Author: house-laurie

Requested by: reginadjww

Genre: Angst 

OTP/Group: Changkyun/Hyunwoo (I.M/Shownu) / Monsta X

Word count: 3,118

VIP: No

?: Yes

In between constant promotions, dance practices, and the occasional interview with a showcaster who was less than interested in what they had to say (and probably only pretended to care because they’d lose their job if they didn’t), it had been increasingly difficult for Changkyun to find time to hang out with Hyunwoo. They didn’t have to do much in order to chill -- he was fine with just sitting on his hyung’s bed in the room he shared with Kihyun and not exchanging a word with the elder -- but as Monsta X started to get more popular, that unfortunately meant they had less time for themselves.

Everything from complaining about dance practice to cuddling and even , something they only engaged in when the others weren’t at home because Changkyun was a screamer, as much as he didn’t want to admit it, had dwindled into nothing over the past few weeks. They didn’t even have time to exchange a quick hug or a kiss on the cheek (or even a kiss on the lips behind closed doors and in darkened rooms).

They had time for absolutely nothing and it scared him.

What if they were drifting apart? What if this was the end?

The thought alone makes Changkyun’s heart ache as if somebody has grabbed a hold of the organ nestled in his chest and has started squeezing it, hard enough to drain it completely of all the blood it has. It hurts, feeling as if a storm of bullets has ripped through him or maybe even his heart was torn from his chest and stomped on by somebody wearing spiked boots.

, that’s really sappy but it also accurately describes how he feels.

And it’s that same desperation that brings Changkyun to Hyunwoo’s room, which he shared with Kihyun, who was currently out with the others, leaving Changkyun alone in the dorm with his oldest hyung. They need to talk and he knows this but it bothers him that he’s the one being forced to address the problem.

“Hyung?” he mumbles, rapping his knuckles on the wood of the door and not even that, lacking so much energy that it feels as if he’s completely lost control of his body.

“Oh, hey, ‘Kyun,” Hyunwoo says casually, voice almost in a croon as he acknowledges the maknae’s presence and the nickname he utters nearly has enough gravity to send Changkyun tumbling to the floor in a sobbing heap.

But as much as he would love to curl up under mounds of blankets and never come out, the desire to confront his leader was stronger than the desire to hide.

“Do you hate me?”

“Kyunnie, why do you think that?” Hyunwoo asks, sliding off the bed before making his way over to the maknae, hands finding their way onto Changkyun’s shoulders.

“Because…”

“Because? You can talk to me if something is bothering you.”

“It’s stupid,” Changkyun grumbles.

“It’s definitely not stupid if you’re upset,” Hyunwoo insists, leading him over to his bed so they could sit face-to-face, and it’s now that the maknae really finds himself stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Does he ignore his leader and go to his own room so he could wallow in self pity or just look the problem right in the face -- meaning looking Hyungwoo right in the eye like he was his worst enemy or something like that, though it couldn’t be farther from the truth because just being around Hyunwoo made his heart pound like he was experiencing an adrenaline high -- or it up and tell Hyunwoo exactly what was on his mind, no holds barred. Neither option seems all that favorable but Changkyun knows which one he’d pick and he’s not a coward, that’s for sure. When he finally gains the courage to speak, the first thing that leaves his mouth is,

“We need to talk,” and Hyunwoo nods to show his cooperation.

“Okay, about what?”

Here goes nothing.

Hyunwoo wasn’t the impulsive or hotheaded type yet Changkyun found himself debating his approach. Should he just spit it out or gently ease into what he wanted to discuss or--

“You’ve been ignoring me.”

Immediately, Hyunwoo utters an apology but it only makes Changkyun feel worse since an apology is not what he desires. Really, he doesn’t know what he wants from Hyunwoo. An apology was all he could hope to get, knowing that his hyung wasn’t really the type to kiss even if he was the one at fault but the blame wasn’t his to bear, not in its entirety, anyways.

It wasn’t his fault they were getting more popular as a group or that promotions of any kind took up a lot of time out of their schedules.

After all, there were only twenty-four hours in a day, eight of which an average person spent sleeping and leaving less than sixteen hours left to do everything that a person both needed to do, such as running errands and buying groceries, as well as participating in activities of pleasure such as going out to watch a movie or staying home and playing video games. Given the amount of free time they had as idols with hectic schedules, twenty-four hours just weren’t enough to accomplish everything they set out to do.

“It’s not entirely your fault,” the maknae mumbles. “It’s just… I was hoping we’d spend time together since we don’t have any schedules for the next couple of days but you’ve barely even looked at me.”

“I’m really sorry about that,” Hyunwoo apologizes, placing his hand on the younger’s shoulder. “Is there some way I can fix this? Maybe make you feel better? I know we’re all really busy but if you ”

This is your chance, the maknae thinks excitedly, boldly locking eyes with his hyung. This is your chance, Changkyun!

Rather than speak, he holds out his arms, as if asking his hyung for a hug and his heart skips a beat when his leader tugs on his wrists, guiding him into his lap until he’s cuddled up with his head resting against the elder’s shoulder.

Like this, he can smell his hyung’s clean scent as well as his heavy cologne, something he found himself craving for a long time. Before today, he had only caught tiny whiffs of it for the past few weeks just in passing and it had nearly driven him insane. The maknae hums happily when he feels his leader rubbing circles into his back, clinging to the elder even as he lays down so his back is against the pillows.

“Do you feel better now, baby?” Hyunwoo croaks in his ear and something about that pet name, which is so unfamiliar to his ears, makes Changkyun’s cheeks burn red with embarrassment.

“Yeah, a little,” he admits.

“What else can I do to make you happy?”

“Kiss me?”

Rather than hear a response from Hyunwoo, Changkyun feels a gentle hand guiding his face so he's no longer got his face hidden in his leader's shoulder and he finds himself staring into clear, dark pools that shimmer with lust as well as something much more gentle. It almost looks like love but it’s been so long since they last sat like this or cuddled or even just breathed in each other’s air that the emotion looks almost unfamiliar to the maknae. But when Hyunwoo cups his chin and suddenly leans in, his thick, pouty lips capturing the younger’s for a chaste kiss, Changkyun’s mind goes completely blank.

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