It was 6 AM. The sunlight was falling straight on my face. I pulled blanket further up to save myself from Seoul Sun. I have no intension to wake up now. I wasnt ready to face the world. World will wait for me. Because I AM CHO KYUHYUN.

You heard me right. Whatever....

I can feel my heart being heavy and beating fast as the time was ticking by. I mournfully wiped my tears and got up to sit in front of the mirror. Yeah because of his memories i cried. I was looking devastated. There visibly bags under my eyes... yeah... dark circles... i was looking ruined... SHIM CHANGMIN

That name not enough to understand the reason why.... hmmm have some brain please.... 

"A good relaxing bubble bath is all i needed now." I thought to myself. It had helped me alot in past, dayss.... monthsss..... I loved how the hot water in sauna calmed me. Being an idol i cant go to such places now. That's how life is right?? Its like peace after a war. 

I looked at my reflection while adjusting my hair. Applied some BB cream to cover up. Settled myself in black t-shirt and black jeans. Fixed a smile on my face with colourless lipbalm on my lips. And these all really covered up the sadness inside me.

I struck a brave posture and walked out of the room to fight the day. May be i was feeling better. May be not.

But I was not ready to give up. I had faced much worser situation. Even survived death. In this second life i wont give up. I am determined. I am brave enough to face him. 

Manager hyungnim and other suju members surprised to see me wake up early and fully fresh. They are beyond surprised to talk anything. Even chullie noona. I was brave enough for a speech now. So i started bravely...

"Hello there, The one you are watching now is CHO KYUHYUN. Super Junior Maknae. If you can relate with it, do understand that there are lots of people who struggle to get and feel better like you. Situations may be different. Some people even have to face everything alone. But I am not alone. I have my family. And my family is not only one with appa umma noona her husband and my neice but also entire super junior my friends managers and people who care me alot like their own family. You guys are more than enough for me. I struggled everyday. But I was never alone because someone was always there for me. So i am thankful. And i will make super junior teukie umma chullie noona and all others proud of me. I will work hard and harder."

I AM PROUD OF MYSELF. YAHHHH I DID WELL RIGHT!!!!!!!

I watched everyones jaw hit the floor. Teukie umma and chullie noona proudly hugged me. After receiving alot of hwaitings from suju dorm i moved to follow schedule. I was receiving alot of messages from chullie noona and others.

Yeah now i have to face the reality. Shim Changmin.... My new partner. We are going to release a new full album. And title song will be recorded today. Hope jae umma will be there. Yeah TVXQ is also preparing comeback. I never thought meeting changmin will turn out to be weird before. Can i face him?

I entered SM main building. I was greeted by rookies. I moved to recording studio. I was welcomed by a bone crushing hug. I know who that is.. I smiled widely.

"JAE UMMA ..... i missed you..." I said aloud. "Jae umma????" Others raised their brows.  "WHAT MY BABY KYU  CANT CALL ME THAT.... YUNHO... IS THAT NOT OKAY FOR YOU????" A pissed off Jae umma is worser than chullie noona. I heard a audible gulp. Since i wasnt released from jae ummaz hug all i can do is imagine.

"Ofcourse boo jae... he is your baby kyu. He can call you jae umma and no one will question it." Leader expressed. After that he joined our hug. Junsu hyung and yoochun hyung also came to join. All left was changmin. After finishing group hug i searched for changmin. He was busy in his phone. Head phone plugged in. He looked into my eyes as i was starring at him for past few seconds. I walked towards his direction.

I smiled and bowed to him greeting him i said " Good morning sunbaenim..". He was shocked. Without a word he walked out of recording room. "Was I being rude??" I doubt. " Anni... he didnt expect such a move from you. Baby kyu dont bother him. I know its hard for you to do an album with him but you will do just fine. Treat him professionally." Jae umma motivated me.

I hugged jae umma. Umma placed a kiss on my cheek. Soon appa yunho also kissed my other cheek. I heard the title song music and got familiar with lyrics. Luckily me and changmin are using different music booth to record songs. We practised together keeping a good distance. When i entered the music both i saw a gift paper wrapped small thing. It says "FOR CHO KYUHYUN" in a tiny paper beside it. So i took it out of curiousity. Unwrapped it and find a fortune cookie inside it.

" Love may wakes in your life again". It was the fortune cookie message. I know Shim Changmin is the one who put it there. I watched him from my music booth. A glass wall still seperate us chwang. But i am afraid to break it and embrace you. Because i dont want to get hurt again. Now I am happy.. not completly... but i started loving my loneliness. So that i dont want to expect anything from others. I smiled looking into his eyes. I fixed my eyes on lyrics and my ears focused on music coming through headset. As jae umma said its better to deal things in  professional manner.

Sadness and depression are all real... real as you and I...

You cant overcome this in a fortnight, but never give up. You will overcome it.....

Shrink your sadness, it will pass by fast!

Extend your happiness, it will linger for long...

Share your grief, it will lighten down!

Share your happiness, it will multiply itself!