Mingyu groaned in exasperation and ruffled his messy bed hair as he recalled Wonwoo’s words.

“It was…until you moved into the dorms.”

But Wonwoo had already reassured Mingyu that home is not home without Mingyu so why is Mingyu agitated and unsettled over the remark.

Has hyung moved on without me? Does hyung not love me anymore? Does hyung not want me anymore? It may have been a slip of his tongue but does he really mean what he says? Perhaps this is what he subconsciously thinks. And hyung didn’t look as though he was joking. He didn’t say it was a joke.

Perhaps Mingyu was overanalysing things. After all, Wonwoo did say this is still Mingyu’s home. Mingyu grabbed the pillows one by one to sniff out his own scent. But he could not detect even a faint whiff of his scent. It was just Wonwoo’s and although Wonwoo’s scent was comforting, Mingyu stated to panic. Was his existence being erased? How does Wonwoo sleep without Mingyu’s scent? They have been inseparable since Mingyu was five (Korean age). Mingyu was turning 21 (Korean age). They have lived in Wonwoo’s student apartment for more than two years since Wonwoo started university with Mingyu only moving out one year ago to live with his fellow idol trainees of Polaris Entertainment. They’ve never been apart for such a long time. They were both living in Seoul but only got to see one another every two weeks or so, sometimes even longer because Polaris enforced a strict curfew and schedule on its trainees.

Mingyu was distressed at the thoughts of Wonwoo moving on with his life and the both of them gradually growing apart. Hyung will graduate, work, and start a family of his own. He will be busy. Mingyu will also be too busy with his idol lifestyle to even meet Wonwoo. Mingyu started to wonder if he made the right decision to train to become an idol if this means losing Wonwoo.

He buried his face in the pillow and hit the pillow hard with his hands. Just then he caught the whiff of food and he heard footsteps and a deep voice call out to him. “Mingyu-ya, are you still asleep? Go wash up and get ready for brunch. I’m done cooking.”

Mingyu reluctantly rose from his position and eyed Wonwoo with a cute puppy look, “Wonwoo-hyung, can’t we have brunch in bed?”

Wonwoo rolled his eyes. “No! Get up before I drag you out of bed.”

Mingyu refused to budge. Wonwoo leaned forward to grab Mingyu only to have Mingyu pull him into the bed. Wonwoo lost his balance and fell forward causing his lips to graze the side of Mingyu’s lips before crashing onto Mingyu’s cheek.

Mingyu felt a hot flush on his cheeks. He heard Wonwoo mutter a quick apology. Wonwoo did not say another word after. Wonwoo’s expression was blank and unreadable as he got up and left the room.

Mingyu ignored his flush as he was more worried about Wonwoo’s thoughts. Wonwoo had kissed Mingyu before on Mingyu’s forehead or cheeks but Wonwoo never did graze Mingyu’s lips. Does Wonwoo find his lips grazing Mingyu’s lips disgusting? Mingyu wanted to scream, but instead he grabbed the pillow and groaned. This day was not turning out well.

Wonwoo had already set the table as Mingyu emerged from the small room. His hair was dishevelled and all over the place. Wonwoo chuckled at the sight and Mingyu felt relieved. At least he has gotten over their accidental “kiss”.

“What’s so funny?” Mingyu asked.

“Your bed hair,” Wonwoo pointed out. “I don’t mind the look but imagine if you become an idol and your fans see you like that…”

Mingyu pouted. “You’re no better hyung. You have messy bed hair too.” 

“Well, but I’m not going to be an idol…” Wonwoo said. “Come on, let’s eat.”

The two boys sat down and tucked into the simple brunch which Wonwoo prepared. It was just fried rice with some kimchi and ham which Wonwoo found in his near empty fridge. The rice was wrapped in an omelette and was decorated with eyes and smiley mouth.

Mingyu could not help but smile at Wonwoo’s less than perfect omurice.

“I’m sorry Mingyu-ya. There’s nothing much in the fridge except for leftover rice, eggs, ham and kimchi. I wanted to prepare something more nutritious and fulfilling, but we can do that tomorrow evening,” Wonwoo apologised as he picked at his food.

Mingyu stopped eating and hugged Wonwoo surprising the older who stopped eating. Wonwoo was used to Mingyu’s display of affection for him, and getting touchy-feely with Wonwoo. Wonwoo doesn’t mind it one bit but sometimes it still takes Wonwoo by surprise.

“Wonwoo-hyung, thank you for the food. This may be simple but it is one of the best meals I’ve eaten in a while. I really missed home-cooked food.”

“Mingyu-ya, is something wrong?” Wonwoo asked. “Is your company not providing you guys with adequate meals or something?”

Mingyu was startled by Wonwoo’s question. For a moment Mingyu forgot Wonwoo was a pretty sharp and alert person who can pick up insinuations and hidden meanings easily.

“The company treats us well. What I mean is that I missed your cooking,” Mingyu quickly responded.

Wonwoo nodded, but there was still some doubt in his gaze. “Mingyu-ya, some of these companies are dodgy. They do not treat their trainees well. I worry about you Mingyu-ya. If your company isn’t treating you well, please let me know okay? I’ll make sure I’ll do something about it…within legal means…”

Mingyu gulped. Wonwoo mustn’t know anything. Mingyu doesn’t want to add on any more burdens onto Wonwoo.

If hyung finds out what is happening to me, will he push me away? Will he think of me as disgusting and not have anything to do with me? He mustn’t find out. I cannot let him find out.

“My company’s fine. They treat us well,” Mingyu forced a smile.

Wonwoo shrugged. “If you say so, Mingyu-ya. But you can come to hyung if there’s anything. I’m also here for you.”

They finished the rest of the meal and Mingyu offered to help with the dishes and clean up. Wonwoo decided to take a shower as both of them decided to go out and enjoy the sunshine. Both of them were dressed casually in t-shirts, shorts and sunglasses.

……

The two boys rented two bicycles to ride round a park. Although the sun was shining, the weather was cool with a light breeze. They challenged each other to a race with Mingyu cheating a little to get a head start over Wonwoo. They cycled around for about an hour before finding a spot to settle down.

Wonwoo had packed a mat with him which he spread on the ground. They sat with their backs facing one another though they were able to see each other’s faces clearly.

Wonwoo took out a stack of papers, a highlighter and a pen and began to go through the articles bit by bit and marking out things which he thought was relevant. Mingyu knew that Wonwoo had an assignment due on Thursday so he just let Wonwoo do his research and reading for the assignment. He decided to listen to some music to get inspiration for lyrics writing. As the day was pleasant and beautiful, Mingyu felt his mood uplifted. It felt good to get outdoors rather than stay cooped up indoors. His mind felt rather refreshed and as he studied the people passing by, Mingyu felt inspired to write but he realised he didn’t bring any paper or pen with him and a scowl appeared on his face. Wonwoo noticed, and he reached for his notebook and a pen in his bag and passed it to Mingyu.

“Hyung…” Mingyu was surprised by Wonwoo’s gesture.

Wonwoo smiled. “I know writing lyrics is part of your training. And since you didn’t bring anything except for the snacks, I thought you might need this so I packed a spare notebook along with me.”

“Thanks hyung.”

Wonwoo nodded in acknowledgement and returned to his work. Mingyu proceeded to work hard on writing lyrics. Occasionally, he would stop his work and steal glances at Wonwoo.

Hyung is really handsome, Mingyu thought as he noticed Wonwoo deep in concentration…the intensity in his gaze…making his sharp features even more prominent. He finds Wonwoo extremely manly.

Sometimes Wonwoo would steal glances at Mingyu – the way Mingyu is deep in thought and twirling the pen. This is a different to the normally cute and slightly childish side of Mingyu and Wonwoo finds this side of Mingyu attractive. Deep inside, Wonwoo is really proud of Mingyu for working hard at his dreams of becoming an idol. Mingyu has really matured a lot emotionally over the last two years.

When Mingyu felt a little peckish, he reached for a packet of cookies which he packed as snacks and opened it. He left it at a convenient spot for Wonwoo to reach. There was a moment when both of them reached for the cookies at the same time. Their fingertips brushed against each other’s and they let the touch linger on for a few moments before Wonwoo withdrew his hand to allow Mingyu to get the cookie.

Finally when they were tired they just set their notes down, put on their sunglasses and lay down in silence. And that was how they spent most of the afternoon. They have not have talked much but they were happy as they were close to each other and felt each other’s presence which they missed for the last two weeks. The little touch and glances were enough for the two teenagers. It was nearing five in the afternoon when Wonwoo nudged Mingyu and told him they had to meet Jonghyun or JR at around six. The boys packed their belongings, cycled back to the rental kiosk, returned the bikes and headed off for their appointment.

…..

JR was already seated at the café when Wonwoo and Mingyu arrived. The boys exchanged hugs. Mingyu went to order drinks for Wonwoo and himself as JR already had a drink.

“How’s everything Woo?” JR asked.

“It’s that time of the semester when you have back to back tests and assignments,” Wonwoo groaned.

“But you’ll manage. You’re a hard worker and you’re intelligent. I believe in you. I believe you would be an awesome lawyer.”

“Thanks for the praise hyung. But I’m nowhere as smart as some of my peers in school.”

“But you’re disciplined and determined. And I know you want to succeed. But don’t stress yourself out Woo,” JR patted Wonwoo.

“I won’t hyung. Thanks for the concern.”

“Do you still have the nightmares?”

Wonwoo nodded.

“And Mingyu doesn’t know?”

“I don’t want him to know. He’s been through a lot. And he is really busy with his training. I don’t want to burden him with what has happened to me. I just want him to be happy and I don’t want the bad memories to return to him. He has had this fair share…” Wonwoo trailed off. “I’ll be fine as long as Mingyu is fine…”

“Woo, but you’re bearing the weight of the trauma and burdens of two people…don’t you feel like cracking?” JR countered.

“I’m fine. I won’t crack until the day justice is rightly served,” Wonwoo replied with determination.

JR sighed and his palm balled into a fist. “So many victims have suffered because of him.”

Wonwoo sighed. “I’m sure we’re not the only ones. There are probably other victims elsewhere. There are probably other perpetrators. There are probably others who cover up for the heinous deeds of the perpetrators. This is bound to explode sooner or later here. Europe, America and Australia have undergone or undergoing this crisis. I’m reading up on these cases. Maybe we could learn something from these cases and apply them here. I wish my English was better to understand the cases.”

JR patted Wonwoo. “Don’t worry too much about it or stress yourself over this…”

“For you…for Minki hyung…for Mingyu…for myself…for our brothers…and for the unnamed victims out there…I want to do something…” Wonwoo said resolutely.

“But Mingyu doesn’t know what you’re doing…” JR questioned.

“No he doesn’t. I don’t intend to tell him until the time comes…and I don’t want to drag him into this when the time comes…”

“You’re really protective of Mingyu,” JR remarked. “So when do you intend to confess your real feelings? You love him…and I think he loves you…it’s just a guess…but you know it’s no secret that he adores you…”

Wonwoo shrugged. “Things are good the way they are…and he has his idol life ahead of him…besides…I have my own demons I have to deal with…I’m not sure if I can bring him happiness…if I can love him as a man…and he might not love me the same way…and the twisted past and trauma…”

“I understand Woo. But you’re bringing him happiness…Speak of the devil…” JR pointed to a happy Mingyu who seemed to be skipping back to the table. He placed a beverage in front of Wonwoo. “Ice chocolate for you hyung.”

Mingyu had an Iced Americano.

The three boys chatted amongst themselves for almost two hours updating JR about their lives and JR updating about his life and telling stories from his work. JR was a few years older than Wonwoo and Mingyu so he was their hyung. They had grown up in the orphanage together. JR had left the orphanage before the two boys did. He is currently working in another city in Korea and will come to Seoul once every few months to visit his friends.

“How’s Minki hyung doing?” Mingyu asked. “We have not heard from him for a while.”

JR’s gaze shifted uneasily. Wonwoo sensed something was amiss but Mingyu did not pick it up one bit.

“He’s doing fine. He’s been busy recently. But I have met him on this visit,” JR replied albeit hesitantly.

“Wonwoo hyung, we should ask Minki hyung out one of these days,” Mingyu said enthusiastically.

Wonwoo nodded.

“Better not, he’s a bit busy with work,” JR interjected.

Wonwoo’s suspicions were now heightened. He made a note to ask JR privately about Minki.

……

The boys hugged one another as they bade farewell to JR. It was eight and Mingyu and Wonwoo decided to have dinner. Wonwoo led them to a barbecue place in order to make up for the almost meatless meal they had in the afternoon. They could not afford the most expensive cuts of beef but they had a delicious meal with pork belly and a cheaper cut of beef. Wonwoo would grill the meats while Mingyu would wrap the meat in the lettuce wrap and he would sometimes feed Wonwoo which the older would gladly accept. Sometimes Wonwoo would take a piece of grilled meat and feed Mingyu.

……

They headed back home feeling satisfied and tired. They took their separate showers and got into bed. Mingyu snuggled up to Wonwoo and hugged the older tightly. It wasn’t long before the both of them drifted off to sleep thankful for one another’s company and presence. 

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Happy Lunar New Year to all. And Happy Valentine's Day to all. Hope you enjoyed this little bit of Meanie fluff here in this chapter.

It's yet another y Valentine Day's for me being all along and see people around you go on dates - exacerbated by the fact that someone you like has a partner and the person unintentionally keeps talking about the partner. 

And @venulyn You did get that correct - the one being abused in Chapter 3 is Wonwoo. 

I caught the movie Spotlight a few weeks ago - which talked about how reporters at the Boston Globe uncovered the ual abuse scandal in the Catholic Church. It was a good and sobering movie. And I felt really angry at times. 

I guess it is pretty much established Wonwoo and Mingyu have suffered some kind of abuse. And it appears they aren't the only ones. I hope this part about the ual abuse isn't making you readers too uncomfortable.

What do you think Mingyu is hiding from Wonwoo?

Please do shower this fic with your comments, do upvote if your feel generous, and subscribe to it if you have not done so.

And if you have the time, please check out my JiKook fanfiction That Year, the Sun Shines