I think I know when the first time my feelings for Sehun started growing. It has to be that day about a year ago. That very night that changed everything for me.

Chanyeol and Jongin were lugging a drunk Sehun through the door and I just hoped that we weren't being too loud as they dragged him up the stairs and into my room. I thanked them and they returned to the cab quickly, not wanting to keep the metre running any longer than necessary. I sighed at the sight of Sehun on my bed, looking so wasted. It was Junmyeon's and Baekhyun's birthday celebration and they had decided to go partying. I wasn't sure if I should change his clothes for him, wouldn't that be too intimate?

Whatever my decision was, it didn't matter. Because Sehun suddenly sat up, groaning as he ed his shirt. I gasped and widened my eyes.

"What are you doing?" I hissed at him.

"Hot," he grunted.

When he couldn't his shirt properly due to the alcohol in his system, he whined like a little boy. I quickly rushed forward to help him instead, afraid that his whine might wake my parents up. He rested the side of his face on his shoulder as he watched me undo the buttons of his shirt for him. He was mumbling something, so I bent down lower to hear him better.

"Huh? Say it again, Sehun," I murmured, still undoing his shirt.

"Said you're really pretty," he slurred, his big hand covering mine.

My eyes widened. He brought his hands up clumsily to cup my neck before he actually pressed his lips to mine. My heart started racing like a hummingbird's heartbeat and I swore I would have vomited butterflies. Without knowing, I was clenching onto his shirt, balling my hands into fists. Sehun tilted his head and deepened the kiss, spreading my lips apart. His tongue slid into my mouth for the first time and I gasped.

The small fire that was once burning behind a frosted glass was now burning even brighter. The glass had shattered just enough for that fire to be seen as clear as day. It was steadily growing bigger with every second I let this kiss go on. The burn felt so good that I couldn't stop.

I moaned when he slid his hand down to pull on my wrist so that I was sitting on his lap. He started roaming his calloused but gentle hands around my body, touching me in places he would never have dared to touch sober. Even in his drunken state of mind, his kisses weren't sloppy. He knew how to move his tongue against mine and make me weak. I guess when you know how to dance, every part of your body naturally knows how to, too. Sehun's hand was under my shirt, fiddling with my bra buckle. I finally pulled away from the kiss no matter how much I wanted his lips on mine.

"Sehun, stop," I panted, pushing his roaming hands away. I didn't want to destroy this amazing friendship we had just for a night of pleasure.

"But I want you," he whispered, looking at me with eyes that almost made me believe that he hadn't been drinking.

"You're drunk, Sehun," I muttered, clambering off his lap. I had to try to ignore the hard tent beneath me.

"I can spell your name perfectly fine and I know your birthday," he tried to make me believe him.

But I really didn't want to regret this. It was going to be my first time and I just didn't want to do it with a drunk person, even if this drunk person was my best friend. I knew that it was going to be Sehun's first time too and I just couldn't take advantage of him like that even if he was the one initiating it.

So I shook my head and tried to get away from him. He held onto my wrist. "Please, baby..."

I was a teenager too, I had the same lust and desire running through my veins. I finally made a compromise with him, "If you wake up tomorrow and still think you want me..." When he stared at me, waiting for me to finish my sentence, I sighed. "Then I'll let you."

We had always talked about how we were going to lose it to each other, but I just didn't want our first time to be like this. Besides, he wouldn't remember anything the next morning, I was sure of it.

I was wrong.

I woke up to Sehun nibbling on my neck, his body flushed against mine and his hand under my shirt. I moaned and turned around, cracking an eye open to stare at Sehun. He stopped kissing my neck and looked at me. He looked tired and extremely worn out.

"Can we do it now?" he asked, voice sandy and low.

"Now?" I frowned, shifting uncomfortably. I felt his hardness down below and held my breath.

"You promised," he muttered as his hand crept slowly to my pants and into my underwear. "I still want to do this. I still want you."

"Sehun, we really shouldn't— Oh..." My own mewl cut off what I was about to say when Sehun touched me somewhere no one else has ever laid hands on.

"Please?" he breathed. I bit my bottom lip when he my earshell with the tip of his nose while he continued to touch me and turn me into putty in his hands.

"I just... I don't want our friendship to... turn awkward," I said between moans.

"It won't," he promised. "I just want my first time to be with you, baby..."

Of course he had to use baby. Of course that was fair. And of course I ended up giving in to him.

Sehun and I were on each other the moment I sighed and nodded my head. We were only nineteen then and we had let our hormones take over. But apart from the raging hormones, I knew the both of us wanted this. If we had only let our ual sides take over, we wouldn't have gone for slow kisses, Sehun wouldn't have given me sensual all over my body, I wouldn't have run my hands along his abs in a caress. But most importantly, we wouldn't have taken the time to remind each other of our love.

The moment Sehun entered me, I knew that I was done for. The fire I had for Sehun was now burning strong and bright, the frosted glass now entirely broken down. I gasped because its flames were already the insides of my chest, making my entire body burn, threatening to turn me into ashes. With every move Sehun made, he stared straight into my eyes, his teeth sunken into his bottom lip. His gaze was so deep and so butterfly inducing that the knot in my lower body unravelled so fast and so quick that Sehun had to kiss me so that my moans and screams could not be heard. And even within that kiss that was meant to shut me up, he caressed my tongue with his in a way that portrayed his love for me.

I knew that it was just the love best friends had for each other that he was showing me but with the pleasure and high coursing through my veins, I thought I saw his love for me as something more than platonic. And I think that was how my feelings grew. Grew so fast and so powerful that it was like pedaling a bicycle downhill with no brakes.

I was falling for my best friend. Hard. And fast.