The weekend was a blur to Doha but for Jinseok, he was worried. Since he sent Doha back home, there’s no news from the other male. It made him worried but he knew Doha wanted to be alone and won’t reach out until he’s ready. Somehow that trait at times made Jinseok felt irritated because he couldn’t do anything to help.

Doha spent the weekend confining in his own world. Dark, gloomy and lost. The house felt so cold and empty. He would cry at times, or staring at the spaces. He didn’t have the will to do anything. Luckily he was still sobered enough to attend the class on Monday, that’s because Jinseok called him.

When Jinseok saw Doha at the college, his chest tightened. He had never seen such expression on Doha, so dread so empty. Doha noticed Jinseok and plastered a weak smile. Jinseok smiled a bit and voiced out his concern. “Are you even eating?” Jinseok asked straightforwardly, without a proper greeting. Doha didn’t know what to answer and just gave a shrug. Jinseok sighed and pulled Doha to walk with him. “I don’t care, we won’t go for the first class today. You need to eat.” Doha wanted to protest but Jinseok won’t listen once he was determined to do something. In the end Doha let Jinseok pulled him to the cafeteria. Everything didn’t really come to him, when he was back to reality they already took a seat with food Jinseok bought. “Eat.”

“Jinseok...”

“No, don’t pull the card of no appetite. Your face had sunken, you look like you lost weight. I do regret letting you go home. I should have stuffed you with more food.” Doha was aware that Jinseok was worried. But he really didn’t have the mood to entertain that. He stared at the food blankly. “Doha. Eat, please.” Jinseok pleaded. Doha looked at him and a pang of guilt hit him. He didn’t like the face Jinseok had at the moment. He felt like he had disappointed his best friend. Slowly he took the spoon and began to eat the noodle. Jinseok smiled a little.

Both of them skipped the first class by feeding Doha some food. Jinseok didn’t ask or start a conversation, he let Doha ate silently until it was finished. Jinseok offered the drink before telling the other that they should go for the second class soon. Doha was just nodded.

When they were just sitting in silence waiting for the time to move, Jinseok saw Youngdoo coming into the cafeteria. He was about to wave his hand before he realized Youngdoo noticed them, more like Doha, and turned away leaving the cafeteria. Jinseok frowned to that reaction but he didn’t say anything. Out of sudden, Doha started a conversation. “Jinseok.”

“Yes?”

“Do you see him around?” There’s no need to ask who Doha was asking about but Jinseok took a moment to answer because of the earlier incident. While Doha thought Jinseok didn’t get his question. “I mean, Youngdoo...”

“Ah, eum. I don’t see him.”

Doha sighed, he could feel that Youngdoo purposely avoided him. Even though there might a chance that Youngdoo didn’t come to class, Doha somehow was sure Youngdoo fulfilled his word, to stay away. The word felt bitter in his mouth and pierced his heart. “Doha?” Jinseok called out when he was seeing the face changing quite quickly in the short of time. He knew Doha was thinking inward. Doha gave a weak smile.

“We should go now?” Doha said. Jinseok looked at his watch and nodded, allowing Doha to shift away the conversation. They walked away from the cafeteria to their class. Jinseok was debating if he could say something. He knew Doha won’t talk but he at least wanted his best friend to know that he’s there.

“Doha.” Jinseok called when they’re near to their class. Doha stopped and turned. “I don’t really know about what happened between you and him but really, I want you to know that I’m here for you if you need supports and everything.” Doha nodded.

“Thanks, Jinseok ah.”

“And... we shared a class with him, you can find him there...” Jinseok didn’t know why he said that but he felt like he should remind Doha about that. Doha nodded. Jinseok gave an encouragement pat on Doha’s back and both of them walked to the class again.

Doha was very sure now that Youngdoo was avoiding him. The male took the farthest seat from them and put a distance. Doha tried to talk with him after the class but Youngdoo left first, ignoring Doha’s call. Jinseok who watched the scene unfold felt terrible and guilty. Did his plan make it even worst? Jinseok debated himself when he saw the devastated look on Doha.

Youngdoo looked at his manager when he told him that someone from his class came to find him. He didn’t know much of his classmates, none of them he could call acquaintance that could come and find him at his workplace. Youngdoo was currently with one of his former group members modelling for a clothing line. He was actually surprised that someone came from his class because if it’s not his fans, how did that person know he was here? Among people from his class, he was sure none of them are his fans even though some of the girls were fangirlling over him every time he came into the class. Before he enrolled in this college, his manager had made sure that all the class he will be joining won’t have scary fangirls so that he could have a peace. Youngdoo walked to the place where his manager mentioned the ‘classmate’ of his was waiting. Walking closer, the silhouette looked familiar. The guy turned and spotted his presence.

“Hey... sorry to disturb you. But this is the only place I could get hold of you. I didn’t know your number and where you’re staying now.” Youngdoo just nodded lightly.

“It’s okay, Jinseok. So...” Jinseok looked at Youngdoo.

“I won’t try to ask about what happened but I came here because I feel the need to apologize and try to know if there’s something I can do to fix this.” Jinseok took a breath. “About you and Doha... since that day... I feel like my plan was making it worst...” Jinseok said heavy in guilt. Youngdoo looked at him, exhaling. He brought both of his hands holding Jinseok’s shoulder.

“Jinseok. It wasn’t your fault. Don’t beat yourself with guilt. You tried to help and it’s actually helping. Just the result wasn’t good.” Jinseok looked up. Youngdoo gave a smile. “And... this, there’s nothing more you can do. Even me, I can’t do anything anymore. It only can be untied by Doha himself. So, don’t feel bad anymore. You did your part already and I’m thankful for that.” Youngdoo said softly assuring Jinseok. Jinseok was taking the words into his mind before nodding later. Youngdoo smiled. “Thanks for coming and meeting me.”

Jinseok shook his head. “No, this is what I should do.” Jinseok took a breath. “I really hope things will get better.” Youngdoo just gave a small smile. “Anyway, you must be busy. Sorry for taking your time.”

“It’s fine.”

“Good luck for the shooting?” Youngdoo nodded. Jinseok bade a goodbye with some more words of encouragement. Youngdoo just sent him away with his eyes. You had such a good friend, Doha.

Doha saw Youngdoo walking into the exam hall. The time had passed by so quickly and Doha didn’t remember much of it but he knew large part of it, he was thinking about Youngdoo and their problem. After Jinseok met Youngdoo, his friend told what Youngdoo said to him. Listening to it, Doha knew if he wanted them to be okay again then he needed to talk with Youngdoo about the feelings again. Doha was afraid, he wasn’t sure what to say and to Jinseok, he told him that he needed time to think. Jinseok just gave a nod and advised Doha to think wisely and not letting it affecting his life or Jinseok would drag Doha to confront Youngdoo himself. With that threat, Doha tried not to show how affected he was with no Youngdoo in his daily routine.

To be honest, Doha was confused. Confused that why he was so dreaded once Youngdoo decided to walk and stay away from him. When it was what he wanted at first. When he was the one who told Youngdoo that after hearing the confession. He couldn’t pinpoint what’s wrong and the reason. That made him hesitated to talk with Youngdoo. Because he was confused with his own emotion.

The exam was done and for Doha and Jinseok, it was their last paper also the last thing to be done before they graduated – depending on their result – as both of them were in the final semester already. When all the papers were being collected, Doha saw Youngdoo was packing his stationery. He wanted to approach him; feeling like it was the last chance for him to see Youngdoo. As he was contemplating, Youngdoo already walked out from the hall. Doha bit his lips when he let his last chance slipped away.

“Hey.” Doha turned when he heard Jinseok’s voice. “Let’s go?” Doha nodded and got up. The best friends walked together, Jinseok had told him that after their last paper Jinseok had to go to the council room for something before they went out to celebrate their final paper and the finishing study. Doha waited Jinseok to do his things while his mind was swirling with the thought of Youngdoo and his missed chance.

They settled to have a meal as much as they wanted at their favourite buffet restaurant. After being so full, Jinseok suggested them to enjoy some walking at the nearby park to digest the food. Doha just agreed as he didn’t feel like going home yet. The two males walked together, Jinseok was bringing random topics about the exams and future. Doha was responding well even though Jinseok could see Doha wasn’t entirely with him. After some moment, Jinseok pulled Doha to sit at the bench. “Doha.”

“Yes?”

“We’re graduating this year.” Doha nodded. Jinseok looked at Doha. “Youngdoo will have another year. What are you going to do about him?” Doha looked down. Jinseok sighed. “Doha.”

“I- don’t know.” Jinseok touched Doha’s shoulder.

“You have been dragging this matter for too long. I’m sure your mother started to ask too, right?” Jinseok said. Doha gulped and nodded. His parents were informed about Youngdoo moved out from his place a month after that day when his mother came to visit him. He didn’t know what to say to his mother and stayed silent about it while his mother told his stepfather. From there, he didn’t know what happened but his mother always asked him if there’s anything happened. The mother knew her son the best and she really wanted to help so she always tried to talk but Doha always ran away.

“I...”

“Doha.” Jinseok tapped his shoulder. “To be honest, at this point, I feel like you’re just running away. You’re scared so you denied the truth.” Doha looked at him. Jinseok took a breath. “You might not tell me everything but I can tell Youngdoo likes you... and I’m pretty sure the reason why you’re doing this because you also feel the same.” Doha stiffened.

“I...”

“Try to deny me, Doha.” Doha bit his lips. Jinseok exhaled. “It’s your choice. You know the truth, the answer but you push it away. It depends on you now but my advice is don’t do things that you will regret later. Think carefully. And I will help you if you need me.” Jinseok patted the back few times before pulling away, letting Doha swimming through his thought.

Jinseok patted Doha’s shoulder. Doha turned and saw Jinseok. “Congrats.”  Jinseok grinned, congratulating Doha for receiving the first class honour. Today, their result was out and in few weeks the graduation will be held. Jinseok sat beside Doha.

“You got pretty well too. Congrats.” Jinseok smiled to Doha’s words. Doha was opening his mouth to say something but Jinseok cut him off.

“I did go and peek on his result at the board. He passed his exams. If he did well in the next year, he could graduate at right time.” Jinseok said. Doha closed his mouth; he was contemplating to ask earlier. He could had go and look on it himself but Doha didn’t know why he couldn’t. Listening to Jinseok, he felt better and relief. At least Youngdoo didn’t neglect his study. “You should go and congratulate him.” Doha looked at Jinseok. Jinseok smiled. “Come on, take this as an excuse to see him. I know you didn’t know how to approach him. Use your card as his stepbrother.”

Doha casted his eyes down. “Should I...”

“You should!” Jinseok pulled out his phone and typed something. Doha felt his phone vibrated. “I sent you his schedule for this week. But I really suggest you to go and find him today as it’s the result day, it won’t be weird if you call him out today.” Jinseok explained. Doha looked at Jinseok.

“How did you get this?” Jinseok grinned.

“It’s easy when you stan him.” Doha blinked and nodded. “Go and meet him okay?” Doha nodded. He got up, taking Jinseok in surprise.

“I’m going now.” Jinseok smiled.

“Good. Good luck, man.” Doha thanked Jinseok and left. Jinseok watched the male left. He smiled as he saw the light step. ‘Go get your happiness.’ Jinseok beamed as he let his mind wandering, of course landed into his fudanshi world.

Doha took a breath, leaning against the car. He decided to call out Youngdoo to the park they came last time as the younger didn’t have any schedule right then. He thought it will be hard to contact Youngdoo, he was afraid that Youngdoo might block his number or something, or changed his number. He was overwhelmed when the younger picked up his call earlier.

“Hello?” Doha gulped. He could feel his hand trembling.

“Emm... can we meet?”

“Why?”

“I have something to say.”

“Where?”

“Is it okay to meet at the park? The one we go before.” Doha bit his lips as he walked to the parking lot.

“Okay.” The short answer made Doha exhaled in relief. He chirped thank you and said goodbye. The other male didn’t utter anything just ended the call.

Doha shifted few times, kicking the ground as he anxiously waited for the younger. His mind was clouded with memories, the time he spent with Youngdoo. A dull aching in his heart made him clenching his fist.

His thought was scattered when he heard a cough next to him. Doha just saw shoes standing next to him and he looked up. He blinked, dumbstruck as he turned his body. His breath hitched slightly as feelings washed over him. Seeing this guy standing so close, in flesh and looking at him without any expression, Doha realized something. He missed this guy. So much.

“Y- You’re here.” Doha stuttered. Youngdoo just gave a nod.

“What it is?” Youngdoo asked, his tone lacked of emotion. Doha gulped and ran his eyes away from Youngdoo’s.

“Uh, um. Firstly, congrats. Your result.” Doha gave a smile. Youngdoo stared at Doha.

“Okay, thanks.” The nonchalant respond made Doha felt small and nervous. “What’s more?” Doha bit his lips, looking down.

“I- about before...”

“Is there more to say? I do as you said.” Youngdoo cut him off. Doha looked up. Their eyes met. Doha shivered as he saw nothing in those eyes, empty. He hated that and he badly wanted it to return to those times it was shining with emotions. Doha felt another surge of emotion; I don’t want to lose that warmth.

“I was scared before. Everything seems dark, we have no chance to stay together. Our parents are married, we’re supposed to be brother.” Youngdoo looked away and defensively leaned against the car. Doha watched the action and clenched his fists tighter. “I have my reason why I say like that.”

“Why you’re saying this?”

“People always said you will see how meaningful it is when you lose it.” Doha let out a dry chuckle. “I’m feeling that way since you moved out.” Youngdoo looked at Doha. “I miss you. So badly.”

Youngdoo frowned as he stared at Doha. Doha stared back, watching the confusion plastered on the younger’s face. Youngdoo startled when Doha suddenly hugged him. “If before I was scared about the world’s view, right now I’m scared that I will lose you. I’m sorry for hurting you... I- I don’t want you to go. Let’s live together again.” Youngdoo was still stunned, unable to say anything. Doha was holding him tight, snuggling the face into the crook of his neck. The ticklish breeze made Youngdoo back to the reality and then he felt Doha loosened the hug a bit. He was about to say something when Doha suddenly kissed him. The question that lingered in his mind was thrown away. Youngdoo held Doha on the side securely. His eyes softened as he melted into the kiss and kissed back.

“Don’t chase me away again because I won’t leave this time.” Youngdoo uttered after the kiss. He was resting his forehead on Doha. Doha’s lips curled up a little.

“I won’t let you go either.”

“I love you.” Youngdoo whispered and smiled triumphantly as he saw dusty pink decorated Doha’s cheeks. Doha leaned forward for a hug, trying to hide his blushing face. Youngdoo chuckled before he was stunned, thanks to Doha’s whisper next to his ear. Really, he almost died right there.

‘I love you too.’

Six years later

“What brings you to make this decision, Youngdoo ssi?” The interviewer asked. Youngdoo was having a private interview right now. The idol smiled.

“I thought about my future. I enjoy being on stage and meeting fans, but as getting older I think now I want to focus on my own life. My contract with the company will end soon and I think it’s fine. I discuss everything thoroughly with the management.”

“So, you will complete out from entertainment industry?”

“I can’t be sure about it, but fans can still see me around at my cafe. I will be focusing on the business.” The interviewer nodded.

“There’s rumour also that you’re retiring from industry because you’re getting married. Is it true? Fans had been curious about that.” Youngdoo smiled as his eyes casted down to his hand. As if the interviewer got the hint, she was looking at it as well and saw the silver ring on his forth finger. “Should I congratulate you then?” Youngdoo laughed.

“My decision of retiring had no connection at all with that. The main reason why I’m retiring was this is a promise with my father. He let me become singer with the promise that I will stop at age 30 and do other things, like getting stable jobs or do business. I managed to make it coming together with the ends of my contract, so that happened.” Youngdoo smiled. “I’m sorry to all my fans that felt sad or betrayed by my decision. I know I didn’t really repay all their love until now, I’m still in debt. I just hope each one of them know that I appreciate everything and love them. I ask for their understanding.” The interviewer commented that the fans would feel better now. Youngdoo smiled before adding. “About marriage, it’s still in the planning.”

“Engaged?” The interviewer gave a playful smile and Youngdoo nodded. “Congrats. I will wait for the good news and of course, your fans will be happy for you.” Youngdoo smiled and thanked her. “The identity of your partner is still mysterious, you know. That person is not a celebrity, right?” Youngdoo nodded. “Will you disclose the identity prior to marriage?”

Youngdoo smiled softly. “Depend on my lover.” The interviewer was aw-ing and she continued with few questions before wrapping up the interview. Youngdoo thanked her and excused himself as his manager sent her out. He took out his phone and pressed 1 to speed-dial a number he saved. “Babe.”

“Uh, Doo. Can you call later? I’m driving.”

“Oh, okay. Call me back when you arrived. Stay safe.” A hum and the call ended. Youngdoo walked to the elevator, the interview was done in his company’s building so it’s fine for him to move without his manager. Youngdoo decided to meet his boss for some discussion. When he arrived at the office floor, his phone vibrated. A message came in telling that he got a missed call. Must be when he was in the elevator. He dialled the number again.

“Hey.”

“Sorry I was in the elevator earlier. Where are you now?”

“I went to pick up mom at the company, she went to meet dad and I will go back to work later. Why you called?”

“Missed you.” The male on the other line chuckled. “Babe.”

“Yes, I’m listening.”

“How about we get married in public?” A dead silence made Youngdoo felt nervous. “Doha?”

“Doo... will it be okay? I don’t want to make it hard. We barely get our parents’ blessing.”

Youngdoo sighed. “But I really want people to know that I belong to you and you’re to me.” He was sure he could see a smile on Doha’s face.

“I know, Doo. Okay, let’s talk about this with mom and dad first, okay? We will follow whatever they said.” Youngdoo exhaled and nodded.

“Okay... I’m sorry if I... was like forcing you.”

Doha chuckled. “No, baby. I completely understood you, I want to do the same but it’s my part to think a bit more than you.”

“Hey!” Doha continued to chuckle. “When you will be back today?”

“If I could finish the work before 5, I will be back at usual time.” Youngdoo hummed.

“Meet you then. I will prepare food today so do finish work quick and come home fast.” Doha laughed.

“Okay, baby. Will do. Mom is already here, I need to drive. See you soon.”

“Okay, tell mom I say hi. And to you, love you babe.”

“Love you too, Doo. Bye.” Youngdoo smiled as he ended the call. He jumped slightly when someone nudged his side. It was his manager, with sheepish smiles.

“Awww, someone is being so cheesy.”

“Hyung!” The guy laughed. Youngdoo scoffed. “Can we meet the boss today?”

“I checked and he’s free now. Let’s go, keep away your stupid smile.” The guy teased and received a shout from Youngdoo. The manager just laughed as he walked away, followed by Youngdoo. Youngdoo was meeting his boss to further discuss about his ending contract to make sure there won’t be any mistake and conflicting issue. Few people in the company knew about his relationship and his boss was the one who backed up for him so much. To be honest, Youngdoo thought his boss was so kind and a great man.

“I didn’t expect it to turn like this.” Doha voiced out as they sat down at the table that had been reserved for them. Youngdoo smiled.

“Me either. A bit regret that we can’t do it in our own country but hey at least people didn’t get ugly with us.” Youngdoo commented. They looked at the party happened in the garden. When both of them talked with their parents about Youngdoo’s wish to do a public marriage, they didn’t refuse or against it. Maybe their father looked a bit conflicted but with their mother’s support, the idea was accepted. Youngdoo already discussed with his boss for some opinion and his boss was willing to give idea. The first step was disclosing Doha’s identity after Youngdoo officially retired from industry together with their marriage rumour was confirmed. The boss had helped to stop reporters to dig more than necessary in which their relation as stepbrothers is completely sealed from public. They waited to see the reaction before the boss suggested them to prepare a marriage with small number of reporters present at the wedding. As for that, the idea of getting married in another country was their mother’s because she wanted them to register the marriage properly. So here they were, in a private wedding with garden theme in Canada.

Youngdoo turned to look at Doha who caught his stare. He smiled before smirking playfully.  “Babe~”

“What’s up in your head?” Doha asked raising his brow. Youngdoo grinned.

“I love you, husband.” Doha stared at him before chuckling.

“Me too, baby.” Youngdoo moved closer to give a kiss. Doha melted into it, kissing back lovingly. “Thanks for everything.”

“Thanks for coming back that time.” Doha smiled.

“I don’t regret my behaviour because it helped me see how much you meant for me. But I regret your tears.” Youngdoo beamed.

“My lovely husband, those tears aren’t regrettable, it’s a memory.” Youngdoo pecked Doha. “I love you so much.” Doha smiled, his charming dimples flashed with ray of happiness. Their eyes shared the same glint, heart swelling and whispering of hope for eternity.

A/N: Hey, Dolls~ Yeah, finally with the last chapter. Huuu, it's sad that this already ended. Anyway, before anything else, I'm going to tell you about the changes like usual, hehe. In the original one, Cheng Qing did move out from the house after arguing with Feng He who didn't accept the feeling. Eventually, Feng He thought Cheng Qing just needed space and left, so he still treated Cheng Qing like usual at college but Cheng Qing ignored him. Meng Meng who didn't know what happened feels like it's her fault about the love letter (I think I did tell you about this in the previous A/N), so she went to meet Cheng Qing personally at his workplace and apologized. Basically, what Youngdoo said here almost similar like Cheng Qing. He didn't blame Meng Meng for that and told her not to worry, plus everything only could be solved if Feng He stepped forward. Start from here, it's a bit different. Meng Meng didn't tell Feng He what she heard from Cheng Qing because Feng He and Meng Meng fought a bit over what happened, unlike Jinseok here. The exam still happened, with Cheng Qing sitting in front of Feng He and ignored him. The original story did rush stuff where after exam only shows Meng Meng and Feng He reconciled then straight away to result day. There's a bit different about towards the result day (moreover the celebration thingy didn't have in the original story), I'm lazy to explain but Meng Meng wasn't the one who told Feng He to find Cheng Qing, like Jinseok gave Youngdoo's scehedule to Doha. Feng He called out Cheng Qing on his own, congratulated him over passing the exam and eventually told the younger to come staying with him as well as voiced out what he was feeling - not in clear word, just implying by asking him to return. Weird ending thou (this is what triggered me to write my own version thou), the two ended up lying on the ground with Feng He's head on Cheng Qing's arm, big smile on Cheng Qing and Feng He staring at him. Like, the mood thou, it should have a kiss scene or at least snuggle, but nope that didn't happen, sadly. Just ended like that. Lol. And you can see here I even write Youngdoo's retirement and marriage. How wonderful isn't it? Haha. Okay, that's my frustration talking anyway. So... this story had come to the end. To be honest, I do enjoy write this one because I really like the plot from original story. And yet, DoDoo do fit the character I want to build in this version of mine. And, as said by my friend who don't know the story at all, when I show her one pic of Cheng Qing (Wu Duke) he do remind her of Youngdoo. In that picture, they have similar shape of face, I noticed that too. Haha and coincidently that time I already write this story. Huhu. It's a fate I think. Anyway, I think that's all. It's a long A/N, haha. I wanna say thanks to readers (silnet/not), subbers and supporters for everything, I apologize for mistakes I make through the story *bow* So, here I OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED that STAY AWAY FROM ME HAS ENDED. *throw confetti and wipes tears* Annyeong Dolls, let's meet again in my another story ^^ COMMENTS ARE LOVED.