Curing Depression

Squeeeeeeek

“Ah!”

Darkness surrounding me vanished and I was hit by a small ray of reds and oranges from the sun which were being blocked by a big fat yellow square on my forehead. I reached up to pull it off as I looked around to figure out where I was. I was in a park for some reason laying on top of a bench shaded by a big tree. Memories were failing me now and all I could think about was blurs and fog for a minute as my eyes scanned the sticky note.

' Sorry for hitting you with my motorcycle and sorry for killing you too.'

I read the message twice before balling it up. What kind of person would play such a stupid prank? Did they want me to think I died and became a ghost? What a mean joke to do to a poor woman. Kids these days I swear.

The haze in my mind cleared away reminding me that I was alone and soon to be alone forever. Pain struck me hard as images of yesterday flashed before my eyes. It hurt me knowing that my husband didn't even bother to look for me after I ran out but then again I can't blame him. I ruined our marriage. I rocked myself back and forth for a minute pondering about what to do. Every fiber of my being kept telling me I had to go back home and plead again for him to love me again. I need to be careful with my words this time and try not to yell or cry. I have to be perfect.

I have to be perfect.

I chant this over and over in my head as I hopped off the bench. The sun felt brighter than normal nearly burning my skin. I walked under the shade to avoid the light as I raced back to my house. Every step carried a weight of sadness and irritation I felt like a boiling pot of water about the time I made it to my front door. My keys jangled as I put it into the keyhole. I forced a smile on my face as I swung open the door.

“Hubby I--”

My heart dropped as I saw all my things piled up in bags before me. I blinked away tears that were threatening to fall from my eyes as I approach my things. My hubby now stood before me with a suitcase.

“Peferct timing. I got all your stuff packed. You need help taking them to a cab?” he asked with that same annoyed look on his face.

“Hubby..can we have a talk?” I begged.

“No, I'm done talking with you.” he said harshly.

“But..we can't just end things like this. Our love is forever remember. We promised to be together no matter what.” I ran up and hugged him tightly around the waist. “You love me and I love you.”

“Jihyo let me go and take your stuff and leave.”

“Please..Please..you can't possibly love her more than me. I am your wife. Remember all the good times we had together. Our first kiss, our first date and when you proposed to me. Don't pretend that you don't. 'Cus I will never forget every word you said to me when you were down on your knees and especially on our wedding day.”

“I will love you with with every breath of air that I breathe..” He said lowly for only me to hear. It was the exact words he whispered sweetly in my ear when we had our first kiss as husband and wife. Warmth consumed my soul and I allowed a tear to roll down my cheek.

Everything went still for a moment now. All I could hear was his heartbeat but strangely I couldn't hear mine. I held onto him even tighter now enjoying this perfect peace. He pulled me away but still kept me close as he stared into my eyes just like back then. I fluttered my eyes shut awaiting for a kiss but that never came. Instead a bag was shoved into my hands.

“Jihyo, that was then this is now. I've moved on and so should you.” he opened the front door and threw my bags of clothes out on the sidewalk not caring that the bags ripped.

“Stop..please..Jin Young.” I grabbed onto his hand trying to get him to stop but he was determined to get everything out of the house including me. I can't believe that he's erasing all of me from his life just like this. Once he threw out the last bag he dragged me by the wrist to the door. “Please..Jin Young I just want to talk this out..” I cried but he didn't show any interest at all.

One minute I was crying the next he went flying towards a wall across the room. I stared at my hands then his body laying limp on the wooden floor. It had happen so quickly I just tried to get him to let go. All I did was lightly push him how did I? How could I have shoved him so hard like that? I...I..

“Ahh what have you done to my fiance?” His other woman had come from downstairs probably hearing the loud bang and went to his aid. I felt so guilty as I saw him whimper in pain as he rubbed his head. Her eyes pierced right through me as she shouted at me to leave.

“I...I..” I began to stutter but I didn't finish I still was in shock. I can't believe that I would hurt the only man I love in my entire life. My eyes went back to my hands unable to look at him suffer anymore.

“I'm calling the police.” she yelled.

I raced out the door now. I grabbed what I was able to carry and ran to the unknown. I listed all the people in my head that I knew but I had no idea who I could go to. Majority were friends of Jin Young then the other small percentage I hardly spoken to. There was one person though but I was afraid to call her..the last time we talked we argued. As the sky turned pale as a few drops of rain wetted my hair I came to a conclusion that I had no choice. I wouldn't survive on the streets..I had no money because I was a house wife. My family lived far away and I didn't want to burden them. I digged my phone out of my purse and pressed the phone icon next to her name: Shin Hye.

Ring Ring

“Hello.” she answered.

It's been so long since I had heard her voice I couldn't even respond instead I cried.

“Let me guess..your husband was a jerk today.” she began. “Where are you? I'll come get you.”

Now I am sitting here in my best friend's apartment. It feels like forever since I sat on her big mattress staring at her insane collection of posters covering her wall. All were pictures of models wearing her favorite brands and a few of boy bands. After having a good cry and a cup of tea, I told her everything that happened sparing no detail.

“He did what! “ she charged up to her drawer and pulled out a big kitchen knife. “I'll kill him.”

I rushed over to her and took the knife away.

“Yah! Are you crazy? This is all my fault..you should be stabbing me!” I teared up all over again.

“Bwoh? Are you stupid? How is it your fault that you husband is a nasty cheater getting some pregnant? You were a good wife to him.” she screamed at me. She went into her drawer and pulled out another knife much smaller. “I have been wanting to do this for a longest. I knew he'd do this to you.”

I blocked her from leaving her bedroom with my body.

“He said I was boring..plain looking and and...” I lost it and fell to my knees unable to say the last part. Shin Hye dropped her knife and hugged me.

“That is not your fault..he made you this way.” she tugged on a piece of my shirt. “This is so not your style at all and this hair.” she ruffled it. “You look like an ahjumma! Bestie why did you let yourself change like this for a jerk?”

“Because too many guys wanted to steal me. Jin Young was so upset over it..” I wiped a tear. “Our marriage already was having problems with me unable to get..pregnant.” I struggled saying the 'P' word.

“So you made yourself ugly because he lacked confidence. Jerk. Jerk. Jerk. Jerk. And it's not your fault you had a hard time having a baby. Jerk! I wish you'd let me stab him..but I guess you did enough already by slamming him against the wall.” she chuckled.

“SHIN HYE!” my face redden. Hurting him was the last thing that I wanted to do. What has gotten into me? I threw myself back onto the mattress and buried myself in a large pile of blankets wanting to just disappear from everything. I don't know how long I stayed like this but it didn't matter. I don't want to deal with this pain anymore I just want to sleep.

After what I would assume two days I became very hungry which would be normal from starvation. The need for food was giving me strange visions which caused me to grind my teeth. When Shin Hye entered the room I couldn't help but raise up out of the cocoon of pillows and blankets. There was a strong deliciously amazing smell that was emitting from her.

“Ok. I get it that your heart is broken but it's been a week and I haven't seen you leave that bed to eat or even freaking pee. Yah! You better not have been using the bathroom on my bed!” she yanked me off the bed. I took this as an opportunity to smell her.

Omg? Am I smelling my best friend like some weirdo?

Shin Hye caught me indulging in her scent after checking her bed for pee. As if I was some kind of animal or something. Crazy girl. She started chuckling like a little hyena suddenly which made me stop.

“Like my new perfume? It's amazing right? Right? It's Miley's newest perfume, Rebel! I bought it today at the mall it was like the last bottle and was not easy to get.”

By “bought' she actually meant was steal. Shin Hye hardly bought anything she owns. Either someone got it for her or she stole it. Yes, my best friend is a compulsive stealer and has an obsession with all things glam. I can't get her to stop..I don't think anyone can. Her past is pretty sad and messed up so I can understand why she can't help but want to become a princess to escape her pain.

“I really like it.” I replied. “Um..has it really been a week?” I changed topics.

“Yes. I seriously cannot take this anymore. I'm stuffing your face right now then we are going out!” she gave her order and I couldn't fight her off. I was too weak and slightly dazed by her perfume. Shin Hye managed to stuff me like a bird then forced me into a tiny black dress after a long shower. I felt like I was staring at myself from ten years ago when I looked in the mirror my jaw nearly dropped.

“You like?” she started applying more make up to my face and fixed my hair. Shin Hye was wearing a pink mini skirt with leopard printed knee high boots. Her hair was completely wild with it's massive amount of fluffy curls.

“No..” I lied. I liked it but I felt bad for liking it. I should hate it. This is the image that ruined my marriage. I can't be y Jihyo anymore.

“Too bad so sad I'm not letting you change. The guys will want to eat you up when they see you tonight.”

“G..guys. Wait where are we going?” my eyes widen as I stared at her.

“Out.” Was the only answer she gave me after she was satisfied with how we looked. I was pushed out her door and dragged down the night streets. It had been so long since I wore heels that I bumped into some strangers that we passed. I never said so many 'I'm sorrys' in my life.

I got my answer by what she meant by 'out'. It should have been a duh to me. Everyone knows that two ladies going out meant going to a bar or a club. My eyes widen even larger then before when I found myself in a flashy club filled with pop music and 20-something-year olds. I probably was the only woman in her 30's here.

“Bestie..I want to go.” I pleaded to her.

“No way. We won't leave until you start having fun and forgetting that loser of a husband.” she yelled over the music.

I felt everyone's eyes on me so I made myself look at my feet. Thrist started to consume me badly that I couldn't stop my cherry lip glossed lips. The crowd of dancing girls and guys all had the same smell like Shin Hye. Was that Miley perfume that popular? When we made it to the bar I think I ordered about 4 or maybe 5 drinks I lost count to be honest. I kept trying to appease my thirst with water, beer and liquor. Which only seem to satisfy me a little bit.

“Slow down there save some for me. You're about to drink the whole bar.” my best friend chuckled as snatched one of my beers and dranked it herself. “Wanna dance?”

I shook my head and she pouted for a minute but then suddenly stopped and smiled.

“Oh..I see. I'll leave you alone.” she chuckled and kept glancing past me at someone. My eyes followed her gaze to a guy who looked like a college kid. He was tall, handsome and had some adorable dimples as he smiled at me.

Bwoh? Wait..is he approaching me?

I looked back to where Shin Hye was once standing to discover she was gone. I cursed for my lame friend for ditching me.

“Hey, my friends call me Lay.” he sat at the empty seat next to me. “And what's your name beautiful.”

I don't know if I was blushing or just burning up from his gaze. I really couldn't think too straight. I almost forgot my name I had to think about it for a minute.

“Jihyo.” I sipped my beer after giving an embarrassed chuckle.

“You have a pretty laugh.” he flirted with me. “Are you having a fun time tonight.” I felt his hands start to invade my space slowly and it felt like he was getting closer to me...like mere inches from my face.

“No..actually I want to leave but my best friend won't let me.”

“Why?” he came even freaking closer to me and I could feel his hands on my back.

“It's complicated..” I trailed off returning to my drink which made everything all fuzzy and blurry.

“A pretty girl like you should be enjoying herself. Here..I'll help ease your mind.”he pulled me away from the bar stool and dragged my drunk to a corner of the club. We swayed our bodies to whatever beats were blaring from the speakers. Lay's perfume was seriously awakening some hunger in me. I really felt like jumping him right now and sinking my teeth into him. I don't know if it's the alcohol giving me these thoughts or my hormones. I hope it's the alcohol because I don't want to feel anything for anyone except Jin Young.

Our sways started to slow down and his hold on me tighten. I couldn't resist nipping on his neck as I took a big whiff of that addicting smell that's driving me crazy.

“Let's go somewhere private.” he whispered and I was led somewhere even darker then the club. I could barely see anything anymore nor hear the music. All I could hear was his voice and my breathing.

“What are you doing?” I found myself asking as I felt him trying to kiss me. “I'm married!”

“Don't worry this can be our sece...”

He didn't get to finish his sentence. Someone else had entered into the room and pulled him away from me. I could hear punches, grunts and stuff being knocked about. My senses told me to run but I just stood there trying to see whom this other person was. The fight ended quickly and something was shoved into my hands before I was pushed out of the room and back to the light filled hallway.

It was a tiny bottle with red pills and two yellow sticky notes.

'Don't go off with shady guys alone.'

What are you my father?

'In the bottle is pills that will satisfy the thirst.'

Was this for real or am I dreaming? I didn't think too deeply about the possibilities that I that might have a stalker I just wanted the thirst to go away. So I wasted no time swallowing a blood red pill down my throat. Awaiting to see if the message was true.

Author's Note

My present to you readers.. Merry Christmas. I really appericiate allthe subscribers and upvotes. Thank you so much for reading my story.