"Hyung, I think I'm in love with you."

 

 

After I said these words, I felt as if something was lifted off my chest. It felt as if I found the last missing piece of my puzzle.

 

Everything fell iinto place. I felt really calm. I understood now, why I always wanted to touch him for some time now, hugged him from behind, brush my hand against his arm. The kiss... it was just a trigger, it destroyed my mental dam that I created to block my feelings.

I looked him in the eyes and my heart grew, I knew I was right. I was really in love with him.

 

He just stared back at me with wide eyes. His face was painted with shock. I couldn't help but smile and his cheek. Then I gently untangled myself from his arms that were still around me.

 

 

" Hyung, don't worry about this. If you want to... you can just forget. About this all."

My heart stung a little when I said that. I forced myself to smile again and turned around to leave. I put my hand at the door knob. Tears were starting to gather in my eyes.

 

 

" Kookie. "

 

I quickly wiped my tears and turned around. He was now sitting on the floor, his hair disheveled (I guess it was mostly my doing). He seemed confused.

"How... how do you know? I mean... we switched bodies and now suddenly you are in love with me? Isn't this a little bit... too weird? And sudden? Aren't you in love with yourself?"

 

 

" Hyung... " I tried to stop him.

 

 

" Or is it the kiss? Maybe you just feel like that because we kissed? How do you know..."

 

 

" Hyung." I walked over to him and placed a finger on his lips to stop his questions. " I'm in love with you. Only you. I'm in love with Park Jimin. Regardless of which body he is in, how he looks or where he is. I love you Park Jimin and in fact, I think I have for some time now. It just took long to realise, well you could say that the kiss helped a lot."

 

 

"Oh." he just managed to say against my finger.

 

 

" I'm sorry, hyung. It must be a lot to take in at once. You can really forget about this if that makes you feel at ease."

I lightly caressed his hair for the last time and really left the room. I walked to the dorm automatically, not noticing anything around me.

 

 

"Hey, Jiminie, are you all right.... " I noticed V-hyung saying at the back of my mind but ignored it and went straight to Jimin's room.

 

 

I threw myself at his bed. Everything smelled like him. Slowly the realisation of what happened started to flow into me. We kissed. It was the most amazing kiss. And then I told him I love him.

And now everything was ruined. We couldn't go to the way we were before.

But at the same time, I felt really peaceful, finally being true to myself. I did what I had to do, I couldn't just bottle up that feeling. And now, I could just wait.

 

 

***********************

 

 

, it wasn't all as simple as I thought. I was freaking out, dying to know what he was thinking every second. Aish, I should've made him answer definitively. I tried not to hope much but I couldn't help myself. If he was going to reject me, I needed to have him say so aloud and clear. And here I was so sure that I could play it all so cool. But right now, I was a mess.

 

Though I knew it was going to happen, it still hurt a little when he started avoiding me. It wasn't like he left the room when I came in but he didn't touch me unless he had to and didn't look at me even once since that night. One evening, about three weeks later, I went to practice at the studio. I started opening the door but was stopped when I heard V-hyungs voice.

 

 

"Kookie, aren't you working yourself too hard lately? You're gonna collapse at this rate."

 

 

"I'm gonna be fine. " I opened the door a little further.

Jimin was sitting on the floor with his head between his knees.

 

 

"Did something happen? You know you can tell hyung everything." Jimin-hyung lifted his head.

 

 

" Everything is fine, Tae. I mean, hyung. Don't worry. I just need to think about something."

He faked a smile, got up and walked over to the radio. I noticed that he didn't look too good. He was pale and had visible dark bags under his eyes.

 

I closed the door silently. After few seconds I heard loud music from behind it. I sighed and returned back to the dorm.

 

I sat myself in from of the tv and started watching something stupid which I didn't really pay attention to. My mood was only getting darker and darker. I made Jimin-hyung like this. He was probably so troubled with because he was too afraid of hurting me with his rejection. I knew he loved me and cared for me (as his dongsaeng, of course) so it must've been hard for him knowing that he would have to hurt me. I frowned. Maybe I should turn all this in a joke? Hidden camera or something?

 

 

"Jiminnie?" 

Jin-hyung came into the living room with a bag of chips.

" Weren't you going to practice? "

He sat beside me and offered me some chips, which I gladly accepted.

 

 

"Yeah." I muttered, munching on the delicious, nice paprika chips "But I changed my mind."

 

 

" Is something the matter? You don't look very good lately."

I felt his worried gaze on me and sighed.

 

 

"Not really. I just... I think that I said something to someone that I shouldn't have said and now that person is having a hard time because of me. "

 I felt tears gather in my eyes. Words just sort of flowed, I couldn't help it.

"And now we will never be close again, not only did I put him in a difficult situation, I also lost a person who was really precious to me. "

 

 Tears were streaming down my face. Who knew I was such a crybaby. I buried my face in my hands. Jin-hyungs arms found their way around me and I was crying like a baby in his arms while he was my head gently.

 

 

"Shhh, Jiminie, don't cry."

He was murmuring comforting phrases into my ear until I calmed down a little. When I could finally breath normally, I pulled back and looked at him gratefully through my still blurred vision.

 

 

"Thank you hyung."

I smiled through my tears. I felt a lot better.

 

 

"No problem. I will always be there for you if you need me."

He smiled back while caressing my hair. 

"Can I ask something?"

 

 

"Sure."

 

 

"Is it about Jungkook? "

 I gasped a little, surprised.

 

 

" How do you know?"

 

 

"Well, it's kind of obvious. He also seems a little bit off lately, and you haven't even been looking at each other, or more like, interacting at all."

 

His face was once again showing a worried expression. For a second I considered lying, but figured it had no sense. Besides, I couldn't lie to this hyung. So I sighed and dropped my gaze.

 

 

"Yeah, it's about him. " I confirmed, resigned.

 

 

"Do you want me to talk to him or something?"

 

 

"No!! "

My shout surprised even myself. -

"I mean, no. I think we should solve this on our own. But thank you hyung. Really, a lot. "

 I smiled shyly. I was a little embarrassed to have him seen myself crying so much, but on the other hand he thought he was talking to Jimin, so it wasn't so bad.

 

 

 

"As I said, no problem Jiminie. You should go to get some rest. - he ruffled my hair one last time and went to the kitchen.

I sighed and got up too. I closed the door and threw myself on Jimin's bed. I felt exhausted, but my heart was a lot lighter. I should somehow recompensate it to Jin-hyung.

I closed my eyes and felt myself drifting away in the land of dreams, probably filled with Jimin-hyungs beautiful eye-smile.

 

 

**********************

 

 

 

A cat was walking all over my body. I tried to get it off, but it was still there, getting heavier and heavier... I snapped my eyes open, annoyed at the cat, and to my surprise, I saw Jimin-hyung climbing over my body to my side.

 

 

" What are you doing? " I asked, confused.

He froze in his movement and looked at me, with wide eyes.

 

 

"Well, I... " I saw his cheeks getting a little red in the darkness. "I wanted to lie down here." he said, pointing at the spot beside me.

Now I felt really confused. What is this? I moved a little to make him some more space.

 

 

"Here you go." he lied down beside me.

We just lied in awkward silence, I could feel him being all tensed up, but decided to wait for him to say something. My mind was spinning, imagining hundreds of scenarios at the speed of light.

 

 

" Actually, Kookie... "he started in a barely audible voice  " I've been meaning to talk to you."

He sounded really nervous.I sighed. This was it. He was going to reject me, and I have to say that it's okay, and tell him not to worry and then act like a good friend while inside I will be dying on the inside.

"Kookie? Are you sleeping." I felt him glance at me.

 

 

" No, continue." I refused to look at him.

I didn't want him to see my eyes full of pain I was sure was going to feel any second now.

 

 

" So... I heard you talking to Jin-hyung today... Sorry it was unintentional, I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I just kind of heard it.'"he quickly added.

I felt embarrassment grow. So he must've heard me crying. Oh God. I only made it harder for him.

 

 

"And? " I rushed him to continue. I just wanted to hear it already.

 

 

" And I... I didn't realise that... that you were hurting that much because of me. "

"Here it comes" I sighed mentally.

"You know, since that practice and that kiss I... I don't know, I just felt really confused with my feelings. "

Wait...  confused? What does he mean confused?

" And I thought about it. A lot. And finally, after some time I came to the conclusion that... that I do to."

I looked at him, surprised. He was now looking at me too. What was he saying? He raised his hand and run it through my hair.

" What I'm saying is that I love you too Kookie. And it seems that I love you quite a lot. "

 I just stared at him, my jaw hanging open, trying to transform what he had just said. He giggled lightly.

" Don't make my face look so ugly. "

 

 I shook my head, trying to recover from shock and think clearly.

 

 

" So... what you are saying... is that I love you and you love me too? " I asked.

I had to get sure, because I didn't believe my ears. I had to have a definitive answer. Jimin giggled again.

 

 

"Yes, Kookie. I love you and you love me. " he said and suddenly he pulled me closer and our lips finally met once again.

 

 

I couldn't believe it. Park Jimin, whom I loved, loved me back. He loved me back! We were both smiling into the kiss. It was really gentle and sweet. And it was the best kiss that we have shared so far. I pulled away and he rested his forehead on mine. I was still smiling like a dork, my heart was happily thumping in my chest, light as a feather.

 

 

"Sorry it took so long. " he whispered. "I guess I was just scared. Of believing you, of what people will think... Also that situation with our bodies... But when I saw you crying so hard I knew that I couldn't do it to you any longer. I don't care about anything but you." he said and kissed my forehead.

 

 

"All that matters is that you are here with me. We will figure the rest out somehow. " I answered while hugging him tight and closing my eyes.

After a while I could feel his breath steadying and very soon I followed him into the land of dreams with a smile on my face.