Myung Soo already finished one last drop of Whiskey before slammed the bottle hard onto the ground after make sure nothing left. He considers buying another, but he doesn't want to go out again. He doesn't want Dongwoo, the cashier of twenty-four hours grocery to make one of his joke about his endless bottle of Whiskey, or if he has much money, he will probably buy Pinot Grigio. Myung Soo doesn't want to talk with anyone. Not now.

He stares at the bare wall of the living room, suddenly realize that what he actually need is air. That's when his eyes caught one of the windows that attached neatly on the wall, revealing the tree that moves into one side as being blown by cold night air at the outside. So, he stands up, walking unsteadily out of Sungyeol's house. The sodium lights glitter as the sounds of the city filters up into the night air, engines revving, doors slamming. He could feel the air that he is craving started to attack him. He feels like take off his clothes as he can't really feel the air, clothes that he put on too thick for his taste.

 He had almost laugh. The city feels as alien to him as it always has. But, then, everywhere does, these days. He then takes a few front step, his arms lifted out to their each side, anyone that saw him might think he's the happiest guy they have ever seen. He then decided to continue his steps, but faster this time. He giggles.

"You see? I'm alive...I'm still alive! Right out on the edge! I'm ing doing what you told me !" Myung Soo breaks into tears, almost falling on his knees but still can manage to stay still and keep walking. He is now far away from his house, he knew that.

' you Sungyeol. you for leaving me,' he whispers. As if the person he is thinking now could hear him.

For once, he almost can see Sungyeol's laugh, Sungyeol's tears, Sungyeol's dull joke, Sungyeol's moan, Sungyeol's bare body, Sungyeol's pale skin, Sungyeol's everything. Why his late boyfriend was so stubborn? Was he blind? Myung Soo did everything for him! Myung Soo left his family for Sungyeol after got caught that they're a lover, Myung Soo lost his job as he skipped months over and over just to stay by Sungyeol's side, he lost his beloved little brother as he was being rude to his own parent and didn't even want to talk to him. He did everything. Included reading Sungyeol's letter in the cafe that Sungyeol told him before signed up and be a donor, without Myung Soo's knowing.

Looking back, for the first nine months after Sungyeol's death was in kind of daze. He went straight to Seoul and simply didn't go home, giddy with freedom, with the appetites that Sungyeol had stirred in him.

For the uncountable times, Myung Soo hates himself, hates Sungyeol and everyone. He now finds his destination, walks quickly towards the empty house that abandoned for almost three years. He doesn't care if he will meet a ghost or whatever it possible will happen, it's better to die for something than live for nothing, right? This abandoned house is Myung Soo's favorite place. He doesn't know either what he like about this house. Maybe it's abandoned, and Myung Soo loves the word abandoned, knowing well that he is not walking alone. He almost falls when his head raises, trying to look what above him. He doesn't know who the owner was but on the right side of this house has a ladder, giving Myung Soo an easy path to go to the house's roof. Myung Soo loves to stay on its roof, it makes him calm. His mind doesn't get haunted by Sungyeol's death again as he can manage his mind to get clear. So, here he is. On the roof, blown by fresh air. Eyes closed, he keeps walking. He's not himself now, he knew. Usually, he will sit here, knees hugged amind-cleared will start processing. But not today. He walks front, step by step till his feet was right on the angle of the roof. But then...

"Myung Soo." Some voice -No! A familiar voice- approached his ear. Myung Soo mindlessly turned his head and lost his balance. Next thing Myung Soo knew, everything was dark.

*

"What's your name, sweetheart ?"

A brace around his neck.

A hand feeling around his head, gently, swiftly.

He is alive. This is actually quite surprising.

He wants to speak, to open his mouth. But then his voice emerges muffled and nonsensical.

"We're going to put you onto a spinal board, okay? You may be a bit uncomfortable for a minute, but I'm going to give you some morphine to make the pain a bit easier." The other voice, hoarse than a previous one. The man's voice is calm, level, as if it is the most normal thing in the world to be lying broken on concrete, staring up at the dark sky. He wants to laugh. He wants to tell him how ridiculous it is that he is here. But nothing seems to work at this moment.

The man's face disappears from dark view. A woman, in a neon jacket, dark curly hair tied back in a ponytail, looms over him and shines a thin torch abruptly in Myung Soo's eyes, gazing at him with the same detached interest as if Myung Soo was a specimen, not a person.

"Do we need to bag him ?" Look ? Myung Soo thinks he is going to hate this woman.

"Multiple fractures. Pupils normal and reactive. BP ninety over sixty. This guy is lucky he just hit that awning. What are the odds of landing on a daybed, eh ?... I don't like that bruising, though." Myung Soo can feel the cold air on his midriff, then it was warm cover by the touch of warm fingers. Myung Soo feels like flying, his body didn't touch the ground this time. Then, he heard a door slide open, he's not sure but is it a van? And the board beneath him moves and briefly the pain, bad, worse, worst,

Everything turns black.

*

A siren and a swirl of blue. It's always siren everywhere in Seoul but he didn't on one of them, but now no more. Neon slides across the interior of the ambulance, hiccups, and repeats, illuminating the unexpectedly packed interior, the man in the green uniform, tapping something on Myung-Soo-not-sure-what, before drag his attention to adjust the drip above Myung Soo's head. The pain has lessened, Myung Soo noticed but with consciousness comes growing terror. A giant airbag is inflating slowly inside Myung Soo, steadily blocking out everything else. Oh, no. Oh, no.

"Mmp~" He whimper although his tongue hurt like hell. It takes two goes for Myung Soo to gain attention from the man again. He turns and stoops towards Myung Soo's face. He smells a lemon, made Myung Soo reminding someone else but he's not sure who. He continues, "Ang I --"

"I'm sorry but it's hard to hear over the siren. We'll be at the hospital soon." The man's voice is deep and romantic (?) He places his hand on Myung Soo's head. It's warm and reassuring. Myung Soo was panic all of a sudden in case the man decided to pull his hand back. "Just hang on in there, can Myung Soo? What's our ETA, Dongwoo hyung ?" Then, Myung Soo heard that wild voice again, which he would label them as Dinosaur every time he heard them. It's Dongwoo. Relieved that he still remember the name clearly. But who is this man? Had a deep voice, this kind of stare that made Myung Soo calm and this loving touch? The skin of this man is expensive, Myung Soo can tell.

"Dong lek go." Myung Soo asked, hoping the man would listen to him. The man leans down so Myung Soo repeats it.

"I wouldn't let go of you. I promise." Myung Soo wants to say a word but something shot up his body painfully and he was gone again.

*

Afterward, they tell Myung Soo what really happened. That Myung Soo just fell from doubled story house, only Myung Soo knew what caused him fell like that. His hips smashed into two pieces and two of his ribs and his collarbone snapped straight through. Thankfully, nothing happens on along his arms, means that he still be able to take a photo using his Canon Camera again. X-rays are a source of some fascination.

Sometimes, whenever he wake up but can't open his eyes, he keeps hearing the voice, - paramedic maybe - talk to the other. Saying that he's lucky, tell him this and wait, smiling, as if Myung Soo should response with a huge grin that can across his ear, or perhaps a little tap dance. No, Myung Soo doesn't feel lucky. The true mean of words of lucky for him is can meet Sungyeol. That's lucky.

The morphine makes Myung Soo sleepy. They up his dose and it's a welcome cold trickle of oblivion.

Myung Soo open his eyes just to see Sungjong, a guy that he missed a lot, sleeping beside him with his head painfully on Myung Soo's arm. But Myung Soo lets him anyway. There's no more iron taste in his mouth, his tongue start with a faint movement, in case  Myung Soo will hit the sensitive or still bloody area. Someone on the sofa, only for him to realize he's in private room in the hospital.

Myung Soo wants to talk, to say something knowing that Sungjong is a light sleeper, but his body doesn't let him to instead give him a pain that reminds Myung Soo The Hell. The pain started to ease a bit especially on his hips as a voice interrupted, almost a whisper, "Are you alright ?" That guy again. "Myung Soo, feels hurt? Anywhere ?" The hand, touch him again. He wants to cry, knew that he's still alive, his family doesn't even know his condition and he wants to cry, because the hand stops touching him instead move to Sungjong's shoulder.

"What's -- Hyung !" Sungjong's voices, he finally can hear it again after almost a decade.

".. Unjong.." Myung Soo called out. Sungjong caresses his cheek with a shocked face, but his mouth creates a beautiful smile. Myung Soo wants to smile too, so he ended up giving a faint movement of his lips, almost a smirk.

"Sorry."

"Don't be daft. We're just glad you're okay. Although you just look like you've done six rounds with Chu Sung Hoon. And MoonSoo... He's on his way." Myung Soo feels shocked for a second but then he feels sad, guilty. The tears that he hold on started to run across his cheek, he can't hear that name. Not that he hate them, but he missed Moon Soo a lot, and the one that he feels the most guilt with. He's not ready to face Moon Soo, not when he didn't even solve his own problem and added another one. Myung Soo glance for a clock, it's 2 a.m and Moon Soo on his way. "Hyung....We are here. No need to worry okay ?"

"Yeah, three of us, including Dongwoo, we'll never leave your side." Myung Soo can't help but smile in his mind. Myung Soo's head -painfully- move to another side, tried hard to give a smile. That guy smile back. "I'm Howon. I knew you wouldn't notice me before--" Sungjong giggles at Howon's awkwardness. The older gives him a death glare, knowing well that Myung Soo will feel someone stupid that listening to their bickering, so Sungjong stopped. "But do you remember me? We had a little talk after you finished watched my freestyle-danced, behind a school hall if I'm not mistaken." And Myung Soo's memory quickly brings Myung Soo on the past time. It's in a cafeteria, he'll correct Howon when his mouth condition getting better later. And it's not him who started the talk first, it's Sungyeol. Sungyeol. Myung Soo's nodding. A sign that he understood and still remembering the past very well. (Which made him felt relieved)

*

They make the fifty-mile journey every day for two weeks, catching the early train down, or sometimes riding their own cars just to see their own not-so-closed-past-friend. Howon brings homemade food, has done so since the day they stare at Myung Soo's lunch and admit that hospital's food such a hell things. Now, their containers are waiting for Howon to pick them up - as Howon forgot to do so for two days consecutively -.

 Myung Soo's hand can't stop from reaching Moon Soo's hair to them from the start till the end of it, appreciate every single hair on his touch and their texture that he is feeling now.

---

"Hyung !" Behind the door revealing a tired-looking face of his little brother, Howon and Sungjong already fell asleep when Myung Soo told them to do so somewhere comforter, and so they found sofa which big enough for two of them to sleep on - in sitting position - It's four in the morning and sleep still not welcome Myung Soo yet as he hardly toss his body around on a bed.

"..Soo..." He tried to catch that name in his mouth but can't. Moon Soo already sobbing up as he found his brother in this sad state. At this point, Myung Soo feels like a bunch of butterflies burst out his stomach. He takes that moment to stare at Moon Soo deep.MoonSoo was changed a lot, his blonde hair tells everything. He even got a new tattoo on his right shoulder too. It's almost a year Myung Soo didn't see him in person. Myung Soo outstretched his hand, missing a hand-hold session with Moon Soo when the other was so scared at the sound of loud thunder in the middle of the heavy rain and came to his room, cuddling. So Moon Soo reached that weak arm, letting out all of his tears that brought many stories on the older shoulders. Myung Soo can't move but pat faintly on Moon Soo's back with his finger, saying 'it's okay. I'm still here' in his mind and hope Moon Soo would hear him as if telepathy really exists. As Moon Soo got better, he asked his brother bout everything. (What's happen to you ?/ You're okay after these right hyung ?/ Is it okay to touch your hand ?)

Then, Myung Soo was being told by Moon Soo that his family still didn't accept him yet for what he did until he finds a girl and married her, showed them up to his family. Myung Soo still ended up shook his head when the younger asked if he willing to do that, the answer was no and will be no, he can't even move on with Sungyeol and why would he like to marry someone -girl- just to fix this stupid thing up? No, Myung Soo will never ever do that. Moon Soo agreed to not tell his whole family what's going on him, though, plus his parents didn't even know where their last son heading off these past two weeks.

Myung Soo didn't even tell his little brother what's going on him recently, doesn't bother or doesn't has the heart to tell him.

*

Myung Soo has two operations to pin his hip, his left foot and arm are in plaster up to the joints. There's one Filipina nurse, Emeline, who always tells Myung Soo the gossips that come all around the hospital when he pushes Myung Soo to X-ray, or to the pharmacy sometimes. What Myung Soo could do is pretend to doesn't react on it as he heard patients who die slowly, donating all of 'his' organs until his time come.

"It's rare to meet someone who chooses to die that way, though," Emmeline had said one day. "Others or stupider mostly choose a wrong way, such as stab themselves, jump out of the building six feet away and-- oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to say that seriously! I--"

"It's okay." It still hard for Myung Soo to raise his voice up - in case he needs them - as his throat feels like drying every time he does that.

Moon Soo comes rarer after that as the first operation done. He has to divide his time to work at night shift and school at the same time.

"Dad still didn't find a suit job ?"

"No. Nah, what to do with him. Unless it's a job that paid up by girl's body he would never come home and them 24/7." Myung Soo giggles at that. ".. And mom still acting like a fool. Like something doesn't happen between them but knew ing well."

Dongwoo is still has a hard time to visit him. Not that he cares about him but sometimes he would feel something missing as no more Dongwoo's joke, wild laugh, and body gag.

Howon and him doing well. Not so awkward as the first but when Sungjong doesn't come, he always do something weird for Myung Soo's taste - and among them is put his head on Myung Soo's stomach, hand scrolling something on his phone, eyes on the screen and Myung Soo will choose that time to his hair -

--

Myung Soo accepted Howon's 'invitation' without thinking about it twice. 'It just Howon,' he muttered to himself. And if Howon daring to do something at him, he'll probably get kill by Sungjong. He can't live in Sungyeol's house, (No, he won't !) As he - finally - realizes that he was failed to move on.

At first, it's hard to stir Myung Soo's self with Howon's house (It just not so.... Me) as the place that he went as he enters the house was Howon's bedroom, which made Myung Soo wants to paint the new one to replace all of the purple-ness into the actual color.

Myung Soo feels oddly bad enough at Howon, when the older willingly go to Sungyeol's house (abandoned house) and packed his belongings. (untidy, maybe he was in hurry) Myung Soo doesn't come out often, unless it's physio to get his hip straight. And of course, Howon would think that it's suffered Myung Soo, as he can't walk as much as he wants to and Howon was gone for a part-time job in a convenient store nearby - well, he think so - so Howon bought him manhwa. Remember the past which Myung Soo always spent his time with the same manhwa or sometimes novel and simultaneously found out that Myung Soo like reading a lot.

"You doesn't have to buy them, seriously !"

"Nah.. I know how much stress it feels when you can't get out of this boring house."

"You should say: of this boring purple house." And Howon laughs at that, loud. Myung Soo frowned, used that time to check all sets of manhwa Howon had bought.

"By the way, thanks. It such a long time I didn't start reading them again." Howon stops his laughter and smile, while Myung Soo can't help but smiling too.

*

"Howon! Are you okay ?" Myung Soo's eyes widen as he sees an exhausted drunk figure appeared in front of the door. He was sweating badly and can saw Howon's thin clothes was damp from the sweats (sometimes Myung Soo wondered what actually he's working on). Howon was muttered something that Myung Soo can't really hear, but his tone was sad and tired. The older's nose is red, his lips wet and beautiful, his eyes heavy, was about to fall asleep. Without a warning, Howon crawls onto a bed and lying beside Myung Soo, right hand wrapping around Myung Soo's waist and the other on his stomach. Myung Soo shocked. But it's not the first time Howon come home late (and drunk) so he approaches a bit before let out a soft snore. Like usual.

"Hate--" Howon continue muttering. "Work.. Myung Soo-- Gyu.."

*

The light that able to penetrate Howon's eyes and dizziness that he felt was no joke, make his way to wake up but there's somewhat comforting against his clothing torso, so he forced to open his lazy eyes. But before he can think anything else, quickly, he got up from a king-sized bed to run towards his bathroom, vomit.

Leaning his head against the wall, Howon panting hard, appreciate an oxygen in every corner of the bathroom for entering him.

"Here," Myung Soo come suddenly with a glass of water, made Howon widening his eyes.

"Thanks." Howon drink, his throat doesn't feel as good as it should be. "You were shocking me." Myung Soo doesn't reply but just smiles, take a few pieces of Howon's hair to the back of his ear.

"So, what's wrong ?" Howon shook his head, busying himself with the water on his grip. "As expected, why it's hard just to tell me the right thing? I'm your friend right ?"Howon shook his head again, this time not facing Myung Soo. The younger sighs, a long one, then leans his head against the wall copying Howon. "I miss my boyfriend."

"The late one ?"

"No. This one.. He's still alive. But.. It's such a long time I didn't meet him, even chat him.. He is just... So busy."

"Oh. The one that you called 'Source-of-guilty-towards-Sungyeol-or-whatever-his-name-was '?" Myung Soo nods and there's a short silence. "Has tried to text him ?"

"Nope."

"So, that's the problem! You didn't text him when he doesn't have a time to start it !" Howon's tone was confident, telling Myung Soo to believe on him. But instead of a response, Myung Soo stays silent again.

"It's hard to believe right ?" Myung Soo shifts his position as his hip start to grow some pain. "Anyone that sees my situation might think that I'm beloved from Sungyeol, completely beloved. But not, actually not."

"Of course it's easy! Anyone easily believes that handsome person like you have more than one boyfriend !" Myung Soo hits Howon's shoulder, hard.

"Quickly flush that toilet! The smell got stronger." As Myung Soo struggles to stand up, Howon reaches his arm, help him to stand up properly after flushes the toilet.

*

Myung Soo has a hard time to move right and left in his bed as his hips still aren't completely straight, yet. And Howon, which Myung Soo is completely feeling bad to, accompany him, all the time. There's a time when Myung Soo, weirdly, happy to have someone (silently) 'promise' to take a really good care of him. So, when his body started to numb because of unmoved position, he had to wake Howon up to help him turn his body over. And yet, Howon still doesn't give an angry groan of replied or oblige with his need. Somehow, Howon becomes his source of comfortable and Myung Soo feel guilty about that. Towards.. Yeah, you know?

'Hyung, bring back some packs of sugar yes? I think we were run out if it.' Myung Soo texts Howon one day. After almost a full hour of waiting for a reply, he decided to eat a bowl of cereal that keep neatly in his (Howon's) cabinet. It's not a first-time Howon doesn't reply his message, but somehow, Myung Soo feels a little tiny of disappointment but ignored them. Suddenly, his phone buzz as a sign that someone is calling him, and when he checked the ID caller, it was Moon Soo.

"Hello ?" Moon Soo takes the first step first. Myung Soo wonders what happened to Moon Soo beforehand, as he heard his lazy voice coming out from his phone's speaker.

"Moon Soo, it's me. What's wro--"

"Did you attend it ?"

"What ?"

"The Stories On Circle, did you attend it ?" Myung Soo's mind finally registered what is Moon Soo talking about. A short silence. "Hyung ?"

"Oh, that.. I.. Is it already started ?"

"Don't you read the date? It's 12 March, hyung. It's over yesterday !" Moon Soo's voice almost a shout.

"What? I don't get it, Moon Soo slow down." His little brother sighs.

"The main point is.. Stories On Circle is good, good enough to make you forget about the...What the damn name was it ?"

"Lee SungYeol and he's not a damn." An extraordinary anger comes from Myung Soo's heart slowly.

"Yeah, whatever. And what's next? Were you planning something beside of that?"

"Look, Moon Soo. My hips didn't get straight enough to make me walk properly and I--"

"Job? Did Woohyun had promoted something? A job that related to your--" Myung Soo hangs up the phone, feel annoyed of his brother act. He has started showing his true color again, and Myung Soo doesn't even know how to let out a word that will make the younger speechless. He had a search, of course, but what came up is not what Myung Soo want. (How to make your boyfriend/girlfriend speechless and Myung Soo immediately close the tab) After watched television for almost 2 hours, Myung Soo decided to throw his whole body on the bed. He sighs after found himself keep staring at the ceiling.

He should have ignored that feeling and everything will be fine.

He should have to know what Sungyeol wanted and everything will be alright.

He should have lived with someone right now and not his ex-crush.

Sometimes, he feels like a complete loser when found himself that he is slowly moving on. ('And so what? You will spend the rest of your life with Sungyeol's shadow? All the time?'/'Yes') he silently answers himself. And that words haunting his mind every time he thinks of another man, even a girl.

 He expected that Howon will come home drunk today but it's not. His body, strangely and unexpectedly, shot up by a bunch of excitement. There's a pack of sugar that Myung Soo ordered in the plastic bag he's holding, but there are a few of bottles beside it.

"We missed a few of days together. So, I guess.. We could have a drink?"

Myung Soo brings two wine cup and put it on a small table right in front of Howon while the older had done opened the cover of Viognier in his hand. They had a small talk and finally, Myung Soo knows what job Howon worked on. ("What? You don't know? How could you--"/"Nah.. Forget it.") Slowly, Myung Soo's mind barely thinks straight.

Howon sighs. A long one. Sigh that you used to grab other's attention or to have a mercy. Myung Soo stops sipping his wine and looked up.

"Listen. If we keep going on with these, it's mean that we'll never be 'farther than I want', okay? I--"

"Don't understand," Myung Soo said and continue his stunt action just now. Like conversation that they 'will' have later is unimportant.

"Myung Soo. Look at me." Howon gripped both Myung Soo's shoulder gently. "These.... Just listen. Things that I going to tell you might drive you crazy, or ended up in Dignitas or whatever it was. Might giving your whole body.. Or organ.. to the hospital. Just listen, and things that I mentioned... Just.. Not to do them. Okay?" Then.. Myung Soo's brain finally can register word by word and slowly nod. "Good.. Okay.. Listen.. I know what you're going to think might be--" then, Myung Soo's mind can't register anything anymore. Just.. The feeling got so strong Myung Soo can't hold it in.

His heartbeat faster.

A big of disappointment rose up from his heart when Howon's eyes looked away.

His eyes can't let go the sight of Howon.

And then, don't know what might control him at that time, he leans against Howon, breaking the distance between their lips. Howon got extraordinary shocked. Of course, the topic that was supposed to talk about wasn't these, and if he able to think straight, he'll push Myung Soo right away and tell him that it's wrong.

'But it just Myung Soo. The guy who already having his heart broken. Why not for the second time?' Then, Howon kissed back. Don't know what landed on his head that night, but his hand makes their way towards Myung Soo's torso and able to reach what he wanted. Myung Soo's moan as he felt the squeezed on his right . They kiss. And it's getting passionate.

Without Myung Soo realized, he had crossed the line.

Hot that he never feel of make he opened his lazy eyes and looked around. He needed to adjust his eyes to the high quality of light first before seeing a piece of note.

'Take a shower if you needed to. And get out of my house.'

"Damn it!" Myung Soo swore when he got no answer from the call. He almost wants to cry but the thought of he's old enough to do that had him able to hold his tears. He tries a second chance again.

No answers. He repeats again.

"Hello?" Finally. He sniffs.

"H.. Hello. I'm Myung--"

"I know darling. How are you?" It's not topic that Myung Soo though of. He starting to sob. "Soo? You're okay?"

"Can you help me.. Just this once.. And I promise I'll leave when I got better."

"H- Help? What? Of course, I can. Anything! What do you want sweetheart?"

"I want to live in your flat. Just.. This once.. I lost my flat--"

"Yes, you may. And please, don't leave too soon."

"Thank God. Thanks, Sunggyu. I-- Oh My God.. Thanks, Lord-"

"Anything darling. Where are you now?".

Myung Soo takes a final step first. And there he is.

"Wow." Was the first word he muttered. "This place.. Changed a lot."

"Yeah, I made them. When you're away for the job, I take that time to change it. And I found out that you nowhere to be found." Myung Soo smiles, full of apologetically. "Don't give me that look." Sunggyu chuckles. Then, he steps towards Myung Soo, quickly. The younger found out that he has been kissed. Lovely. "Forget the past. Just don't make the same mistakes. I love you and I always do. Okay?"

Then, Myung Soo knows that he has to restart his life again.

Sunggyu's house changed. Myung Soo notices a lot but there's a place that Myung Soo don't want them to change. And that's it. A big field. There are a tree and bushes everywhere.

"Corn! You still keep them?" Sunggyu laughs, a fake one.

"Of course, why would I want to throw them away?" A short silence. "This 'memory card' had kept the most moment of us together, and it has a big storage. It's such a waste even I pluck one single leave."

There's a time when Myung Soo secretly or for more detail, silently crying. When the stars start to light up his room, with Sunggyu beside him make him hard to breathe normally. It's not love. He knew. And promise himself will run out of this house after got a result from Richard through email, a sign that he got a new job.

 He had forgotten his hips' condition which why they have 'some' . They eat together. Even washing dishes side by side. They do everything together and Myung Soo promised himself to not believe in anyone else. Including Sunggyu no matter what he had done for him.

So there are a thousand reasons why Myung Soo avoided to answer Sunggyu's question when the older asked about their relationship. He doesn't tell Sunggyu (a.k.a his mate) as he doesn't have a right to know.

Sunggyu coming home earlier than it supposed to be that day. Myung Soo doesn't question him why and create his own thought.

"Do you like to have some tea?" He asked from the kitchen. Myung Soo doesn't get a reply and repeat it again, in case Sunggyu don't hear him. No reply but instead a figure himself come in, with a new white coat he bought last week.

"No, thanks. And I want to go out, for a while. Can you tidy up my cupboard? They got messy from last night and I think it's Jin Young's dog that shown up again."

"Going where? Can you hold up tonight? I have something to tell--"

"Sorry but I can't. It's some of office ing meeting and I need to be there before past nine."

"Right after work? Why don't you guys make it up early?" Myung Soo found out that he was frustrated and instead he gives no room for Sunggyu to answer. "What? Are you taking your time to make love with Howon and have some drink and got yourself bloody drunk? And release all of your lust on me?"

"Myung Soo-- what? I don't understand?"

"Don't you ing pretend to not know anything! Howon is your boyfriend and I'm bloody sure of that! How did I know? Go ask your beloved boyfriend! On how we HAD A FUN ING TIME and his mouth was mentioning something and finally the word 'Sunggyu' escaped his tongue. CLEARLY!"

"Myung Soo! What the hell are you talking about? I've no one except you in this world! And I--"

"Nice acts old man. But sorry, I'm not an innocent kid who just knew how the heartbreak was and how--"

Or maybe Myung Soo's eyes has a very slow action that he can't catch that hand moving on him. Or maybe the action was too fast for his eyes to catch them. But he seems not knowing how creepy the Old-Man guy was, and how the hand that always him from the start of his hair and make their way down, that always working fast whoever he said he's starving or sick or numb leg, and finally that hand activate to punch him in the face, twice.

"Beware of your word Kim Myung Soo." His voice was calm but hoarse, like he just woke up from his coma or whatever logically. And then he was gone.

Myung Soo started to collect all of his belongings again, for the third time in his life. Throwing hard onto the ground which not his and just shoved them down his backpack if the clothing was too big and make it messy when he folds them. The phone buzzed. He picks it up after the third time and forgot to check who the caller ID was. But it's woman's voice.

"This is Kim Myung Soo?" What a straightforward person...

"Ah, yes. What's"

"Please come to the Alchemilla Hospital. Your brother needs you." Myung Soo eyes widen. The frustration comeback.

"What? I-- My brother? What happened to him?"

"Was shot twice. He's lucky he able to stop bleeding since we took him into the ambulance. He's out of intensive care-- ."

Myung Soo hanged up the phone. Moon Soo... Has been shot? Doesn't even change his cloth, he grab the car keys that owned by Sunggyu and take them outside. Starting the engine as he got himself easily in that Mercedes. He didn't check who the number was, 'perhaps it Moon Soo's..' The drove towards the hospital was faster than he had ever driven, he started right after finished checking the GPS where the hell that mentioned-hospital was. 'It's around here. It's not too far.'

Myung Soo was panting hard as he filled the doorways. Then, continue his steps towards the counter.

"Is... Some.. Someone, a new patient had been shoot by the gun.. Entering here?" The woman checks something on her monitor.

"Ah, yes. A guy?"

"Right. Where he is?!"

"In the operation room. You have to wait outside there until they--"

"Where is the Operation Room?!" Shocked on how Myung Soo's voice raising up, she quickly leads Myung Soo to the room, instructed him to wait until they take the patient out and placing them in the private room. Want it or not, Myung Soo has to obey, so he takes a seat on the plastic chair and cries.

Phone buzzed. He doesn't have a time to pick up anyway. Then, his phone rang, a sign that he just got a new message. He takes a look anyway.

MoonSoo: Why don't you pick up my call?

MoonSoo: Hyung. Mom wants you to come home

MoonSoo: I knew it's ing strange but just come home. They're all missing you.

MoonSoo: Where are you?

It then his head finally registered what was happening. MoonSoo, who he assumed to have an operation right now, texting him. He doesn't reply but calling him instead.

"Hyung.."

"MoonSoo?"

"Yeah, it's me. So, when do you think you can come?"

"MoonSoo... It.. It's you? I thought.. Soo.. What are happening?"

"Hyung, you okay? Are you having a dream? It sounds like you just woke up from your sleep--" his phone went off.

"Dammit!" He ran to the counter again, asking the woman who the named new patient was.

"It's.... Kim Sung Gyu."

×××

Myung Soo raises his head from buried them in his crossed-arm. He can feel his temple was sweating badly, like he just done some of the wrestling thing several rounds with Cho Sung Hoon. He's panting hard. It's not long until someone giggles.

"Look at his face!" And then Woohyun burst laughing. He has his grip on his stomach, indigestion maybe.

"Yah~ you guys has a great collaboration huh? Just now Sungyeol just made some dull joke and now it's you make some clown-liked-face!" It's Sungjong. Then, on his front seat sat a guy, his beloved ones and the one that was the main character in his dream. He looked at him with concerned eyes.

"You okay?" There's his voice, manly and beautiful. Myung Soo nodded. "You were cried. Let me take you to the bathroom. You need to wash your face." There's his touch, soft and smooth with that clear skin. So, Myung Soo following him to the bathroom while silently hoping that Sungyeol doesn't let go of his hand. "Finish? Doesn't need to pee or something?" Myung Soo shakes his head. He thinks he had lost his word and voice.

And there they were. That voice was cheery and cracking as the other still teasing the younger one.

"Yah.. What the hell this old guy-- come here!" Howon continues chasing Sunggyu outside the bathroom. He saw them. He saw them through the reflection from the mirror in front of him.

Myung Soo's eyes were wide, like a puppy found out that his father had been killed. He's still looking the guy in front of him.

"Soo? What's wrong? Anything alright?"

"Yes.." Then there's a long pause. Suddenly, other's hand are wrapping his waist slowly while Myung Soo's hand already around Sungyeol's neck. And that's it. They kissed. He once again falling in love with Sungyeol's skillful tongue and that wet lips, kissing like there's no tomorrow.

And Myung Soo knows he is and always loving this guy forever.