After Ten spent about an hour at Taeyong’s dorm room, he remembered it was time for him to go to his own dorm room and finish any work due for tomorrow.

On his way back he ran into someone he least wanted. When Ten caught a glimpse of him waving his way he couldn’t help but scoff

“Ten Hyung!” Yugeom waved marching in front of him “Hey, I haven’t seen you since the party. Did you enjoy it?”

“Uh- Yea, I did.” Ten showed him a half smile. “Listen, I still have something to do Geom. I’ll see you around.”

“Ten-hyung! Wait.” Yugeom caught hold of Ten’s shoulder which Ten brush off almost immediately which caused Yugeom to frown “Ten?”

Ten let out a heavy sigh, he had just about enough of the younger. “Yugeom, I’m sorry. I’m sorry but I can’t do this, I acknowledge your perseverance but I can’t ever return your feelings. I know you don’t have any bad intentions but I’m bothered by you trying. It’s enough you admire me with my dancing but I’m not even sure why you admire me as a person. If you look closely there’s nothing quite interesting about me. I’m sorry for wasting your time but I can’t ever live with myself of holding such a valuable thing from you.”

If Yugeom was confused earlier he was more confused now. He didn’t understand why Ten was doubting himself, he almost thought that Ten hated his company so much he would result to lying about self-doubt, but it was the sincerity in his eyes that seemed to always be present indicating the passion Ten puts in everything he does that made him understand. He didn’t know why he fell for Ten in the first place, he thought it was just pure admiring for his dancing but then Ten’s personality was like the sun radiating heat in the otherwise cold world. If he was to be asked, he didn’t want to fall for Ten, he didn’t choose too but that’s the thing about love, you can’t really decide who you want to fall for it just happens, but what hurts Yugeom more was that Ten himself couldn’t see his own beauty. He couldn’t even feel what he’s making others feel. It’s as if the happiness Ten brings to people is an equivalent to his own self-destruction.

The younger of the two had tears in his eyes by now, not because of what Ten told him but because he couldn’t do anything what Ten was feeling and he hated himself for that even if he knows it’s not his responsibility, it feels like it is.

Ten noticed the tears falling from Yugeom’s eyes and Ten rushed closer to him trying to wipe them off but Yugeom pushed his hand away that made Ten’s eyes be tainted with guilt. “I-I’m so sorry Geom, I didn’t –“

“No!” Yugeom pushed back Ten’s hands again “I don’t care if you can’t return my feeling for you, just please promise me you won’t see yourself like that. You’re worth every admiration everyone is giving you hyung."

Ten was left speechless as Yugeom walked on the opposite direction. He couldn’t believe what the latter said and he felt like he didn’t deserve what Yugeom said.

Through his walk back to his dorm room, Ten was silently contemplating, not just with what Yugeom said but Yugeom and any other person whom admired him until he stopped in front of him and Johnny’s shared dorm room. He stared for it for 5 seconds till it occurred to him that he needed to unlock the door for him to enter. He heaved a breathy sigh as he enters and walked slowly to his room.

“Hey Debby Downer, what’s wrong?” a shirtless Johnny who was watching cartoons in the lounge greeted him “or should I say Tenny Downer” he looked at Ten with an open mouthed smile waiting for a reaction to which Ten just groaned before plopping next to him on the sofa

“Okay seriously” Johnny faced the younger “what’s wrong?”

“It’s Yugeom.”

“Why? Did you guys break up?”

“What? We weren’t even together in the first place!.”

“But he likes you right?”

“well, yeah.”

“hang on, did you even like him in the first place?”

“I-“ Ten wanted to say he did for the sake of Yugeom but he didn’t see the point in lying “No.”

“Yet you let him do all those couple things to you?” Johnny scoffed “seriously Ten, you’re too good for your own kind.”

Ten didn’t understand. What was he expected to do? Push Yugeom away. Yugeom was his friend before he liked Ten. He only thought Yugeom was being friendly after all friendship comes first before anything else, even feelings.

~

Taeyong woke with the scent of the hospital filling his lungs. He tried to move but failed miserably. It’s as if simple actions were restricted by an endless sleep. Taeyong was struggling to move until someone called his name.

“Taeyong-ah!” Yuta called for the latter.

Taeyong’s eyes shot open and gasped in air as if it was restricted from entering his body.

“You okay?” Yuta asked placing a hand on Taeyong’s shoulder.

He looked around taking in where he was. He was at the lab working on his thesis; he must’ve fell asleep. Yuta met his eyes and Taeyong was in shock

“Yuta!” Taeyong exclaimed in realization “I haven’t seen you since yesterday”

“That’s because  I wasn’t here yesterday.” Yuta said frankly “What’d I miss anyway?”

“Well,” Taeyong starts “You know that Thai from Yugeom’s party?”

“Bambam?”

“No!” Taeyong groaned “The one Bambam introduced, Ten.”

“Okay… so?”

“He sat in this class yesterday, and I got to hang out with him. Jaehyun, Doyoung and Taeil have met him too.”

“I’m sorry how does this concern me?.”

Taeyong ignored Yuta’s rather rude tone and just shrugged it off

“It doesn’t I’m just telling you what you’ve missed since you asked”

Yuta was taken aback, he didn’t expect Taeyong’s sudden cold outburst. It was the least he expected from the latter. Everyone may think Taeyong is that stoic, cold hearted pessimist but Yuta knows far too well what’s behind Taeyong’s cold exterior, maybe that’s why he fell for him in the first place. After 4 years of knowing each other he came to know that every time Taeyong puts his guard up he’s only protecting someone behind it. But who could he be defending this time?

“Do you like Ten?” Yuta suddenly asked

“What?” Taeyong was taken aback “What do you mean I like Ten?”

“I don’t know… do you like him in any way at all?”

“Well, Yeah.” Taeyong sighed “I can’t seem to fathom his physicality. I find him too attractive and I don’t understand why. So, I guess in that way I like him but at the same time he’s great to be around. He kind of reminds me of my mother.”

Taeyong never mentioned his mother before but Yuta knows what happened to her. He was with Taeyong when his world w