There are times when Yunhyeong feels the need of killing himself.

One of them is right now.

“The operation is a success. She’s now still under the anaesthesia effect and can be visited some hours later,” said the doctor, his face was filled with smile.

Yunhyeong, who have been impatiently waiting outside the surgery room, runs to hug his mother and father, crying his heart out in relief.

One of the doctor team members pulls the door from inside of surgery room weakly to face a man that have been walking back and forth in front of the grand doors for hours while waiting his brother’s operation.

“The donor was success,”

The man is hesitating to conclude either it was a good or bad news because his facial expression didn’t show any relief sign.

“…yet, we’re sorry for your brother…,”

A loud cry filled the room as the man was being tightly hold by the doctor.

It’s been a week since his sister’s transplantation surgery.

And exactly a week after he got call from Chanwoo and never heard of anything from the boy since then. Not only Yunhyeong, but Jinhwan, Bobby, Hanbin, Donghyuk, and Junhoe also didn’t know where Jung Chanwoo has gone. It’s probably going to be a common matter if only the six of them don’t know, yet what makes Yunhyeong dead worried is that their company, YG Entertainment, had no idea about his existence either. The management has tried contacting all family members and can only be connected to his elder brother whom indicated nothing but grew another question for them.

“I’ll let you know where he is someday when I think I’m ready. For now, please, give me a break. Don’t call me asking where he is again and again,” his brother said before cutting off the phone with iKON’s manager. Since then, his number was deactivated and he couldn’t ever be contacted at all.

Given the situation, YG announced that iKON would be in hiatus for some moments and put off the release of their second album. The official reason behind the delay is for giving enough rest for iKON members and getting some more new materials in their upcoming album when actually the real reason is to figure out where Chanwoo has been all this time. This surely drives all of the fans mad because the latest information that Yunhyeong heard is most of the Korean fans burned iKON’s first album due to the continuous delay that YG gives. They’ve been patient enough waiting for iKON debuting and Hanbin said that it’s normal if they’re furious due to another ‘waiting’.

But then, who cares?

Not the six of them.

At least not right now.

Since Chanwoo was unknowingly disappeared, the dorm is being less noisy and members are tend to be quiet even when they were together. They seem to be drawn deep in their thoughts and let the silence filled their heads, especially Yunhyeong. He would sleep the earliest every night with the hope of getting good news about Chanwoo when the morning comes.

Yet the morning that Yunhyeong has looked forward to did never really came.

“What?” Yunhyeong quickly asked when Jinhwan’s head peeked over the door of his room. He is now on top of the bunk bed that belongs to Chanwoo, cleaning up some stuffs even though there’s not much that needs to be cleaned since the owner was not coming back.

“Just... want to check,” he cluelessly answered, getting inside of the room before Yunhyeong could even say anything. Jinhwan brought a comforter belongs to Chanwoo that he washed yesterday and carelessly putting it down to the bottom of bunk bed. He feels awkward once his gaze traces around the room and falls to Chanwoo’s photo that was sticked on the corner of mirror for some seconds. He clenched his fist, shut his eyes, and inhaled some air only to be greeted by the perfume and smell of Chanwoo that still strongly lingers inside. Jinhwan finally figures out why Yunhyeong doesn’t want to really leave the room lately.

This is the only place where he could feel Chanwoo’s presence the most.

Where are you Jung Chanwoo?

Yunhyeong shrugs his shoulders and gets down from the bunk bed to sit on his bed, “..what kind of checking is this?” he chuckled at the elder’s word before looking at the dark blue comforter that Jinhwan threw on top of his pillow and takes some minutes to pat on it.

“You washed it?” he raises his eye brows and smiles at Jinhwan’s nod. Yunhyeong carefully puts the comforter aside before using it to cover his own leg, “..thank you, hyung. You usually scold him for never washing it. He’d be happy when he’s back,”

Jinhwan’s throat got lump at the word ‘he’s back’ yet he covered it with a thin smile that quickly was plastered on his face. There are a lot of thoughts that going into his mind at the word ‘he’s back’ because he doesn’t know why he is very skeptical about that possibility. Yet, he once again (and always) shrugs away the bad thought and taps Yunhyeong’s leg, giving the latter optimistic facial expression before sitting on the edge of his bed. He carefully picks Chanwoo’s comforter, neatly folding it into a pile then resting it on Yunhyeong’s lap.

“You shouldn’t use it before him,” Jinhwan reminded, smiling at the younger who now carefully takes it onto his chest and wraps his arms around it.

“It just feels like hugging him,” he then laughs realising of how cheesy his sentence is.

The silence falls once again. It’s really never easy to build conversation at the time when everything feels so awkward to be talked of. Especially since Hanbin declared that himself would not be in the term of talking for some days later and he even asked everyone for not pushing him talks when he doesn’t want to. It really breaks all members' willingness to talk and they have decided to stay quiet since then. Everyone understands what Hanbin indicated, because as the leader, he must have a lot to bear on his shoulders and to think in his mind right now. He would really want to stay strong for s, to act all smileys, to calm the sad hearts down, to cheer them up, while keep working for the next album yet Kim Hanbin is a human too.

He has his own limit, and probably this almost reaches its peak.

He started growing strange habit that successfully made Jinhwan failed to understand. The leader now always keeps himself busy with pile of books that Hongseok once gifted to him (which Bobby found it super strange since Hanbin was never a fan of book, unless it has some drawings inside) and is being sensitive when someone mentioned Chanwoo’s name.

Even only his surname can drive Hanbin insane.

Donghyuk once was on the phone with Jung Jinhyeong and he playfully said ‘JUNG!’ before hanging up. When he looked back, he found Hanbin’s sour face was directed straight to him as he walked back to his room with the sound of the door banged.

Recently Bobby found out that Hanbin is worried if Chanwoo was planning to sue YG and left the group.

“That kid would better have a good reason for his leave this time. I’m really not forgiving him for making us suffer like this,” Hanbin once said in the midst of his crying state.

Chanwoo is probably not the original member of Team B, either he was a person that everyone wanted in the group at the first time. Yet his presence unbelievably completes the missing puzzle that Jinhwan, Bobby, Yunhyeong, Hanbin, Donghyuk, Junhoe had never realized before.

“He’s not leaving us, right?” Yunhyeong breaks the silence.

Jinhwan rolls his eyes, “You’re now on the same boat with Hanbin? Seriously? No, absolute—,”

“—not that stupid kind of leaving. I dreamt of someone dying a week ago. I thought it was my sister,” he rebutted Jinhwan, “..it was in surgery room. Everything was dark and there’s a lot of blood. It was a really strong memory that still lingers on my mind since then. I didn’t know who it was but what if..,” Yunhyeong couldn’t finish his sentence and pull deeper the comforter in his embrace instead.

“Don’t even think of it. Why would Chanwoo be in a surgery room? He was even with you all days in hospital. That’s absolutely your fear before your sister’s operation,” Jinhwan clearly thinks that it’s nonsense yet he couldn’t understand why his heart now pounds faster to think of that dream.

His inner even tried hard denying that it probably could be true.

“How could I think straight if we still even had no clue of where he is right now? I hope the company lets me do the searching. It’s hard to feel settled if I just stay still like this,” Yunhyeong started getting frustrated. He buried his face to the comforter for holding out his fast breathing. He’s mad, of course. Who else wouldn’t if being locked in a comfortable prison when their significant other was out there probably in danger?

“Trust them. I could see seonsaengnim was worried as well. They’ll do their best,” Jinhwan tried to soothe Yunhyeong. He pulls the younger in an embrace and pats his back softly. There are a lot of things that Jinhwan actually would say to Yunhyeong if Chanwoo permitted him. The older never knows when Chanwoo would be back and it probably would be the best to let Yunhyeong knows about how Chanwoo has felt towards him. To let Yunhyeong knows that even though Chanwoo wouldn’t be back for the others, he would definitely be back for Yunhyeong.

Yet those words are only stuck at his heart. He has no courage to reveal everything because he knows that Chanwoo would disagree. Especially when the kid was not ready to have such feelings for Yunhyeong.

He pulls out his embrace and puts both his hands on Yunhyeong’s shoulder. He shakes it lightly for Yunhyeong to see him, “Everything’s going to be okay,” he smiles, a more genuine one, “Now, why don’t you just save the comforter? I don’t want to wash it again when Chanwoo’s back,” Jinhwan jokes. He slaps the younger’s arm, trying to divert Yunhyeong’s attention from thinking too much about Chanwoo. Even though he knew that his effort only last less than ten minutes, Yunhyeong would think of Chanwoo again after the day ends, when the day begins, and even inbetween.

Yet at least Jinhwan tried.

Yunhyeong jumped from his bed to approach the drawer in the corner of the room. He remembers he never even once used nor touch it. Chanwoo was the regular user of the drawer and now that the kid is gone, the drawer looks really lonely. Yunhyeong remembers how Chanwoo always neatly compiled all his documents, books, and favorite readings into the drawer. He recently also likes to write something on his book that Yunhyeong assumed as his studying materials and saves it there.

He carelessly pulls the drawer and never knows that the opener of the drawer was majorly broken and that the drawer has been fully filled by Chanwoo. Once he opened it, all the documents uncontrollably fall out along with the thick dust on the bottom of the books.

“Yah, Jung Chanwoo!” he slightly chuckles, has no idea that there are just so much that Chanwoo has saved inside.

Jinhwan chuckles too and get himself sitting on the floor to help Yunhyeong cleaning up, “He surely saves a lot,”

“This is too much,” Yunhyeong looks up to Jinhwan for a facial expression that told him like can you even believe it?, “I’ll clean it up, hyung. You just sit there, it’s okay.” Yunhyeong assures, eyes are not leavi