“What are you doing here? Don’t you supposed to be at school?” asks the big eyes, little girl.

“I don’t want to go to school,” the cute little boy answer it.

“Why you don’t want to go to school? I love school. I always want to go there because I can play with my friend and learn new things from my teacher,” she walks toward that boy who sat under the slides.

“I hate it. They always call me ugly because I look different from them. They also call me stupid because sometimes I didn’t understand what are they saying. And they said I am weird because I used an alien language when I speak with my mom. They always mock me. I don’t want to go to school anymore,” the boy look like he is about to cry.

“Here, have some cookies. My mom made it today. It’s so delicious,” she takes out a snack and offers it to that boy. The boy takes it and eat it.

“Just ignore them. They don’t deserve to be your friend. They are bad people,” she tries to comfort him.

“They are bad people? But, I don’t want them to disappear,” he stops eating and suddenly he cry.

“What do you mean they will disappear? And why did you suddenly cry?” she confuses by that boy statement.

“Superheroes always fighting against bad people. And then if they lose, they will disappear. I don’t like them, but I don’t want them to disappear,” he keeps crying.

“Oh well, I know I know. They weren’t a bad people. They just… just… ugly!” she looks so panic as the boy is crying out loud.

“Ugly? I never heard about ugly people. Do they disappear too?” he seems to calm down a bit.

“No, no, no. They won’t disappear. You know, if you do something bad like mocking your friend and said something rude, then actually you are an ugly person. But, don’t worry they can be healed and turn to pretty person again. If they do a good deed and help another person they slowly become prettier,” she startled with that boy sudden question and try to found a suitable answer.

“Does being ugly is not good?" he asks her curiously.

“Sure. If you are ugly, you won’t have any friend. Only a true friend who can help you to turn into a pretty person. But, you must have a sincerity to change them. Just like in the fairytale. The beast curse was lifted by Belle because she sincerely loves him,” she explain.

“So, if I do bad things, then I will turn into an ugly person?”

“Yes. Definitely,”

***

“Every time I reminiscing about our first meeting is always make me happy. How could you come out with that idea? Weren’t we so cute back then? I told you I want to have a pretty friend like you. Then the next few days you were standing in front of my class and introduce yourself. You said the reason why you transferring to my school is because you want to meet your pretty friend, make me really happy. I guess this is the reason I fall in love with you,” I come to visit her with a flower bouquet.

“Hey, I want to tell you a secret. Last year, I met a girl. She is lonely and has no friend. That is why I want to be friended with her. She reminds me a lot with my own self before I meet you. But then, I found out she is really funny and interesting. I started to like her but then I found a forbidden secret that turns me into an ugly person. I decided to disappear from her sight, but I don’t want to completely disappear either,” remembering that girl make my heart ache.

“One of my friends ask me why did I do that. Why I want her to forget me. I didn’t know either at that time. But then, I realize I was just being a coward and run away. I don’t want to meet her because I am so ugly. I thought I will be fine if I left, but then I felt so pathetic. But, the milk has been spilled. No matter how hard I try, I can’t turn back the time. That is why I decided to let the ugly me dead and promise myself I won’t run away anymore. But first, I need to turn myself into a handsome man. That’s the only way to fix my mistake,” I know she won’t be happy if she knows I don’t keep my promise.

“Anyway, how are you? Are you happy in there? I really miss you a lot,” I am kneeling down in front of her and give her a bouquet of flower. She is smiling at me. The most beautiful smile I have ever seen. I will never forget those smile and the last word she said to me. I don’t need an answer. Her smile is enough for me. I wipe my tears which falling down on my cheek and stand up after saying goodbye to her. Accidently I step on someone behind me. I apologize and step back to give a way to that person. I look at her again for the last time and then I walk away, leave her with her guest. I am just five step away when that person calls me.

“Excuse me, Have we met before?”, I turn my head and smiling at that girl.

Lisa-ya, do you know? I think my fate it’s not as bad as I thought.  

***

“Jisoo-ya, you aren’t going?” Rose asks me to join dinner party with our fellow Korean student.

“I am sorry but I can’t. I have an appointment. But, I will join you if I can,” I look at my watch and I really have to go now.

“Geez. Fine, then. But, you should bring a handsome guy with you as a payment for your absent,” she is pouting.

“Where could I find a handsome guy? And if I found one, I will keep him for myself. I am late, I should go. Bye! Enjoy the party!” I waving and walk in a rush towards the subway station.

I already sit on the train when I remember I haven’t buy a flower. I hope there is a flower shop in there. Ah, time really flies. I don’t realize it’s already one year after she left me. My precious housemate. I wish she will be happy in her new place.

 One year ago, after I got discharged from hospital because of car accident, I found out that she was hospitalized in the same hospital as me because of heart disease. Her mom told me she has a weak heart since she was born. I didn’t know about it. She never told me. Besides, she always looks so bright so I never expected she suffers from incurable disease. I am crying out loud at the first time I saw her laying down on hospital bed. I feel so helpless, guilty and full of regret. I hope she will wake up so I can tell her everything. I won’t hide anything from her anymore.

This is my first time to feeling so helpless as a friend. Now, I know how does it feel when you didn’t know anything about someone you considered as your close friend. It’s pretty much the same of having one-sided love. She was unconcscious for almost two weeks. But then, a miracle happen.

That day was the day of Art Week exhibition. I know I will be busy all day so I decided to visit her in the morning. Miraculously, she regain consciousness. I am so happy and started to cry. She smiles at me and comforts me. I am very grateful to God because He gives me an opportunity to apologize and thanked her for everything. I told her about my car accident, about the weird guy I met in the hospital, the exhibition, and everything. I also apologize because I always hide something from her.

She was so weak but I can see her eyes were sparkled as a sign she was very happy. She also apologizes to me because she didn’t tell me about her illness. She also wish me the best for my exhibition. We promise we would change and will become a better friend for each other. My phone keep vibrating and I look at the caller, it’s Yoongi-sunbae. I know I was late, but I can’t miss my chance to talk to her. She seem understand and told me to go. I apologize and when I about to leave, she told me that she really loves me. I never see a beautiful smile like that before. I am smiling and told her that I love her too.

That day, become the last day I met her. Her condition was critical and she should found a donor. Unfortunately, she can’t be saved because they can’t found a donor for her. I heard from Mrs. Rose she left us beautifully. She was surrounded by people who loves and cherish her in her last day.

I arrive at my destination and fortunately, there is a flower shop. I walk to her place bringing a bouquet of red roses, her favorite flower. From the distance, I can see a man in a suit was standing in front of her. I slowed down and keep my distance so I can give that man enough time and privacy. Somehow, I can’t keep my eyes off of that man. There is something strange about him. I don’t know why but he seems familiar. But, I can’t remember where I met him.

That man is kneeling down and put a bouquet of sunflower in front of her. I guess it was the sign he will leave soon so I walk closer. I stand behind him and wait for him to leave. He stands up and walk backward but accidently stepping on my foot. He apologizes and steps away to give me a way. I don’t know what gotten into myself but my heart is racing. What’s wrong with this man. I am thinking so hard to remember where I met him but I can’t find the answer. He turns away and leaves. Before he walks too far, I impulsively call him.

“Excuse me, have we met before?” I am surprised by my sudden action. He turns his head and stares at with his beautiful smile. His gaze and his smile look so familiar.

Lisa- ya, why do I think I just have a dejavu?