~ Chanyeol's POV

I snap awake when my alarm clock starts screaming on the night stand on my left hand side. I slam it with my open palm, and it shuts off. I sigh and my upper body up from the mattress covered in soft, white sheets. "Think happy thoughts", I whisper to myself and close my eyes for a moment to dream about cute little bunnies, kittens in teacups, puppies playing with something flowy and of course, one of the most genius inventions of mankind, chocolate. I smile a little and get up, today's going to be a good day. I'm going to make it so.

I walk to the kitchen in my pajamas, turn the lights on and crack open a few eggs and some bacon onto a hot frying pan. I grab my cellphone from the counter where it was charging overnight, and start browsing the news from last night. A suspicious headline catches my eye.

"A mysterious wildfire outside of Seoul last night - an arson?"

I click the article open and read the story's description, since the actual article is way too long. I take a quick look at the artsy picture of a lighter against a black background and some statistics about fires. "Thank God I wasn't on shift last night", I mumble and put down the cellphone. I rub my temples a little and turn back to the stove when my breakfast starts burning. I grab a small plate from the overhead cabinet and carefully lift the breakfast on it with the spatula. I sigh and sit down by the table, facing the huge window. It's still pretty dark outside, but the town is already waking up. I smile a little and turn on the radio on the crammed shelf next to me, I feel weird just sitting in silence by myself. A calming, acoustic song is playing. It sounds familiar, and I hum quietly along while eating.

After I've finished breakfast, brushed my teeth, showered and changed into dark blue jeans and an off-white shirt, I pull on a long black coat and step outside. It's still early in the morning, but the sun is slowly rising, piercing through the morning fog and giving the street a rosy glow. I shuffle deeper into my jacket and jump into my car, taking a deep breath. I start the engine and look at the small clock on the dashboard. I bite the inside of my lower lip gently, thinking about whether or not I would have enough time to check out the fire site before going to work. I turn my keys in the lock and the engine starts. I head towards the forest that was in the news.

I pull over by the road when the trees on my right side start turning black. I get out of the car and look around. I slam the door closed and take a few steps towards the forest. I take in the sight of tall trees, now reduced to their bare trunks, the smell of ash and smoke mixed with the wet fog, creating a confusing sensation, and the sound of charred sticks on the ground as I walk in deeper. I look up at the sky burning in orange and pink tones; it creates a beautiful contrast with the black trees. After the sad realization that my camera isn't here with me, I settle to taking a quick picture with my cellphone. I look around and take a few more - this forest seems perhaps even more enchanting than buildings. I can hear slow steps behind me and quickly turn around to see a small figure appear from behind the thick wall of fog.

"Kai?" I ask and the person stops. I walk closer and recognize the face. A smile spreads on my lips. "You have an obsession with this stuff, too?" I ask him. Either my eyes are still seeing things after sleeping so well, or he flinches a little at my question. He shrugs a little and finally walks closer. Our eyes meet, and I don't think I've realized earlier just how terribly tired he looks. "Are you... Okay?" I ask and a he nods with a smile. "Wow, you're smiling! That's... Actually kind of creepy", I mumble and look at his eyes. "I'm fine, Chanyeol. But you should know... My name..." he says with a voice so quiet, I can hardly hear it. "My name is actually Baekhyun", he mumbles and looks away, the smile fading away. "Oh? Why would you lie to m..." I cut myself short. If movies and books have thought me anything, it's that people who lie about their names are not to be trusted. "Seriously, are you okay? You seem tired and... Hungry", I say and look at his body. He hugs his torso and shakes his head. "No. I'm not okay", he whispers. My eyes widen a little. This is getting creepy. "Okay. Well. Uhhh..." I scratch the back of my head. "Do you want to tell me? What's not okay?" I answer calmly and look at his eyes. Small, shiny pools of tears are forming underneath them, even though there is a smile on his lips again. My hand is itching, wanting to reach out and wipe them away. He shakes his head and looks away from me. "Who would you like to tell?" I ask and he shakes his head again. "You don't want to tell anyone? Why?" I ask again and bite my lip. I shouldn't be asking so many questions. "Because they're going to hurt me", he whispers and looks up at me, letting his hands drop to his sides. I take a moment to think of something to say. "Don't worry. No one is going to hurt you", I promise and flash a small smile. "You liar!" Baekhyun suddenly screams out and a flock of birds fly off from a tree next to us. He starts running away, but this time, I don't let him get away. "Baekhyun!" I scream and start running behind him.

We run for a while. My feet are hurting and my lungs are burning, but right as I start to slow down, Baekhyun falls down on his stomach on the path a few feet ahead of me. "Oh ", I mumble and run next to him, kneeling on the ground. He pulls his limbs underneath himself and breathes in short, rapid breaths. "Are you okay?" I ask him - idiot, of course he's not okay. His body is shaking and tiny sobs come out of his mouth. "", I whimper, too scared to even lay a hand on him. "Sh-should I call an ambulance?" I ask. "NO!" he screams and gets up quickly, backing against a tree. He sits on the ground with his legs close to his body. I walk to him slowly, crouch down and look him in the eyes. "Baekhyun. Look at me", I say to him calmly and he looks up. His eyes are filled with nothing but panic. If eyes could talk, his would be screaming. "You're safe. You're okay", I say quietly and he seems to calm down a bit. I build up the courage and lay my hand on his own hand, not holding it yet. He jumps to my lap, startling me at first, but I slowly wrap my arms around him and try to hold him up. "I'm sorry if I scared you. I'm just worried", I whisper and pet his hair slowly. His body shakes less every moment, and his breathing gets more stable. After a surprisingly long while, he gets out of my lap and stands up, looking at his feet. I get up.

"Hey, Baekhyun? I need to go to work." He nods and shifts between his feet. I'm probably already late, but the other shift is not leaving before everyone from the other shift, including me, has arrived, and this is important. "Can you give me your hand?" I ask and follow Baekhyun's eyes as he looks up with confusion before holding out his left hand. "I want to give you my number. So you... So you can call me", I say and take out a small marker from my pocket, scribbling the number on the back of his hand quickly. "You don't have to call. But please trust me. We can get you help", I say softly and smile. He nods. "Come on. I want to make sure you find your way home", I mumble and motion to the path where we came from. He starts walking, and I follow him. I would follow him for as long as he wants me to.

Baekhyun tells me to stop the car at the corner store. The light gray blinds are down and the lights are out, but the owner will probably come back in a few weeks to open up the store again. I pull over and we get out of the black car, and that's when I stop to take a better look at Baekhyun. His dark eyes are calmer now, but behind the first glance, there's deep sorrow, worry, maybe. His pink lips open a little when he breathes out. He's wrapped his arms around his torso tightly to stay warm, and his legs are shaking a little, in fact, so is his entire body. "You're freezing", I mumble and hug him slowly, to give him time to back away. He doesn't. He stays still, and I hold his trembling, cold body gently. "So where do you live?" I ask slowly and look him in the eyes. "Nearby. I don't want you to know", he whispers and rests against me, closing his eyes. I nod a little and smile to myself when he shuffles closer to me, and when he places his hands between our chests.

A pair of strong hands pulls us apart, and another pair pushes me back. "Get off him!" a loud voice shouts to me and shoves me further away. "No, it's okay..." I hear Baekhyun complain. "Sehun! Don't touch him!" Baekhyun suddenly screams and the person in front of me turns around to look at him. I look at the other man, who has darker skin than his friends. He's hugging Baekhyun tight. There's a weird look on his face, as if he recognizes mine. But to me, he's a complete stranger. "It's... It's okay.  He wasn't hurting me. I'm fine", he says quietly and looks at his friends. They nod a little and the man named Sehun backs away. "Sorry", I mumble for some reason, shouldn't they be the ones apologizing? "Come on. We need to get you home", Baekhyun's other friend, whose name is still unknown to me, says. They start walking away, and I turn to my car and jump in, I'm really ing late.

~ Baekhyun's POV

"Okay... First of all. Was that... Chanyeol?" Jongin asks with disbelief in his voice and looks at me with huge, round eyes and takes a deep breath when I nod. "Second of all, what's wrong?" he asks and I look at him for a moment. "I... Panic attack. But... He was there with me and... It made me feel better", I whisper and look down at the street, and my feet occasionally appearing in the bottom of my view. I already know what Jongin and Sehun are thinking.

My panic attacks are uncontrollable, and there's never stopping them. If anyone tries to touch me, I slap them away with a scream. The feeling of fingers on my skin when I'm in that state freaks me out. But why is Chanyeol so different? I don't understand why someone who I barely even know would be able to touch me, let alone hold me and, the most baffling thing of all, make me calm down. His body felt so big and warm and safe, his shirt was soft and his arms felt like they would easily catch me if I fell down, which wouldn't have surprised me. Chanyeol. Even his name feels to flow so easily, like his name is shaped perfectly to slip out from between my lips. His lips are pink and full. Not thick, but full, and pretty. And his eyes are big and happy and his gaze holds me in place, making it difficult to look away. His deep voice is beautiful and peaceful. I close my eyes for a second to just imagine him saying calming things to my ears, and his long arms wrapping around me, petting my back just from the right place.

I shake my head quickly and look up at our house. The place seems sadder than usual, even when the morning sunlight has filled the air. We rush inside the dim, cold building. Sehun lets out a long, relieved sigh and starts walking to our beds with his hands in his pockets. Jongin and I follow him and we sit down on our own beds, Sehun in the middle. I tug at a small piece of string sticking out of my sheets and wonder if I'll meet Chanyeol again. "What's that?" Jongin asks and points at the back of my hand, where there's a series of numbers scribbled in Chanyeol's handwriting. "His phone number. He's worried", I say quietly and smile in my mind. I could get help. I could get better. I could find a phone booth and call him.

"When did you leave? We didn't hear you. And why the hell would you leave alone?" Sehun says and looks at me with concern. That's the difference between them, Jongin and Sehun. Jongin is calm, he's a worried mother who hugs and makes sure his babies have had enough before eating his own food. Sehun is more like a father, sometimes he seems mad, but deep down, he's just mad at himself for letting his kids stay outside until 9pm. Then he blames himself when the kids get colds. I shake my head a little. "I don't know. I just needed some alone time. At... 4am or something", I say silently and run my fingertips over the black numbers on my hand. I really should call.

~ Chanyeol's POV

"Chanyeol?" Yifan asks and I look up from the paperwork we're trying to organize upstairs in the archive. "Did you hear about that fire last night?" he asks and I nod shortly, turning my eyes back to the endlessly boring words on white paper. "I went to check the forest out this morning. That's why I was late", I mumble and set down the papers, rubbing my forehead a little. "I'm going to get us some coffee, okay? Be right back", I mumble and step out of the room. My mind wanders it's way back to Baekhyun.

I'm getting more and more concerned for him. My mind starts to make up stories as to why he would act the way he did, but it doesn't help the fact that even if I want to protect him, he still creeps me out in some ways. I tap my cellphone in my pocket and check to make sure he hasn't called, or that it's definitely on and would ring if Baekhyun happened to call. I do this more than twice on my way to the break room and the coffee maker.

What worries me more than it should is the fact that every time we meet, there's something there related to fire. We've met at a bar and a forest that were burnt down, and once I found him in the park burning leaves - and himself. I shake my head a little, close my eyes and rub my scalp, he's making me worry a lot, more than I've worried about pretty much anything. And the relation to fire...

My head starts hurting.

Smoke is filling my lungs.

I can't breathe, but he's right there. If only I could...

I fall on the floor and my body stops moving.

No. Get up...

Get up...

I can't.

But he's right ing there, DO SOMETHING!

"Chanyeol!" Joonmyun screams and I open my eyes. When did it get so bright in here? "Ahh, ", I cuss when I feel a burning pain on the back of my head. I rub the place with my hand. I'm not bleeding, but the thing hurts like hell. Why am I lying on the floor? I look up at Joonmyun who puts down his cup on the counter and kneels down next to me with a face filled with shock. "Are you okay?" he asks as Yifan rushes to the room and stares at me. "I'm fine! I'm fine", I mumble and get up slowly, leaning on the chair that I probably hit when I fell. I nearly lose my balance, which makes Joonmyun move a little, ready to catch me. "Should you... Are you sure you're fine?" Yifan asks slowly and I nod. "", I whisper to myself and let go of the chair.

I don't want to remember that. All the pain, the guilt, the depressed feeling for months. I shake my head and look at my friends, and smile a little at their concerned looks. "Have you drank enough water? Why did you just fall like that?" Joonmyun asks and feels my forehead. "Uhh. Nothing. I just tripped over my feet", I explain quickly and look at Yifan, who probably knows why I've been acting strange and now... This.

After Joonmyun makes sure I'm physically good, I follow Yifan back to the office and continue with the paperwork. "Do you need a therapist?" Yifan asks quietly, so Joonmyun wouldn't hear this conversation. We look down on the floor. "No. I'm over it. Trust me", I whisper to Yifan and myself. I keep my focus on the papers, unaware of my cellphone that cracked it's speaker and is now ringing silently.

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