. "Ok, enough, I'm done with you guys. In your room. I don't want you down here before dinner time."

The two didn't waste any time to run up the stairs, hearing the upset voice of the only woman of the housing during their ascent.

"My embroided carpet, the leather couch, even the angora cushions ! Are they crazy ? What went wrong with them ?"

"Honey, that's ok. We'll just buy new ones." Their father tried to comfort her, remaining his usual calm self.

Hanbin knew his father was rather amused by their behavior more than angry at them, he saw the hint of smile on his face even if he'd tried to remain discrete.

 

 

Right when he was about to open the door of his room, Jiwon grabbed his wrist and lead them to his own bedroom. He refrained a smile thinking about his older brother. Even after all this time, they'd remained the same. The older wanted to make sure he was okay and not going to cry alone in his room. Hanbin let himself fall on the fluffy blanket of the bed while Jiwon slumped on his small sized couch with a huge smile.

"Man, that was a silly idea to fight with ice cream .." the older said, neck broken on the backrest.

"Hey, you started it ! I told you not to mess with it." he replied laughing.

"Look at you, all barks no bites .."

They locked eyes with each other and laughed again before muffled knocks on the wooden door were heard. They went silent and Hanbin immediatly bent up to sit. Behind the door, they heard their father's voice.

"Boys, I think your mother meant each one of you in their own room when she scolded you .."

Jiwon raised his shoulders and got up to turn the doorknob, letting the younger out.

"I told him so but he insisted to come here. You know how our little baby is .."

What ? Who ? When ? Hanbin felt betrayed, but it wasn't surprizing. The older never missed a chance to make fun of him. Even if Jiwon's back was facing him, he could only imagine the smile stretching his lips. Without thinking much, he stomped on the other's foot when he passed by him to reach his bedroom. He knew the older must have clenched his jaw really hard to keep his mouth closed.

"I'm sorry .. I just love my older brother so much, papa."

Their father raised both hands to show his neutrality in the debate and take a few steps backwards to leave the battlefield. He only laughed at them and went downstairs with a small "Take care guys, I'll let you know when dinner is ready." During that time, Hanbin crossed the narrow corridor, steps light on the wood flooring. When his socks encountered the carpet of his room, he turned to face his brother. They both had their hand on the door of their respective room.

"Well, see you, baby brother."

"See you, oh dear Hyung."

They closed their door with a smile.

 

 

 

Eight months ago, age 21:

He sat behind his computer and went through his files with a satisfied smile. He'd finally made it to the Art School and joined his older brother in the music section. He couldn't tell since when he wanted it, but one thing was sure, now that he got it, he won't let it go.

His mouse went above one file in particular, and his smile grew even bigger. He put his earphones on and clicked the Play button to enjoy the first notes of his now favorite self-composed song.

He softened thinking about the smaller man he met few weeks ago, walking alone under the sunbeams.

 

 

Jiwon had his arm around Hanbin's shoulders, leading him to the huge amphi where the younger was supposed to have a lecture. Distracted as ever, he only half-listened to what the other was talking about, humming from time to time to persuade the older he was still focused. It was when he saw him.

An angel, bathed in the glorious sunlight, walking toward his fate. Hanbin heard his heart pop in his chest, saw a million stars dancing before his eyes and he felt dizzy. It was him. His one and only.

The smaller hyung became his muse as Hanbin started to get to know more and more about him. Who could have believe he was two years older than him ? And what to say about his deadly cute height ?

One day, Hanbin found a demo tape where the older was singing. And what voice.

He could listen to it all day long until feeling drunk, drunk in love.
This little man was driving him crazy, crazy in love.

 

 

 

Five months ago :

He was laying on Jiwon's bed as in the old days, sighing and smiling fondly at the ceiling. His brother was working on his computer, bumping his head to the rhythm, trying to help him out with his love affair.

"Why don't you go talk to him ?"

"Are you crazy ? How could I do that ? I'll never know what to say. What if he rejected me even before I start talking ?"

"And then what ? Are you going to wait until he notices you instead ?"

"Well, I did think about this possibili-"

"For God's sake Hanbin ! You're not a middle-schooler anymore, grab your balls, man !" the older burst, pushing his chair away from his desk. His hands went through his messy hair and he sighed, looking desperately at the younger.

They needed to talk seriously now.

"Hanbin, we've been talking about this for almost two hours you know, and from what I heard, you've been on him for like .. three months. If this hyung is as perfect as you said, don't you think other girls, or guys, are already trying to hit on him ?"

It took him a while to register what the other was trying to make him understand, and it was probably true. Hanbin pushed on his back to sit, starting to worry.

"You're right .. It would if he was already taken .."

"That's why I'm telling you to hurry your lazy . Glad you understood this time, little brother."

Hanbin remained silent and Jiwon got back to his work, thinking the subject was closed.

The younger smiled.

"Hyung ?"

The older hummed, signaling he was listening.

"Thank you."

Jiwon turned his head to face Hanbin and stared at him, surprised. They never really thanked each other, but when they did, they really meant it. He showed his bunny teeth and Hanbin's heart got warm. 

"Aren't you going to tell me his name by the way ?" The older asked after a small break.

"No, you'll have to wait until I got his number." He replied, already starting a game on his phone.

Jiwon rolled his eyes and laughed at him.

"Better be before I turn 50, then."

He merely had the time to throw a slipper to his brother before being expulsed from the bedroom by an annoyed kick.

"Stop disturbing me, you brat !"

 

 

 

A few days later :

"Did you talk to him already ?" Jiwon asked between two gulps of Pepsi and a chicken nugget.

"No .. I was busy working on my project. 6 songs in a month is though."

"I know what you're talking about .."

"You know, but you still have the time to hang out with your boyfriend ?" he sneered, knowing perfectly how his brother was getting cheesy whenever his lover was mentioned.

The two started to date officially few weeks ago and Hanbin had been the first one to know. It had started as some flirting but eventually turned into a serious relationship in which Jiwon threw himself whole-heartedly. He was obviously under the spell of this stranger and Hanbin had never seen him so happy before. Seing how his big brother was doing so well in love only made him more determined to achieve his own love story.

"You should bring him here some day, I don't even know who it is since you don't want to tell me his name."

"Look at the one who's talking .." but suddenly, Jiwon's cheeks started to becore reddish. "Do-Do you think it's really ok for me to bring him here ? I mean .. It has only been three weeks .."

Jiwon mad, yes. Jiwon sick, yes. Jiwon crying, yes. Jiwon embarassed, never. Just who was this human being capable of changing the Almighty Kim Jiwon into a cutie pie ? Hanbin was dumbfounded.

"Yes, do it. I don't see where is the problem ! If it's too soon, you'll still have your birthday as an excuse to make him come."

His brother went on his knees and bowed, quiet.

Ok, please. Someone give him back his brother, he was on the verge of doing an attack.

"I never thought I was going to say that one day, but you're a genius Kim Hanbin."

 

 

Hanbin was walking down the stairs to get himself a glass of water when Jiwon pushed open the entrance door, looking over his shoulder.

"I'm sorry babe, it's a bit messy."

The lie couldn't have been bigger. Three cleaning ladies were fired to keep the house in an immaculate state (except for the boys' bedrooms after they claimed their intimacy), and they came at least four time a week. Jiwon was nervous.

He knew his heart skipped a beat when he recognized the voice that replied to Jiwon. When his older brother went in and waved him a greeting, the small frame appeared in the daylight and Hanbin heard his heart shattering into pieces. Right behind his brother stood the man who'd occupied his mind for the past months.

He didn't want to believe that his brother was actually going out with his crush.

Kim Jiwon couldn't be Kim Jinhwan's boyfriend.

 

 

 

19 year-old :

 

Jiwon handed him a glass filled with a strange mixture reeking of strong alcohol.

"What's that ?" he asked, dipping his lips into it despite the scrunching of his nose.

"I don't really know either, but it's good." The older replied, tottering slightly with a stupid giggle. Jiwon wasn't drunk, just a bit tipsy actually, but he couldn't say the same about himself. What an idea to taste everything they gave him.

Hanbin rolled his eyes and brought the glass to his lips again, gulping down a good third of the liquid. He made his path through the dancing crowd and prayed for the carpet to resist the unceasing heavy boucing with the small rest of conscience he had. He still remembered the ice cream episode of his late 14th year of life.

The music coming out of the standing speakers was really loud and the alcohol wasn't helping to deal with his forming headache. He wasn't used to this kind of party, but his brother insisted to throw one in their house during their parent's trip abroad and he couldn't resolve himself to crush the older's hopes and expectations. Pushing some more bodies, he finally found the couch he was looking for and carefully sat on it, right next to a beautiful man. Hanbin didn't pay attention to him at first, but after drinking up all his glass, he brought his attention to the sleeping head out of boredom.

The boy had a calm expression emphasized by the milky color of his skin, soft neck exposed by the weird angle he was sleeping in. His dark fringe was covering half of his face, but from what he could see, the nose was perfectly built, not to talk about the lips. The stranger suddenly moved and Hanbin froze, letting a forehead land on his arm. The shock wasn't expected for both and the smaller man was snatched out of his slumber. The little head lifted up and he was, by consequence, faced with soft brown eyes, rounded by the suprise. They stared at each other for a while and he saw a cute birth mark under the other's right eye which he couldn't see before. From this distance, the slightly parted lips were even more kissable.

So he did it. He kissed that stranger.

Against expectations, two tiny hands made their way through his hair and on his nape, deepening the kiss.

It was his first, and he liked it.

A shy tongue then his lips to ask for the entrance, which he gladly gave without any protest. It was sweet and comfortable.

He wished they could go on until forever like that, but he felt the other slowly drawing back. He let go against his will, even a bit disappointed to be honest, but the lips went to kiss his jawline and pepper kisses against his neck, covered by soft giggles. It sounded like a holy tinkle to Hanbin's ears and he let himself drown in this ocean of soft lips and flower scent.

He interwined their fingers as they continued to kiss tenderly, totally insensible to their surroundings. Again, the smaller broke the kiss and Hanbin looked at him and his flushed cheeks and swollen lips.

"What's wrong ?" He asked softly, already kissing the other behind the ear.

A shy laugh answered him, followed by a peck on his cheek.

"Nothing, except the fact that we don't know each other and that we're probably too drunk to remember anything of this by tomorrow morning."

He captured his lips without thinking and they kissed a little more before he drew back himself, short on oxygen.

"Then do you want to stop .. ?"

The other pressed his body against his and cupped his face to shower him with butterfly kisses.

"No. It's too good to stop."

 

A while later, they were cut by Jiwon's voice coming out of the speakers, probably standing on the makeshift stage of the party, calling for Hanbin to join him. The stranger looked at him and understanding struck him when he saw the expression Hanbin was making. He let out a small laugh.

"Oh, so it's your graduation-acceptation party then ? Congrats for getting in the school you wanted."

The stranger kissed him for one last time and pushed him up, forcing him to go back to his older brother. When his frame stood out of the crowd, Jiwon smiled and dedicated him his new self-composed rap, something about how proud he was of being his older brother and how he'd never forget some of the memories they made together.

Hanbin smiled sheepishly, still a bit dazed by the drinks and the kisses.

Jiwon handed him the mic. He grabbed it.

Before he remembered opening his mouth, the crowd was cheering loudly and Jiwon was pating him excitedly.

"As expected from my little brother !"

And in the buzzing of the crowd's laughers mixed to the blasting music, someone reached for his wrist and dragged him through the swarm of people, out of the house to their freshly cut lawn.

The other let himself fall on it while Hanbin struggled not to stumble over the mingled limbs. They ended up laying next to each others, looking up to the uncovered sky where a million stars seemed to shine only for them.

"Dont you want to know my name ?" the other asked.

Hanbin took a moment to think about it, just a few seconds.

"I do .. But I wont ask. Everything is more likable with a bit of mystery."

He felt slim fingers slowly interwining with his again. In no time, a frail body was casting its shadow over him and he instinctively closed his eyes. He smiled when tender lips took his chapped ones. They didn't raise their voices again, but he knew.

They knew.

The breeze blowing was warm and carrying a lot of promises, and mainly the one of meeting again under the same moon.

 

Two brothers, Kim Jinhwan and this party that everyone seemed to have forgotten about ..

 

 

 

Present :

 

Hanbin knew he should have followed his guts when they told him to crash at Junhwe's before coming home around 6PM.

Thanks to one or two sleepless nights, he managed to finish his monthly assignment and had decided to get some rest in the comfort of the bedroom he'd missed so much. After the bus ride, he was finally pushing open the door of the house.

As usual, he put down his backpack on the first step of the stairs and went directly to the kitchen to find something to fill his empty stomach.

Unfortunately, no one expected him to be back home at 3, and certainly not the two boys cuddling in the middle of the room.

The view wasn't that surprising, but even after all this time, Hanbin still couldn't get over his heartbreak. Every time he jumped on them was just a reminder of his poorly healing scar.

Jinhwan was busy spreading strawberry jam on a pile of sliced bread while Bobby backhugged him with a smile when Hanbin entered. The taller just had the time to put his chin on the other's shoulder, earning a quiet chuckle, before Hanbin decided to make them notice his presence.

"I'm home !", he cheered, opening the fridge to grab the milk as if he wasn't going though an internal storm.

Jinhwan was the first to greet him with a smile (Hanbin swore his heart melted) to be followed by Jiwon's familiar voice.

"Hi Binnie. Want some sandwiches ?" the older brother asked, releasing at the same time his captive. "Jinhwan makes the most delicious ones, like they have just the perfect amount of peanut butter covered with the perfect amount of jam" he added, taking one and bitting in it as to prove his words.

His boyfriend gently pushed him with his elbow as his hands were holding two slices ready to be clasped together, a clear laugh escaping his perfect pink lips.

"You dummy, Hanbin is allergic to peanuts !"

"Oh hyung, that's not the first time he tries to kill me. I'm used to it" he replied, drinking his milk directly from the bottle.

Maybe the cold liquid helped him hiding the blush menacing to creep on his cheeks, he didn't know. But he was sure he felt a tug at his heart when he realized that Jinhwan cared about him.

"Hanbin, take a glass for God's sake. I don't want to accidentally taste your saliva !"

As he slowly swirled the cap back on the bottle and raised a mocking eyebrow at his brother's slighty pouty tone, he swallowed the comment he was ready to blurt out. Jinhwan was already standing in front of him, a plate of sandwiches between his tiny hands.

"I made some without peanut butter, in case you were hungry once you came back from school." the older explained, knowing that the youngest was a bit startled. "I planned to cover them with plastic but I guess it's even better if you eat them now"

Hanbin took the plate and nodded, gnawing at his lower lip. After a quick thank you, he left the kitchen and picked up his bag as he rushed upstairs, needing some time alone and far, far away from his monster crush. He closed the door of his bedroom with his back and threw his stuff on the couch before carefully putting the plate on his bed. He sat down next to it and stared at the piled squares of bread from which sipped a thin layer of jam. He sighed heavily and took a bite, reaching for his laptop while munching on it. He almost teared up when the strawberry flavor smeared with the mellow of the bread. It was indeed a perfect amount.

Jinhwan was so near, and yet so far. How was he supposed to surpass his feelings ?

 

 

Jiwon's bedroom was really comfortable in Hanbin's memories, so why did he and Jinhwan always prefer to make out in the living room, literally where anyone could stumble upon them ? Not that there were a lot of people in the house in fact, but this still wasn't a reason. Maybe should he ask his brother one day.

So today was one more day where Jiwon was on the couch, Jinhwan on his lap. The older was pushing back the other's hair, smiling playfully. From the distance separating their mouths, he knew the smaller one was refusing to kiss his brother. Maybe, just maybe, he felt some satisfaction warming up his chest. His bare foot finally reached the last step of the stairs and he coughed, once again signaling his presence. The couple was used to be interrupted in their cuddling moments by now.

"Hey Bin, just in time !" Bobby cheered, taking a look over his shoulder to look at his younger brother. "Jinan hyung wants to go make some grocery shopping but I still have a huge project to finish, can you go with him ?"