OST

"I’ll go home now, oppa, I’ll be back this afternoon." Myungsoo closed his eyes when Jieun gently kissed his forehead, as usual, when they would be separated, and as usual also, Jieun would make herself Myungsoo’s whole face with her fingers. 

"You'll be fine if I left right?" With difficulty, although smile was the last thing he wanted to do, Myungsoo was smiling, for Jieun’s sake, for the sake of his lover. 

"I'll wait you to come back this afternoon." His voice was hoarse and weak. Myungsoo hated it. Jieun once again pulled his forehead and kissed it, as if reluctant to move away. 

"I’ll definitely come back." She whispered softly before disappearing behind the door of the white intensive care unit. 

The door Myungsoo hated as it always swallowed Jieun shadow, disappeared, got away from him. The door that had been Myungsoo view for almost 6 months. Six months of agonizing, filled with drugs. Painfull chemotherapy, relentless injections, disturbing examinations and checks up, only to find that he would die in three months, only to find that he had no hope to live again. Only to find that the last chance to see the world was only 3% of 100 people suffering from the same disease with him, a very malignant brain cancer, brain cancer last stage. 

Myungsoo didn’t want to die. No, not because he loved this world. But rather because of Jieun. Yes, Jieun, his soul mate, the only woman who could make him surrender voluntarily, Myungsoo still had a dream that want he wanted to accomplish together Jieun. He wanted to change the world, he wanted to realize a beautiful world, a world that full of goodness premises, not a destroyed world and chaotic as now. And it's all for the sake of Jieun. Myungsoo bitterly staring at the ceiling above him. 

Stupid dream. 

He had a dream as huge as the sky but he was trapped in this body. This damned weak body, the sick and almost died body which completely unusable and only troublesome to others, even troublesome to Jieun, the woman he loved, a woman who didn’t leave even after Myungsoo became invalid and could just lying weakly in hospital, entirely dependent on medical treatment that support him. Jieun never wanted to leave Myungsoo though he forced her, threat her, even throw her out with harsh words. Until then Myungsoo yield and accept everything, Jieun loved him, it’s cruel if he forced her away from the man she loved, especially when they only had a narrow time. 

Before Myungsoo body gave up and lost, before his body died and his life taken away, separated forever and would never meet her again. God... Myungsoo involuntarily gasped that name, remember Jieun always reminded him to remember God. But although Myungsoo was fed up ask to Gof for recovery, he knew God had set his destiny. God had set him to die, nothing else he could do. 

"Seems like it’s going to rain this afternoon." 

A deep voice he heard for the first time made Myungsoo shocked. His roommate, a new entry yesterday evening who immediately fell asleep because of the influence of drugs, seems to had been awake, staring at him from across the bed, his eyes looked shady, somehow. 

"Maybe we will be together for a while." He smiled and sat up a little bit, he looked fragile, his body was weak, but somehow there was a power emanated from him. 

"Maybe, if I can last much longer." Myungsoo said slowly, couldn’t hide the bitterness in his voice. That man winced and cleared his throat. 

"Why? Are you sentenced to die?" This time Myungsoo frowned at that man's words, what kind of question was that? This room is an intensive care unit for end-stage cancer patients who had no hope of living longer, of course he was going to die and it looked like him too, because he was put into the same room with Myungsoo. 

"Within three months." Myungsoo answered flatly. That man chuckled. 

"It’s a verdict from a doctor, a human. May God be willing else, who knows?" 

"God? I haven’t even mentioned his name." Myungsoo rubbed his thinning hair and loss due to relentless chemotherapy. 

"You don’t trust him again?" 

"No, I still believe in him. It's just... I feel useless to invoke a miracle from him, he certainly wants me to die." That man chuckled again. 

"So cynical. There are times when we are grateful that we were given the ease, die easily, die without choice. Rather than people who can’t die, can’t control themselves and then abandoned by every people who you loved." His voice turned hoarse and looked sad. Myungsoo paused, trying to examine that man’s words, but couldn’t understand the meaning.

"The person you love, the woman who had just gone before, is she the person you love?" 

"You saw her?" That man’s smile expanded, as if remembering. 

"I see a really deep love, you're lucky to be loved like that." 

"Yes, I’m lucky." Myungsoo didn’t argue, a warm feeling flooded his chest. 

"If only... if only you were given the chance to choose, the choice is you could choose life, for the woman you love, but you have to bear heavy consequences behind the choice, would you be willing to choose it?" Myungsoo frowned, didn’t understand even more the conversation his roommate said, but inevitably he responded well. 

"Of course, the slightest chance, if I could choose life, for the sake of my loved one, I would choose it. No matter how serious risk that must be my responsibilities will be." 

"If the first option is you're dead to fate, but the world will run well in the end without you, your lover will ultimately be happy with the new man ordained by God with the world will be run as such and alright. The second option is that you are given a chance against fate, you're cured, you can live, can love your lover, but the