chapter iii

denial is not just a river in egypt

“Ooh,” Sanghyuk pronounced, looking around the piano room with its neat folders of scores stacked in wall-height cabinets that ran around the perimeter. The piano itself was a beautiful grand piano, standing to one side near the windows.

“It’s nice, right? I come here a lot,” Taekwoon said quietly, switching on the airconditioning and motioning for Sanghyuk to take his seat at the piano.

“I can see why.” Sanghyuk sat down and looked out the windows. The view was nothing much, but they were high up enough to feel isolated from all the other people scurrying about on ground level. The late-afternoon sun was pouring in, golden hour not that far off, and Sanghyuk felt he could imagine Taekwoon coming here to play when he was stressed out; letting the music calm him or just to look out the windows in the comforting presence of the piano. It was that kind of place. Sanghyuk liked it.

Taekwoon sat down next to him and opened the lid, running his fingers over the keys as if in greeting. “Okay. So maybe we can start with basic ?”

“You’re not even going to buy me dinner first?” Sanghyuk asked without missing a beat, and knew he deserved the Look he got in return.

“Sorry,” Sanghyuk let himself giggle a bit before he burst from holding it in at Taekwoon’s unimpressed glare. “Sorry. I couldn’t help it.”

“That’s such a used line,” Taekwoon said after a while, correcting Sanghyuk’s resting hold on the keys.

“It was funny. Admit it,” Sanghyuk needled, trying his best to imitate the way Taekwoon held his hands. Taekwoon just gave him another look.

Taekwoon had him do scales, stopping him ever so often to make him change the fingers he used – “No, like this” “Why can’t I do it this way? It’s more comfortable” “No, like this” – until Sanghyuk felt he was starting to understand why Hakyeon had wished him good luck with his piano lessons.

“How long were you learning on your own?” Taekwoon asked after a while, watching Sanghyuk try to wrestle his fingers into the correct positions for the scale he was playing. “You might have gotten too used to the wrong – wait, not like that. Your hands are so big, why are you having trouble with this? You should be able to reach the next key easily. See how I do it-”

Sanghyuk stretched his fingers as wide as they would go. “Look, you have such long, elegant fingers. Mine are like – like construction workers. Yours are ballerinas. You can’t compare them.”

“My fingers are not ballerinas. Think of this less like,” Taekwoon wracked his brain, “like dribbling a basketball down a court, okay? You need to make the notes flow, not punch them out like this – what, what’s wrong?”

Sanghyuk was still making the face that had brought Taekwoon up short. “Don’t make me think about basketball, hyung. I still don’t know what I’m going to do about that.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t know they were that bad, actually,” Taekwoon said, letting his hands relax. A short break was probably a good idea since Sanghyuk wasn’t getting it. “Weren’t you with the team from the start?”

“No, I wasn’t. I didn’t want to take up basketball again, honestly. I had a really bad injury last year of high school and that’s when I took up the piano, started looking into other things. Mostly to distract myself but after a while I started to wonder what I was missing, you know? Training sixteen, twenty hours a week. There’s so much more I want to try, but in the end I couldn’t run from the fact I love playing ball too much. I missed it. I was fooling around with Sungjae on one of the college courts about two weeks ago and Hongbin sunbae saw me playing. He’s the one who got me to join the team. He was pretty persuasive, actually,” Sanghyuk finished with a small thoughtful smile down at his hands in his lap, and looked up to see Taekwoon trying not to stare at him and failing.

“What? Hyung, what?” Sanghyuk asked worriedly, eyes going wide.

“When you say persuasive…” Taekwoon trailed off, thinking of the way Sanghyuk had smiled when he’d said it and not able to help his suspicion, knowing Hongbin. “Exactly how did he persuade you?”

“What? What is that supposed to mean?” Sanghyuk demanded.

“You didn’t sleep with him, did you?” Taekwoon asked, trying not to be awkward about it. “I mean – I don’t know which way you swing, but – just so I can put my mind at rest, because Hongbin isn’t above using such tactics to get what he wants, and he always gets what he wants, you know what I mean?”

Sanghyuk was speechless. “Hyung!” He managed, after a few moments. “We played a game together. He was good. He – he reminded me how basketball was fun.”

“You were very embarrassed when you found out that day I shared the apartment with Hongbin,” Taekwoon continued, having to see this through to the end.

“Well-” Sanghyuk spluttered. “Of course I was! He’s my senior in the team, and – and – well, I want to impress him because he’s really good, and everyone likes him, and he’s really goodlooking-” Taekwoon’s eyes narrowed and Sanghyuk rushed on. “Which doesn’t mean that I slept with him!”

“But you have a crush on him,” Taekwoon said.

No, oh my god, hyung,” Sanghyuk huffed, and Taekwoon noted the blush creeping up his neck, feeling slightly remorseful. “I – I don’t – I’m not gay, hyung.”

“Okay, I’m sorry, but once you get to know Hongbin you’ll realise that what I just asked you isn’t all that weird,” Taekwoon said, reaching out a hand to squeeze Sanghyuk’s shoulder in apology.

“Have you slept with him, then?” Sanghyuk turned around and shot out, eyes challenging. Taekwoon dropped his hand.

“I wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole,” Taekwoon said scathingly. “I’ve known him too long. Plus, Wonsik would hate me – ah.”

Sanghyuk looked at him curiously and Taekwoon clamped his mouth shut. Damn it.

Sanghyuk sat in silence for a few seconds, Taekwoon internally groaning at himself. “Oh, so that’s why Wonsik hyung was so upset after the game when we walked back to the dorms together, us and Hakyeon hyung,” Sanghyuk breathed, putting two and two together really quick. “Hongbin sunbae went home with Sejin noona.”

“I don’t know her name,” Taekwoon admitted. “Look, I really wasn’t supposed to say anything. I know Wonsik makes himself pretty obvious because he’s an idiot who doesn’t have a poker face and anybody could twig it after watching him with Hongbin a couple of times, but please don’t say anything, okay? You weren’t supposed to know.”

“I can keep a secret,” Sanghyuk protested. “Wow, Wonsik hyung. That’s sad. Oh, that makes sense,” Sanghyuk said, looking like he’d just remembered something. “When Hongbin sunbae introduced Sejin noona to us after training one of the other seniors said he bet ‘this one’ lasted a week because she wasn’t Hongbin sunbae’s usual type.”

At Taekwoon’s questioning look at what sense that made, Sanghyuk gestured between them. “Why you said once I get to know Hongbin sunbae it’ll make sense why you asked if I slept with him. Hongbin sunbae hooks up a lot?”

“I think he’s trying for a Guinness record,” Taekwoon said flatly.

“Wow,” Sanghyuk said, looking genuinely impressed. Taekwoon shook his head at him. Hongbin’s powers of attraction were indeed impressive, but they seemed less so once Wonsik and the way Hongbin treated him came into the picture. Taekwoon pursed his lips, however – he’d spilled enough about Wonsik’s love life for one evening.

“So Hongbin sunbae swings both ways?”

“Up, down, left, right,” Taekwoon answered, playing ascending chords to accompany each word.

“And you…? You didn’t say you wouldn’t sleep with Hongbin sunbae because you were straight, but because you’ve known him for too long and Wonsik hyung would hate you if you did.”

“Is this a piano lesson or gossip session?” Taekwoon asked to hide his self-consciousness, the chord he played this time discordant.

“Hey, that rhymes,” Sanghyuk grinned, sensibly letting it go and giving Taekwoon a friendly elbow in the ribs. “Alright, teacher, let’s go.”

Taekwoon gave him more scales to do, but not before elbowing him back first.

*

Taekwoon pressed the ‘end call’ button and turned to call out to Hongbin in the living room, which to be honest was only a few steps from the kitchen where he was about to do the washing up.

“Hakyeon says they’re coming over. They want to introduce their new roommate to us.”

Finally,” Hongbin rolled off the couch, bustling into his room presumably to change out of his pajamas; Taekwoon wondered if he was the only one Hongbin allowed to see him unguarded like this. Taekwoon shook his head, something he found himself doing a lot when it came to Hongbin these days. He hoped for Wonsik’s sake the new roommate – Jaehwan – wasn’t hot.

It took Hakyeon, Wonsik and Jaehwan twenty minutes to walk over, and Hongbin was artfully arranged on the sofa in a sleeveless tank top and clingy sweatpants by the time they arrived. It had been four days or so since Jaehwan had moved in, and all he’d heard from Hakyeon was that he was really lively and a lot of fun to have around, if a little messy, and that Wonsik adored him. Taekwoon didn’t have to ask to know that Hakyeon was not-so-secretly hoping that Jaehwan would be the cure to Wonsik’s Hongbin ills, though he’d have to admit that he was sceptical. If three years of Hongbin playing with Wonsik’s feelings non-stop and dating half the world right underneath Wonsik’s nose had done nothing to dampen Wonsik’s burning passion for Hongbin he doubted the appearance of this Jaehwan would have much of an effect.

Half an hour into the visit, though, and Taekwoon was shakenly realising he might have to eat his words.

Jaehwan was tall – honestly, it was freaky how Taekwoon had managed to fall in with so many other six-foot-plus guys in college when in his high school he’d been the only one near that height in his class – and possessed of a mop of dyed-brown hair, a rather impressive nose, and a smile that Taekwoon would have described was like sunshine, if he’d been the sappy sort. Jaehwan talked a mile a minute, laughing as often, and his whole demeanor was infectious. He was the sort of person Taekwoon had always tried to avoid, back in school – irrepressible, gregarious, not to mention loud – because Taekwoon was the absolute opposite. Yet, he found himself smiling at the things Jaehwan said, already talking to them like they’d all been friends from way back. Hakyeon was sitting by, looking triumphant, and it was no wonder – Wonsik was completely smitten. Taekwoon wouldn’t have believed it if he hadn’t seen it with his own two eyes: the all-powerful Hongbin had been dethroned.

Wonsik hung onto Jaehwan’s every word, calling him ‘cute’ every other sentence or so, his deep laugh mingling with Jaehwan’s whenever Jaehwan cracked a joke. Taekwoon didn’t think it was possible for Wonsik to be sitting any closer to Jaehwan unless he got up and sat right in Jaehwan’s lap.

Taekwoon sneaked a glance over at Hongbin, who looked slightly shellshocked. If Taekwoon himself was surprised at this turn of events, he could only imagine what Hongbin must be feeling, and Taekwoon wondered if it tasted a little bit like karma. It wasn’t like Wonsik was ignoring Hongbin, but the adoring look on Wonsik’s face that had previously only ever been directed at Hongbin now clearly had a different object. And all this, after only four days?

Taekwoon slid his gaze back to Jaehwan and Wonsik and Hakyeon caught his eye. Taekwoon gestured with a tiny nod towards the kitchen and Hakyeon got up on the pretext of helping Taekwoon get them all more beers from the fridge.

Taekwoon made sure they were hidden from view behind the fridge door before he raised a hand to his mouth, shaking his head at Hakyeon in disbelief. Words weren’t necessary.

“I know,” Hakyeon hissed at him excitedly. “I’m as amazed as you are. I don’t know where this Jaehwan popped up from but he’s the weapon I always wanted.”

“I can’t believe it,” Taekwoon said. “I feel like we’ve fallen into the twilight zone.”

“Right? I never thought it was possible either. But it’s happening.”

“Does Jaehwan realise?”

“We’re talking about Wonsik here, Taek,” Hakyeon deadpanned. “Unless Jaehwan is a complete idiot, he’s going to realise what’s going on.”

“But, Hakyeon,” Taekwoon remembered the beers, and pulled out two to put in Hakyeon’s hands. “What if Jaehwan doesn’t feel the same? Wonsik’s just going to fall right back into Hongbin’s arms.”

“I haven’t thought that far yet,” Hakyeon whispered, bumping the fridge door closed with his hip. “I’m just enjoying the look on Bin’s face for now.”

They reappeared and passed out the beers, Hongbin looking strained because Wonsik and Jaehwan were quietly talking about something that clearly didn’t involve him, Wonsik looking blissful. Taekwoon almost felt sorry for him.

When the three of them left some time later, only Taekwoon saw them to the door, Hongbin waving feebly from the sofa and blinking blankly at their small television once they were gone.

“I told you so,” Taekwoon said gently, leaning down to squeeze Hongbin’s shoulder as he made his way to his bedroom.

“Told me what?” Hongbin asked, tone curt.

“That you’re going to regret how you treat Wonsik. Now your puppy’s found a new owner, hasn’t he?”

“What makes you think I care?” Hongbin laughed, the sound unnatural. “He can do whatever he wants. Honestly, it’s a relief not having him hanging off me like he always does.”

Taekwoon shrugged. “Sure.”

“I mean it, hyung,” Hongbin stressed, getting to his feet. “I don’t care. Goodnight.”

Hongbin turned around and went into his bedroom.

*

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Ichihanabi
#1
Chapter 16: Ahhhh.. its over will miss you huhuhu luck is life ... loverboy or bae is really suit hyuk very much.. tq mother N
sang-hyogi
#2
I've read this a bout five times, and as an avid Leohyuk lover, I can say this is indeed my favourite fic
SangoBongo #3
Chapter 16: This was SO GOOD! Your writing is seriously fantastic and your sense of humor is hilarious. I love that you incorporated multiple ualities in this fic. Representation is hella important and you did such a good job with it, thank you! This is definitely something I'll be rereading!! :)
JeeThePotatoBijj
#4
Chapter 16: i also love how you made hongbin as taekwoon's baby brother, well sort of and everyone is well aware of it
Artemys94
#5
Chapter 16: I can't believe I spent my whole holiday reading this, it's so good.
ash_tin
#6
Chapter 16: did I just reread this entire story in one sitting? Yes, because I love it and missed it that much. I enjoyed it just as much as the first time I read it, and Im sure it won't be long before I'm back to read it again! Thank you again for writing this ^^
sang-hyogi
#7
Chapter 16: Oh my. It's 4:46 in the morning as I finish this and I am dead. Dead, dead, dead. I began reading this simply because of Leohyuk, but I enjoyed the Rabin immensely too. I'm so dead, oh my goodness. Thank you for writing this beauty of a story. Thank you.
diamondacequeen #8
Chapter 16: i absolutely adored every moment of reading this fic omg. it was so well written and i couldn't get enough of the character interactions. the kenvi had me clutching my chest because i knew it wouldn't end happily for them but damn it they were so cute! i'm glad hongbin was actively trying to be better for himself and for wonsik. watching him lie like that hurt more than the knowledge that kenvi couldn't be together lol. and i LOVED the leobin. taekwoon was the best hyung for hongbin and he needed him. it was so great. i also loved how protective hakyeon was over wonsik. i feel like that was the blatant opposition to hongbin's actions that we needed. ah, i just really, really loved reading this. it was so fun. loved every bit of it!
Kat_Starlight #9
Chapter 16: I don't know what to say, this story gave me so many feels >-< omg when Taek asked if he was to late omg I sobbed ;---; so totally in love with this story, you write so really!! My luck feels are all over the place right now ^___^
ash_tin
#10
rereading because i love this story so much. out of curiosity, would you ever consider writing a short sequel or an epilogue of sorts? :O i'd read it in a heartbeat!<3